Selling engagement ring and hurt feelings...

[Amys Bling]

How about if you incorporated the stone into a three stone ring with this stone being one of the sidestones? If you could get one that matched and a bigger center stone you'd be all set! Don't know what your perfect proportions would be but it seems to me that in your three stone thread you were going after a three stone ring with the center stone not being tremendously larger than the sides. A center of 1.35 - 1.50 maybe? You'd have tremendous bling and would have saved the original stone. A win-win solution!

great idea.

 

[blackberry16]

I went through the same thing about 3 years ago. DH picked out and proposed with a ring that he chose entirely on his own. I was happy with it for years and then I saw my dream setting. We discussed it and in the end decided to reset the stone in the new setting. We had intended to sell the setting and one of the bands if we needed to to cover the cost of the new ring. He said that he loved the old ring but wanted me to love my ring more. We never did sell the old setting (not worth the little we would get for it) but I think I could if I needed to. I thought at the time that it would break our hearts not to have the first setting he gave me, but after 3 years it just sits in the box. My DH proposed again with the new ring and it has just as much meaning as the first.

 

[Amys Bling]

I went through the same thing about 3 years ago. DH picked out and proposed with a ring that he chose entirely on his own. I was happy with it for years and then I saw my dream setting. We discussed it and in the end decided to reset the stone in the new setting. We had intended to sell the setting and one of the bands if we needed to to cover the cost of the new ring. He said that he loved the old ring but wanted me to love my ring more. We never did sell the old setting (not worth the little we would get for it) but I think I could if I needed to. I thought at the time that it would break our hearts not to have the first setting he gave me, but after 3 years it just sits in the box. My DH proposed again with the new ring and it has just as much meaning as the first.

I like this gesture. If you decide to sell and start a whole new rings, including DH in the shopping and process- and then him giving you the ring-propsing again with it could be a nice anniversary

 

[Laila619]

How about if you incorporated the stone into a three stone ring with this stone being one of the sidestones? If you could get one that matched and a bigger center stone you'd be all set! Don't know what your perfect proportions would be but it seems to me that in your three stone thread you were going after a three stone ring with the center stone not being tremendously larger than the sides. A center of 1.35 - 1.50 maybe? You'd have tremendous bling and would have saved the original stone. A win-win solution!

great idea.

With diamond prices the way they are, it'd be very expensive to buy a 1.5 carat and then a .90 carat side stone! I honestly don't want to pour that much more money into this darn ring. It is a nice idea though, the bling factor would be awesome!

 

[MissGotRocks]

How about if you incorporated the stone into a three stone ring with this stone being one of the sidestones? If you could get one that matched and a bigger center stone you'd be all set! Don't know what your perfect proportions would be but it seems to me that in your three stone thread you were going after a three stone ring with the center stone not being tremendously larger than the sides. A center of 1.35 - 1.50 maybe? You'd have tremendous bling and would have saved the original stone. A win-win solution!

great idea.

With diamond prices the way they are, it'd be very expensive to buy a 1.5 carat and then a .90 carat side stone! I honestly don't want to pour that much more money into this darn ring. It is a nice idea though, the bling factor would be awesome!

Yeah, I know the downside is the money for two stones - it would be a chunk! I hope you find a solution to your ring dilemma though and I'm sure you will. It's just having the right setting or the right thing come along and it's hard to be patient until that happens.

 

[Amys Bling]

How about if you incorporated the stone into a three stone ring with this stone being one of the sidestones? If you could get one that matched and a bigger center stone you'd be all set! Don't know what your perfect proportions would be but it seems to me that in your three stone thread you were going after a three stone ring with the center stone not being tremendously larger than the sides. A center of 1.35 - 1.50 maybe? You'd have tremendous bling and would have saved the original stone. A win-win solution!

great idea.

