violet02
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2007
- Messages
- 2,201
So after the bacheorette debacle and got help from someone to do all the printing on our DIY programs... I find out two days after we printed everything that the best man is not coming. Okay so it''s only one page and I was able to re-print it and we hadn''t assembled them yet so all was not lost there. But who the heck ditches out on a wedding the week before?
Previously I had mentioned his health issues and I said that of course his health came above all else. So he didn''t go to the bachelor party. That was totally ok. He''s better now but depressed about life I guess... ok that happens too. The part we''re really disappointed about was that he went back east to stay with his family over a week ago and didn''t return my FI''s calls all week. Then finally a few days ago he gets a call back, not saying that we should prepare for the worst... just in case. Wow. We already we''re getting the vibe that he may duck out a couple of weeks ago but to not return calls for a week then one week before the wedding say we MAY need to prepare for the worst? It''s particularly a bummer for my FI who''s supported him over the last six plus months through his life, health, relationship and job issues. He''s been there for him on call 24/7. Anyways, we moved a groomsmen up to best man, got another friend to jump in and we recovered quickly! I even got monogram market to quickly monogram a new handkerchief for our new groomsmen. We got lucky I guess that it was the week before not the week of.
So now I''m dealing with a ''situation'' with my stepmother. It all started when word got to me that my stepbrother was having my stepmom bring her 1ct RB diamond right hand ring (which was originally an engagement ring from his dad) to the wedding. I guess he''s planning on proposing to his girlfriend... (big age diff, he''s 26 she''s maybe 22?). That spun out into some assumptions that he may propose at the wedding... it got a bit out of control. I think my dad was freaking out about it more than anything. Add to that that we''ve already paid our florist bill and my stepmother has requested that we get said girlfriend a corsage. Even though we only got them for immediate family. She then grilled me about who was on my list for bouts and then wanted to know why my cousin was on there... i said well we grew up together i consider him my brother. I can''t believe i had to explain myself. So my planner, my friends, my florist all said look dont get the corsage just forget about it. My stepmom was really worked up about it. It was really disappointing because we''ve always had a tenuous relationship but I thought we were working on things and her whole thing about making my stepbrothers gf feel like part of the family made me feel like she didn''t give a crap that she was coming to our wedding. She also complained about why my stepbro and his gf were invited to the rehearsal dinner and what part of the ceremony is my stepbrother participating in? HUH?
Anyways my dad tried to reason with her and finally I called my stepbrother. We''re not close per se... I explained to him about the situation with the ring... he was embarassed, he didn''t know you could insure and ship jewelry so he apologized for any implication there.It made me feel good that he said he respected that it was our day and that he was there to support us. I said it''s okay that was more other people getting hysterical about it. My planner was ready to tackle him if he approached a mic! hehe. I also told him about the corsage situation and about why he gets a bout... he was like whats that? I said a flower you get to wear on your jacket! He''s like oh i get one, thats cool! So like they even give a crap about a corsage. He said it was out of hand and he''d talk to his mom I said eh don''t bother if you don''t want to. It did feel good to connect with him and talk at least, that was positive.
So I was pretty dead set on no corsage... then today I was thinking I should probably do it. (which means my cousins bf/fiance gets one too to be fair). The reason is she''s very passive agressive and honestly she may seem ok about no corsage now (apparently my stepbro called her and she calmed down) but she''ll internalize that and get me back for it later. As awful as that sounds. So I talked to my dad and said I will probably do it, and I explained why. He was overjoyed... and I felt bad for him. I said dad, you''re overjoyed because she was gonna make you pay for it too in the long run.. he didnt have much to say to that. Blah! Anyways, she needs someone to usher her up the aisle so my planner and I said might as well have my stepbrother do it.
This was the biggest disappointment though. She went on and on about how she had asked for nothing the whole wedding but she had to have this corsage. She''s so tunnel vision when it comes to her son, I thought for this one occasion she could give it a rest. Even with my dad explaining to her how that made us feel... she could give a crap. It makes me very sad too.. she''ll be walking in as the mother of the bride... makes me really wish my own mom could be here more than ever.
