need your opinion please ...how would you feel?

[zhuzhu]

Solution to the ring problem:
Make him take the ring back and buy another one that is bigger and better than the original one. Only then you will reconsider marrying him.

Solution to the problem that you don''t want to think about:
Kick his ass out of your life. He is toxic!

 

[chiapet]

I''m just echoing what most people have saying here: RUN!!! In fact, SPRINT! Tons of red flags just from what little you''ve shared here.
Please learn from me: I divorced the loser that I was married. He also lived with me rent free and I paid for most everything. He''s a wannabe actor/comedian. I wish someone had warned me before I married him because I now have to pay HUGE legal fees for my divorce.
Just my opinion: please think twice before marrying this guy.

 

[steph72276]

Oh dear....I just feel sad for you that you think that is all you''re worth.

 

[blueroses]

If this is indeed a real situation, then:

Run. FAST.

I spent over 10 years in a relationship in which I was NEVER the first priority, and was NEVER going to be. It will NOT change.

 

[absolut_blonde]

Date: 5/12/2009 8:36:56 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
I agree with everyone who told you to ''run''.

I know you don''t want advice...and I can see why you wouldn''t...shining a light on a situation can be uncomfortable. But, listen...you''re marrying a man who replaced you in a single night...and you''re worried about him replacing a ring. In my honest opinion, you''re priorities are skewed. You are valuing things over the important stuff...like commitment, monogamy, self respect, and so so so much more.

Right now, you''re a sugar mama. You pay his way through life...and he thinks so little of you that you could have an argument and he could move on to another woman in a snap. That''s not right...no matter how you break it down. That speaks volumes about your relationship.

My best advice...I would seriously get into counseling...find yourself...and then finds someone who will love you and treat you with respect.

Hugely agree with ALL of this. Counseling is a fantastic idea.

I''m sorry, but your SO sounds like a total loser. And I don''t say that lightly - I''m pretty live and let live, but this boy is USING you. No self-respecting FEMALE-respecting *man* would behave this way. You deserve better than this.

 

[jaylex]

Date: 5/12/2009 1:41:49 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no he doesnt help out with bills and such but he does help me with my kids at times when i have to work and i cant get them to where they need to go. he is a good guy, we have fun and make each other laugh...i was just hurt by the replacement ring not being the same as the orginal

Sorry to be blunt but Dump the Chump but hire him as a nanny. You will still be paying his bills (indirectly) but at least you''ll be getting something out of it! It''ll probably cost you less money and definitely less heartaches in the long run.

You deserve better.
I''m sure you could find someone who will value you enough to take some REAL pride in choosing your wedding ring.

And when you do find that person, bring your "nanny" ex along to enjoy in the "fun" and "make you laugh"

problem solved.

 

[jaylex]

Date: 5/12/2009 6:24:16 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 5/12/2009 6:22:52 PM
Author: luckystar112
I love threads like this. You know, threads that start out with some long, shocking, melodramatic story and then end with, ''But I''m not really looking for advice on that. Should I get the H VS2 or the E SI1?

''

In any case, I really have nothing to say. I agree with everyone else about your relationship.

If it were real, it''s not a relationship. It''s a sinkingship.

*try Relationsh!t ! props to Dane Cook!

 

[Kelli]

Um.... I know you said you didn''t need opinions on why you''re marrying this guy, but I just CANNOT keep my mouth shut!!! Are you insane?!?! What is a strong independant woman like you doing with this complete free-loading loser? There is no way in HELL, HEAVEN, OR EARTH I''d marry someone that thought I wasn''t as imoprtant as some gadgets for his car. And he needs you to pay for his gym membership and TANNING??? Ummmm. wow. (shakes head in disbelief and sadness).

 

[VRBeauty]

Date: 5/12/2009 5:43:21 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no i swear nothing is made up. i guess when you see it in black and white it makes you feel like a big idiot. so guess i am a big idiot!!!

In all honesty Monica... I believe you in spite of what I posted earlier. And I don''t think you''re an idiot.

It''s just that when someone starts their post with something like:

First let me say I dont need opinions on why am i still with this guy or why are we marrying, i just need to know if i am in the wrong about how i am feeling...

it tells me that they''re not ready to listen to anything anyone else is going to say about their guy etc. anyway, so why bother?

As you''ve probably figured out by now, Pricescope is a really, really caring community, which is why a lot of people added warnings and their own, hard-earned wisdom even though you pretty much announced that you''d be ignoring them.

If your post is for real, I hope you''ll listen to what they have to say... To paraphrase what some wise person somewhere once said, idiocy is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results.

