Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats :)

[innerkitten]

My MIL got a dog a few days ago. She spends a lot of time at our house on weekends so the dog will probably be coming with her a lot. Last night the dog came over for the first time and things were a little tense. The dog mostly ignored the cats expect once when one of the cats come up to him and smelled his nose. Then he growled and the cat hissed and I separated them before anything else could happen. Other than that my black cat walked around the house puffed up and making weird sounds.

Any ideas for helping them ease into this new situation? They don't have to be best friends but I don't want anyone to get hurt either.

The dog is pretty mellow and very good with my 6 year old. It's a 9 year old rescue pomeranian. Kind of big for it's breed. Looks more like a fox to me.

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

Your house is your cats territory. It's their home and they need to feel safe. You can try to bribe them to good behavior. But if you over correct them for doing what is natural (protecting their territory) don't be surprised if one of them starts leaving you smelly presents.

How good is your MIL with her dog? It's her animal and she should be the one correcting it's behavior. If you do it they will only associate you and your cats negatively. But if she can do it through praise and correction the dog will be motivation to learn. It needs to learn to not react when the cats come up to it as long as it's not being attacked or hit (and then it needs to learn to go over to mom and hide).

I don't see why it's your problem at all. Honestly I love dogs, but their owners tick me off by assuming their dogs will be welcome anywhere and everywhere. You house is your cat's home. If she wants to bring her dog over she needs to make sure it behaves correctly. If it can't, it gets left outside (perfectly fine for short visits as long as it's not 100 or below freezing with no shelter or water) or it gets left at home in the kennel.

 

[movie zombie]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

i don't take my cats to anyone else's house and they'd better not bring their dogs and/or cats to mine........

not fair to your cats, innerkitten, to lock them up in a room if she comes to visit with her dog. the dog scent in areas they've been removed from may initiate a spraying problem: and yes female cats can take to this activity although it is usually males. you really don't want that!

best thing to do is to set the ground rules now: i won't bring my cats to your house and you don't bring your dog to mine. i love you dearly and think resueing this little beastie was a great thing to do but my house my rules, your house your rules.

good luck!

 

[Enerchi]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

I also agree with Gypsy and MZ - this is your house and it belongs to your cats. Your MIL is a guest and should not expect her dog will automatically be welcomed - and I encourage you not to let it start. One time is all it will take to set a precedent! We have dogs and we do NOT travel with them nor bring them to visit friends. Its just not something we would consider - that the dogs would be welcome, or that we would even consider taking them. Our dogs are happy in their crates when we are out. It removes any stress for us of always being 'on duty' wondering what the dog could be doing, where is it going, does it have to go out, is it mixing well with other pets, etc.

I think like MZ says - set the ground rules now that you love your MIL but please leave the dog at home when you visit. And, lordy lordy, you sure don't want to get any cat spray habit started!!!

 

[innerkitten]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

Thanks for the answers. How long is it okay for a dog to be left along at home? I know for cats 6 or so hours is nothing. But what about dogs?

I do like Rufus and I was hoping the cats would feel the same. But I know they are sensitive animals and naturally territorial. I guess worst case scenario the dog could hang out in the yard ( which he might actually enjoy ) if things were too weird and my MIL needed to pass through here with the dog for some reason.

I do think that some some sort of behavioral training for the dog might be good idea for the growling. I have no idea how to train a dog and I don't think my MIL does either because she is a first time dog owner. But I will talk to her about it.

 

[innerkitten]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

I also agree with Gypsy and MZ - this is your house and it belongs to your cats. Your MIL is a guest and should not expect her dog will automatically be welcomed - and I encourage you not to let it start. One time is all it will take to set a precedent! We have dogs and we do NOT travel with them nor bring them to visit friends. Its just not something we would consider - that the dogs would be welcome, or that we would even consider taking them. Our dogs are happy in their crates when we are out. It removes any stress for us of always being 'on duty' wondering what the dog could be doing, where is it going, does it have to go out, is it mixing well with other pets, etc.

