Wedding Ring Question...

[Pandora II]

I have a channel set curved band that was made by Wink to fit my e-ring which will be my main wedding band.

I don't feel comfortable wearing blingy jewellery for certain areas of my work where I deal with people from very disadvantaged backgrounds, nor would I wear it abroad in developing countries.

So, I have also bought a 22kt plain gold band from 1908 (I liked the 100 years thing), which I intend to wear at those times - which will be about 40% of the time.

Question is, should I be married with both, or just the one? ie, should FI put both rings on my finger during the ceremony? I'd like to feel that both rings are 'real' if that makes sense...

What would you do???

 

[lliang_chi]

I''d probably just use the Wink band. The 1908 band doesn''t need to be in the ceremony to be "real" and having that many rings flying around is one *more* think to keep track of. Is it totally shameless for me to ask for pictures...?

 

[ladyciel]

I don''t think there''s anything you "should" do in your situation. I think it''s more about what you WANT to do. If having your 2nd ring included in the ceremony will make you feel more attached to it and happy to wear it those times you need to, then by all means go ahead and do it! I do agree that the logistics might be that much tricker, but I don''t think it''s impossible. Maybe have FI practice holding the two rings together as one so he can put them on at the same time?

If the ring''s presence that day is more important than its involvement in the ceremony, maybe you could wear it on your right hand or have it sewn into your dress somewhere?

All that said, I don''t think the ring *has* to be included in the public ceremony for it to be "real". You could ask your FI to give you the ring in a private ring ceremony afterwards and/or have it blessed by your officiant if that''s something that falls in line with your religious views/beliefs.

 

[Shoopy]

It depends on your religious preferences. I know some people believe that the rings are blessed during the ceremony so if that is your belief, then I would do both. Otherwise, as mentioned above its one more thing to worry about.

I absolutely love your e-ring. And I want to see pics of the band too!!!

P.S. I will be doing the same since I travel internationally all the time.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

We decided to just use one band for the ceremony because it was easiest (I was literally thinking about things like "Should he say ''with these rings, I thee wed''?"), but I have friends who''ve used two and it''s no big deal. They just slipped both rings on the finger instead of one.

 

[Elmorton]

I have a plain band to wear too, and I wish I''d had it for the ceremony. I would have done both. If you''re having a religious ceremony, you can always ask your clergy to simply bless the second ring after the ceremony.

 

[Deelight]

That's a toughie I understand where your coming from, I think if you feel best about using both rings do it that way and have both included, you will be wearing both bands for a significant chunk of time each so it does make sense, well to me it does .

 

[lucy.lucy.80]

Date: 7/14/2008 10:33:52 AM
Author: Elmorton
I have a plain band to wear too, and I wish I''d had it for the ceremony. I would have done both. If you''re having a religious ceremony, you can always ask your clergy to simply bless the second ring after the ceremony.

ditto!

I have two wedding bands also (one blingy matching my e-ring & one very plain for every day stuff) and I will be having both blessed one at the ceremony and one at the rehearsal the night before.

 

[Rhea]

I got married with both the plain band and the blingy band. It was easy. He had both in his hand and just stacked them on my fingers putting them on one at a time. No one noticed except my mother who knew ahead of time I had two rings.

Mine are a bit opposite of yours. My antique band is the blingy one and the modern band is the plain one.

I wanted both rings to be my "wedding band" rather than thought of, admittedly it only matters to us, as a "travel ring". My DH does care. I have several engraved antique wedding bands and he said that he prefers to see me wear either one of my wedding bands to what he considers to be a random ring off of ebay.

 

[Pandora II]

I''m a very staunch atheist, so no religious beliefs involved. But I take my marriage vows seriously and despite my having found the second band on ebay I''d like it to feel less random as Addy put it.

I think I might wear it on my right hand and then it has been there for the ceremony, but I can see trying to put two bands on at once might be a tad difficult as neither is very tiny!

This is the plain band - it''s 4mm wide and being 22kt is a very yellow gold - I love the colour of pure gold and this is as close as it gets!

 

[Pandora II]

My blingy band:

 

[Pandora II]

I don''t have any pics yet of the two actual rings together, but here is the CAD. It was fun to see what me e-ring looked like with a diamond.

 

[surfgirl]

Ahhh, I totally get this question! We didn''t think to get me a travel ring until after we got married, if we had done this before our ceremony, I''d have gotten the plain band and used it with the wband during our ceremony, just so it could be "part of the ceremony" (as if the ring knows it''s part of a ceremony, WTH?!?).

Does your ering fit on your right hand? If so, (mine did not so doing two wbands would have been tricky as I slipped my ering on/off during the exchanging of rings) why not just use both? As long as your ering can be worn on your other hand, then all your rings get to participate in the day!

 

[Rhea]

Pandora, I meant no harm with the ebay statement. It''s easily the best place to find antique bands! I wore my e-ring on my right hand and had the 5mm antique band and the 3mm modern band stacked on my left hand. Right after the ceremony I moved the rings around. It sounds silly sometimes when explaining it to others, but I just wanted both rings put on my left ring finger for that 10 minutes.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 7/15/2008 1:41:18 AM
Author: Addy
Pandora, I meant no harm with the ebay statement. It''s easily the best place to find antique bands! I wore my e-ring on my right hand and had the 5mm antique band and the 3mm modern band stacked on my left hand. Right after the ceremony I moved the rings around. It sounds silly sometimes when explaining it to others, but I just wanted both rings put on my left ring finger for that 10 minutes.

Addy, don''t worry, I didn''t see it in any weird way at all! Hey, 99% of my shopping is done on Ebay. I LOVE the place and I am the bargain queen. I HATE paying more than I need to and labels/brands etc mean nothing to me. I need lots of evening dresses for my job and if it wasn''t for ebay I''d be bankrupt by now.

I am very fond of people who buy new wardrobes every season and then sell the last lot - I have a lovely array of Hobbs suits none of which I paid more than $40 for - and 70% came unworn and with original tags! In the shop they''re at least $300.

I know exactly what you mean about the bands and it''s exactly how I feel about them. I don''t want to feel that I''m wearing a complete ''fake''.

 

[lliang_chi]

Pandora, sounds like you have a pretty good plan with the bands. I''m just writing this post to say I love both bands! Beautiful comno with the e-ring & the blingy-band. And the gold band is classic and timeless. I love how it''s 100 yrs old. Okay I''ll go away now. Just wanted to compliment you on your rings.