A hairy situation

[Mashira]

So, I am having a heck of a time trying to figure out what to do with my hair. I have very fine and very thin (meaning very little) hair. I was an idiot and used to bleach it when I was younger and it caused a lot of my hair to fall out. Then I had nutritional issues that caused more of it to fall out. I normally wear it straight but it has a bit of natural curl to it. It's pretty much grown in as much as it's going to, but I don't know what to do with it for the wedding, and I'm beginning to get concerned. I would love to do curls, but I'm afraid they would fall about two hours into the reception, and I would really like to do something other than just have it straight, especially since I will not have a veil. Bah! Any ideas? Anything at all?

Below are a few pics of my hair so yall can get an idea...

ETA: I think in the last picture you can see my scalp through my hair.... that's why I posted that one. It's VERY thin... it looks a lot thicker in pictures then it really is...

 

[Autumnovember]

Would extensions be a possibility for the wedding? I know a few people who have thin hair and got them for the wedding which allowed them to have more options in terms of styles.

 

[mrs.anthony2be]

If you do the extensions route: BE CAREFUL!
I am also a goof, who bleached, curled, dread locked (yes, DREAD LOCKED) and dyed my hair repeatedlly in my youth, and am also dealing with the consequences. I did a few different methods of extensions, so here's my .02.

Bonding: I found when it was time for them to come out I lost hair with the extensions.
Bonding glue: WAYYYYY MORESO! I felt like i lost 2/3 of my hair taking those out. hell. on. earth. just dont go there.
And clip ins, the problem I had with clip ins is that with thin, fine hair they are really hard to hide.

If I were you I would avoid it all together.

 

[Mashira]

My hair stylist told me it would be a bad idea to get extensions I had originally thought I would get them and everything would be just fine. However, for the reasons you outlined Mrs.Anthony2be, he said I probably should not do it. I think he knows what he's talking about because I would have to have a REALLY bad removal (meaning losing a lot more hair than I can afford to lose) for him to recommend I not get a $1500 procedure, because honestly I think he would want the revenue At least he's honest, I suppose!

I didn't know there were clip in extensions though... I'll have to look at that. I'm seriously considering a 'human hair' wig at this point, but to be honest that sort of freaks me out, and I wouldn't want it to look fake in the pictures

 

[mrs.anthony2be]

Clip ins will be tricky. Think like Jessica Simpson hair type thing, her clip in line. the clips are really hard to hide, and I have never really felt confident in them, because you always feel like a clip is showing, or its coming loose. And that is very un-sexy wedding day style, clip in hair extension on the dance floor, that it.
Another tip, if you straighten your hair right now, STOP. I stopped using heat on mine, and it is starting to fill out again. I was a heat junkie though, straightened almost every day. Now if I feel like doing anything with my hair I wear cold rollers to bed (Fi looks at me like I'm a crazy old bat, but it works!) , and when I wake up in the morning all I need to do is take out the rollers, and Voila, volume, curls, bouncy, pretty, full looking hair!

It's a tough situation, but things can be done. Another possibility is to avoid teasing your hair at all until the day of, and just let the stylist tease it to create volume. Also, if you plan an updo, you can get a "base piece" (I'm not sure what its actually called, its like a foam thing that sits around your ponytail holder), so you can add volume to the style that way and try some sort of bun with roll curls, like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hq8SgFFwi_g&feature=fvsr

(Obviously, this girl has a LOOOOT of hair, but I actually do this style quite often and it hides my lack of hair quite nicely!)

 

[mrs.anthony2be]

For reference:
1st style, just my own hair, done at home


2nd style: Has a base piece (foamy thinger)

As you can see, you can add A LOT of volume with just an extra little harmless add on!

 

[Mashira]

Thank you so much Mrs.Anthony2be!!! I will definitely talk to him about adding the foamy thing. Here are a few images of what I was hoping to go for...

 

[sillyberry]

I'm no wiz at hair (understatement of the century!), but since you already have a stylist that will be doing your hair for your wedding - talk to him!

Bring him your inspiration pictures and he'll have great suggestions and ideas about how to handle your particular hair issues to make your 'do look spectacular. That's his job!

 

[Mashira]

I completely agree Sillyberry... except for the hang up. I had him do a run through of one of the styles (eva) and just didn't look right. He suggested I do my hair down with curls... but I'm not too thrilled about that. I guess I'm just looking for something I may not know about (i.e. trying the foam inside the messy curls to give it volume) so that I can go with what I wanted originally. I'm actually really excited to try the foam... it think it should do the trick!