I think like MZ says - set the ground rules now that you love your MIL but please leave the dog at home when you visit. And, lordy lordy, you sure don't want to get any cat spray habit started!!!

Omg no, I really don't want cat spray in my house. My cats are very good and never go anywhere except the cat box.

 

[movie zombie]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

if you do have a yard that could be an option.....but please do trust me! you do NOT want the cats to start spraying....once they start its almost impossible to stop....much less the odor which is almost if not impossible to remove.

can she get to the yard through a side gate? [hahahahaha, yes, i know in SF one is lucky to have a yard but a side gate?! hahahahahaha].

 

[Enerchi]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

When our dogs were puppies, the rule of thumb then was 1 hour for each month old they were - so 4 months old, 4 hours, etc. Now, they are 10 and 6, so they can go all day in their crates (8am to 4pm) and no problems. They pretty much just sleep all day anyway. I'd really strongly suggest your MIL gets a crate - as the dog is an older dog but new to her, she doesn't know its limits but when they are crated, this becomes their den and they will not soil their den/home. Later on, as they grow to know each other, he may not need the crate, but I'd use it for the first few months of dog ownership...

Look up dog trainers in the yellow pages (whoa! do they still print yellow pages or is everything on line now???) but call around and ask for trainers and then ... GET REFERENCES!!! Talk to other people who have used the trainer - they are NOT all the same!

Good luck! You sound very sensible and practical about this - and you are protecting your cats territory - they will be appreciative, I'm sure!

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

Trainers are like appraisers. Good ones are few and far between. Definitely get references, make sure they know how to work with first time dog owners. A LOT of dog training is owner training. Check Yelp. Check your local Vet for their opinion and your local shelter too. And those courses at Pet Smart don't count.

I've had good luck with dog trainers that have dogs they use for search and rescue. If you can find someone who does that with their own dogs, and also train give them a closer look and consider hiring them.


And yes. The dog will be fine outside for hours as long as there is shade, fresh water and decent weather.

 

[webdiva]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

The growling wasn't bad and shouldn't ever be corrected. It's the dogs way of setting boundaries. If they didn't actually start a fight, it may just be that they were both establishing boundaries and would then retreat to their own corners. I can understand your MIL wanting to bring the dog, since you're family and so is the dog. I would try it again and see how it goes. Have a spray bottle with water on hand to correct their behavior if any one of them step outta line.

Good luck!

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Re: Need tips on how to help dog in law get to know my cats

Hi Innerkitten, I think even irrelevant of the kitty issue, both your MIL and new pup would enjoy behavioral training classes together! It really helps with bonding and trust, which are so important with mature rescues.

A great trainer will facilitate two things: one, an understanding of commands (like sit/stay) in the dog so that the new pomeranian will understand to stay near his owner/your MIL while at your house; and two, your MIL will learn that her dog, once fully in tune to its master/mistress, will look to your MIL for signals whether the situation warrants calmness, agitation, anger, whatever.

It can work. My little dog has always been very playful and even rambunctious around my home, but has learned to either stick by my side when at my in-laws homes or play within eyesight of me if I give the go-ahead-- his behavior is soooooo very different. But then again, the signals *I* send as to what I expect from his behavior are different, too. Now, his breeder believed strongly in training all her puppies to be familiar with and respectful to cats so he came to me at 12 weeks already kitty-friendly so it's not exactly identical, but a parallel new experience was had when he was already a full grown dog: human babies. When everyone started having babies--something to which my dog had not been exposed in his first four years-- he was tentative at first; while the parents of the toddlers were busy saying "gentle, gentle" to their kids to encourage their human babies to interact appropriately with the dog, I was guiding my dog towards having a calm response to the normal sounds and motions of kids using the basic tenets of training.

Anyhow, wish you and your MIL best of luck with the transition!