Wedding What not to wear to a wedding...

[CJ2008]

Date: 8/23/2008 12:47:41 PM
Author: violet02

Date: 8/23/2008 12:36:06 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 8/23/2008 11:58:33 AM
Author: violet02
I was at a formal wedding last june... as in the groom wore tux and tails! Anyways since it was during the day and outdoors for some reason people took that to mean summer clothing. Some of us were dressed to the nines... some folks were in sun dresses and sandals... some in jeans and short sleeves! Maybe it''s the type of folks he invited (the laid back burning man folks)? I don''t know really but I almost wore a sun dress and heels because of when/where it was. My friend told me ahead of time to go formal though so I changed my outfit.


My wedding is at 2:30pm outdoors on a lawn by the house we rented. I live in fear of the casual dressers that may show up. I don''t know how to tell people to be semi-formal though without sounding like a control freak!


ETA: And call me old fashioned but it would bug me if someone wore white to my wedding. My step-bro''s gf is wearing black and white and that''s fine by me, but all white or some variation of that? no way.

Oh, no! The groom actually made the biggest faux pas of them all if he wore full tails to a daytime wedding! Full tails (and black tuxedos) are only to be worn to evening events. Daytime events require a dark gray tux, perhaps with stripes, and the closest things to tails one can wear in the daytime is a cutaway coat. Oh, boy.

I can''t believe a rental place would allow a groom to rent tails for his own daytime wedding. How embarrassing!

Welll... let me add some details to the story here. The reception was at night and went til 11pm at a hall they rented. They''re big 40''s style swing dancers as well. AND he knew he was overdoing it, he wore a top hat too! hehe. He actually had the suit made for him by this amazing tailor in SF (I had the same tailor do some ties and a vest for my wedding).

I think he just wanted everyone to dress up just because he was... he''s a bit eccentric as well.

That wedding was all over the map in terms of what to do and what not to do... like asking for formal attire but serving beer and pizza... no wedding cake either it was ice cream and cookies. It was super fun though!

I think that''s great. Even though it''s not what I would choose to do for my own wedding I love when I see people doing whatever they want. It''s fun when the rules are clearly being broken.

 

[Pandora II]

English weddings are pretty much always all-day.

Appropriate dress here for men is a Morning Suit, which is appropriate for wearing all day and in the evening. You can get away with a Frock coat, but it would be a little unusual. Dress Kilts are also appropriate.

No-one in the UK would wear a tuxedo to a wedding as you wear them to formal Dinners, Balls etc, but I have seen it a lot in the rest of Europe

Here's some of my favourite hats....

Sadly I've worn this one twice now, so I have to get a new one.

 

[Pandora II]

I don''t have a close-up of the hat on it''s own, but I wore this to my cousin''s wedding.

I was trying to see if the venue''s cat would be a good accessory...

 

[princesss]

Pandora, I desperately want that gold hat.

Wow.

 

[iheartscience]

I went to one wedding last year where the clothing choices were just insane! It wasn''t super formal, but the groom and groomsmen still wore dark suits, and the bride had a bridal gown, fancy hair, etc., so it was certainly not casual. And several of the guests were wearing CARGO SHORTS and T-SHIRTS.

It was so bizarre.

But the worst was when I went to a full military funeral for a friend of mine who was killed in Iraq last year. Several people wore jeans, jean jackets, etc. to the wake, funeral and cemetery. It just seemed so disrespectful. I get that not everyone has a closet full of formal wear, but you can''t put on a pair of chino pants for a funeral?

 

[iheartscience]

I forgot:

Pandora, your hats (and your gold ensemble) are amazing! Can I come to London and go to some events with you?!

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

If I was going to a daytime wedding/ pizza and beer reception, there is no way I would think it was forma or even semi-formal, but I still wouldn''t be wearing jeans! I''d most likely wear a casual dress and heels and tell my boyfriend to wear a suit and tie with the option of leaving the jacket and tie in the car if we got there and everyone was casual. Better safe than sorry!

I''m actually kind of concerned (not worried, just taking into consideration) about what my SO would want to wear to a wedding. I am envisioning a Sunday brunch type of wedding, but I bet he envisions wearing his Navy uniform dress mess, which would be equivalent to a tuxedo. He did have the outfit custom tailored when he was living in Japan, so he probably wants an opportunity to wear it, knowing how he checked himself out in the mirror when he tried it on for me. No way would I let him wear that to a daytime wedding though, so I may be planning a wedding around what the groom wants to wear. How weird is that!

