Wedding Not sure what to do (ceremony/venue question).

[Keepingthefaith21]

My FI and I are getting married at a museum which doesn’t afford us the option of a fantastic ceremony location.The Great Hall, which is where our reception will be taking place, will not be usable prior to the reception because I want to give the caterers a solid two hours to set up.There is a perfectly fine room available for our use – but there is no ability for me to have an entrance with my father (no aisle to walk down).I waffle between accepting that I won’t get to walk the aisle with my dad and feeling disappointed by it.

I found a chapel about 20 mins from our venue which would suit us.I had thought of renting this and having the ceremony start a bit earlier but because it would be increasing our budget with yet another rental fee and the addition of transportation I had cut this idea out completely.I revised the general schedule for the day of and decided that things would work especially if our party arrived a bit early to do photographs before the wedding.I could eliminate a cocktail hour by arranging photos prior to the ceremony (I want to see FI before the ceremony and get photos of us seeing each other for the first time) which would save us almost an hour of time.

Yesterday my mom called to tell me that she and my father have decided to increase the budget to allow for us to add the chapel and transportation into the equation.Now I feel like I can’t figure out how to make the timing work if we were to take my parents up on their more than generous offer.We will not have time to go to the museum before the chapel and as a result we will need to hold a cocktail hour so that we are able to take pictures at the reception hall (which has some amazing opportunities for great photographs).By brining cocktail hour back again, I feel like I land in the same tight timeline I had originally been trying to avoid.

I know that my father wants the traditional aisle walk with me and I feel like declining their offer may be misunderstood.Should I sit down and try to mess around with new possibilities for an off site ceremony or should I just leave the schedule the way I have it outlined now?

My wedding is over a year away so I do have some time to play with ideas.However, the chapel does book quickly so I would like to book it ASAP if I am going to.Also the cost associated with having a cocktail hour is not an issue.If we found ourselves eliminating one it’s just a small bonus savings.

 

[sunnyd]

Hmmm. So the choices are either miss the walk down the aisle in favor of pics prior to the ceremony at the museum, or add back a cocktail hour to a tight schedule because you''d now have to do pics after the ceremony. Oy!

Would it be possible to transport yourselves to the museum before the ceremony for pics, to the chapel for the ceremony, then back to the museum for the reception? That seems like a way to get everything you want (if I understand it correctly). That''s a toughy!

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

Date: 10/14/2008 6:25:51 PM
Author: sunnyd

Would it be possible to transport yourselves to the museum before the ceremony for pics, to the chapel for the ceremony, then back to the museum for the reception? That seems like a way to get everything you want (if I understand it correctly). That''s a toughy!

I did think of that. I am keeping the idea on the back burner. The only problem I see with that is the museum is open to the public that day until 4 PM. So there''s a possibility there will be people milling about and although I personally do not care about that, I''m worried the museum would find it too distracting to their visitors.

 

[Allison D.]

KTF, when we spoke a few weeks ago, I got the sense that you really are quite close to your father.

For that reason alone, I wouldn''t lightly give up the opportunity to walk down an aisle with him. Not only might you regret it, he absolutely might.

My sister got married overseas - they eloped. I don''t think she realized the disappointment my dad would feel at having not had the chance to walk her down the aisle.

I didn''t realize he was disappointed, either, until I got married. I never considered anything other than having my dad walk me, and it was only when we discussed it that I learned it meant so much to him and how he felt he missed it for my sister.

Timelines can always be adjusted; venues can always be massaged....but that opportunity won''t come again. Once it''s gone, it''s gone. If you''re already suspecting you''d regret bypassing it, chances are you really will.