Ungrateful vent

[Gypsy]

Let me start off by saying I have a LOT to be grateful for. A really GREAT new job, a nice large new apartment, and (as you might know) some great bling recently. Not to mention that my family is well, and I have my wonderful husband. Don't want to jinx myself.

Of course I've been sick with a bug I can't shake for going on 8 weeks now with 4 courses of antibiotics. Missed an ENTIRE week at my new job (just started last week) because I was delirious with fever and couldn't breathe for coughing. This might be why I am so fed up with the redecorating crap, because I just don't have the energy to deal. But...

On with the the vent. I've been re-doing parts of our house... trying to get rid of "I just graduated from college" chic we had going on. My bedroom has come together well... the drapes took more effort than I would have liked but I finally got them worked out. And now I just need to figure out some wall art and the room will be done. And I still have about 3 boxes left from the move to figure out in that room (much of it will be donated most likely).

Guest room has been a breeze to do. Office/man-cave is hubby's problem (and it is a problem!).

But the living room. First off all... moving has uncovered a TON of STUFF. I just don't know where it all came from. Or where to put some of it. Have donated car fulls of stuff already.

Second of all. Nothing, and I mean nothing, is working out in the living room!

I'm so ready for this re-decorating to be OVER.

The sectional came in. In one week the fabric was full of pulls and snags from the cats. Come to find out the fabric that I was TOLD was microfiber (which doesn't snag) is actually chenille (snag city). So after a TON of phone calls, Basset has agreed to replace it (I just wanted it re-holstered, but apparently replacing it is cheaper for them).

Well, they have no gray in microfiber. So I order microfiber (high quality) from an upholstery store and have it sent to them. Tack on another 350 price to the price of the sectional due to the fabric purchase (at this point Ethan Allen is looking better and better, and I'm kicking myself for not just getting the sectional from them).

It is also going to take FOREVER to get it done. And in the meantime all I have in the living room is hubby's recliner (eventually to reside in the man-cave) and a coffee table a TV stand and a TV.

The red rug I ordered and have now had for well over a month sheds more than my five cats COMBINED. I am vacuuming it every other day. It fills up my entire (thank god I have a bagless) vacuum every time I do it. I am using it in my entry way to keep wear on the carpet down to a minimum. As it turns out 5x8 is too small for our new space and I need at least a 7x9 in the living room (more money to spend!).

I'm on my 4th living room rug. I've returned three because the descriptions on the websites and the pictures just aren't accurate. I totally forgot that I can just order small ones (2x3) and get the larger one if it fits. I kept the red one but am using it in the entry way. One came in infested with bugs. Eww. And was all wrong anyway (brown and black when on the websites ALL OF THEM it came up as ivory and black).

The 'cool' ceiling fan/light I bought for the living room gives off just enough light to trigger migraines and seizures. So now I need more lighting in here.

The cute red pillows I bought on ebay were great initially. But I think the seller was a smoker (undisclosed) because I can't even get near the things now they stink. I am going to pull out the inserts and replace them and then dry clean the covers (wool, can't be washed) and see if that helps.

I've looked at all the local shops for a rug I like, in budget, with the right colors. Nope. Although I am going to Crate and Barrel this weekend so hopefully something, anything, there will strike me and I can just finish with the rug shopping.

The wall art I bought came in wrong. I ordered just art posters I could frame myself and they sent me mounted framed prints (wrong color on the mounting and the frames). I haven't even had the energy to deal with fixing that.

I just want my living room to be DONE. Argh.

Okay. Vent over. LOL.

ETA: Forgot to add that an entire box of framed prints and art is missing. Which had our wedding album in it. I have 5 boxes of crap I can't wait to get rid off floating around the house and one of the main boxes I had for this room is missing in action.

 

[mayerling]

Don't know what to say except push through and it'll all be over soon.