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Mashira, your inspiration photos were the exact same inspiration photos that I had!

I used clip in hair extensions in the back only that were then used to create the loose bun of curls. My own hair was used to create the fullness and body around my head.

I wouldn't feel comfortable using the clip ins to wear my hair down but it is very 'doable in an updo.

I also echo the sentiments that if you are straightening your hair at all to STOP!!!!! When I got engaged my hair was short, in a reverse bob and very heat damaged. I didn't use my irons for 9 months and was amazed at how fast it grew and how healthy it looked. Granted my hair was always in a pony tail and it got boring very fast but it was worth it to have my dream hair on my wedding day.

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Also, i love my hairdresser and think she is great but it took 2 trials to finally get it right the third time on my wedding day, if you think it is the look you want just keep trying till you get it right.

 

[Autumnovember]

There are some AMAZING clip in extensions (better than Jessica Simpson), I could get the name for you once I get back from class later if you're interested.

 

[sillyberry]

I completely agree Sillyberry... except for the hang up. I had him do a run through of one of the styles (eva) and just didn't look right. He suggested I do my hair down with curls... but I'm not too thrilled about that. I guess I'm just looking for something I may not know about (i.e. trying the foam inside the messy curls to give it volume) so that I can go with what I wanted originally. I'm actually really excited to try the foam... it think it should do the trick!

Gotcha...important wrinkle!

One more comment, then. A lot of people who cut hair just aren't cut out (no pun intended!) for wedding styling. If you think that's the case, you might consider looking for people in your city who specialize in wedding hair. Your question would be totally in their wheelhouse, they're used to making updos work on all kinds of hair, and since you don't have an ongoing relationship with them, you don't have to feel bad about harassing them into making it perfect!

 

[slg47]

I completely agree Sillyberry... except for the hang up. I had him do a run through of one of the styles (eva) and just didn't look right. He suggested I do my hair down with curls... but I'm not too thrilled about that. I guess I'm just looking for something I may not know about (i.e. trying the foam inside the messy curls to give it volume) so that I can go with what I wanted originally. I'm actually really excited to try the foam... it think it should do the trick!

Gotcha...important wrinkle!

One more comment, then. A lot of people who cut hair just aren't cut out (no pun intended!) for wedding styling. If you think that's the case, you might consider looking for people in your city who specialize in wedding hair. Your question would be totally in their wheelhouse, they're used to making updos work on all kinds of hair, and since you don't have an ongoing relationship with them, you don't have to feel bad about harassing them into making it perfect!

yep, this!

 

[rosetta]

Are you sure you can't get extensions?

I know there are places in London that do extensions that don't use any clips or bonding glue at all, they use a fine mesh that's braided into your own hair. They also use artificial hair, which is lighter than human hair, to avoid weighing down your own hair.

I have very similar hair to you mashira, and that's the kind of extensions I'm going for. Any chance you may have anything similar close to you?

 

[Laughinggravy0]

Mashira I just wanted to say... you are so beautiful... and although I hear you when you say the photos make it look thicker than it is, your hair looks lovely, esp in the last shot. I have dense thick wiry dry hair that I have to battle with constantly to avoid looking like I've stuck a finger in a socket, so your silky, black, flowing locks make me very envious

I know we all want what we don't have and of course you want something different for the wedding, so how about a bit of a radical suggestion (you can throw tomatoes at me)? How about a really cool shorter cut that really maxes out the benefit of poker straight hair.

I'm thinking of a gorgeous sexy sassy bob. You have lovely eyes and great bone structure, a swingy snazzy bob would look really great. And if you kept the idea a secret, and got a certain look going with the dress, people would be so wowed!!!!

Just and idea. Either way, you'll look gorgeous. But don't go the hair extension route.

 

[Laughinggravy0]

.... just to add, something like this. Or if you don't fancy cutting, this up do is lovely. I think both these looks are really elegant and it is nice to look a little different.
I'd say don't fight against the hair you have. Go with it and work it.

 

[yssie]

Love your inspiration pics Mashira!


My 2c - Trust in the Power of Goop in the Hands of a Pro. Can you do some trials with a few different people, see if one of them can create something you like without extensions/clip-ons/etc.? Those will damage your hair.


