Not Lost but not found?

[Diamond_Hawk]

I have a good friend (male) who wears a silicone wedding band when he works out. I noticed him wearing it the other day at a semi-formal event and mentioned it to him. His response was, basically, "yeah, I'm not sure where I put my real band. I haven't seen it in about 6 months, but I'm sure it will turn up when I look for it."

This made me wonder:

#1 - anyone on PS also that cavalier about their wedding band

#2 - is this an inherently male quality, or are there females that would treat their wedding bands/ERings the same way?

 

[baby monster]

DH wears an inexpensive stainless WB because he doesn't want to lose an expensive ring. Sometimes he misplaces it and doesn't wear anything but then it turns up again. That doesn't bother me but I would be very upset if my 3ctw eternity WB was misplaced but the value is a bit more than his stainless band.

 

[AprilBaby]

My hubby lost his original ring and had to get a new one right away. Three years later it showed up in the bedroom on the carpet in the middle of the room. He was thrilled to get the original back. Most of my friends husbands don’t wear theirs anymore.

 

[JPie]

My husband didn’t think he would wear a wedding band, so we got him a cheap titanium band for the ceremony. To his own surprise, he did take to it and was quite upset when he thought he lost it once.

 

[OoohShiny]

My hubby lost his original ring and had to get a new one right away. Three years later it showed up in the bedroom on the carpet in the middle of the room. He was thrilled to get the original back. Most of my friends husbands don’t wear theirs anymore.

I am very cynical about ghosts and spiritual things generally... but sometimes things like this happen and it really does make me wonder if things go 'missing' and later reappear in blindingly obvious places due to the work of unseen hands! lol

 

[Ally T]

Neither my husband or I have ever removed our wedding rings. Superstition I suppose?! I think in the UK it’s just not really the done thing to remove them as they just don’t ever get upgraded or changed. It seems to be quite common here to have to have a band cut off in older age & I know some people choose to be buried with them. I have had to undergo 3 surgeries since we married, 2 were emergency sections, and each time the nurses taped over my band to protect it for getting hot under theatre lights. I was never asked to remove it. My husband owns absolutely NO jewellery at all, literally, apart from 2 pairs of cuff links & some watches. He made a big deal about his wedding ring, this being the only jewellery would own (watches aside) so had it custom made in heavy platinum. He paid £850 for it all in, back in 2007. And it’s lovely- it’s 6mm wide, heavy & flat with 3 grooves carved around the diameter. Tiffany make an identical ring, but he liked the idea of sitting with someone & making the whole thing really personal to him. Mine was custom made by the same chap & cost half the price.

So if either of us ever lost our wedding rings, I guess the other would be asking “why had you taken it off?” Ooh, I lie actually, as he had an MRI scan on a stress fracture in September & had to remove it, but he said he was obsessing about it until he was done & able to put it back on again

 

[Austina]

I wore my original wedding band for about 3 days. The fashion in 1978 was for wide bark finish rings and it rubbed my finger raw I took it off and haven’t worn it since, I’m not 100% sure where it is.

I didn’t wear a wedding ring until a couple of months ago when I got a 2mm platinum band to wear with Bella. DH wore his for several years, but probably hasn’t worn it for more than 30 years, I don’t think he knows where his is either.

We’re a pair of sentimental old fools aren’t we?

 

[MamaBee]

I am very cynical about ghosts and spiritual things generally... but sometimes things like this happen and it really does make me wonder if things go 'missing' and later reappear in blindingly obvious places due to the work of unseen hands! lol

We could start a thread on that! I’m very interested in this! Things have happened to me, my grandma, and one friend!

 

[missy]

My dh has many WBs and rotates between them depending on what he feels like wearing that day and also depending on what is attire is that day. The one we got married with is the most valuable and he wears that the least though. He loves the inexpensive titanium bands, tungsten bands, white gold bands etc. I'm OK with it. As long as he is wearing one band that is haha.

He lost one of the inexpensive bands once but it was OK because it wasn't the one that is more meaningful to both of us. The original band. I would be upset if he lost the original band.

Ironically I never wear my original WB because it no longer goes with my ER. The original WB is a shared prong diamond eternity band and I have not worn that since 2013 when I got my first OEC ER. Just doesn't look right. So in the safe it stays along with another shared prong band that I had made up from one of my ER resets. Took the diamonds from the shank of that reset and made another eternity band. Also unworn.

I have a number of bands that act as my WB depending on what I feel like wearing for the day. As long as I keep the same dh what does it matter which wedding band either of us wear? For us it doesn't matter at all.