 

[ponderer]

Where I live cowboy boots with suits/tuxes are perfectly acceptable, even considered chic. I guess its a regional thing. I look at it like if we can wear amazing red/turquoise/hot pink

shoes under our wedding dresses, how can I complain if a guest or grooms man wears a black pair of boots that cost twice what my dress did with his suit

.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

At FI''s cousin''s wedding another cousin (from ''that'' side of the family-you know you have them too) wore a white eyelet sundress with no/the wrong undergarments and clear acrylic stripper shoes that had lights in the heels. Yes, they lit up! I''m so tempted to put that article in her invitation...

 

[sklingem]

Ah, all these rules. Can''t we just let people be? I know that some people are very uncomfortable in formal clothes. Do I want to force them to wear (or pry buy) those? Do I really care if some teenager shows up in jeans? To each his/her own, but I am certainly not going to drive myself nuts over some rules of etiquette that may (or may not!) apply to me.
That does not mean that I would disrespect a couple''s wishes for what they consider proper attire ...

 

[Rhea]

Date: 8/25/2008 9:27:30 AM
Author: rob09
Ah, all these rules. Can''t we just let people be? I know that some people are very uncomfortable in formal clothes. Do I want to force them to wear (or pry buy) those? Do I really care if some teenager shows up in jeans? To each his/her own, but I am certainly not going to drive myself nuts over some rules of etiquette that may (or may not!) apply to me.

That does not mean that I would disrespect a couple''s wishes for what they consider proper attire ...

I''d care if something showed up in jeans. I understand that some people aren''t happy in more formal dress, but I paid a lot for my photos have the group shots (very small wedding) on my living room wall in a frame that was signed by signed by everyone in attendance. Jeans could have thrown off my photo! This is important to some people, myself included.

Other than that, I''m really not too bothered by what people wear as long as it''s not a full-length white/ivory dress.

 

[galeteia]

Date: 8/23/2008 4:46:09 PM
Author: Pandora II

Pictures of pure awesomeness in hat form

Wowza. What wording should I put on my invites to make clear these kinds of hats are just shy of ''required'' attire?

 

[Shoopy]

Date: 8/25/2008 9:27:30 AM
Author: rob09
Ah, all these rules. Can't we just let people be? I know that some people are very uncomfortable in formal clothes. Do I want to force them to wear (or pry buy) those? Do I really care if some teenager shows up in jeans? To each his/her own, but I am certainly not going to drive myself nuts over some rules of etiquette that may (or may not!) apply to me.
That does not mean that I would disrespect a couple's wishes for what they consider proper attire ...

Ask your FF how she feels about that

Couples dish out a lot of money for photographers, for a beautiful venue, for a good meal for their guests. The least their guest could do is show up in decent attire so that in the photos they keep as a memory of the event everyone looks put together.

 

[lala2332]

pandora II : I LOVE your hats. I so wish we got to wear them more in the states.

I''m form the south and we have a bunch of horse races (not just the derby) and my friends and I all go out and buy hats for those, but they are still more casual, as we are in a field most of the day.

Anyway, I wish that trend would catch on here. Hats are so gorgeous and fun!

 

[SuLi]

Unfortunately, I think a list like this is necessary. I was at wedding in late June where all the men were wearing suits except for one guest. He came in a polo shirt and was asked by the MOB if he was with the catering company.

 

[Sabine]

I''ve seen at least one person/couple inappropriately dressed at every wedding I''ve been to I think, but the one I was at this weekend really took the cake! There was a young girl wearing jeans, but not just any jeans, holy, almost showing her butt cheeks jeans! And a white teeshirt that said holister in pink. And her guy was wearing dark pants and shirt with a baseball cap!

There was a young guy that wasn''t totally inappropriate, but he was wearing a white pinstripe suit, a pink shirt and tie, a HUGE fake diamond earring, and dollar bill cufflinks. It was quite amusing!

 

[ladypirate]

Pandora, I covet your hats. Seriously. Have you ever been to Ladies Hat Day at Ascot??? I went a couple of years ago when the races were held in York and the hats were just AMAZING.