Red dress to wedding?

[shop_girl]

Jeff (fiance) and I are invited to a wedding in Conneticut on August 2rd. I believe its on Mystic Island?

Is it aproppriate for me to wear a red dress to the wedding? Its a Tracy Reese cocktail dress with gold underlay (knee lenght), I will wear gold strappy sandals. It an afternoon wedding with reception at 5/6pm. Her colors are brown and ivory, if it matters. Its NOT an asian wedding, as I know that red is considered a lucky color in asian cultures.

I have a yellow J.Crew halter dress as back up but the Tracy Reese dress is my first choice.

What do you think?
Thanks!

 

[ljsmith001]

pics? i think red would be fine! although, the yellow sounds super cute! i wanna see pics of you in them!!!

 

[qtiekiki]

I personally don''t like to wear red to a wedding, and I didn''t really like it when DH''s cousin''s gf wore red to our wedding. I think red is a little too much for a wedding, but that''s just my opinion.

 

[palomablancabride]

Red''s fine.

 

[swingirl]

A red and gold cocktail dress might be over-the-top. Post pictures.

Can you find out how formal the reception is and what others your age are wearing? Is it a more conservative crowd? In California no one would bat and eye at red or gold but the East Coast is a little more traditional.

 

[iheartscience]

Hmm...I think the red dress might just be too dressy if it''s an early evening reception. I would find out how formal the wedding is also. Red doesn''t offend me, though, and I''m an east coast girl.

 

[Fancy605]

I have never thought anything of whether people should wear red to a wedding. I know if I were the bride, I would think nothing of my guests wearing red. In fact one of my friends wore a red cocktail dress to mine (of course then again, I did have some elderly family members refer to her as the girl in the red dress, so maybe there is something to not wearing red that I just don''t know about). Anyway, I agree with the others. It would be best to post pics.

 

[dutchflowers]

Your red dress sounds like it may be a bit too formal for the wedding - but if not, then wear it! I''ve never heard of red being a taboo color at a wedding and wouldn''t think twice about it if a guest wore a red dress to my wedding.

 

[Gypsy]

I''m having a reception that starts at about the same time, on a Sunday. I''d be fine with anyone wanting to show up in a red cocktail gown. Just make sure cocktail dress is the right ''level'' of formality. I think red is fine for a wedding (I''m not asian), as long as its not white or ivory... doesn''t bother me.

 

[shop_girl]

Thanks ladies for all your responses.
The dress is actually not formal and is appropriate for daytime. Its a straw crochet with the flat gold underlay- sounds strange, but its beautiful. Sleeveless with A-line skirt to knee. My main concern was the color and not the design or formality of the dress. Wedding is not for another two weeks. I can always shop for something new.

I agree with most of you. I would not mind if someone wore red to my wedding just not a poufy white dress.

Samantha

 

[Hera]

I wouldn''t if I were you. There are too many other dresses/colors to take a chance on offending the bride or older guests etc....

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

I don''t own a red dress, but I cannot see why red would be any different than bright blue or purple, unless you''re talking about a slutty or showy dress that would be inappropriate in any color and just extra attention grabbing in red.

It used to be that black was a taboo color at a wedding (besides white of course), and now over half of the girls are in little black dresses.

So in my humble opinion, as long a the dress would be appropriate to the venue and time of the event, I don''t think it being red makes a difference. My only caution in wearing red would be to make sure it isn''t her bridesmaids'' dress color, and you''ve already said that they are in brown and ivory. I would feel awkward if I matched the bridesmaids at a wedding.

 

[OUpearlgirl]

I''ve worn red to a wedding before. I don''t think there is anything wrong with it. The only color rules I have ever heard are don''t wear black or white. The red dress sounds perfect!

 

[Fancy605]

Date: 7/21/2008 9:31:02 AM
Author: OUpeargirl
The only color rules I have ever heard are don''t wear black or white.

Which is funny because now (well in my area at least) there are always droves of girls in black at weddings.