With diamond prices the way they are, it'd be very expensive to buy a 1.5 carat and then a .90 carat side stone! I honestly don't want to pour that much more money into this darn ring. It is a nice idea though, the bling factor would be awesome!

it would be quite the bling

 

[MakingTheGrade]

My hubby bought my ring in about 2 weeks, picked out the setting in a matter of minutes after being caught unprepared by the salesman after buying the diamond and being asked "so hey...did you want to pick out the actual ring part of this too?". He picked out something very lovely and classic and traditional, but more to his mom's taste than mine. So recently, the diamond was reset into a van craeynest setting I adore, and I'm going to set a colored stone into my old setting since I can't imagine selling it (and the stone needs setting anywas, win win!).

 

[Enerchi]

Laila....
What did you decide to do?

 

[Lady_Disdain]

Pendant! Pendant! Pendant!

 

[Laila619]

Laila....
What did you decide to do?

Hi Enerchi,

I'm still torn and undecided.

Thank you for sharing your stories, everyone!! You all had good points for me to think about.

 

[Enerchi]

Take your time. The right decision will present itself. Rushing only messes things up!

 

[MissGotRocks]

Laila, I don't know where your Leo diamond was purchased but a friend of mine was looking at three stone Leo rings at Jareds a couple of years back. They had a beautiful three stone mounting with different sized three stone combinations of Leo diamonds that were just beautiful. In the end, she decided on a different choice but just thought I would mention this. I didn't realize your stone was loose so trading it in on another ring might make it seem more a 'part' of a new ring. Leo diamonds get some bad press here but they really are beautiful stones. A bit of a different look but beautiful just the same. I'm just thinking if you traded it in you would get full value for what you paid toward another ring. Just a thought!

 

[Missy]

Laila, I didn't read the whole thread but wanted to add my perspective if it could help in any way.

My dh picked out a stone and setting without any input from me (and totally unbeknownst to me) and proposed in quite the romantic way. However, almost immediately I thought that this ring won't do. I mean, you are wearing the ring all the days of your life and it needs to reflect your tastes and sensibilities. I was about to marry the man truly of my dreams (the man I never thought existed in real life) and that was the important thing of course but why be stuck with a ring you didn't love at least a fraction as much as your man? So I think I waited all about a week before I told him how I felt about the ring (yeah, patience isn't my strong suit LOL). At first I think he was a bit hurt but after I explained exactly how I felt and why I felt this way he "got" it and was totally onboard with a total redo of the ring. We sold the original (at quite a loss too but hey, live and learn).

The key is of course getting your SO totally onboard though so you can both feel good about the transaction. If he still has an attachment to the original diamond I would gently try to show him why a ring is just a material possession and doesn't hold any power over the realtionship. However, if he still feels attached/sentimental about the diamond well his feelings are his feelings and then keep it and use it in another piece of jewelry. No harm no foul. That way you both can feel good about it. But if you don't sell it then use it woman!! Put that diamond to good use!!

 

[FairieMoon79]

My husband and I suppose are odd in how we do things....I am allowed to change my ering to anything I want, however many times I want(as long as we can afford it!) but I am not allowed to change my wedding ring. To him the promise is in the band he put on my hand when we married.

That being said, I will always be of the camp that says what makes the heart sing is what the heart wants. I had an ering that I had stacked a bunch of bands with and it was too busy combined with the fact it was set in silver....ultimately I traded it toward one bigger piece. However I ended up loosing a diamond out of the trade, so I knew even if it was repaired, it would spend all its time in a box, as I was afraid it was too delicate for me. I went back to where it came from and they let me return it as long as what I picked was equal or greater value. My husband believes its my ring and i should wear what makes me happy.

I believe also jewelry shouldnt sit in a box, so my vote would be to either use the stone as part of an ering you will enjoy, or put it toward something else. If you husband truly didnt want you to, I feel he would have made it much clearer. I believe people are supposed to say what they feel, not expect you to read between the lines of what he truly means.

Good luck in whatever you decide

 

[radiantquest]

I picked out my own ER and DH didnt propse with it and STILL I would want to keep it.

I think in this situation I would keep the diamond and let the setting go. You said that you have reset it a few times and still arent happy with it. Regardless of whether it was a sentimental purchase or not I feel that the diamond was there with you when you were just starting out together. It was there from the beginning. I also think it would be nice to keep so that 50 years later you can look back and see where you "came from" as a couple.