Yesterday cancer took our Melanie

[redwood66]

I'm so sorry @Daisys and Diamonds. Your whole family is in my prayers.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

the owner od our work is just a young couple (with a lot of kids)
they are a lovelly couple and their kids are awsome
their special needs boy had a brain bleed today
it just seems so unfair

 

[TooPatient]

I have been trying to come up with words since I read your post and came back and read through all of your updates. There aren't any. It isn't fair. Cancer just sucks and she was too young for that. Thinking of you and Gary and the rest of the family.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

thank you too patient, red, Demon and Begonia
i honestly appreate you all here on this thread

on the funny side its the day befote the funeral and Gary has no good pants that fit
lucky we found a suit hire place not far away on our side of the river
it was kinda nice going out witj a purpose
the lady was the same age as Melanie

i also rung the undertaker to sus out the flower situation and it seemed ok to send some to the service

i stumbled upon the florist who was doing her flowers any way (small town)

our house is a mess, i have been very slack and just havnt felt like housework
we have clean clothes and towels - surely that counts for something

 

[Wink]

My heart aches for your loss. Still, as I read this thread, I laughed out loud at your comment on burning the toast being a touch of normalcy. It's a touch past 5 AM here, and my heart was relieved to hear the humor in your sad voice.

Having lost my father to prostate cancer, I encourage you to be sure that Gary follows up quickly on the results of his blood test.

Be strong for those around you who are also struggling, and know that your many friends here on Pricescope are thinking about you with concern in their hearts too.

Wink

 

[kgizo]

I am so sorry for your loss, Daisys and Diamonds. Sending a hug across the ocean to you and Gary.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

My heart aches for your loss. Still, as I read this thread, I laughed out loud at your comment on burning the toast being a touch of normalcy. It's a touch past 5 AM here, and my heart was relieved to hear the humor in your sad voice.

Having lost my father to prostate cancer, I encourage you to be sure that Gary follows up quickly on the results of his blood test.

Be strong for those around you who are also struggling, and know that your many friends here on Pricescope are thinking about you with concern in their hearts too.

Wink

thank you Wink
prostate cancer has taken way too many dads
we are off to see the specialist on Tuesday, i forgot Gary had also had a scan around the same time as the blood test
im very nevouse with the looming covid tsunami possibly about to break up overwelming the health system but somehow we have to stay positive

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

today was the funneral
got up about 5.45
took me 15 precious minutes to find the skirt i wanted to wear - still waiting for the half slip to arrive (lucky today was overcast )
had so much trouble with shoes last night just desided to buy a new pair of sketches from the mall before the service
lucky we did because i was sure my shirt was clean on but i discovered unidentified dribble on it
maybe it was cat puke ? because we had one of those mornings
just as we were leaving i discovered a pile of cat kibble puke on a stack of Bruce Springsteen stuff
anyway also had to buy a new shirt in about 55 seconds !

Then had suchi for breakfast because i have no idea what happened to Maccas in that mall ???
i gotta say suchi tastes amazing eatten that fresh

got to the funeral directors, mostly just family and close freinds and her boss
65 in the chappel
Kaleb came up right off and gave me a hug
we last saw him about March but we bearly recognised him, he's shot thriugh the roof
what a wonderful young man his mum and dad have been raising
he had 3 mates from school there
little Kiera had her gaggle of freinds join us latter at the cemetry
it was actually a prerry good service, not religious but plenty of hope for what ever comes next
my brother in law speaks at all the funerals in Gary's family, he's very good, this is the first time ive seen him loose it but his son, Melanie's food in came up and gave him a hug

the sad thing with covid - and honestly i feel quite distraught for every bereaved family every where in the world who has had to plan funneral with covid rules
a lot of her freinds and workmates had to just skype and no one else in the family was confident they could get up and talk without crying

Dylon's mum said a poem but she told us afterwards she was only able you hold it together by just reading the poem word for word and that was all

we had lots of Pink Floyd but of course no singing
her boss spoke so wonderfully of Melanie, we had no idea quite so well she had done at work
i felt sad for her work makes back at the office but they were having drinks with the Skype and were together

our flowers matched the wrath on her coffin which was one of those modern new age things that people can write all over
but i think writting something was beyound poor Gary today, i had to write for us in the memorial book - i have the worst handwritting of anyone but Gary asked me to do it for him

the two kids were amazing
so much more than my sister and i had been but funerals have changed an awful lot in that time and i think its a lot more kid freindly
when their dad got up to speak the kids were crying and becsuse of covid the chairs were spaced out but Dylon's best freind has been staying with them and he came and hugged little Kiera

the kids just dressed casually and i think that helped a lot
we had a toddler - Gary's great nephew from down south and he was great entertainment for everyone the whole day
the ladies of the family carried her out to the hearse to Floyd's wish you were here
Gary's sister had had the idea it would be nice for Melanie's cousins to do it but her aunties and their cousins kind of misunderstood and volunteered
they had lavender rather than rosemary for us to place on the coffin - Melanie had been able to plan quite a bit herself and then her mum had stepped up to help Dylon when it got too hard this week
i can't remember the songs as the photos played - ...on the turning away (more Floyd) but there should have been many more representing many many more years of life than she got

