LiW So I''m a control freak.....

[Iowa Lizzy]

I just want some opinions because I can''t tell if I''m a little nuts. (That said, I don''t want any cruel opinions...)

I''m a bit of a control freak. I told my SO I''d like to have an engagement period of about a year (no shorter than 9 months, no longer than 13). He is also aware I like summer months. (I live in Iowa, it''s pretty much unpredictable weather 6 months in a row here) And finally, I like EVEN years. That said, I told him to (kindly) not ask me any "significant" questions until 2009. Does that seem weird?

My mother keeps bugging me to just get engaged. She doesn''t think we should be living together if we''re not planning a wedding. For some reason, I just like nice even years. I was born in an even year, graduated high school and college in even years. Plus, how easy would it be to remember your anniversary if it''s in a year like 2010?

I am just a numbers person I guess. I''ll look through a calendar and say the dates out loud to see if I like the way they roll off the tongue.

My SO keeps teasing me that he''s going to ask soon so that I''ll have to get married in 09. I know I could just have a two year engagement, but I''m really not interested in that. (There''s a long story for that reason). Man this sounds superficial doesn''t it? I''m aware it''s not about the wedding, but rather the marriage.


Am I the only crazy LIW who would actually plan a wedding in accordance with a date I like?

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 7/22/2008 1:28:51 PM
Author:Iowa Lizzy

Am I the only crazy LIW who would actually plan a wedding in accordance with a date I like?

Yes.

Just kidding!

Let him do what he wants to do. The proposal is his thing, if it means an extra few months of planning, what will it hurt? I like the 2010 date too, but if it works out to be 2009, the world will not end, you know?

 

[Iowa Lizzy]

Oh believe me, I know this is a completely trivial topic. It''s not like I''d say "no" if he asked me sooner rather than later. It''s just that some girls have the dress, or the cake, or the RING picked out before they even have the guy. Is it really strange to have the (general) date picked out?

 

[sunnyd]

No, I have my secret date range too. He already said his part of wedding planning will be to just agree with everything I say...

If I were you I would try not to get wrapped up in the ''he must ask inbetween these dates!'' thing. It''ll all be great.

 

[meresal]

Date: 7/22/2008 1:28:51 PM
Author:Iowa Lizzy
I just want some opinions because I can't tell if I'm a little nuts. (That said, I don't want any cruel opinions...)

I'm a bit of a control freak. I told my SO I'd like to have an engagement period of about a year (no shorter than 9 months, no longer than 13). He is also aware I like summer months. (I live in Iowa, it's pretty much unpredictable weather 6 months in a row here) And finally, I like EVEN years. That said, I told him to (kindly) not ask me any 'significant' questions until 2009. Does that seem weird?

My mother keeps bugging me to just get engaged. She doesn't think we should be living together if we're not planning a wedding. For some reason, I just like nice even years. I was born in an even year, graduated high school and college in even years. Plus, how easy would it be to remember your anniversary if it's in a year like 2010?

I am just a numbers person I guess. I'll look through a calendar and say the dates out loud to see if I like the way they roll off the tongue.

My SO keeps teasing me that he's going to ask soon so that I'll have to get married in 09. I know I could just have a two year engagement, but I'm really not interested in that. (There's a long story for that reason). Man this sounds superficial doesn't it? I'm aware it's not about the wedding, but rather the marriage.


Am I the only crazy LIW who would actually plan a wedding in accordance with a date I like?

I was born in 1984, C in 1982, I graduated in 2002, and 2006. I would LOVE to get married in 2010, but I just don't think I could handle an engagement over a year... I would go absoluetly insane. You're not crazy, as long as it is what makes you and your BF happy, then go with it!!

ETA: If you REALLY like even numbers then wouldn't a 2008 proposal, with a 2010 wedding, and 16/18/20/22 months of planning be perfect?

 

[absolut_blonde]

It''s up to the person. We have a 2010 date in mind as well. But I''d happily get engaged at any point within the next few months. I don''t want an excessively long engagement (for ME, that would be over 18 months) but I wouldn''t mind having a few extra months to enjoy being a fiancee.

 

[sunnyd]

Touche meresal!

 

[Bia]

I'm with you Absolutblonde. I, too, want a 2010 wedding, but not because its an "even" year, just because it gives me enough time to finish grad school and then plan a wedding. I don't need more headaches.

Plus, I like the idea of just being engaged for awhile...I really do!

 

[purrfectpear]

There is nothing weird about having a plan for length of engagement and when you''d like to be married.

The whole "even numbers" thing is weird though. You sound a little OCD, but then there are many people who are. No biggie if FI is on board with all the rules.

