My god-daughter is going to university! Exhaaaaaaale....

[mrs-b]

I have a wonderful, sweet, ethical, beautiful, intelligent god-daughter, who is currently in her senior high school year. Which means that for the last 12 months we've been doing the 'application-hold breath-hope for the best-another application-hold breath' endless cycle! Her GPA took a hit last year when she got her first boyfriend, who we found out far too late was a manipulative creep and who went a long way towards wrecking her life. With as canny interventions as we could manage, combined with oceans of support and endless conversations, she was able to pull herself out of what had become a horrific situation, put her life back together, and get back on track academically and emotionally. But unfortunately, in the meantime, a lot of damage had been done, and her 4.0 GPA slipped to a 3.0. The girl who had been talking about vet science all her life had lost all confidence, and was now talking about community college, and we were freaking out.

My god daughter's parents divorced when she was 5, and my role in her life has been very large. When asked, she tells people that she has 3 parents, and she lists me on her FB page as her step mother, tho this is not legally accurate. For the purposes of school and so forth, I am listed as one of her legal guardians and to us, this is how our relationship feels. Watching her struggle, sink, struggle, and finally get her nose back above water over the last 12 months has been excruciating.

But today she received her first university acceptance - so she's definitely GOING TO COLLEGE! I'm sure it won't be the offer she accepts, but it's a solid school that would allow her to get a good education and make a life for herself of which she could be proud. I am SO RELIEVED, and I'm sure there's many PSers out there who also are going through this process and who are holding their breath, just like we have been.

So to all of you, best wishes for a great result - to you, and to your children, as the next part of their life journey unfolds.

And - to the extent that consideration for her privacy allows - this is my darling girl; well done, Baby!

 

[AV_]

Congratulations for the staggering achievement of your daughter!

I do know what the story could have been without you.

 

[eapj]

@mrs-b - no doubt she has done well because of your caring and influence. Congrats to her!

 

[JPie]

That is great news! Congratulations! Sounds like she has a very solid support network behind her, and I'm sure she will do very well.

 

[Matthews1127]

Congratulations!!! WTG!!!

 

[mrs-b]

Clearly I'm trying to teach her good habits. The ring she's wearing was one I bought on Loupe Troop for her, and had set by DKJ with a lovely little OEC I also bought. And the apricot pearls are from Pearl Paradise, via @yssie! They went to good use, Yssie - and look how lovely!

 

[MeowMeow]

Congratulations!!! I am happy for all of you! She is going to do awesome. It might take some getting used to though. I remember my first year was a bit of a culture shock. But after a couple terms I was consistently Dean's List and my GPA ended up pretty good.
I wish her good luck! I hope she gets into one of the schools she wants!

 

[MissGotRocks]

That's wonderful! Congrats to all of you!

 

[foxinsox]

How fantastic! Good for her - you and her parents must be so proud

 

[Bron357]

Well done young Miss
Well done “step” mum too.
She is now just stepping onto the life ladder and the world can be her oyster. Wherever she starts can lead to wherever she wants.
If you haven’t bought this book, please do. It’s a favourite of mine.
Dr Seuss “Oh, the places you’ll go”.
Wish me luck for next year, my Miss is doing her final year 2019 - gulp.

 

[Dandi]

Amazing news!! How absolutely blessed and fortunate she is to have you in her life.

 

[strawrose]

Congratulations! I’m glad she has your support through all of this.

 

[yssie]

CONGRATULATIONS to your daughter (in all the ways that count)!!!!

I’m so sorry to hear about her tumultuous year I wish I could go back in time and give you a very big ::HUG::

I think everyone has an experience like that at some point. At least one, at least once. Sometimes it’s heartbreak. Addiction. Debilitating fiscal irresponsibility. A traumatic event, losing someone precious...

And... we learn from them. They’re horrid, cruel teachers sometimes - the silver lining is of course that your beloved daughter knows that she’ll always have your support and love and trust and encouragement - and she knows that she can claw her way back from rock bottom and damn anyone who doesn’t believe in her - and THAT is something she should be so, SO proud of herself for!!!!!!

All admissions reps know that a GPA drop from 4 to 3 in a year tells a story. Some will value that story, and will recognize that a teenager figuring out how to put herself back together shows the sort of intelligence and strength that another teenager with that perfect 4.0 might never have. And those committees that don’t value her story, well, damn them and their loss. I know that’s easy to say; I’m glad she has her first acceptance letter as “proof” and I’m confident there are more to come!

And the pearls are perfect on her

 

[Queenie60]

Congrats. She'll receive more acceptances as well. Give it some time. I'm so happy for you -

 

[mrs-b]

Thanks, @MeowMeow, @AV_ , @eapj, @JPie, @Matthews1127, @MissGotRocks, @Dandi, @foxinsox, @Bron357, @strawrose, @yssie and @Queenie60!

It's been a really rough year for our precious girl, and she has absolutely clawed her way back. I can't share the story here for multiple reasons, not least of which her privacy, but suffice to say, it was much worse than just a 'bad boyfriend' scenario, and the damage far wider ranging. Our girl still suffers from panic attacks and it's possible she always will.