Previously I had mentioned his health issues and I said that of course his health came above all else. So he didn''t go to the bachelor party. That was totally ok. He''s better now but depressed about life I guess... ok that happens too. The part we''re really disappointed about was that he went back east to stay with his family over a week ago and didn''t return my FI''s calls all week. Then finally a few days ago he gets a call back, not saying that we should prepare for the worst... just in case. Wow. We already we''re getting the vibe that he may duck out a couple of weeks ago but to not return calls for a week then one week before the wedding say we MAY need to prepare for the worst? It''s particularly a bummer for my FI who''s supported him over the last six plus months through his life, health, relationship and job issues. He''s been there for him on call 24/7. Anyways, we moved a groomsmen up to best man, got another friend to jump in and we recovered quickly! I even got monogram market to quickly monogram a new handkerchief for our new groomsmen. We got lucky I guess that it was the week before not the week of.
So now I''m dealing with a ''situation'' with my stepmother. It all started when word got to me that my stepbrother was having my stepmom bring her 1ct RB diamond right hand ring (which was originally an engagement ring from his dad) to the wedding. I guess he''s planning on proposing to his girlfriend... (big age diff, he''s 26 she''s maybe 22?). That spun out into some assumptions that he may propose at the wedding... it got a bit out of control. I think my dad was freaking out about it more than anything. Add to that that we''ve already paid our florist bill and my stepmother has requested that we get said girlfriend a corsage. Even though we only got them for immediate family. She then grilled me about who was on my list for bouts and then wanted to know why my cousin was on there... i said well we grew up together i consider him my brother. I can''t believe i had to explain myself. So my planner, my friends, my florist all said look dont get the corsage just forget about it. My stepmom was really worked up about it. It was really disappointing because we''ve always had a tenuous relationship but I thought we were working on things and her whole thing about making my stepbrothers gf feel like part of the family made me feel like she didn''t give a crap that she was coming to our wedding. She also complained about why my stepbro and his gf were invited to the rehearsal dinner and what part of the ceremony is my stepbrother participating in? HUH?
Anyways my dad tried to reason with her and finally I called my stepbrother. We''re not close per se... I explained to him about the situation with the ring... he was embarassed, he didn''t know you could insure and ship jewelry so he apologized for any implication there.It made me feel good that he said he respected that it was our day and that he was there to support us. I said it''s okay that was more other people getting hysterical about it. My planner was ready to tackle him if he approached a mic! hehe. I also told him about the corsage situation and about why he gets a bout... he was like whats that? I said a flower you get to wear on your jacket! He''s like oh i get one, thats cool! So like they even give a crap about a corsage. He said it was out of hand and he''d talk to his mom I said eh don''t bother if you don''t want to. It did feel good to connect with him and talk at least, that was positive.
So I was pretty dead set on no corsage... then today I was thinking I should probably do it. (which means my cousins bf/fiance gets one too to be fair). The reason is she''s very passive agressive and honestly she may seem ok about no corsage now (apparently my stepbro called her and she calmed down) but she''ll internalize that and get me back for it later. As awful as that sounds. So I talked to my dad and said I will probably do it, and I explained why. He was overjoyed... and I felt bad for him. I said dad, you''re overjoyed because she was gonna make you pay for it too in the long run.. he didnt have much to say to that. Blah! Anyways, she needs someone to usher her up the aisle so my planner and I said might as well have my stepbrother do it.
This was the biggest disappointment though. She went on and on about how she had asked for nothing the whole wedding but she had to have this corsage. She''s so tunnel vision when it comes to her son, I thought for this one occasion she could give it a rest. Even with my dad explaining to her how that made us feel... she could give a crap. It makes me very sad too.. she''ll be walking in as the mother of the bride... makes me really wish my own mom could be here more than ever.
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