 

[JewelFreak]

There's a law, Gypsy, that when you AREN'T in the market for something, you see it everywhere; it disappears into vapor the minute you start looking for it. That's a law of physics & in the Bible too, lol. Hard as it is, patience is the key. Exactly what you want will turn up when you least expect it. If you absolutely must have a rug now, how about something inexpensive & bearable till you find the perfect one? Choosing colors online is tough w/ color distortion in photographing it & in your monitor. I look online, then try to find where the item is sold locally if possible, so I can see it IRL. (Doing that now for bathroom wallpaper.) Even if the store doesn't carry the same rug, if you find one that sells the same mfgr., they can order it.

Cats! NOTHING has given me more gray hairs! There isn't a rug made they can't wreck nor an upholstery fabric. I spent a zillion bucks re-doing my 9-ft.-long couch in material so dense & smooth, I thought they'd leave it alone. Fat chance. In 2 weeks it looked like an attic reject & I can't afford to change it now. Microfiber dining chairs are no better -- I get so enraged at the pulls on them that DH secretly snips them off before I see them. The cats use the scratching posts I have strategically scattered all over -- but carpeting & furniture too. "Thanks, Mom, great stuff you got us. And so much of it!"

You have my condolences! Easiest on the blood pressure if you accept that it takes time -- but if you're patient you'll eventually have exactly the decor you want, no compromises. Beer helps.

--- Laurie

 

[yennyfire]

I feel your pain Gypsy. I could have written this post myself, as we've been remodeling our living room and powder room for the past few months. I ordered a coffee table off of the internet (I saw it at Macy's, but it was $200 less online)...it came in damaged...they replaced it 3x and each time, the damage was worse than before....that was 2 months ago and I'm STILL waiting for my refund. I ended up getting the table at Macy's...The colors in the wall art I ordered isn't quite the same as it appeared on my computer monitor. I'm still not sure what to do about it. The contractor doing our powder room (the only bathroom on this floor of the house) said that it would be done in a week...all we were doing was tearing down the wallpaper, replacing the toilet, new light fixtures, and a custom built vanity. Fast forward 3 weeks and the painting is done and the new toilet is in, but the vanity isn't done and the light fixtures are on back order. Aarrgghhh....

My point in sharing this with you is that I don't think that decorating is ever a smooth process. I used a designer in the basement because it was such a big job (tearing down walls, designing wall units, etc.) that I didn't think I could do it myself. Double the budget later and I was still running around like a chicken with my head cut off because the builder didn't give me advance warning that they needed the tile tomorrow....

It's never fun and it's never easy. All I can say is that once it's done (to your liking), you'll enjoy it every day and the troubles will fade from your memory (kinda like childbirth!)....

Doing it when you're sick is WAY worse. Maybe you just need to let it go until you're feeling better? I know that I don't always make the best choices when I'm sick....hope that you feel better soon and that your living room is completed soon!

 

[junebug17]

Oh no! It does sound like you're having a rough time right now with this decorating project. I don't blame you for being frustrated, especially when ordered things don't work out and have to be sent back. Takes time and energy for all of that. But try to hang in there! It will be done eventually. Counting your blessings works sometimes, but at other times it feels really good to just say "this sucks!"

eta: I know what you mean about the ceiling fan - we put one in our sunroom, and I was really disappointed at how little light it throws off. We just live with it, since we're not out there that much at night. But it's prettty useless, and we had to stick a few table lamps out there.

 

[packrat]

Oh Gypsy you poor thing! Nothing like "when it rains it pours" eh? I hope things start clicking together for you soon, but in the meantime, sending hugs!

 

[asscher_girl]

Hey Gypsy, so sorry you're dealing with this nasty flu or whatever it is thing

Okay so here are some tips that I use and I'm using them right now since hubby and I are in the process of buying a new house (it's not done yet so we're able to pick out all of the finishes) etc

I know you want a "steal" or get good deals on things but for quality items, you just have to come to terms with spending some $$. I find that if I sacrifice and buy a cheap pillow, rug, etc, I end up not being happy with it in 6 months. So by the time I change it out, it would have been better to spend the money upfront. For example, there's the amazing chandelier that I want for the dining room at DWR, it's currently on sale for $2100, but Zgallerie has a knock off for $400. Sure I could save a ton of money but I want to do this right and get the real thing that I will be happy with for a long long time.