Yssie - I completely agree with you re admissions staff being able to interpret a sharp drop in grades - then a marked climb which, thankfully, there has been also. To be sure they understood - and also because it was true - she answered one of the questions on her college app (What is the hardest thing you've ever done?) by telling the story of what had happened to her and how she'd struggled out of that relationship to reclaim her life, and I'm hoping the admissions folks read this and get just some sort of idea how tough and how bright she really is. Most girls don't come back from what she did to sit their SATs and get admissions into good schools. We're so proud of her. <3

 

[HS4S_2]

Congratulations . That is fantastic and so very exciting! Good for her.

 

[Calliecake]

@mrs-b , I’m glad your god-daughter has her life back on track and has you in her corner. I am sorry for what she has been thru.

 

[Austina]

Well done!

 

[luv2sparkle]

Mrs-b, I am so happy for your girl, and so sorry she had to go through all of that. I hope, that in the long run, she will recover and be stronger for it. Not for the trauma, but for how hard she fought to come back. All of our girls need a strong female supporter and I am so glad it was you. Many congratulations to her and you,and I hope she will have a wonderful college experience and much success in the future.

 

[cmd2014]

The really great news is that she can still do veterinary college! If where you are is anywhere like here, you have to do 2 years of prerequisite coursework first (and often a 3 year degree) before you can apply. So she has time to pull back up and no-one will look at her high school transcript when evaluating her application to veterinary college. It also usually helps to have experience both in a vet clinic and with large animals (on a farm) in order to be attractive as a candidate.

So in the end it is soooo much better to have the dip in the road in High School than in college. And lots of life lessons come from that too which buffer you from similar things going forward. Wishing her the best of luck! So much of her life is still ahead of her!

 

[KaeKae]

So happy for her and you!
I remember that first acceptance, for each of my girls, so well. I said exactly what you said: "you are going to college!!!"
And, so, your girl will start fresh next fall. I wish her the very best going forward.

 

[monarch64]

Such a great success story in progress! Happy to hear this young woman is finding her way in the world and has so much support.

 

[missy]

Congratulations to your GD @mrs-b. So thrilled for you both and wishing her happiness and success.

 

[lambskin]

Congrats! The best college is one that she will be happy at. Once she starts college it will be a clean slate (no more disclosure of high school grades) and she can go on and lead a wonderful life.

 

[sparlie]

Congratulations, and how wonderful for you both to have each other in your lives.

 

[MamaBee]

Congratulations mrs-b! She looks like such a sweet girl. I’m sure your influence and support helped pull her out of what could have been a definite bump in her life..A great support system with people that loved her was what gave her the strength to smooth that bump out again. She is lucky to have you..

 

[mrs-b]

Thank you, @HS4S_2 - we're very excited!

Hi @Calliecake. All her life I've told this girl "It's my intention to be the best friend you'll ever have" - and I've set that bar for myself in regards to her and her brother, and it's a standard I've lived to.

Thanks, @Austina!

 

[mrs-b]

@luv2sparkle - so much of what went on was about her strength as a woman - losing it, then finding it in much greater measure. Even tho she was very young, she had her own #MeToo experience, and while it destroyed us all that we were unable to keep it away from her, it's been our commitment to do all we can to help her regain her life and to show her that she does have power and control, and she's able to choose her own destiny.

Thank you for being so encouraging, @cmd2014. Her GPA has climbed back to 3.6, and we're hoping that the plummet from 4.0 to 3.0, and now the gutsy climb back to 3.6 is clear to the admissions folks as a blip. Academically, we're looking forward to putting this all behind us as much as we can, tho there is a great deal in all of this of which she can be proud.

@KaeKae, her brother, my godson, is at UC San Diego, and I remember the pride and the tension as the offers came in day by day. We're so relieved to see both of them successfully 'launched' - tho I have to say, *she* might think she's launched, but I know I'll always have an invisible emotional 'string' tied from her little finger to mine.

 

[luv2sparkle]

@mrs-b, I have found this whole #MeToo cultural experience to be very interesting (to put it mildly). I wonder how many women from our generation had these experiences? I have quite a few in my life, some much more traumatic than others, most never even talked about, even to my husband. I hope that putting a name to it, and connecting to other women provides greater healing to these younger women, than our generation had. These hurts and traumas no longer hide in the darkness, they have a name and a weird sorority of women who call them out. How strange, that it never even occurred to me to talk about them, that I didn't feel the sense of outrage that young women have. I just accepted it as part of life. Oh, how I hope that changes permanently.

 

[mrs-b]

Thanks, @monarch64 She really is finding her path and we're watching with fascination to see where her life will take her!

@missy - thank you so much! She is a unique and special girl with a warm heart and a quirky sense of humor, and her happiness is our happiness.

@lambskin - agreed! We're searching for the right college - not just *a* college. Which, of course, is what makes it so hard....