- Joined
- Apr 3, 2004
- Messages
- 33,852
monarch64|1367479074|3438619 said:Nope, and I have a lot to be vengeful for. But I refuse to stoop to his level. I could tell you stories that would BLOW YOUR MIND about my ex, but you know what? I've moved on.
Before I met my now-love and husband/father of my child, love of my life, I did consider exacting revenge on my ex. But I believe that karma will take care of things. Now, happily married and mother and wife to two of the greatest people I've ever met, I can safely say I don't give a rat's a$$ about any of that revenge stuff anymore. It's for the birds. Life is short (cliche), why waste time or energy on the *******s you come across in life?
Btw, it's not just ex husbands or wives or lovers I feel this way about. Ex friends=same thing. Rid thee of the toxins, I say.
She can play the same game too...Circe|1367505210|3438733 said:I'm actually really horrified this is A Thing - partially because of the creepy dudes who think, "Huh, so I got dumped ... know what'll make me feel better? Humiliating my ex!" but even more so because OTHER DUDES SPECIFICALLY LOOK FOR IT. Not because they want amateur ****, but because something about knowing that the woman in the film didn't consent to its distribution makes it more of a turn-on for them. It's on the same continuum as upskirt photos and voyeurs putting cameras in changing rooms at the low end, and rape at the high end. SO UNSPEAKABLY CREEPY.
P.S. - I so very much look forward to our legal system catching up with our technology, so that these idiots can be appropriately punished.
Dancing Fire|1367507067|3438751 said:She can play the same game too...Circe|1367505210|3438733 said:I'm actually really horrified this is A Thing - partially because of the creepy dudes who think, "Huh, so I got dumped ... know what'll make me feel better? Humiliating my ex!" but even more so because OTHER DUDES SPECIFICALLY LOOK FOR IT. Not because they want amateur ****, but because something about knowing that the woman in the film didn't consent to its distribution makes it more of a turn-on for them. It's on the same continuum as upskirt photos and voyeurs putting cameras in changing rooms at the low end, and rape at the high end. SO UNSPEAKABLY CREEPY.
P.S. - I so very much look forward to our legal system catching up with our technology, so that these idiots can be appropriately punished.![]()
Dancing Fire|1367476789|3438610 said:http://betabeat.com/tag/revenge-****/
TC1987|1367626336|3439923 said:Dancing Fire|1367476789|3438610 said:http://betabeat.com/tag/revenge-****/
Why are women so stupid. It is very simple to make sure this does not happen: If there are never any images created, there is nothing to be posted. And while you're at it, never put anything in writing, either. Always leave yourself a way to weasel out.
Why the Hades do all of today's young people have NO FILTER, NO BRAINS! Keep some things private and unattainable.
Circe|1367627896|3439946 said:TC1987|1367626336|3439923 said:Dancing Fire|1367476789|3438610 said:http://betabeat.com/tag/revenge-****/
Why are women so stupid. It is very simple to make sure this does not happen: If there are never any images created, there is nothing to be posted. And while you're at it, never put anything in writing, either. Always leave yourself a way to weasel out.
Why the Hades do all of today's young people have NO FILTER, NO BRAINS! Keep some things private and unattainable.
A lot of the time, they apparently don't know - in the age of the iPhone, it's awfully easy to post a surreptitious video.
And, even if they do participate ... even if it isn't the best judgement call ... dude, it's still the skeezy dudes doing this who are the ones at fault.
Dee*Jay|1367629311|3439968 said:Circe|1367627896|3439946 said:TC1987|1367626336|3439923 said:Dancing Fire|1367476789|3438610 said:http://betabeat.com/tag/revenge-****/
Why are women so stupid. It is very simple to make sure this does not happen: If there are never any images created, there is nothing to be posted. And while you're at it, never put anything in writing, either. Always leave yourself a way to weasel out.
Why the Hades do all of today's young people have NO FILTER, NO BRAINS! Keep some things private and unattainable.
A lot of the time, they apparently don't know - in the age of the iPhone, it's awfully easy to post a surreptitious video.
And, even if they do participate ... even if it isn't the best judgement call ... dude, it's still the skeezy dudes doing this who are the ones at fault.
I disagree on this point: If the man/woman* is a willing participant, he/she* absolutely shares the culpability. (*I'm using he/she sort of references here becuase I can easily see a woman posting this sort of thing).
Who among us with two brain cells to rub together can ever be 100% certain SOMETHING won't go wrong and nekked pics of your nekked parts won't wind up SOMEWHERE. Even if you're dealing with the love of your life (and vice versa), who's to say the phone won't get stolen or the cloud where all this stuff is stored won't be hacked? Your beloved may not do it, but that doesn't mean it can't be done. And seriously, any MORON (and yes, I just said MORON) who doesn't believe a relationship CAN go bad... well... I won't say "deserves" this, becaues I don't think anyone deserves this, but IT CAN HAPPEN. Pull your heads out of your cooches people and use a little common sense!
Circe|1367632934|3440010 said:Dee*Jay|1367629311|3439968 said:Circe|1367627896|3439946 said:TC1987|1367626336|3439923 said:Dancing Fire|1367476789|3438610 said:http://betabeat.com/tag/revenge-****/
Why are women so stupid. It is very simple to make sure this does not happen: If there are never any images created, there is nothing to be posted. And while you're at it, never put anything in writing, either. Always leave yourself a way to weasel out.