Also, I use photoshop and word docs to organize my rooms. I'll pull all of the images together for each room into their own page so I can see it come together. I did this for our living room 2 years ago, and I would go back and update the doc every so often but I sat on it for about 2 or 3 months before I made any purchases. If I still loved it after a few months, I knew it was worth buying. And after 2 years, I love my living room. And actually, in our new house all I'll be changing when we move is adding a second sofa (luckily they still carry the one I have) our new living room is a lot bigger, a new rug (since the room is bigger) and we'll do a new tv equip stand (since we'll be mounting the tv to the wall). All of my colors will remain the same and the basics will still be there.

Hope that helps! I know decorating can be overwhelming, but if you think things through carefully and organize your ideas, it will help, I promise

 

[House Cat]

Gypsy,

Please stop shopping online. You need to get out in order to FEEL and TOUCH each and every item you are buying. This will be more time consuming, but at least you will know what you are buying. Besides, what you are doing now has consumed too much time AND has frustrated you in the process.

 

[HollyS]

You aren't ungrateful, just frustrated. You have an inner vision of how you want it, and things just aren't coming together. If you hadn't been ill, as well as just starting a new job, you might not feel as overwhelmed. Take a deep breath, walk away from the 'mess' and go do something that feeds your soul.

Decorating, to me, is not buying everything at once and hope it all fits together. It is a gradual process of the space revealing itself, and fabrics/art/accessories added layer upon layer as they're found. So take it one step at a time; you have great taste and everything will come together eventually.

But I don't recommend purchasing any textiles online or mail order. You can't really tell what you'll get before you get it. Even some fabrics, natural or not, can possess odd and unpleasant smells. Or they're scratchy. Or they pull. Or they're sewn badly. See it, touch it, smell it before you buy.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Oh, girl...we've all been there. The home stretch is the hardest part.

When we redid our house a few years ago I was so burnt out in the end that I really slipped on a few rooms. I just gave up. Now, I'm in the process of redoing the redo...which is so stupid. I wish that I just pushed forward and been like "okay, I can do it".

Remember, you're building your HOME. Maybe it's not construction, even if it's just decorating...you're designing your life. It's a process. If you need a breather take it, but in the end all of the stress will be well, well worth it.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

HUGS Gypsy. I remember you mentioned some of this a couple weeks ago when I saw you - I didn't realize it was this bad though. You know I totally understand about the cats and the snagging! I'm not looking forward to having to shop for furniture in a couple months.

Wish I was there to help but in the meantime, big hugs!

 

[Gypsy]

Thank you guys for giving me the benefit of the doubt. And for giving me perspective.

Yeah, I am just frustrated. I went to Macy's Furniture and looked at over 1000 rugs today and to Crate and Barrel and came home with bumpkis. I did get a good sense of the different brands though and the quality. So that helped. While I would LOVE to not have to go online for the rug order, unfortunately it looks like I am stuck with it. We'll see. I might just suspend all rug operations for now.

The fabric I chose for the sectional (swatch) read blue in Macys; pure grey (no taupe) in crate and barrel; and reads slight taupe in my house. NEL was right (rug thread) about gray being a total PITA.

Holly you are right that it's a process. I just hate disarray in my house. And want it down NOW. I'm like a five year old when it comes to decorating gratification.

And the final push is the hardest. I will be AMAZED if DH really EVER does the office. I'll be happy if he buys some filing cabinets. Or if he uses the scanner and the shredder to copy everything and get rid of it.

I did narrow down the wall art for the living room to a vinyl decal of branches and a couple of birds. So that's progress. Though I'm not ordering it for a little while just to make sure I like it in a week. I have three I'm trying to decide between so we'll see which one still appeals in a while.