I have naturally thin, baby-fine hair like yours that I dyed for years (and probably damaged, at this point I can't tell!). My hair story:

My hair looked like this two months before the wedding- this is about an hour after I woke up, *after* I put it wet into a bun and slept on it for some 7 hours.




My wonderful stylist pulled this out of her hat for The Evening - and it actually mostly stayed in for the sixish hours!




After treating with this stuff for two months (slather it on, grab a shower cap and a book and sit for a couple of hours every weekend - helps to put it in the fridge for a bit first if you're in a hot place - or run it in hot water if it's cold, it's pretty runny at body temp) and no heat treaments/dyes/etc. - literally just wash, condition well, and airdry - may hair looks like this, finally what I wanted:

 

[Mashira]

ROFL!!! Yssie, my mom has been putting coconut oil in my hair since I was 5. She would force me to put it in, braid it, and then sit there in front of her so I wouldn't mess with it. I think it's a middle eastern thing I do still straighten about two times a week, but I am stopping. I think I will go ahead and start up on the coconut oil as well, as much as I hate the stuff... it works.

Laughinggravy *hugs* Awe, thank you! That was a nice little boost, I needed that today (went dress hunting.. no luck) I do like the updo pic, but I think FI would have a coronary if I cut off my hair :p It used to be in a bob and I've been growing it out for the wedding awesome suggestion though. I think I might even consider it if I lose my mind with trying to get this right.

Sillyberry, I agree. I think I do need to go somewhere else. Not so much because I don't think my guy is cut out for it, but more because I feel like I'm harassing him and I go there every month... I'd rather harass someone I'll never see again. Does that make me horrid? I dono..

Hawaiianorangetree, that's awesome! I'm hoping to go through a few friends and see who their sisters have used for wedding hair. (none of my friends are married).

 

[kagordo4]

Have you tried prenatal vitamins? They help everything: hair, nails, skin, etc, etc. Big ditto on the hair straightening. Stop, and stop blow drying. I would lightly pat dry.

But of course, check-with-your-doctor-before-starting-any-vitamin-therapy. : )

 

[yssie]

Hah! Yup, braids and gloop. Apparently Asian & Middle Eastern, and I'm guessing just as



You are so pretty and your hair is fine but I really think a stylist could get you exactly the look you're looking for. Good luck!

 

[Mashira]

Thank you Yssie, and thank you ladies! You've definately boosted my confidence in getting the hairstyle I want. I'm feeling much better. Thank you for all your help and suggestions!

Kagordo4, I've not tried prenatal vitamins. I've tried the 'hair skin nails' vitamin to no avail. I might give the prenatals a shot along with the no straightening and oil. The combo is bound to do some good!

On a completely different note, I just wanted to say I am a lot less stressed now as I just found out I got the job I interviewed for today and I'm super duper excited!!! (I took my licensing exam to be an RN on the 7th, found out I passed on the 9th, had my interview the 11th, and I start as the charge nurse on my Psychiatric floor the 24th! WooHoo!! It's just been a whirlwind week!)

 

[yssie]

Congrats!!

 

[Bleed Burnt Orange]

Thanks for posting this thread. You do have really pretty hair.

I've been self conscious and worried about my hair too and wondered exactly the same thing for my wedding day. I'm worried I won't be able to get too fancy, because of the front. The thing is...I don't dye, straighten, blow dry, or use products in my hair. It is LITERALLY just shampoo and conditioner. It may just be poor nutrition, not that I'm THAT unhealthy, and genetics.

Glad to have seen some tips posted here. I'm sure your hair will be beautiful on your wedding day, and your stylist would have worked wonders!

 

[Laughinggravy0]

Huge congrats on the job!!! You're going to look lovely so have fun playing around with goo but try not to let it stress you

 

[vc10um]

Congratulations on the job, Mashira!

And I think someone specializing in bridal hair might be just what the doctor ordered. Stylists spend most of their days cutting hair and doing blow-outs. While they may have learned how to do up-dos in school, they probably don't do them very frequently except for proms (eek! prom hair!) and the occasional wedding. A wedding stylist will not only spend much more of their time doing up-dos, but they'll more than likely be up to date with the current hair trends and know better how to style them.

Oh, and thanks for posting your inspiration pictures...I'm stealing the Eva Longoria for my inspiration, if you don't mind!

 

[Mashira]

Glad to know the post helped others! Steal away, no worries here I've officially locked up my straightener.... here goes nothing! And thank you all for the congrats on the job!!!