Why the Hades do all of today's young people have NO FILTER, NO BRAINS! Keep some things private and unattainable.
A lot of the time, they apparently don't know - in the age of the iPhone, it's awfully easy to post a surreptitious video.
And, even if they do participate ... even if it isn't the best judgement call ... dude, it's still the skeezy dudes doing this who are the ones at fault.
I disagree on this point: If the man/woman* is a willing participant, he/she* absolutely shares the culpability. (*I'm using he/she sort of references here becuase I can easily see a woman posting this sort of thing).
Who among us with two brain cells to rub together can ever be 100% certain SOMETHING won't go wrong and nekked pics of your nekked parts won't wind up SOMEWHERE. Even if you're dealing with the love of your life (and vice versa), who's to say the phone won't get stolen or the cloud where all this stuff is stored won't be hacked? Your beloved may not do it, but that doesn't mean it can't be done. And seriously, any MORON (and yes, I just said MORON) who doesn't believe a relationship CAN go bad... well... I won't say "deserves" this, becaues I don't think anyone deserves this, but IT CAN HAPPEN. Pull your heads out of your cooches people and use a little common sense!
I disagree. As I understand it, kids these days are using it as some weird measure of trust, which means its ridiculously easy for young men to make it some weird pre-condition ..."If you loooooooooooved me, etc."
The difference between somebody doing something like that out of love (or, "love," otherwise known as "hormones,") and somebody else posting it for public consumption to betray that love and deliberately humiliate the person they conned into trusting them ... night and day. No need to get victim-blame-y.
In an age when "boudoir" photos are popular ... it really does seem like it IS that element of non-consent that's the turn-on. You can find all the free **** you want on X-tube ... it's that extra soupcon on humiliation that makes the revenge **** sites as popular as they are. That says something massively gross about our society, and women being quick to blame other women for acting stupid, moronic, or like they've got their head up their cooch only reinforces it. Too many sexual abusers use the same exact phrases as the more conservative members of society - "she was asking for it," and "what was she wearing?" and so on.
Let's put the blame where it belongs - on the people who actually DO things wrong. Not the people who are their victims because they're too trusting, or in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Dee*Jay|1367633879|3440026 said:This is an interesting thing about "kids." That puts a whole 'nother spin on it for me. Certainly as a younger person (and I'm interpreting "kids" to mean teens? Or maybe JUST OUT of the teen age years for purposes of this discussion?) there are MANY things I would have done that I wound not in a million years even consider now. Part of my problem is that since I spend my entire professional life assessing and mitigating risk, I look at everything that way. I.e., the "what could go wrong" factoring. Now. But not when I was 13/17/21... hell, even beyond that! Thank god the technology we have now didn't exist then or I would likely be in a world of trouble!
And I do get your point about about males being more likely than girls to do this. BUT, I still think there are plenty of women (I'm going to make a generalization that I am just thinking through here) in the 20s range who would, out of anger/spite/whatever post pictures of Mr. No Longer Right. Especially if Mr. No Longer Right was not exactly Mr. Long, if you know what I mean!
Circe|1367634708|3440044 said:...
I teach 18 year olds (which may be why I veer towards the side of over-protectiveness) ... and a lot of the things they say about the current dating scene sends chills up my spine. I'm sure there are exceptions out there - but I'm teaching a bunch of privileged kids, and when they tell me there's no dating, just a lot of hanging out in groups before going off to do "whatever" together, frequently under the influence ... yeesh.
Circe|1367632934|3440010 said:I disagree. As I understand it, kids these days are using it as some weird measure of trust, which means its ridiculously easy for young men to make it some weird pre-condition ..."If you loooooooooooved me, etc."
The difference between somebody doing something like that out of love (or, "love," otherwise known as "hormones,") and somebody else posting it for public consumption to betray that love and deliberately humiliate the person they conned into trusting them ... night and day. No need to get victim-blame-y.
In an age when "boudoir" photos are popular ... it really does seem like it IS that element of non-consent that's the turn-on. You can find all the free **** you want on X-tube ... it's that extra soupcon on humiliation that makes the revenge **** sites as popular as they are. That says something massively gross about our society, and women being quick to blame other women for acting stupid, moronic, or like they've got their head up their cooch only reinforces it. Too many sexual abusers use the same exact phrases as the more conservative members of society - "she was asking for it," and "what was she wearing?" and so on.
Let's put the blame where it belongs - on the people who actually DO things wrong. Not the people who are their victims because they're too trusting, or in the wrong place at the wrong time.
TC1987|1367674779|3440205 said:As for the teens, don't their parents do any parenting? I blame the MTV shows and the rap music and the rest of the ghetto culture for devaluing the dignity of women and reducing the status of women to roughly that of livestock. But if women don't have the sense to say No, then they have to learn how to live with the consequences.
I do think that people who post other people's nude photos and videos without permission need to be outed and publicly identified, to warn other women.
I don't have any photos in wallet of anybody or things.smitcompton|1367686527|3440283 said:But, I bet DF carries a nude photo of Mrs DF in his wallet?
Annette