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Wedding Please critique my invitation wording =)

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goldenstar

Brilliant_Rock
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I would like to include all the parents'' names on the invitation. Everyone is contributing equally (both sets of parents and us). My parents are divorced and my mom still uses my dad''s last name. Neither of my parents are remarried.

This is what I came up with:

Bride First Middle Lastname
and
Groom First Middle Lastname

together with their parents
Mom Maidenname Lastname (my mom)
Dad Lastname (my dad)
Mom and Dad Lastname (FI''s parents)

invite you to share in the celebration of their marriage
on DAY
YEAR
at TIME
LOCATION
ADDRESS
CITY, STATE


What do you think? Does it sound awkward or improper? Is it okay that I put the parents in a list format? I played around with "and" and it didn''t look great.

I omitted the Mr., Ms. and Mrs. because I thought it looked more clean without them.



Thanks in advance!
 
I think that works nicely, it covers all of your bases.

I did the following, BUT my dad was deceased, my mom remarried and SHE was paying for the whole thing...so keep that in mind...

Mr and Mrs Frederick Jones (my mom and step dad)

request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of her daughter

Caroline Smith (me, with my maiden name)

to

Frank Blake

son of

Mr and Mrs Steven Blake

now, this pissed of my mother in law NO END as she informed me very haughtily that she was NOT MRS ANYONE, but she was SUSAN BLAKE. So on a formal invite I should use the proper format. Also, she wanted her name up top and we were told that that indicated who was hosting (paying) for the wedding. As they were not paying ONE DIME I felt this was fine, as many traditional invites did not used to have the parents of the groom listed, and I did it as a courtesy to him and his parents and their guests.

You could also put their names first, and then say, together with their children (your names) invite you...

I see nothing wrong with your way, as it highlights all the players involved and it is clear.
 
Thanks Diamondfan!

I wanted to show that everyone is hosting and that my parents aren''t married and FI''s are. I felt that omitting the titles shows fairness to all. Everyone''s first and last names are in there. So far so good...
 
Looks good! List structure on the parents is correct. Invite line is nice. The ordering (bridal couple first, parents in the middle) is perfectly proper, if slightly more awkward than the traditional order, but as good as you can do for the 6 cohosts (bride, groom, and 4 parents.)

Just checking - have you considered just listing the four parents as the only hosts, and leaving you and your FI as just bride and groom? Obviously you want to list both sets of parents together as hosts for parity reasons if they are all contributing, but you do not have to include yourselves as hosts structurally on the invite unless you want to. It does flow just slightly better to do:

Mom Bride
Dad Bride
Mom and Dad Groom
invite you to celebrate the marriage of their children
Bride
and
Groom
on Day blah blah...

But if you want to use the "together with" phrasing and give yourself top billing, that also works well
2.gif
and don't let me stop you!
 
Thanks Cara!

I figure that if FI and I have top billing no one else can complain about where they are listed.
31.gif
 
One more question-- does 5:00pm count as afternoon or evening?
 
I''m not sure which is technically correct, but I''d say that anything from 6:00 PM and on is considered evening, but 5:00 could be considered the afternoon.


ETA: Found on weddingbee:

"Here is the traditional rule: it is 5 o''clock in the afternoon. actually, technically, anything up to and including 5:59 pm is afternoon, 6pm begins evening.
Also- if you are putting a time like one o''clock or two o''clock technically you don''t even having to put in the afternoon at all because no one would be confused at what time you were having it. however, apparently 8pm, 9pm, or 10pm, you need to write "in the evening" (who gets married at 8am??)"



 
This is probably totally wrong, or else the etiquette experts would have already caught it, but to me, it seems like when listing the families, there should be something like "and" to separate your families...

Bride Mom Maiden Last
Bride Dad Last
and
Groom Mom and Dad Last
 
Date: 8/15/2008 6:30:40 AM
Author: ZoeBartlett

I''m not sure which is technically correct, but I''d say that anything from 6:00 PM and on is considered evening, but 5:00 could be considered the afternoon.


ETA: Found on weddingbee:

''Here is the traditional rule: it is 5 o''clock in the afternoon. actually, technically, anything up to and including 5:59 pm is afternoon, 6pm begins evening.

Also- if you are putting a time like one o''clock or two o''clock technically you don''t even having to put in the afternoon at all because no one would be confused at what time you were having it. however, apparently 8pm, 9pm, or 10pm, you need to write ''in the evening'' (who gets married at 8am??)''




Zoe is correct. I used to be trained to order wedding invitations, and anything after 6pm was considered evening, and 6pm is in fact the most formal time to get married at in the evening (noon is the same for daytime).
 
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