- Joined
- Jan 26, 2003
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I went looking through pages of threads to see if there was one that looked appropriate to which to attach this posting. I didn't think it needed a thread of its own, although all kinds of improbable posts lead to good threads. 
(And, conversely, all kinds of innocent topics sometimes lead to contentious threads that Ella has to close down.) Suffice it to say that I didn't find one that suited me.
Last night my daughter, who is 27 but has serious emotional problems, was out with her fiancé.
( I have posted about her and also about him, but I don't expect everyone to follow my life story closely.) He was living here, but cannot any longer. I am very torn. My daughter wants him here all the time. My husband, brother, and great-nephew want him completely off the property.In fact my brother said that if I let him back he would wash his hands of this whole situation. That is because Matt came in, angry, and ranted here making threats against my husband's life. I kept my husband from calling 911 because Matt has convinced me that any contact with the police would automatically send him back to prison for five years.I didn't feel that calling 911 about Matt yelling was the same as calling them about someone else.(And he was only yelling.)
At any rate, that is only background. Matt has been sleeping in his car. Thank God we got him a car. He saved money for a car; waited to become 25 so that insurance prices would be lower; got it insured; got it emissions tested; got it registered. Every step was painful and involved towing the car and fixing it and so forth, But now he has shelter.I really put my foot down about him beig here, though. So last night, for the first time, my daughter went out with him in his car to sleep where he parks it. He has acquired a camp stove (from his mother) with which to cook and cooked pasta for them. The police questioned him when he parked in front of my house, but where he parks now is a different kind of neighborhood. The police there do not bother him.
Late at night, after 10 PM at any rate, when my daughter wasn't home, I got a phone call for her. It was a man who tried to use a phoney first name but whose identity I guessed as one of her several heroin using/having been to prison friends. This was one who has done unspeakable things to her and cruelly used her. He is one of the few that I never willingly let into my house. (She sneaked men in, though, in the past before Matt.) He asked me if he could get in touch with my daughter because he thought her former boyfriend, B, had overdosed and died.He said he kew my daughter had ways of getting in touch with him.
I asked him if he knew how to get in touch with Matt and told him she was with him. They got in touch. When my daughter couldn't reach B by phone, she went to his parents' house. Remember this is almost midnight at this point. People were sitting around the kitchen table and his mother yelled at her to get out. She could only assume that he was, indeed, dead. So she left Matt and came home to sleep with me because she was so upset. B was her boyfriend for six years even though they fought and broke up from time to time everyone knew they were a couple. They really broke up a year or so ago. B used to call me "mom".When he managed to get off heroin and to earn the right to get the treatment for Hepatitis C because he had been clean for so long, we were so happy for him. But then he relapsed.
I just thought of what I wanted to call this thread: A Sad Story. I have spoken of Matt's childhood. He was an abused child whose parental rights were terminated.Until he was 9 and placed with his grandmother, he was in foster care. B was born i Bolivia and his parents came here. He grew up in an orphanage there. Both of them grew up longing for their mothers.Life just isn't fair.I decided to share this because I couldn't sleep. Thanks for being there.
Deb/AGBF
(And, conversely, all kinds of innocent topics sometimes lead to contentious threads that Ella has to close down.) Suffice it to say that I didn't find one that suited me.Last night my daughter, who is 27 but has serious emotional problems, was out with her fiancé.
( I have posted about her and also about him, but I don't expect everyone to follow my life story closely.) He was living here, but cannot any longer. I am very torn. My daughter wants him here all the time. My husband, brother, and great-nephew want him completely off the property.In fact my brother said that if I let him back he would wash his hands of this whole situation. That is because Matt came in, angry, and ranted here making threats against my husband's life. I kept my husband from calling 911 because Matt has convinced me that any contact with the police would automatically send him back to prison for five years.I didn't feel that calling 911 about Matt yelling was the same as calling them about someone else.(And he was only yelling.)
At any rate, that is only background. Matt has been sleeping in his car. Thank God we got him a car. He saved money for a car; waited to become 25 so that insurance prices would be lower; got it insured; got it emissions tested; got it registered. Every step was painful and involved towing the car and fixing it and so forth, But now he has shelter.I really put my foot down about him beig here, though. So last night, for the first time, my daughter went out with him in his car to sleep where he parks it. He has acquired a camp stove (from his mother) with which to cook and cooked pasta for them. The police questioned him when he parked in front of my house, but where he parks now is a different kind of neighborhood. The police there do not bother him.
Late at night, after 10 PM at any rate, when my daughter wasn't home, I got a phone call for her. It was a man who tried to use a phoney first name but whose identity I guessed as one of her several heroin using/having been to prison friends. This was one who has done unspeakable things to her and cruelly used her. He is one of the few that I never willingly let into my house. (She sneaked men in, though, in the past before Matt.) He asked me if he could get in touch with my daughter because he thought her former boyfriend, B, had overdosed and died.He said he kew my daughter had ways of getting in touch with him.
I asked him if he knew how to get in touch with Matt and told him she was with him. They got in touch. When my daughter couldn't reach B by phone, she went to his parents' house. Remember this is almost midnight at this point. People were sitting around the kitchen table and his mother yelled at her to get out. She could only assume that he was, indeed, dead. So she left Matt and came home to sleep with me because she was so upset. B was her boyfriend for six years even though they fought and broke up from time to time everyone knew they were a couple. They really broke up a year or so ago. B used to call me "mom".When he managed to get off heroin and to earn the right to get the treatment for Hepatitis C because he had been clean for so long, we were so happy for him. But then he relapsed.
I just thought of what I wanted to call this thread: A Sad Story. I have spoken of Matt's childhood. He was an abused child whose parental rights were terminated.Until he was 9 and placed with his grandmother, he was in foster care. B was born i Bolivia and his parents came here. He grew up in an orphanage there. Both of them grew up longing for their mothers.Life just isn't fair.I decided to share this because I couldn't sleep. Thanks for being there.
Deb/AGBF
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