And... if so many of us are wrong, if you''re posting out of boredom (

) or testing some thesis... well,

snap! May all your diamonds look like frozen spit!

 

[trillionaire]

OP obviously wants another child, not a man or FF. Is this the type of example you want to set for your children??????? Sheesh girl, you need to love yourself better.

Maybe no one has ever mentioned this to you, but men in love take longer to get over relationships than women do... any man who hops in the sack with some chick in less than 24 hours after a break up is "JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU".

If the only thing in your story that you are mad about is the RING, then wow... Clearly I need some of whatever you are smoking, because it must be REALLY strong...

 

[honey22]

Date: 5/12/2009 1:41:49 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no he doesnt help out with bills and such but he does help me with my kids at times when i have to work and i cant get them to where they need to go. he is a good guy, we have fun and make each other laugh...i was just hurt by the replacement ring not being the same as the orginal

Putting all your other issues aside, you threw the ring in the gutter, it got damaged, and not you are complaining about the replacement ring he bought you? If you didn''t want a lesser ring, you shouldn''t have thrown it in the gutter!

The ring is the least of your worries at the moment, you need to sort out everything else before you start worrying about the ring.

 

[AdiS]

Date: 5/13/2009 3:29:50 AM
Author: honey22

Date: 5/12/2009 1:41:49 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no he doesnt help out with bills and such but he does help me with my kids at times when i have to work and i cant get them to where they need to go. he is a good guy, we have fun and make each other laugh...i was just hurt by the replacement ring not being the same as the orginal

Putting all your other issues aside, you threw the ring in the gutter, it got damaged, and not you are complaining about the replacement ring he bought you? If you didn''t want a lesser ring, you shouldn''t have thrown it in the gutter!

The ring is the least of your worries at the moment, you need to sort out everything else before you start worrying about the ring.

quote: "i got upset and asked him to leave again. he said fine give me back the ring. i did and he threw it down the pavement where it ended up getting ran over and ruined." She didn''t throw anything anywhere. Just pointing out.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

WoodslandMonica, I didn''t realize that you have children...

Now, more so than even before, I beg you to please, please, please get the heck out of dodge! You are setting a terrible example for your babies. Children learn about healthy relationships from their parents.

 

[kama_s]

She''s definitely a troll.

If you aren''t, I just gotta say, a big part of being an independant woman is standing up for yourself.

 

[LadyBlue]

He is 24, and not because you are 3 years older than him, that means you have to acto like his mom, and provide for everything. Maybe he is not a bad guy, but he is really happy in comfortable being acting as a kinf and you his servant. I will not be totally sure if he wants to marry you for your money or because he loves you. I will totally ask him to act as a man, as you partner, as your fiance, and start helping with all the expenses, and equal situation, and if after that he still wants to be with you, then i will consider to still marry him.

So for now, ask for a big diamond, for rent, food, groceries, etc etc.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 5/13/2009 3:29:50 AM
Author: honey22

Date: 5/12/2009 1:41:49 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no he doesnt help out with bills and such but he does help me with my kids at times when i have to work and i cant get them to where they need to go. he is a good guy, we have fun and make each other laugh...i was just hurt by the replacement ring not being the same as the orginal

Putting all your other issues aside, you threw the ring in the gutter, it got damaged, and not you are complaining about the replacement ring he bought you? If you didn''t want a lesser ring, you shouldn''t have thrown it in the gutter!

The ring is the least of your worries at the moment, you need to sort out everything else before you start worrying about the ring.

Yup. Every bit as mature as the boy toy, no?

 

[grapegravity]

Date: 5/13/2009 2:05:39 PM
Author: gaby06
He is 24, and not because you are 3 years older than him, that means you have to acto like his mom, and provide for everything. Maybe he is not a bad guy, but he is really happy in comfortable being acting as a kinf and you his servant. I will not be totally sure if he wants to marry you for your money or because he loves you. I will totally ask him to act as a man, as you partner, as your fiance, and start helping with all the expenses, and equal situation, and if after that he still wants to be with you, then i will consider to still marry him.

So for now, ask for a big diamond, for rent, food, groceries, etc etc.

she''s 32....

 

[D&T]

didn''t read everyone''s post, But i think the ring is the last you should worry about, first work on the guy & relationship, a ring is just a ring- a piece of jewelry if the relationship is not behind the meaning of the ring is all I''m saying

 

[Camille]

I know it''s hard to be alone, shouldn''t be buying company, those kids need a real Mom you know? Maybe a good time to call Dr Laura?

 

[lexychoo]

This sounds like some kind of awful soap opera!! I hope you are a troll and that this is not real. If so, I would feel so bad for you. That does not sound like a healthy relationship. Plus, he cheats! E-rings are important but they are not that important.