 

[Dreamgirl]

Naaaaa I don''t think your crazy. A control freak, yes. But I tend to be that way too sometimes! Ive told ff I would like to be engaged for a year to a year and a half. He thinks a short engagement is good. But he''s crazy to think that because I can''t plan a wedding quickly! Im too meticulous about it and would want it to be just so.

Who knows what he will end up doing. But I myself, would really like to get married on the day we met. Which is our anniversary. It would just make sense to me. He said yeah that maybe that is a good date. So hopefully he can figure all that out in his head for a good time to propose then....lol

 

[jcarlylew]

nah - you just like numbers A LOT. as long as you are not as bad as the TV show Monk, right?

I understand wanting the timing to be right. I want to get engaged YESTERDAY, but then again i want to be married in march, but 2009 is too close- planing a BIG vacation in the BVI and moving. Plus my mom''s a teacher and she doesnt want march becuase its in the school year (psh!). But then again i dont want a summer wedding and cannot do fall becuase between the 2 families there are 8 birthdays 2 annys and christmas. And i dont know if i can wait more than 1 year - although if i am paying for it i will probably have to wait 10 years

so - i hear ya girl!

 

[TheNextMrsB]

Actually, I understand. Even numbers are totally more pleasing to the ear. If I had my way, I would marry on an odd-numbered date in an even-numbered year. Actually, I would like an odd-numbered date in the 20''s. For me, June 25, 2010, sounds so much better than June 12, 2009. The first date just has a nicer, rounder sound. I always blamed it on the fact that musical theater is a major hobby of mine. I just figured it forced me to think about subtle differences in sounds that other people may not think about. Now I just think I''m crazy.

 

[princesss]

I''m going to have to be the voice of dissent. I think that''s a little over the top. You''re putting a lot of pressure on him to time things right for you...what about his timeline and letting him have a say in this?

I don''t know. I guess I just don''t get the idea that you get to try to decide all of this. I know you''d say yes no matter what, but...it still seems a bit nuts. Just a tad (I''m kind of a control freak as well, and occasionally about stupid stuff) but still...kind of nutty.

 

[ilovethiswebsite]

Everyone is superstitiou to a certain degree but you have to be careful not to let it get out of control and control you... which is exactly what it seems like is happening when you say you would only want to get engaged in 2009 and have a 9-12 month engagement! Just let goooooo and goooo with the flow. Life will take you where you are meant to be!

 

[supergirl10]

yes i kind of understand.

I don''t want to get married until i graduate (dec 09). But after i personally would loved to get married asap so a wedding soon after was always my plan. I always thought sometime in 2010 would be perfect. Our anniversary is April 10 and as it turns out in 2010 April 10 is a Saturday ... perfect right. So that will be our 6 year anniversary and this is what our plan is so far.

 

[honey22]

Nothing wrong with having a plan etc, but I think it''s good to keep in mind that this is your BF''s engagement too. He is the one doing to asking of the important question, so I don''t think it''s fair to dictate to him (kindly) when that question can be asked. I am not trying to be snarky here at all, so I hope this post doesn''t come accross that way, but I think it''s good to look at the big picture - the man of your dreams is asking the most important question he will ever ask you, when it comes down to it, it doesn''t matter when he does it. In the big scheme of things, does it really matter if your engagement period is slighty over or under your timeframe?

 

[customcushion]

You should really have an honest conversation with your BF to see what *he* wants, and then you two can decide what is best for *both* of you.

 

[meresal]

Iowa Lizzy, are you coming back???

What did you think of my all even numbers idea???

 

[Iowa Lizzy]

Date: 7/23/2008 10:31:12 AM
Author: meresal
Iowa Lizzy, are you coming back???

What did you think of my all even numbers idea???

Meresal, I love your even numbers idea! However, if I got engaged in 2008 with a 16 mo. engagement, that would mean I'd have to get hitched no later than April 2010. I'm in Iowa, we could very well get 5 feet of snow in April here!

Princess, I realize it's nuts! And I appreciate your opposition in the matter. You sound exactly like my mother. She just gets baffled when I talk about dates like that. My SO doesn't really care when we get married. He'd do it at the courthouse tomorrow if I asked.

TheNextMrsB, I think you and I are a little TOO alike! I don't have a thing for numbers (let's be honest, I can't even do long division!), but I just like the nice sound of a perfect date.

I told my SO last night that I posted this question to all of you. He just rolled his eyes. I told him, "go ahead and propose tomorrow.... just be prepared for a LONG engagement with LOTS of wedding talk." I think he'd rather hear about "the perfect ring" for a year rather than "the perfect floral arrangement, perfect cake, and perfect invitations" for two years. Tee hee.

ETA: And Honey22, I didn't find your post snarky at all. Just honest. And that's what I hoped for.