Small beach wedding

[merilenda]

After being engaged since last June and not doing even a bit of planning, we're decided it's probably time to start figuring things out! I am not a planner by nature, and I can use all the help I can get. I actually hesitated on posting this, because my thoughts are kind of jumbled, but I'll give it a try.

First of all, we want to do a small destination wedding. I'm talking 10-15 people tops. Just close family and friends. We've considered about every possible location, and I think I'm starting to drive FI nuts with my new ideas every day. We've talked about Vegas (among other locales) but I really think I want to do a small beach wedding - FI isn't picky about location as long as his parents and a few close friends are there. He just wants me to make up my indecisive mind, I think.

We had originally discussed getting married in June of of this year. But due to our procrastination, we're re-considering and tending more toward early September now. We're moving from the midwest to PA in August, so that's not a good month. However, we're very flexible on day of the week, time of day, etc.

I've spent a good part of the day surfing the net looking at various ideas and I was wondering if BWW could help out with some ideas for what we want to do. We're paying for the wedding ourselves and are very budget-conscious. I'm really thinking that Florida may be a great option for us, as there are many beautiful beaches and our guests would not have to worry about traveling internationally. My family has took several trips to St. Augustine when I was younger, and we really loved it. FI and I went to the Clearwater/St. Pete area a couple years ago, so west FL has a bit of personal draw to us as well.

I know that time of year is during hurricane season, right? I'm wondering how big of an issue that could be.

Also...I'm not sure we want to do an actual reception. Maybe just a private room for dinner for our small party? No dance floor or anything needed. It seems like you add the word "wedding" to anything, and it's an immediate increase in cost. Do you think we actually need to purchase a reception package sort of thing? Or could we rent a room and just pay for everyone's dinners? I'm a little confused on how it works.

Since I still feel pretty lost and clueless in all this, I guess I'm mostly asking for guidance. Am I headed in the right direction? What should I do next? Do you have a great idea on a location? Any suggestions and tips are appreciated.

 

[sillyberry]

Yeah for jumping on the planning bandwagon!

I think for a beach wedding in September, you definitely want to be concerned about hurricanes. I'm afraid I can't be too helpful about where to suggest though for places that usually don't get hit. I used to be under the impression that the gulf side was better than ocean side, but I'm not sure that's actually true!

But for things I can help with - you definitely don't have to do a wedding package. Once you narrow down your location options to one or two locales, I would start to search for restaurants with private rooms. Perhaps you want something overlooking the water or with another particular feature. A lot of private rooms don't have rental fees so long as you spend a certain amount in food and beverage. You could do a set limited menu, either plated or family style, or have everyone just order off the menu. Another way to save money would be to do a morning ceremony and brunch/luncheon. The prices are generally less for lunch to begin with, and that way you also avoid some of the trappings of "wedding!" if that's not your jam.

Good luck!

 

[merilenda]

Thanks, sillyberry! I know I'll definitely ask about weather back-up plans in choosing a location. My family always had kind of bad luck with hurricanes while vacationing there, but then, we usually took our trips in August. I'm definitely interested to hear input on this, especially from anyone local.

I'm not set on Florida necessarily - I was also looking up places in NC or maybe even Maine. I just know FL has a lot of great beaches, and I think it would make a nice trip for our family and friends who come along.

 

[Jessie702]

You should want to eb concerned about hurricanes, so maybe take a look at what MIGHT be predicted for the season. Also, it depends on what side of florida you want to get married. If you are looking at the gulf side, i would suggest Naples area. Very pretty and a lot of options. If you want something a little more east, you can always pick the hollywood area, or dayton. Dayton would be a bit more busy, or you can always go with Miami, or the Keys. If you wanted to do a key island that is closer to Miami, not really a long drive surrounded by water, you can go with Key Biscayne. VERY, VERY Pretty, and a few different options. Also, there are some resturants in that area, or possible the Coral Gables area.

Also, i dont think you would have to do a reception package, since you are only having maybe 15 people, and you dont want dancing. Im sure you could rent a private area, and just pay for everyones dinner. Nice thing, is people have choices of picking what they want, downside, this option might get a bit pricey, depending on your guests tastes in food. If you want a nice good steak house in the Ft. Lauderdale/Hollywood area, i LOVE Chucks Steakhouse....Was soo good, hehe, and it just happens to be the FI's name.

Hope that helps....ill ask the FI if he knows of any good areas, he is orginally from Miami. Good Luck

 

[katamari]

Not to be a naysayer, but here's my naysay:

DH and I moved cross country in August of last year. It was so incredibly taxing and stressful. We had some of the most epic fights in our relationship just because it was was such a high-stress time. Our original plan was to get married the year we moved and frequently talk about how glad we were we didn't because it was so terrible. We also canceled our vacation plans for December of last year just because things had just started to calm down from the relocation/new jobs and we just wanted some time to chill. If we would have had to get married in early September, we would have done it, but there is no way we would have enjoyed it.

What about waiting until December or January and going somewhere in the Caribbean? You will be fully sick of the PA weather and it will be nice to get away. My guess is that it isn't that much more expensive than Florida. Even the Keys, I believe, are nice in December/January. Plus, going off season will make it cheaper than going in early September anyways.

 

[Seattle SC]

Just thought I'd chime in since I literally just got back from a beach wedding in Maui 2 days ago. Basically the bride contacted a pastor and a planner in the area, and they had everything good to go once we arrived - flowers, ukalele (sp) player, etc. It was a sunset wedding with only 12 people in the entire party (including B&G). Afterwards we went up to the hotel that the beach was on and had dinner in one of the restaurants, where we could order off the regular menu and B&G took care of it (they made sure the servers knew that alcohol was on us though - no issues with that either). It wasn't in a private room and there were no minimums required, but it was a beautiful location and felt secluded since we were all seated at a square table together. When we looked at a few other reception locations, we found that private rooms typically had minimums for food and drink and it was more economical if you sat in the regular seating, provided they had tables that could seat your whole party.