My dh doesn't care at all what bling I wear as long as I am happy. I am not even sure he would mind if I decided to wear no ring. But know that yes I sure would mind if he didn't wear his WB.

 

[MaisOuiMadame]

Dh lost his wb two years after the wedding. It had always been too loose, he'd had it fixed where we originally purchased (Cartier), but they talked us into sizing it down 1/4 size less than what we originally thought was necessary....
Fast forward 2 years and we're all playing in a sandpit on a playground with our firstborn, when he suddenly notices that the band has fallen off in the sand. We searched the whole thing and had lots of little helpers who sifted through the sand, but no luck. Never found the band.
DH didn't want to buy a new ring, since he was super attached to the fact that we got married with that band.
A few years ago his dad found his own dad's wb in the vault and noticed that it was engraved with our wedding date 60years earlier. So he offered it to my dh and it fits him perfectly. He hasn't taken it off since.

 

[MamaBee]

We have our original wedding bands but mine had to be cut off when I was pregnant with my first..My fingers swelled up like sausages. At the time the design couldn’t be fixed so we bought new bands. I still have my wedding band that’s cut..

 

[lyra]

Well, my husband has many wedding rings actually. He made his own original one himself out of 14k yellow gold. Unfortunately, he outgrew it because it's a wide band. He has about 5 bands. I think he's a kindred spirit when it comes to jewelry. He always has a ring on, but he has a lot of options.

 

[MeowMeow]

My husband wears his all the time except for shower time as it was not purchased in quite the right size for him and when he comes out of the shower if he moves his hand wrong it flies off. He loves his ring and hates to be without it. We will probably get him a new one eventually.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

We both have specific places in our bathroom where we put our rings when we take them off, so we have never lost one. I wore my original rings for more than 25 years until I came to PS to look for a diamond for a new anniversary set. I was moving from yg to platinum. I still have my original set. My husband outgrew his original yg wedding band, and I bought him a temp tungsten band to wear as it can be worn anytime and not get scratched. Last anniversary, I gave him a new 18k gold one, but he wears that one when going out somewhere.

 

[jbake]

When we got married, my engagement ring was soldered to two pave wedding bands. So I also bought a 2mm half round band in white gold to wear when I didn’t want to wear diamonds. It wasn’t very expensive & there have been times on & off through the 8+ years I’ve had it where I wasn’t exactly sure where it was. Sure enough, it’s always turned up. I was never particularly concerned about it.

I couldn’t be nearly as cavalier with anything more expensive or more sentimental. I have a bracelet that is very dear, but not necessarily expensive. I have misplaced it a time or two. Usually knowing it was in one bag or another when I switched, but couldn’t rest easily until it was located.

 

[doberman]

My husband made our wedding rings. I still have mine, but he lost his soon after we got married. He was never comfortable wearing it, he was always taking it off and fiddling with it. I once found it tied to the fringe of a lap blanket. I knew it was only a matter of time before it would be gone for good.

 

[KaeKae]

I am very cynical about ghosts and spiritual things generally... but sometimes things like this happen and it really does make me wonder if things go 'missing' and later reappear in blindingly obvious places due to the work of unseen hands! lol

I've often wondered the same thing. But, then I tell myself it's more likely the thing was in a pocket, cuff, or something similar, OR maybe stuck in/under a piece of furniture, and was finally knocked loose, right into the middle of the room. A little less spooky when I go with that theory!

 

[vintageloves]

My husband is very responsible about wearing his plain, platinum band. On the other hand, I tend not to wear my rings at home and not always remember to put them on when rushing out the door. I'm not sentimental about them.

 

[Diamond_Hawk]

My hubby lost his original ring and had to get a new one right away. Three years later it showed up in the bedroom on the carpet in the middle of the room. He was thrilled to get the original back. Most of my friends husbands don’t wear theirs anymore.

This is also a growing trend that I have noticed.

 

[Diamond_Hawk]

I am very cynical about ghosts and spiritual things generally... but sometimes things like this happen and it really does make me wonder if things go 'missing' and later reappear in blindingly obvious places due to the work of unseen hands! lol

I hadn't even thought about that - wow.

 

[pearlsngems]

My H had to get his original wedding band cut off after an accident at work, as his hand swelled. He made himself another ring (he makes jewelry as a hobby) but doesn't wear it to work. He puts it on after he comes home, though, and always wears it when we go out. I think he likes having it on.

My original white gold band became too tight when my hands swelled while visiting my parents in FL (I was pregnant, and it was very hot.) I found a cheap aluminum band at a souvenir shop and wore it while there. After flying home, I bought a sterling silver band in a comfortable size. Even after my daughter was born, the original band was never so comfortable again, so over the years I have just worn plain silver "comfort shaped" bands.

