Another Mark T. recommendation!...plus, buyer''s remorse?

[midwestgirl]

I just wanted to share the exciting news that my cushion diamond (.81 F VS2, EX/EX) from Mark at ERD arrived and it is beautiful!! So sparkly and alive...and of course much more impressive than the photo I received from him

Unfortunately I don''t have a working digital camera at the moment, but I just wanted to share this because I wanted to recommend anyone to Mark - such a great person to work with, a total gentleman!

And an unrelated issue as I wait for the setting (and proposal!!)...I''m curious if anyone has ever had buyer''s remorse related to their ring? Specifically for me, I''m getting a Beverly K setting from Pearlmans and decided to go with platinum because they gave us such a good deal and I have always envisioned my ring being platinum (I know that any yellowing of the metal would bother me). Of course it is significantly more expensive than white gold, so I''m having some guilt about it because my boyfriend doesn''t have much money and we went over the "2 months salary" guideline. He says that I shouldn''t worry about it because I''m going to have it forever and it will be a family heirloom, so why am I overthinking this?? Has anyone else had similar feelings? Any reassurance would be appreciated

 

[luckynumber7]

congrats on getting your diamond.

i''m sure it''s gorgeous. can''t wait to see pics.

re: buyer''s remorse - i kinda experienced the same thing too. before i finally let it go, i was back and forth about the entire purchase (did i pick the right diamond? should i have waited some more before buying it? did i choose the right setting? should i have spent less than what i did?

). i was overanalyzing everything to the point that my bf had to tell me (firmly but in a nice way

) to stop worrying about it because he''s happy about the purchase and that i should be happy (and content) too. that knocked some sense into me. i have this great guy who loves me dearly and who got me my dream ring.

we didn''t go over his budget and i even joked that he should get me something else for not going over. hahaha! dream on right??

so i guess my advice is to relax and enjoy the moment. as long as your bf is comfy and happy with the purchase, then everything should be fine.

 

[mrssalvo]

aw midwestgirl. i think most people have a time of second guessing. however, I do think over time you''ll be so happy you went ahead and went with platinum for your e-ring. i really do. the 2 month salary thing is marketing, so go more, some go less. it sounds like your boyfriend did exactly what he feels comfortable with so try to just enjoy the wonderful gift he''s going to give you

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

My feeling is that the pain of the expense will only come once; that otherwise will be enjoyed, everyday minute of everyday for the rest of your life.

cheers--Sharon

 

[LegacyGirl]

I''m sure you will be happy with it! I can''t wait to see pics.

 

[pixley]

I''m so glad you love that stone - it looked like it was going to be a total winner! I absolutely think it''s normal to have jitters about something so monumental, but if your sweet BF says not to worry about it, then don''t and just revel in it''s deliciousness!

If you went with white gold you''d be paying to have it refinished over time, not to mention the unsightly yellowing in between, so going with platinum will be worth it in the long run.

 

[midwestgirl]

I really appreciate the responses. (Pixley the replating factor is definitely one of the ways I am comforting myself!).

I think part of my issue is the example set by my parents, who are not into the whole engagement ring idea - they didn''t have one themselves and just wear plain gold bands. So I didn''t grow up with the idea of putting a lot of money into something so small...but I just have to accept that the symbolism means a lot to me and my BF. (Or I could go with my grandmother''s example, she had a huge EC ring that was stolen when she was in a nursing home with Alzheimers, how awful is that?? I would have loved to look at it more closely now that I know something about diamonds

Anyway, it''s time to settle in for the waiting period, Beverly K rings take at least a month to make!

 

[CrookedRock]

Congrats on finding your stone! I completely understand your buyers remorse. Actually the morning we went to Marks office to actually buy our stone, I got off the elevator and started crying. I walked into Mark''s office looking like such a dork. You should have seen the look on his face. Who the heck cries bc someone wants to buy you something so nice that reflects the love between the two of you... I do! LOL
Right now I''m not feeling as bad, but I am sure that when it is finally presented to me I will feel that way again. But we have to remember that it is the symbol that is the important thing.