I will call Art.com and get them to arrange pick up for the art that wasn't right tomorrow.

Drapes will have to wait for a WHILE. They are too complicated. And expensive!!!!

I don't know what to do about the lighting. On the one hand I'd love a nice red end table with a cream gourd lamp on it. On the other hand Hally's other name is "Lampkiller" so anything ceramic is out. I don't generally care for the look of standing lamps but did fall in love with this one.... just not happy with the price tag! http://www.lampsplus.com/products/Brushed-Nickel-Arc-Floor-Lamp__59267.html

 

[VRBeauty]

Decorating, to me, is not buying everything at once and hope it all fits together. It is a gradual process of the space revealing itself, and fabrics/art/accessories added layer upon layer as they're found. So take it one step at a time; you have great taste and everything will come together eventually.

But I don't recommend purchasing any textiles online or mail order. You can't really tell what you'll get before you get it. Even some fabrics, natural or not, can possess odd and unpleasant smells. Or they're scratchy. Or they pull. Or they're sewn badly. See it, touch it, smell it before you buy.

Ditto and ditto.

 

[zoebartlett]

Holly and House Cat said what I was thinking: I think it's a good idea to spend more time in stores and less time online shopping for what you want. It's so hard to shop online for home decorating pieces because, as you've discovered, things look different in person.

I'm sorry it's not going well. Maybe you could take a break for a bit and get back into shopping when you're feeling better and you've had some time away from it.

 

[iheartscience]

Have you thought about hiring an interior designer? Or using the design services at a furniture store?

 

[Amber St. Clare]

Gypsy,

Please stop shopping online. You need to get out in order to FEEL and TOUCH each and every item you are buying. This will be more time consuming, but at least you will know what you are buying. Besides, what you are doing now has consumed too much time AND has frustrated you in the process.

THIS!!!

 

[LGK]

I feel ya on the sectional couch pain. We got a lovely leather sectional- turns out if it scratches, the dark brown peels off to a white. Which stands out like whoa. It also scratches really, really easily. After a year it's now dark brown with white pinstriping, essentially, thanks to wee kitty feets walking on it (that's all it takes to scratch it.) I have it covered in throws but it still annoys the crap out of me.

I'm glad your sofa's being replaced. I didn't find out mine was a problem in time to do anythingn except curse it.

I hope it all comes together- it'll be awesome when you're done!

Rats got into our storage area in our last apartment- it was a nice place, WTF rodents!- and ate my wedding album, so I can sympathize with how much it sucks to lose that. I hope yours turns up!

ETA: I do also think that taking as much of a break and extending the time you're spending on it is a good idea. We actually built our entire condo from scratch and I had to make endless amounts of decisions quick- the more I was rushed, the less happy I am with the end result. For example, with our bathroom I essentially had like two hours and one store's stock (Home Depot) to decide on EVERY aspect of it. I love the slate tile. I love the tub. I love the layout I decided on. I hate the white subway tile in the shower, which I picked because I was overwhelmed and just threw my hands up and got the simplest thing possible. So from experience I'd definitely say give yourself the time to find what you really want and like.

 

[geckodani]

Not ungrateful at all, just frustrated with something that isn't coming together the way you want it to! ((HUGS)) Hang in there! Wish I had some more practical options for ya.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Oh Gypsy, I'm so sorry. I've been trying to decorate/replace that college chic look in our house for nine months now? I can't take it anymore. A friend sent me a link to her house in another city and I almost cried because it was so put-together and I feel like aesthetically, my house is a mess.

What everybody says about not doing everything at once is true. At least I think it is. I try to do everything at once and it never comes together like I think it will. I've heard to just buy pieces you really love and they will work together. I feel like that should work, though I've never actually tried it myself, haha.

Also, sorry about the grays...they are a real PITA, aren't they? Now I know why black/white is so appealing.

Just wanted to offer you some support. I had a big of a breakdown over our house this weekend (after going to a furniture store) and I just wish everything were done. It's no fun.