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[Cailet]

Well- after lurking for a week or so I have finally decided to post!

Me: 29 (eek! I''ll be 30 in April)
Him: 31 (I''ll just refer to him as J)

We met in college -- although we did go to the same High School we didn''t know each other-- he was my best friend''s RA in the dorms. I moved in with her the next year and was part of the building staff -- so he and I were sort of co-workers but he was still my RA as well.

We started going out to movies and study dates -- me all the while thinking we were just friends and him all the while thinking we were dating! Ha! It wasn''t until his 23 birthday that we actually had a talk and realized that we were in fact dating. HA!

So those of you who are really talented at math would know that that puts us at about 8 - almost 9 - years of dating. 2 years ago we had a "break" where we were broken up for about 6-7 months. Well J , my BF, came around after the 7 months telling me that he has realized he can''t live without me and that if he thought I would accept he would have asked me to marry him. I grudgingly agree to go out to dinner with him to catch up and see if this is something I want to restart -- which I obviously decide to do and here we are today still together 2 years after the break.

I have a tendancy to ramble on and on so I''m trying my best to be quick!

We have spoken about marriage a lot -- at this point we are living together - sort of -- he owns a duplex and I live in the upper unit and he lives in the lower. We spend almost all of our time together -- eat all of our meals together and GASP sleep together. His whole family treats me like we are already married -- everyone on my side assume we are getting married it is just a matter of him proposing. Well - we are both really slow - and since the break I have really wanted to make sure we know what we are doing. So I haven''t really pushed for us to take that next step. We have talked about how many kids we want -- where we think we would have the ceremony -- and he even mentioned wanting to do some pre-marital counselling to get us ready (did I mention we are really slow!). So then once he mentioned the counselling I start looking around on line - for places to go for that as well as checking out some of the wedding/marriage sites out there . Stumbled into pricescope and have been hooked ever since.

And while we are both really slow about relationships (did I mention that already) now that I have been looking around and reading about all these other girls getting ready for "married life", what being married means to them and about how being a wife is different from being a GF - I realize that that is really what I want - and you know once you KNOW what you want - you want it as soon as humanly possible.

I didn''t really tell the BF that I have surfing around looking at all this stuff (except for the counselling stuff) because at first it was just curiosity but now... I plan to have a chat possibly tonight (if he doesn''t have to work late) or this weekend and let him know what I am thinking/feeling but thought I would come on here and get it all off my chest and get some tips from all you gals so I don''t totally explode when telling him all this and freak him out!!

Ok - I''m sure this all came out in a jumble but it''s hard to put all of the chaos that is going on in my head into sensible grammatically correct sentences!!
I guess that''s it for now - I''m sure I''ll be posting a ton in the next couple of weeks!

 

[AmberWaves]

Welcome Cailet!

Or should I say, Welcome home! A whole lot of us are in the same boat, then new people come in, and some leave (or try to leave, I''ve heard it''s hard to). But here we understand, and we talk and help! It''s nice to meet you!

 

[caligal]

HUGE Welcome Cailet!

PS has been my addiction since June- it really is a great place to vent and help other women. How did the talk go?

 

[jenwill]

Welcome Cailet! I have added you to the Official LIst...and look forward to hearing how your talk went. There are plenty of slow paced relationships here...and some fast ones too! Always good to have another voice to listen to, and there are lots of ''ears'' here for when you need to talk.

 

[snuga]

Hi and WELCOME!!

Nothing wrong with being in a "slow" relationship! If that works for you, that''s all that matters!

 

[Cailet]

Thanks for the warm welcome everyone! How great is it to have found a place with gals who are thinking / feeling the same crazy thoughts as I am??

Well the BF had to work late last night and he''s off to FL for a business trip and doesn''t get back until Sunday

We chatted a little bit before bed last night but it was already 11:30 and since I have to be to work by 7AM (with a 45 minute commute) I didn''t want to get into "the chat" that late. Part of it too was that since he is travelling for the next couple of days I didn''t want us to have a partial chat and then have him be gone for a while until we could finish the chat.
As I''m writing this it sounds like excuses to me for why I didn''t stay up later and talk about it already...
Ah well - now that I have decided we are going to have a new discussion I fell a little less stressed out about the whole situation - more excited to see what he thinks.

I''m hoping that he comes up with a timeline at least close to what I am thinking -- of course right now I would like it as soon as possible, but since we haven''t gone to any stores at all yet and I''m not even sure which ring styles I like (I know what pictures I like, but rings always look so different actually on the finger) I would hope that we could make a deadline of my 30th birthday (April).

So that would mean I would be here with all you other LIW for at least a couple of months! That part at least will be fun!

 

[SoonIHope]

Welcome Cailet!

That sounds so exciting!! I can''t wait to hear how your talk goes! It is exciting to be right on the verge of something so huge, even if the waiting does drive us a bit crazy at times. (Well, a LOT of the time

) So yeah, just hang out here and keep us updated on your situation, and while you''re at it, browse the E-Ring Folder in Show Me the Ring to get some good ideas (aka fan the obsession)