 

[ajl]

I think it is a midwest thing! Keep it mind that you will probably wear this everyday- you will love it and it is going to be beautiful. Relax, enjoy!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I think your buyer''s remorse would be much greater if you had gotten wg just to save money. I have learned the hard way that I am much happier in the long run if I go for the quality I really want at the outset. You would have ended up wanting to reset the stone later, and just think how much that would have cost on top of an original setting!!!

 

[honey22]

I totally understand that feeling. My partner does a lot of on-call work and overtime, but he is happy to do it. A lot of the time he will only be on-ste for an hour or less and we will get his 8 hours call out. I can''t get overtime as I am on salary so an extra money he really contributes too. After 12 years we are cool with the 100% OUR money thing don''t get me wrong, but I felt incredibly guilty spending $7 on my ering! I even cried all morning the day we decided to go for it, I felt so bad. I rarely spend money on myself and I guess I felt a bit selfish, despite my wonderful partner assuring me I was 100% worth the money. I know this sound ridiculous, as we had already discussed our budget and what we were comfortable with, but I guess it really hit me that morning that we were about to spend this huge lump of money on a sparkly for me. I took me a few weeks for that guilty sick feeling to wear off I must admit. Now I just wanna wear it! *impatiently stomps foot*

We can totally afford this ring, it won''t be a financial burden, so I guess I just needed to put things into perspective for me, and allow myself this once-in-a-lifetime special symbol of our engagment without worrying about spending $$$ on me.

I could be hit my a bus tomorow and I don''t want to be lying there on the road in the clutches of death thinking, geez I really wish I had that D colour ACA I had my heart set on, now I will die with a small, crappy included diamond on my hand. Nup, not worth it!

Enjoy your sparkly ring and this special time, waiting for him to pop the question can be maddening at times, but I am sure it will be all worth it when the time comes!!

 

[Sparkles4Luv]

Midwestgirl- Don''t feel too bad. It happens to every one in some way or another!

I''ve turned things around in my head so many times that I''ve think I''ve lost way too much sleep and almost become sick over it! We had initially bought a diamond at a local chain store and even though my fiance was great about paying extra for a diamond that we knew definitely didn''t merit it, I couldn''t live with that knowledge (or the sub par diamond heehee). So I finally convinced him to return it and we bought beautiful diamond from jamesallen.com that was well within our budget. Now the setting...eek..more drama (and money) haha. But I''m sure I will feel good about it once it''s all done...

Don''t forget you have a life time together so this will be a special moment in your life..but you have so many more to come..don''t stress over it..enjoy it!

 

[Deelight]

Congratualtions on your diamond I am sure it will be STUNNING

What your feeling is completely normal

I am kinda struggling with the same thing atm with the diamond we have ordered, it was at the top end of our budget and slightly smaller then I originally wanted but a higher colour and clarity then my minimum that I was prepared to go so it is all good. After I placed my order I saw the same size diamond from the same vendor just slightly lower colour and lower clarity for 5k less. I told my BF the same thing and he still thought it was better to stick with the one we originally both fell in love with . I still have slight issues with it and feel bad but much like by the sounds of your BF''s thinking this will be our forever ring and one I will pass on if it was not the engagement ring it would be a different story, I try not to think about the cost of the setting .

Something that helps me rationalize such a major purchase is to split the cost of the diamond and setting over 50 years works out to about or a little less then a cup of coffee a day , makes it a little less huge .

Now you just have to try and relax and wait for him to pop the question

Crooked Rock: I am glad I am not the only one that cried like that it is such an overwhelming feeling.

 

[midwestgirl]

Date: 4/8/2008 1:50:37 AM
Author: honey22


I could be hit my a bus tomorow and I don''t want to be lying there on the road in the clutches of death thinking, geez I really wish I had that D colour ACA I had my heart set on, now I will die with a small, crappy included diamond on my hand. Nup, not worth it!

Honey, this literally made me laugh out loud.

Thank you all for your responses - it is nice to know I''m not the only one who has had issues with this...in fact I cried too! I think part of it is just being overwhelmed (in a good way) with what the ring means and what an amazing person I get to spend my life with. And because I won''t want to upgrade in the future, I need to focus on the fact that this will be my ring forever. I can''t wait to share it with you guys!