I'm not familiar with hurricane season on the East Coast so I can't add much there, but would readily suggest Maui since the weather was amazing and nobody needs a passport to get there. The other nice part was I had a nice vacation for a few days, and B&G got their honeymoon as well (they're staying an extra week, now that everyone's gone).

Hope that somewhat helps about some of the process. Btw - we didn't figure out the reception site until 2 days before the wedding. We drove around to a few locations before they decided what they finally wanted.

 

[mrswahs]

Just thought I'd chime in since I literally just got back from a beach wedding in Maui 2 days ago. Basically the bride contacted a pastor and a planner in the area, and they had everything good to go once we arrived - flowers, ukalele (sp) player, etc. It was a sunset wedding with only 12 people in the entire party (including B&G). Afterwards we went up to the hotel that the beach was on and had dinner in one of the restaurants, where we could order off the regular menu and B&G took care of it (they made sure the servers knew that alcohol was on us though - no issues with that either). It wasn't in a private room and there were no minimums required, but it was a beautiful location and felt secluded since we were all seated at a square table together. When we looked at a few other reception locations, we found that private rooms typically had minimums for food and drink and it was more economical if you sat in the regular seating, provided they had tables that could seat your whole party.

I'm not familiar with hurricane season on the East Coast so I can't add much there, but would readily suggest Maui since the weather was amazing and nobody needs a passport to get there. The other nice part was I had a nice vacation for a few days, and B&G got their honeymoon as well (they're staying an extra week, now that everyone's gone).

Hope that somewhat helps about some of the process. Btw - we didn't figure out the reception site until 2 days before the wedding. We drove around to a few locations before they decided what they finally wanted.

To echo what Seattle SC said, I would like to recommend Maui. We're getting maui'd in October and we're having a small beach wedding on Makena Beach with 7 guests. It cost about $1800 per couple for flight from Baltimore, hotel and car rental. The wedding part cost $550. Literally. That's it. That covers the beach permit fee, the officiant's fee, a bouquet, my hair & makeup, a keepsake wedding certificate, etc. It is amazing. We hired a wedding coordinator and everything has already been taken care of. It's been so easy. It was actually really cost-effective and we get to have the wedding of our dreams in paradise.

FI's dad couldn't afford it so we paid his way, but the cost really isn't bad!

 

[merilenda]

Thanks for the suggestions! We're definitely open, so keep them coming! I'm not going to lie - the idea of Maui sounds wonderful. The main concern would probably be the cost. I'm not sure a lot of our guests would be able to afford it, and I was thinking east coast would be more financially feasible. We're not really in the position to cover anyone's travel expenses right now either. I know we need to plan the wedding based on us and not everyone else, but I also don't want to put my closest friends in a situation of paying for a trip they can't afford or not being able to go. I'm definitely going to look into it though.

Katamari - I think we'll probably end up honeymooning in December/January. I really don't want to get married at that time of year, however. Between Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, both our birthdays, and the birthdays of many close family members all the in the span of one month, that time of year is extremely stressful for us. I really don't want to add another event on there (maybe it sounds dumb, but as someone with a Christmas birthday, I also don't want to celebrate our anniversary every year at that time).

I'm crossing my fingers that this move will be relatively stress-free. His new job is paying for it and coordinating. In the 3 years we've lived together, this is also our 4th move...if you count moving in together originally as a move. If you don't, it's our 3rd move. While obviously we don't enjoy moving, we've always gotten through them pretty well. Under stressful circumstances, too - last summer, we had both finished our graduate degrees in May and had nowhere to live when our lease was up on July 31st. We ended up putting our stuff into storage, staying with friends for a few weeks, and then moving to a new city when I accepted a job. I am 99% sure this move will not be as bad as that.

 

[mrswahs]

Thanks for the suggestions! We're definitely open, so keep them coming! I'm not going to lie - the idea of Maui sounds wonderful. The main concern would probably be the cost. I'm not sure a lot of our guests would be able to afford it, and I was thinking east coast would be more financially feasible. We're not really in the position to cover anyone's travel expenses right now either. I know we need to plan the wedding based on us and not everyone else, but I also don't want to put my closest friends in a situation of paying for a trip they can't afford or not being able to go. I'm definitely going to look into it though.

Just as an addition: People who we haven't talked to in ages (i.e. my childhood best friend who I haven't seen since she moved away when we were 3) are trying to come to Maui for our wedding. Everyone loves an excuse to go to Hawaii Seriously though, we have had to turn down people that we aren't terribly close to and tell them they can't come. We need to keep it to parents only because as soon as we start opening up the guest list we start alienating family members who aren't physically well enough to come and that's not fair. (Like how my paternal grandmother is well enough, but my maternal grandparents aren't, and neither is FI's grandmother, so we just aren't inviting any of them to keep them all from feeling hurt)

I'm not sure how this fits with your vision, but you could always have those who can come to the DW, come to that, and those who can't join you when you get home for a celebration. We're going to have a large party when we return for everyone who isn't coming to Hawaii.

 

[amc80]

Have you thought about a cruise wedding? They are pretty inexpensive as far as weddings go. You can organize a reception for the cruise line or even pay the per-head fee at a specialty restaurant on board (usually $30).

 

[aileron]

I hope you're still checking this thread. How about one of the communities along 30-A in Florida (http://www.sowal.com/towns)?

http://www.sowal.com/wedding-guide

It is a beautiful area.