 

[KimberlyH]

I don''t see the issue. If your concerned about offending the bride I can tell you if you were a guest at my wedding I probably wouldn''t have noticed, unless it was to think "Wow, I love what shop_girl is wearing!" Then again, my mom wore white to my wedding and I thought she looked stunning, and perfectly appropriate, so what do I know.

 

[clop]

Hi Shop Girl, your dress sounds lovely. I''ve never heard of a no red rule, only a no white rule, and sometimes on occasion no black dresses.

Keep in mind in some asian weddings, it is customary for brides to change into a red qipao (asian style dress) during the reception. Some consider red to be the bride''s color, much like white. However, my at my friend''s wedding, not only did she change into a qipao, her bridesmaids wore dark red, and she encouraged her other non bm friends to also wear red.

 

[Delster]

Date: 7/21/2008 9:45:55 AM
Author: Fancy605

Date: 7/21/2008 9:31:02 AM
Author: OUpeargirl
The only color rules I have ever heard are don't wear black or white.

Which is funny because now (well in my area at least) there are always droves of girls in black at weddings.

Yup, here too. Actually even cream/white/ivory is fine to a wedding in Ireland once it doesn't look like a wedding dress or a bridesmaids' dress. It's a very popular option among my mother's generation for wedding outfits, usually a cream/ivory skirt suit type of thing.

Actually I'm having a dilemma myself about this as I have a biscuit/ivory coloured cocktail dress that my mother swears is wedding appropriate but I'm not so sure!

Several people have mentioned they wouldn't go near red, so I'm curious as to why red might be offensive at a wedding?

ETA - shopgirl, I'd love to see a picture of your red dress, it sounds beautiful!

 

[Deelight]

I have never heard the red thing either

, white yes and black (though the black rule is now fading) but never red.

Interesting

ETA: I would wear red and see no problems with it .

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Hmm I think it will be fine, but I concur with everyone else to check on the formality and make sure it matches. Other than that it sounds fine!

 

[swimmer]

The only time I thought red was a bit much (everyone else at the wedding did too) the mother of the groom was wearing a red sequined plunging to navel and yet slit up to the nether regions dress more appropriate for Vegas (on stage) than for an afternoon garden wedding in New Hampshire. Honestly, that is the only non-Brides' dress I have ever noticed at a wedding. Your dress sounds lovely, but if you are not comfy, go with something else. If you are comfy with it, do it. I hate questioning what I chose to wear to an event...you know?

Oh, and I bet your wedding is at Mystic Seaport. If it is, know that as of last summer, their reception space was not air conditioned. Could have changed...but man, that was sticky hot last August. At night the sea breeze picks up and you might want a shawl though.

 

[peridot83]

I don''t see why it WOULDN''T be fine. Guests (if they are the gossipy/catty type) always are making comments about the dresses that stand out, the dresses that are too low cut, the dresses that are too high cut etc.

Clearly the safest thing to wear to a nonblacktie formal reception is a pastel colored summer dress to the knees with a high neckline that does not match the bridesmaids colors. You won''t stand out, no one will make any comments.

So by wearing a red dress, it''s more eyecatching, it will attract more attention..but who cares. Your duty of dress code at a wedding should be to wear something APPROPRIATE not in white. Your duty is not to look as mousy and non-threatening as possible.

I faced this same problem when I wore a glossy pewter sheath dress. It was technically appropriate for an evening hotel reception, but I started to become concerned that I should have gotten something that would blend in more. I ended up wearing it, with red shoes no less, and while I did get more comments/stares...there was no way on earth I was taking attention away from the bride which is my only concern

So go for it!!!!

 

[bee*]

Date: 7/21/2008 10:39:17 AM
Author: Delster

Date: 7/21/2008 9:45:55 AM

Author: Fancy605

Date: 7/21/2008 9:31:02 AM

Author: OUpeargirl

The only color rules I have ever heard are don''t wear black or white.

Which is funny because now (well in my area at least) there are always droves of girls in black at weddings.

