advice on negotiating with caterers

[FLgirl41]

Ok so I don''t know if I am being niave or just not looking hard enough. But every proposal for caterers is coming way out of my league.

Is my budget for a caterer just to low. I have it set at absolutely no more than $4,500. This includes food for an estimate of 150 people, dinner ware, flat ware, glass ware, ivory linens, and labor and service fees. But every proposal i have gotten so far their laber and service fees eats up almost my entire budget. My fiance and I are paying for the wedding ourselves so our budget really can''t budge. And I really don''t want to change venues because I love the venue and I have always wanted my wedding there.

I don''t know what to do, any suggestions?

 

[anchor31]

I do think 4.5k is pretty low for 150 people...

I''m in a pretty inexpensive area and found a venue that''s very reasonably priced, and everything (food, cocktail, wine, open bar and rentals) goes up to 4.5k for 100 people (45$/person) before taxes and service fees. It goes up to 5.5k with them, which is pretty much freaking me out because we do have to pay for half of that.

How much more are the caterers asking? Do you think using the "I really really want to hire you but just can''t afford it" approach and finding some kind of compromise could work?

Sorry if I''m not much help!

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

I agree, I don''t think that is unreasonable at all. For a sit down dinner and having to rent everything like you do, expect to pay $75 a person. You can cut the guest list, have a buffet, or have daytime reception which are a little cheaper. Also consider these things to bring down cost:
Don''t rent non-necesities like chair covers
Only have one type of apytizer layed out, no waiters
Have only salad, entree and cake for desert
offer only two kinds of entrees, probably chicken and vegitarian, they are cheap and it is usually cheaper to have fewer kinds of food
Consider simple to make apitizers like shrimp cocktail or brie which are often cheaper than time consuming ones
If you have a sewing machine, Buy bulk fabric and make your own table cloths
Also, have you thought about drinks?
I am sorry for the poor spelling, I am at work and can''t take the time to spell better.

 

[FLgirl41]

Well that is a damper. I just can not afford $75 a person. That is way out of my league. And my fiance will NOT budge on our budget. I suggest increasing it $3000. but he won''t have it. If we did that we would be fine. One caterer came back at $6,800. I think that would be reasonable, but I don''t know. I don''t think it will happen. Back to the drawing board.

 

[hikerchick]

We are catering for about 150 for pretty close to your budget. What state/city are you located near? It can be done in many places but not all places. We are having a wedding with 150 guests for half the cost of an average wedding in the area. I am doing a LOT of stuff myself and have searched high and low for vendors we can afford. I have gotten quite good at searching for bargains . . . If you tell me your city and state, I will see what I can dig up. Good Luck.

- hikerchick

 

[Pandora II]

I''m paying $5,000 in the UK for 120 people. Here it''s generally much more expensive than the US, and this is in a very expensive area, so I''m sure you should be able to cut them down a bit in someway.

I''ve kept it down to my budget by having:

A plated starter - probably a goat''s cheese tart with caramelized onion marmalade (easy to make in advance and not fiddly)

A mixed buffet of cold meats and whole poached salmon, with a selection of salads and potatoes

Strawberries and cream

The ingredients are all organic and locally sourced so even though it''s simple it should taste nice.

The venue are providing white linens, white tableware, glassware and flatware, and provide a small number of serving staff. Luckily, you don''t tip in the UK so that will save some £.

The other way I have saved money is on the cake stand and knife - they charge $50 for hiring those. I managed to get a lvery arge sterling silver cake knife (in the same flatware pattern) for $10 on ebay, and I''m keeping my eye on the cake stands.

Don''t be scared to change menus around or to tell caterers your max budget and see if they can work with it. And don''t worry about having something that doesn''t sound fancy on a menu (you can always write it in french

).

You can also do something unexpected and original. My cousin had a selection of locally-made sausages with mashed potatoes for his entree and everyone loved it - their wedding was featured in Tatler, who also picked out the sausage and mash as a great idea.

I only remember the food at a wedding if it is particularly amazing or particularly awful (quite often - and normally where people have spent $$$$ on the food).

To be honest - and I''d never say anthing to them - the food at my FBIL''s wedding two weeks ago was terrible. The entree was filet mignon and apparently some sort of fish. They had totally overcooked the steak and the fish was inedible. It was a very expensive venue and I dread to think what they paid.

I get to eat in some amazing restaurants as part of my job, so I know good food when I taste it. Good ingredients cooked simply taste much better than something elaborate and fussy.

Not sure if any of this helps, but thought I''d throw some ideas out...

