Wedding Snarky girls on The Knot

[AllieLuv83]

OMG some girls are real BEOTCHES! Its like my time machine must be working because I am back in high school!

 

[MsSassy]

lol....

 

[vintagelover229]

Yea, they can be. But you just have to keep in mind...it''s a public forum just like any other...with the good comes the bad. I don''t know if they have the regulations like PS does...I know you can''t slauter anybody on here...theknot can be very nasty...sorry hun!

 

[Sha]

Yup, the girls at The Knot seem to be snarkier than any other forums I''ve been on. I stopped going there after I found that out. I still sometimes check out The Nest (newlywed part of The Knot) but the snark-o-meter there is kind of high too...although there are some pretty interesting discussions on it.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

My first reaction: there''s a lot ''em! The knot can be great and it can be blegh. It''s hit or miss I think.

Gotta

PS!

 

[Diva0413]

lol...

I''ve also noticed the same thing on the brides.com community forum... Sheesh...

 

[Nocturnius]

I was a member of both TheKnot and Brides.

I quit going to the Knot after one of my threads went like this:

"My FH's families do not get along very well and I'm concerned about how to seat them at the ceremony. I know parents should have the front row, but his parents will NOT sit next to each other, and no one in the family would serve as a fair buffer between them. Is there a good way to approach this?"

The thread did not answer my question; instead, they looked at my profile, saw that I was 18 at the time and started in on, "you're too young to be getting married anyway, especially if you can't even figure out how to seat your in-laws! Grow up a little and come back in fve years when you're old enough to get married."

Also, when I explained a bad experience with a vendor, I got called a Bridezilla for involving my mother in my planning.

I stayed with Brides for a while, but it seemed to lose its appeal after my wedding and a few posters just made it to the point where I hated being there. Warfare started over this rotten poster's nonsense "what I expect as a guest" post, which was mant as nothing but a snarky, rude means of berating brides. That one poster ALWAYS boiled my blood, but it was really brought to a head then. She always had some smartass comment to make to everyone, and then she had these little groupies that followed her like sheep.

I definitely find PS to be far more helpful, informative and friendly.

 

[marchswallowbird]

Hey, Nocturnus, I am running into the same dliemma you posted about on The Knot, about your parents being divorced and not getting along, and you wondering how to seat them at the ceremony.

How did you eventually work this out?

 

[AllieLuv83]

I posted about this vendor that is HIIIIGHLY recommended, asking for advice because the vendor was behaving badly and everyone jumped down my throat saying I was OVERREACTING and then, some girl posed a thread being like "AM I OVERREACTING...BUT DONT SAY NO" clearly poking fun at me...so I got a little hurt!

 

[wishful]

Hmmmm.....good to know. I think I''ll be staying far far away from there.

 

[palomablancabride]

The only redeeming part of the knot message boards for me is my local board- no snarkiness at all, no matter how "dumb" someone's question may be. I was partiuclarly

last night when I saw a thread on a national board titled "Who do you hate more [Palin or Biden]?"

 

[newbie124]

Yeah, I've found that one of the other perks of having our wedding in CA is that the Northern CA knot board has some of the friendliest/most helpful brides. I was even amazed to see that many have invited other knotties to "crash" their weddings when it appeared that they were under their estimated guest count!

My local board, on the other hand, for whatever reason has a lot of snarky brides, which is another reason why I just lurk there on occasion but don't frequently post.

They complain about the P&E board, but I think some of the girls on my local one are just as bad. Like they have nothing better to do than sit around making mean comments to people they don't even know who are just there to ask for help/advice. (Really? Do you not have anything better to do with your time/life? or are you just that nasty of a person?) It's kind of pathetic...

Recently a girl on the CA board posted wondering if she should be upset that no one was throwing her a shower/bach party. I can say with near certainty that she would have been ripped apart on my local board. But the girls on the CA board immediately jumped on board and offered to throw her a knottie shower! How awesome is that? Really exemplified the difference in attitudes...

 

[doodle]

Date: 10/3/2008 12:23:13 PM
Author: Nocturnius
I was a member of both TheKnot and Brides.


I quit going to the Knot after one of my threads went like this:


''My FH''s families do not get along very well and I''m concerned about how to seat them at the ceremony. I know parents should have the front row, but his parents will NOT sit next to each other, and no one in the family would serve as a fair buffer between them. Is there a good way to approach this?''


The thread did not answer my question; instead, they looked at my profile, saw that I was 18 at the time and started in on, ''you''re too young to be getting married anyway, especially if you can''t even figure out how to seat your in-laws! Grow up a little and come back in fve years when you''re old enough to get married.''

Also, when I explained a bad experience with a vendor, I got called a Bridezilla for involving my mother in my planning.


I stayed with Brides for a while, but it seemed to lose its appeal after my wedding and a few posters just made it to the point where I hated being there. Warfare started over this rotten poster''s nonsense ''what I expect as a guest'' post, which was mant as nothing but a snarky, rude means of berating brides. That one poster ALWAYS boiled my blood, but it was really brought to a head then. She always had some smartass comment to make to everyone, and then she had these little groupies that followed her like sheep.

I definitely find PS to be far more helpful, informative and friendly.