Yup, here too. Actually even cream/white/ivory is fine to a wedding in Ireland once it doesn''t look like a wedding dress or a bridesmaids'' dress. It''s a very popular option among my mother''s generation for wedding outfits, usually a cream/ivory skirt suit type of thing.


Actually I''m having a dilemma myself about this as I have a biscuit/ivory coloured cocktail dress that my mother swears is wedding appropriate but I''m not so sure!

Several people have mentioned they wouldn''t go near red, so I''m curious as to why red might be offensive at a wedding?

ETA - shopgirl, I''d love to see a picture of your red dress, it sounds beautiful!

I''ve never been to a wedding here where someones worn white or ivory-even the older generation. Maybe it''s a Dublin thing

 

[OUpearlgirl]

Date: 7/21/2008 9:45:55 AM
Author: Fancy605

Date: 7/21/2008 9:31:02 AM

Author: OUpeargirl

The only color rules I have ever heard are don''t wear black or white.

Which is funny because now (well in my area at least) there are always droves of girls in black at weddings.

Oh I see black at weddings all of the time, but my mom (who lives by the rules of proper etiquette) has always said it is not proper to wear all black to a wedding. She is very old fashioned though, and I realize it''s now acceptable.

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

My mom is probably wearing a black and red dress to my wedding and the groomsmen will have dark red shirts, I like red. Anyone wearing red would fit my color scheme.

The ONLY time I ever saw a problem with a red dress was with a MOB who was wearing a very revealing red dress. She wanted to be the center of attention away from her daughter and ended up picking up a guy 3 years older than her daughter''s husband

That''s a problem, what you describe is not.

 

[Delster]

Date: 7/21/2008 12:32:50 PM
Author: bee*

I've never been to a wedding here where someones worn white or ivory-even the older generation. Maybe it's a Dublin thing

I guess we culchies aren't big on the ol' etiquette!

Sounds like the consensus here is that red is fine unless (a) the bride is going to wear a red qipao, or (b) the dress is already inappropriate in style.

 

[julesbeth]

It sounds completely fine! Esp. since it isn''t very formal (or trashy! Plus it seems like your favorite option - and if its Tracy Reese I am sure its just darling! My mom is wearing black (black lace over a pink dress) to my wedding and I''ll bet someone will be wearing red. Why not!?

Post some pics, its sounds really cute!

 

[swimmer]

Date: 7/21/2008 2:19:02 PM
Author: brazen_irish_hussy


The ONLY time I ever saw a problem with a red dress was with a MOB who was wearing a very revealing red dress. She wanted to be the center of attention away from her daughter and ended up picking up a guy 3 years older than her daughter''s husband

That''s a problem, what you describe is not.

Hey Brazen,
Could we have attended the same wedding? I''m not sure if the MOG that I observed could have picked anyone up, she was stoned out of her mind except for when she ran up and down the aisle during the ceremony. The really amazing thing is that the bride and groom were staring so deeply into each others'' eyes they didn''t really notice her. Love is a more powerful drug than Vicodin apparently.

 

[bee*]

Date: 7/21/2008 3:58:29 PM
Author: Delster

Date: 7/21/2008 12:32:50 PM

Author: bee*


I''ve never been to a wedding here where someones worn white or ivory-even the older generation. Maybe it''s a Dublin thing

I guess we culchies aren''t big on the ol'' etiquette!

Sounds like the consensus here is that red is fine unless (a) the bride is going to wear a red qipao, or (b) the dress is already inappropriate in style.

lol! Maybe it''s just us dubs

I think that red would be perfect though.

 

[shop_girl]

Sounds like the consensus here is that red is fine unless (a) the bride is going to wear a red qipao, or (b) the dress is already inappropriate in style.

LOL, Looks like red dress it is....
Definetly appropriate for time/place of the wedding and is in no way low cut or too sexy...

Thanks for all your input.

 

[tberube]

Why not? Nothing wrong with a red dress at a wedding.