 

[Independent Gal]

Well, the area of the country that we're having WP2 is WAY less expensive in terms of cost of living than my not-THAT-expensive part of the US, and we couldn't find a caterer that was half decent for less than the equivalent of US$45 per person (NOT including tax, tips, beverages, canapes etc.), but excellent food is important to us, so we're actually planning on around $150 p/p, including booze, tips, taxes, and everything. For juuuuust three courses of food (no coffee, tea, drinks, canapes, taxes or tips) it's about $60ish pp.

So I guess it just depends on what kinds of things you're willing to sacrifice.... fewer guests? worse quality food? less food (maybe don't serve dinner!) buffet instead of sit down service?

ETA: Just to second what Hikerchik said, we're doing massive DIY, and cost cutting EVERYWHERE so that we can afford the great food. It can be done! E.g., consider a sample gown or a pre-owned one and you save yourself a couple of thousand right there. Consider doing the invitations yourself (I'm in love with invitesite.com where I bought mine!) and they can still look gorgeous, but cost $1000 less. Boom, you've already got an extra 3K to spend on food! Then ask yourself: do you really NEED that custom toasting set? Or cake server? All the little stuff that adds up!

 

[FLgirl41]

Date: 10/9/2007 4:41:49 PM
Author: hikerchick
We are catering for about 150 for pretty close to your budget. What state/city are you located near? It can be done in many places but not all places. We are having a wedding with 150 guests for half the cost of an average wedding in the area. I am doing a LOT of stuff myself and have searched high and low for vendors we can afford. I have gotten quite good at searching for bargains . . . If you tell me your city and state, I will see what I can dig up. Good Luck.

- hikerchick

We are having our wedding in St. Paul/Minneapolis, MN it is a prettty big metro area. Any help would be great.

 

[FLgirl41]

I have already figured in my duget DIY items. I am trying to figure out ways to do my own center peices as well. I am not spending more than $500 on invites, I don''t know if DIY would be cheaper. My dress only cost $600, we are doing a very casual Grooms dinner (a local pizzeria in Minneapolis which is great and at my sisters house and beer).

I just don''t know where to cut. Our list is a majority family of 90 people on our guest list and then close - close family and friends. So we can''t cut there. but we are having our wedding the weekend before Christmas so I think that will cut our list. I am trying to be safe and have quotes at 150 - 175, but I really think it will be 100-125. My extended family is in New york and half of FI is in kansas.

I have to think positevely and not be discouraged by a couple proposals. I am still waiting on a quote from one more place that will be closer to $4,500. So we will see. It is $27.95 including labor and service fees and table ware. So I am hoping for not more hidden costs and it will be in our range if we had 125 people. Cross your fingers. But I keep looking and try and find some more.

I see why planning can be stressful. The stupid money aspect. O-well. THank you all for suggestions on where to cut costs.

 

[oobiecoo]

My reception is in a small town near Austin, TX and we are paying $35/person for venue rental, food (buffet style), cake, plates etc., and service. I did a TON of research before we found this place and many caterers do seem to be kind of high. Have you gotten proposals from any restaurants? We talked to several restaurants who also cater and they were MUCH cheaper than a catering company. You could always just do finger foods... I even read in a budget wedding idea book that one couple lived in a large city and just ordered take-out from a ton of their fav restaurants... indian, chinese, etc. and you could serve it on the acrylic(i think thats what they are) plates that they sell at places like Sams Club. They look really nice and are super cheap!

 

[partyjewels]

Our reception is going to end up around $5,000 for 200 people, but it''s a buffet and it''s at a restaurant in their banquet (they''re entire lower level is a banquet hall with a dance floor, it''s own bar, etc etc), so I didn''t have to worry about hiring people to come in and serve the food or anything like that. I agree on letting them know your budget and seeing what they can do with it though. You never know what places are willing to do if you don''t ask!

 

[FLgirl41]

I got a quote from a caterer that I found on theknot.com for the Minneapolis area that is $2,859. But I don''t think that includes the service charge. They said they use corell dinner plates though. Do those look cheap? Or if I use there gold chargers would it make them look more formal.

I am just hoping that my venue approves this Caterer. Is there any reason why a venue would not approve a caterer?

 

[Cleopatra]

Most venues only approve caterers that have insurance. Make sure that this caterer has insurance and it should be ok - unless this venue likes to promote their own catering business partners....That would be something to call about! Good luck! And it sounds like a wonderful price!

 

[FLgirl41]

So the caterer that was around $2800 included everything!!!! But not cake cutting, which is only $0.75 per person! Plus the venue approved the caterer.