This cracked me up--I''m the WORST about being a smart ass on pretty much EVERYTHING, but the knottie boards even managed to offend me on more than one occasion--they''re not smart asses...but a different profanity pops to mind! it''s one thing to joke around and be sarcastic with someone, but it''s different when you''re saying something with the intention to hurt someone rather than tease them, ya know? i sincerely hope my sarcasm on this board has never offended or hurt the feelings of anyone on here! ...maybe the knot boards just need more smilies--you can always let someone know you''re just kidding with a smilie, right?

...well?? did it work???see?! it''s all in the smilie!

 

[AllieLuv83]

It took so much out of me not to give into the snarkiness and post something in reply instead I said thank you for being funny and brightening up my day with your jokes.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Date: 10/3/2008 12:23:13 PM
Author: Nocturnius
I was a member of both TheKnot and Brides.


I quit going to the Knot after one of my threads went like this:


''My FH''s families do not get along very well and I''m concerned about how to seat them at the ceremony. I know parents should have the front row, but his parents will NOT sit next to each other, and no one in the family would serve as a fair buffer between them. Is there a good way to approach this?''


The thread did not answer my question; instead, they looked at my profile, saw that I was 18 at the time and started in on, ''you''re too young to be getting married anyway, especially if you can''t even figure out how to seat your in-laws! Grow up a little and come back in fve years when you''re old enough to get married.''

Also, when I explained a bad experience with a vendor, I got called a Bridezilla for involving my mother in my planning.


I stayed with Brides for a while, but it seemed to lose its appeal after my wedding and a few posters just made it to the point where I hated being there. Warfare started over this rotten poster''s nonsense ''what I expect as a guest'' post, which was mant as nothing but a snarky, rude means of berating brides. That one poster ALWAYS boiled my blood, but it was really brought to a head then. She always had some smartass comment to make to everyone, and then she had these little groupies that followed her like sheep.

I definitely find PS to be far more helpful, informative and friendly.

Well..bad news for you Nocturnius..I love PS and it is definitely all the things you''ve said, but there''s some of that anti-young people rudeness occasionally here as well. It''s very frustrating and uncalled for. Oh well, what can we do? Not trying to flame anyone, don''t flame me, bro!

 

[Nocturnius]

marchswallowbird:
I ended up just letting it go. I picked a menu that didn''t require a seating chart in the reception, and decided to let them work it out for themsleves who would go where.
In the end, his mom, her husband and her parents took the front row and his dad sat in the next row with his two daughters (my husband''s sisters) and his mother. His step-siblings then politely took the row after them.
At the reception, his dad, grandma, aunt and uncle (who are on his dad''s side) all sat at one tale with the groomsmen, and his mom, stepdad, sisters and maternal grandparents sat at another one. They divided themselves pretty much how I would have done myself, but I avoided drama because I wasn''t the one splitting them up or making them sit in the second row - they did it on their own.
I don''t know if your family would do the same, but it did work out for me in the end hen I just quit stressing about it and let them handle it themselves.

doodle:
Exactly. Her bitey comments were intended to offend people. At one point, someone finally spoke up and said on a post, "seriously? This etiquette Nazi stuff needs to stop. It''s making this entire board completely hostile." (And it was.) Her response? "Dear (original poster): Take a pill." Oh yes, what a mature remark coming from a grown woman. That also was irritating; she phrased all of her responses as if she was writing a Dear Abby column.

SarahLovesJS:
I''m sure there probably is plenty of anti-young brides on here. But now that I''m actually married, I don''t really care anymore. It only bothered me when I was engaged and felt like I had to defend myself against these people for some reason. Now, I know I don''t have to defend myself against anyone.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Date: 10/3/2008 7:57:46 PM
Author: Nocturnius
marchswallowbird:

I ended up just letting it go. I picked a menu that didn''t require a seating chart in the reception, and decided to let them work it out for themsleves who would go where.

In the end, his mom, her husband and her parents took the front row and his dad sat in the next row with his two daughters (my husband''s sisters) and his mother. His step-siblings then politely took the row after them.

At the reception, his dad, grandma, aunt and uncle (who are on his dad''s side) all sat at one tale with the groomsmen, and his mom, stepdad, sisters and maternal grandparents sat at another one. They divided themselves pretty much how I would have done myself, but I avoided drama because I wasn''t the one splitting them up or making them sit in the second row - they did it on their own.

I don''t know if your family would do the same, but it did work out for me in the end hen I just quit stressing about it and let them handle it themselves.


doodle:

Exactly. Her bitey comments were intended to offend people. At one point, someone finally spoke up and said on a post, ''seriously? This etiquette Nazi stuff needs to stop. It''s making this entire board completely hostile.'' (And it was.) Her response? ''Dear (original poster): Take a pill.'' Oh yes, what a mature remark coming from a grown woman. That also was irritating; she phrased all of her responses as if she was writing a Dear Abby column.

SarahLovesJS:

I''m sure there probably is plenty of anti-young brides on here. But now that I''m actually married, I don''t really care anymore. It only bothered me when I was engaged and felt like I had to defend myself against these people for some reason. Now, I know I don''t have to defend myself against anyone.

Very true Nocturnius - don''t have to defend yourself against anyone. It is YOUR life after-all! Anyway, I don''t know if I have told you this, but even if I have I want to tell you again belated best wishes!

 

[gtn]

NorCal knotties have been pretty supportive. I found that posting on theknot was very helpful for local queries. I haven''t been on the general chat pages though.

I found that I didn''t like theknot because it was so user unfriendly, but I did troll it a lot.