Sometimes in winter my hands become excessively dry/itchy, and then I remove the band for a few days. I don't wear my engagement ring all the time.

I guess for me a wedding band isn't particularly sentimental-- it is a functional thing that signals that I am "taken".

 

[lyra]

As usual, my reading comprehension was a fail. I'm a bit ADHD. I wear something, anything, on my ring finger all the time. After 35 years, it feels wrong not to have a ring on. I have all manner of bands to choose from. I'm currently sporting a Pandora heart band, rose gold plated sterling, lol. I will admit though, the 2 rings I wear the most are currently too big for me, and sizing would require removing diamonds and honestly, I don't have a bench I trust, so I'm stuck wearing whatever fits best. Good set lives in the safe. I don't know why, it just does.

 

[whitewave]

DH has a cheap titanium one he never wears because he is a doc in a surgical speciality and so he doesn’t have time to take it on and off all day long— and it’s germy anyway.

It goes missing occasionally and we just figure it will turn up sooner or later. He usually wears it when we are on vacation or for special events.

 

[Diamond_Hawk]

DH has a cheap titanium one he never wears because he is a doc in a surgical speciality and so he doesn’t have time to take it on and off all day long— and it’s germy anyway.

It goes missing occasionally and we just figure it will turn up sooner or later. He usually wears it when we are on vacation or for special events.

This seems like a fairly common approach for married males.

 

[jaysonsmom]

My hubby is a biotech engineer, and he works out 5 days a week so he takes his band on and off a lot and puts it on his keychain etc. in any case he has lost 2 wedding bands. First one was a nice comfort fit platinum, very expensive. Second one was a cheap titanium one I got him as a replacement. He lost the second one 3 years ago, and has been ringless since.

I didn’t even know silicone bands existed until I saw this thread. When i mentioned that he would be able to work out etc wearing a silicone band, I was surprised to hear him say he saw some for sale at Dicks sporting goods and was thinking of getting one. I didn’t know that he felt “naked” without his band, all this time I thought that he would find it freeing because most of my married male friends don’t wear their wedding band!

 

[OoohShiny]

I hadn't even thought about that - wow.

I recall my good lady saying that a while ago now, her father had lost his driving licence and they had turned the house upside down looking for it - pulling all the drawers out, going through wardrobes and clothes pockets, etc.

One day he opened a kitchen drawer and it was there, laying on top of everything else in the drawer, despite that drawer being searched previously!

Weird... lol

 

[whitewave]

This seems like a fairly common approach for married males.

We’ve been together since we were 16. Believe me, he knows he is married lol.

 

[elizabethess]

I may be the odd duck. Per your example, I am semi-cavalier about my band and ER. Not for 6 months, more like 1 or 2 days. More of a 'hmm... where did I put that. I know I wore it home. Ah, well, it's around here somewhere.' Generally I take my jewelry off before bed and put it back on before I leave the house. But, some mornings are extra chaotic or pressed for time and if I've taken my rings off in a not-usual place (like if I tucked my ER away before making meatballs) I might not be prompted to put it on and that's how it starts.

I do feel a bit naked without it on, and I like wearing it as a cultural signifier, so it's not unimportant to me. Clearly I just have too much on my plate, am unskilled at juggling and need a personal assistant to help out (personal jewelry assistant? Is that a thing?)

 

[Karl_K]

I have no idea where my wedding band is at.
Haven't seen it in years.
My Wifey4vr probably knows where it is at.
I can not tolerate wearing anything on my fingers and told my bestest wifey4vr that before we got married and she is ok with it.

 

[Diamond_Hawk]

I may be the odd duck. Per your example, I am semi-cavalier about my band and ER. Not for 6 months, more like 1 or 2 days. More of a 'hmm... where did I put that. I know I wore it home. Ah, well, it's around here somewhere.' Generally I take my jewelry off before bed and put it back on before I leave the house. But, some mornings are extra chaotic or pressed for time and if I've taken my rings off in a not-usual place (like if I tucked my ER away before making meatballs) I might not be prompted to put it on and that's how it starts.

I do feel a bit naked without it on, and I like wearing it as a cultural signifier, so it's not unimportant to me. Clearly I just have too much on my plate, am unskilled at juggling and need a personal assistant to help out (personal jewelry assistant? Is that a thing?)

LOL - Personal Jewelry Assistant - I like that!

I know a lot of women who keep a small dish next to the sink for any kitchen work (using gloves even) and it sometimes gets 'left behind' there.