 

[DiamondFlame]

Tell you what, sell his car. Buy yourself a nice bling bling. Then kick the freeloading loser out of your life and down the very pavement where he threw your ring. With any luck, he too wd get run over. Would make for a nice tan colored pavement... and no tanning bills either.

 

[kindred]

Date: 5/12/2009 5:51:56 PM
Author:woodlandsmonica
First let me say I dont need opinions on why am i still with this guy or why are we marrying, i just need to know if i am in the wrong about how i am feeling...

Honestly, I cannot believe you expect people to ignore all the crazy relationship stuff you just posted. This poster almost seems like a troll.

If you can''t see that you need to get the H*** away from this person as fast as you can, nothing anybody here can say will help you.

 

[zhuzhu]

Why would anyone be willing to put up with losers like that guy is beyond me....

 

[pyramid]

When you meet a good man you will realise how wrong this relationship is - I am speaking from experience. I was hung up over a ring which was poor quality and my ex-husband didn't care one iota, he was the type to go off with a woman too and without being split up. I also felt the sentiments of a wedding ring and engagement ring should be precious and represent your love and caring, however it never represented such a thing for that relationship. Don't love someone more than they love you; never ever!!!!!!

I would leave him NOW!

 

[kittybean]

Honestly, at this point I am hoping the OP is a troll, because this is one of the saddest, most ridiculous stories I''ve ever encountered.

 

[honey22]

Date: 5/13/2009 6:06:17 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 5/13/2009 3:29:50 AM
Author: honey22

Date: 5/12/2009 1:41:49 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no he doesnt help out with bills and such but he does help me with my kids at times when i have to work and i cant get them to where they need to go. he is a good guy, we have fun and make each other laugh...i was just hurt by the replacement ring not being the same as the orginal

Putting all your other issues aside, you threw the ring in the gutter, it got damaged, and not you are complaining about the replacement ring he bought you? If you didn''t want a lesser ring, you shouldn''t have thrown it in the gutter!

The ring is the least of your worries at the moment, you need to sort out everything else before you start worrying about the ring.

quote: ''i got upset and asked him to leave again. he said fine give me back the ring. i did and he threw it down the pavement where it ended up getting ran over and ruined.'' She didn''t throw anything anywhere. Just pointing out.

I do beg your pardon, I honestly misread this point.

With my recent enlightenment, I say dump him and get yourself a nice ring

 

[loriken214]

Date: 5/12/2009 10:19:15 PM
Author: blueroses
If this is indeed a real situation, then:

Run. FAST.

I spent over 10 years in a relationship in which I was NEVER the first priority, and was NEVER going to be. It will NOT change.

Me, too, and I pitty anyone who would WILLINGLY allow herself to continue in a "relationship" like that! RUN, FAST....and buy yourself an amazing RHR!

Lori

 

[loriken214]

Date: 5/12/2009 6:15:40 PM
Author: Dancing Fire
paid for his tanning?? stick that turkey in the oven and turn it to broil, he''ll get a nice tan alright.

GO DF....GOOD ONE!!!

Lori

 

[loriken214]

Date: 5/12/2009 5:17:44 PM
Author: HornAround
edited to not feed the troll....

HA.....WHAT is your avatar????

Lori

 

[AdiS]

Date: 5/14/2009 3:26:41 AM
Author: honey22

Date: 5/13/2009 6:06:17 AM
Author: AdiS

Date: 5/13/2009 3:29:50 AM
Author: honey22

Date: 5/12/2009 1:41:49 PM
Author: woodlandsmonica
no he doesnt help out with bills and such but he does help me with my kids at times when i have to work and i cant get them to where they need to go. he is a good guy, we have fun and make each other laugh...i was just hurt by the replacement ring not being the same as the orginal

Putting all your other issues aside, you threw the ring in the gutter, it got damaged, and not you are complaining about the replacement ring he bought you? If you didn''t want a lesser ring, you shouldn''t have thrown it in the gutter!

The ring is the least of your worries at the moment, you need to sort out everything else before you start worrying about the ring.

quote: ''i got upset and asked him to leave again. he said fine give me back the ring. i did and he threw it down the pavement where it ended up getting ran over and ruined.'' She didn''t throw anything anywhere. Just pointing out.

I do beg your pardon, I honestly misread this point.

With my recent enlightenment, I say dump him and get yourself a nice ring

Well, not that it matters, really. I agree the ring is the least of her worries. She''s either a troll with more free time on her hands than it''s obviously healthy for her mind, or a woman with morbidly low self-esteem. Either way, she needs to get a grip, IMO.