So my mom is going to go taste testing next week and see what she thinks. My FIand I aren''t really elaborate eaters, so as long as the chicken is moist and tastes good and the presentation is decent, it is a done deal. You can''t find much of a better deal than that. But I am still waiting on a couple more quotes. But this is really working out! Plus it is way WAY under my budget, saweet! Now I can get chocolate table clothes!

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Glad to hear the update. Hope it works out!

 

[hikerchick]

Well, it sounds like you already found the solution . . . congrats.
In case you are interested in staying well below budget there are a number of other ways to save money that I am using to keep within our budget:

DIY invites . . . They take time so you have to decide what your time is worth. I am doing our invites 100% DIY and I am estimating that it will cost about $1.75 per invite including the cost of all the envelopes AND postage. However, I have lots of patience and am a crafty person and don''t sleep too much, hahaha.

Also, I called around to find the least expensive baker who can make cupcakes. This will eliminate the cost of cake cutting which my caterer also does not provide. Also, you don''t have to worry about cake serving sets, etc.

I am DIY my flowers by ordering roses online and that is saving us over $500.

My centerpieces are candles, lots of them and should only cost about $10 per table.

We splurged on the venue because it is GORGEOUS and this helps us eliminate ceremony decor for our outdoor ceremony on the grounds of a Castle.

I shopped around for photographers in our budget and found a relatively young photographer with really gorgeous photos whose prices were reasonable. We are skipping a videographer.

Also, I know people really flip out about cash bars but we are serving wine and cider on tables and our caterer is proving an indian drink (mango lassi) with the appetizers. We are also providing open non-alcoholic drinks. The rest will be cash bar. I know this isn''t an option for everyone because of regional, social and cultural pressures BUT for us it will work just fine and help save a few thousand $$$. Our family and friends know our financial situation and understand that venues really mark up the price of alcohol, they love us enough to not judge what we can afford and for that we are extremely lucky.

I am considering buying my bridal outfit used if I can find what I need.

And I am always on the hunt for other money saving ideas. You can have an amazing wedding on a budget, it just requires some flexibility and extra "elbow grease"

Good Luck.

 

[FLgirl41]

Date: 10/11/2007 2:02:00 PM
Author: hikerchick
Well, it sounds like you already found the solution . . . congrats.
In case you are interested in staying well below budget there are a number of other ways to save money that I am using to keep within our budget:

DIY invites . . . They take time so you have to decide what your time is worth. I am doing our invites 100% DIY and I am estimating that it will cost about $1.75 per invite including the cost of all the envelopes AND postage. However, I have lots of patience and am a crafty person and don''t sleep too much, hahaha.

Also, I called around to find the least expensive baker who can make cupcakes. This will eliminate the cost of cake cutting which my caterer also does not provide. Also, you don''t have to worry about cake serving sets, etc.

I am DIY my flowers by ordering roses online and that is saving us over $500.

My centerpieces are candles, lots of them and should only cost about $10 per table.

We splurged on the venue because it is GORGEOUS and this helps us eliminate ceremony decor for our outdoor ceremony on the grounds of a Castle.

I shopped around for photographers in our budget and found a relatively young photographer with really gorgeous photos whose prices were reasonable. We are skipping a videographer.

Also, I know people really flip out about cash bars but we are serving wine and cider on tables and our caterer is proving an indian drink (mango lassi) with the appetizers. We are also providing open non-alcoholic drinks. The rest will be cash bar. I know this isn''t an option for everyone because of regional, social and cultural pressures BUT for us it will work just fine and help save a few thousand $$$. Our family and friends know our financial situation and understand that venues really mark up the price of alcohol, they love us enough to not judge what we can afford and for that we are extremely lucky.

I am considering buying my bridal outfit used if I can find what I need.

And I am always on the hunt for other money saving ideas. You can have an amazing wedding on a budget, it just requires some flexibility and extra ''elbow grease''

Good Luck.

Thanks for all the great tips. My fiance and I are doing the same thing for the bar. I have only had a couple complaints from friends. But then I tell them that we are paying for the wedding not my parents and then they understand. The place we are having our reception requires a $500 minimum so I think we are going to buy a keg and then either wine or champagne for the tables. I do like the idea of having open nonalchoholic beverages!

An update on the caterers also. I found another caterer within my price range. This one is $1000 more than the other but I think it is better quality. My mom is meeting with them next week. I am hoping she can bring him down a little bit. The guy seemed super cool and excellent to work with. I am just crossing my fingers it all works out.

 

[Independent Gal]

That''s GREAT news FL! Keep us posted.