Melanie's SIL - Aaron's partner of many years reaked of wine (at 10am) she has surposed to have given up for the health of her liver - Aaron gave up just to help her
sigh
she did not look good (not drunk just really really unwell) - poor Aaron, everyone is cr*pping out all around him

anyway while Mel was getting to the hearse the staff were really working hard and had the cups of tea and savories, sammies and cake out

there were 65 at the service and they ticked our name off as we came in
i think the maximum allowed is 100
the family kind of spread out in the first room and everyone else spaced out in the room behind

i thought people would put masks on but no one did

amyway (sorry to go on)
so after a leisurely morning tea (you had to eat sitting down) it was off to the cemetry

ive only been to this bit once before
i refused to go when it was my dad because i didn't want to see him going into the cold hard dirt

anyway its not used much this cemetry, so its very rural looking, with lots of beautiful trees and countrywide
but in Melanie's row was lots of very young children and babies - OMG some families had lost multible little ones

so it was the men's turn to be pal bearers but Gary choose not to as he was worried he just wouldnt have the strength required and Kakeb was able to

anyway - so this isnt something my family do - but after the ceremonial hand fulls of dirt the family shoveled the dirt back in themselves (there was a perfect good council truck with a digger discretely parked up the drive a bit)
Oh now its Stairway to heaven btw
Dylon gave the first shovel full to Gary

i felt so sorry for Mel's mum

so there were lots more people at the cemetry than im sure is ever nornal in NZ - and the families of Kiera's wee freinds and lots of other freinds who wouldn't have fitted into the chappel becsuse of the covid spacing

it took ages as the sun came out and it got hot and everyone over 35 said their legs/backs/ feet ached but i think people really wanted to do it and be there

Gary and I hung back not wanting to look in the hole
her mum was crying


anyway someone should have thoughts this through (hindsight is indeed a wonderful thing) and we should have had camping chairs and sat out with drinks in the sun ..
but it is a cemetry
so then Sue (the alcoholic one) had a bit of a wobble and had to go sit down in their car, her poor legs dont like standing in the sun

im a little worried no one wore a mask but hopefully we will all be ok
most everyone was double vaxed and there is no covid in any of the places we all travelled from for today
and of course everyone was hugging and touching

so then everyone broke of into groups for what ever 'after match function' (again stupid covid) they were off too next
we just came home

its been a long day
work tomorrow


i wore Gary's mum's earings and mum's braclete and my grandma's ER etc so it felt like they were all there with me

Gary is having a snore, we might just have toast or something really light when he wakes up

sorry for the long rambling post and no doubt 100s of typos

 

[CMN]

I’m thinking of you and your family @Daisys and Diamonds.

 

[Missy]

@Daisys and Diamonds I am holding you and your family in my thoughts Nicky. Gentle hugs.

 

[Wink]

sorry for the long rambling post and no doubt 100s of typos

It was a great ramble to read. Thank you for the interesting share of a sad event.

Wink

 

[maita13]

I hope this brings just a hint of a smile for you today, @Daisys and Diamonds …

Pete Souza on Instagram: "Seven days before the end of the Obama administration, Bruce Springsteen gave a solo performance in the East Room of the White House. The attendees were those of us who had served all eight years (plus one guest). I sat in t

41K likes, 325 comments - petesouza on October 29, 2021: "Seven days before the end of the Obama administration, Bruce Springsteen gave a solo performance in the East Room of the White House. The attendees were those of us who had served all eight years (plus one guest). I sat in the front row...

www.instagram.com

 

[maita13]

In case you don’t have an IG account, this is what I wanted you to see, @Daisys and Diamonds …

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

In case you don’t have an IG account, this is what I wanted you to see, @Daisys and Diamonds …

That's a great pboto
I hope its in his book !

One thing i was thinking when it was taking ages for all the dirt to go back in the hole at the cemetry was that this is a great way to make people listen to the music you like !

 

[maita13]

That's a great pboto
I hope its in his book !

One thing i was thinking when it was taking ages for all the dirt to go back in the hole at the cemetry was that this is a great way to make people listen to the music you like !

It never is easy for those who are left behind, @Daisys and Diamonds … tight hugs to you

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

It never is easy for those who are left behind, @Daisys and Diamonds … tight hugs to you

Yip
Its hard
i keep trying to focus on her own little family but yesterday as i was doing the dishes at work i kept thinking about never seeing Melanie again
even at her funeral i caught myself in the carpark looking around for her, becsuse everyone else was there

 

[monarch64]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I just read your account of the funeral and you’re so good at relaying details. Write a book, please. Lots of hugs @Daisys and Diamonds

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I just read your account of the funeral and you’re so good at relaying details. Write a book, please. Lots of hugs @Daisys and Diamonds

Thank you, monatch64 that's very kind of you

 

[Garnetgirl]

Dear @Daisys and Diamonds
I am so sorry for your and Gary’s loss and for all that you’ve been through. Reading through your account of the funeral, I wish I could have been there to give you a hug.
My sincere sympathies from across the miles