DF and I are having our engagement party in 6 weeks (yay!). It will be fairly big for us (100+ people) as all our friends and the entire family are invited as we are eloping and want to give everyone a chance to celebrate with us at least at the e-party.
Anyway, in 12 years we have collected just about everything we need for a house (and more!), so we don''t really need presents. We have made it clear to our friends/family that presents are not necessary although people are insistent on bringing gifts - I suppose I understand this, there is no way I would attend an e=party without a gift of some sort but i honestly don''t expect it back. I think some people are more insistent on giving a gift as they won''t have an opportunity at the wedding etc.
So, DF and I would really love a new BBQ and outdoor furniture - they are the two things on our ''dream list'' that we will get eventually after the wedding etc (or when we win the lottery). We were going to tell our parents that if anyone asked us what we wanted, we would be grateful if they contributed to these items by way of a voucher to that store if they wanted, but only as a suggestion, we have told the Mum''s to again reiterate the no need for a pressie thing.
One neighbour suggested a wishing well - where people can contribute cash or vouchers in a card or annon, whatever they feel, or can give a gift if they really want to.
What are your thoughts on this. I feel really uncomfortable about the whole present thing, we are honestly just happy to have a big party, but I know some people really want gift ideas, but then we don''t want to put pressure on people to give cash or vouchers, and I like the idea of a wishing well so they can give something without leaving their name, or they can even chose not to give a gift and not feel bad about it, as we won''t know who has contributed or not.
Am I overthinking this? Do you think having a wishing well would make people feel they had to contribute, when we want the total opposite - we want our guests to feel comfortable.
Anyway, in 12 years we have collected just about everything we need for a house (and more!), so we don''t really need presents. We have made it clear to our friends/family that presents are not necessary although people are insistent on bringing gifts - I suppose I understand this, there is no way I would attend an e=party without a gift of some sort but i honestly don''t expect it back. I think some people are more insistent on giving a gift as they won''t have an opportunity at the wedding etc.
So, DF and I would really love a new BBQ and outdoor furniture - they are the two things on our ''dream list'' that we will get eventually after the wedding etc (or when we win the lottery). We were going to tell our parents that if anyone asked us what we wanted, we would be grateful if they contributed to these items by way of a voucher to that store if they wanted, but only as a suggestion, we have told the Mum''s to again reiterate the no need for a pressie thing.
One neighbour suggested a wishing well - where people can contribute cash or vouchers in a card or annon, whatever they feel, or can give a gift if they really want to.
What are your thoughts on this. I feel really uncomfortable about the whole present thing, we are honestly just happy to have a big party, but I know some people really want gift ideas, but then we don''t want to put pressure on people to give cash or vouchers, and I like the idea of a wishing well so they can give something without leaving their name, or they can even chose not to give a gift and not feel bad about it, as we won''t know who has contributed or not.
Am I overthinking this? Do you think having a wishing well would make people feel they had to contribute, when we want the total opposite - we want our guests to feel comfortable.
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