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My Town's Crack Police Force!!!!!

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Amber St. Clare

Amber St. Clare

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 15, 2009
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1,709
So I've been getting obscene phone calls that register as "private" on our house phone. It doesn't happen every day, but it ALwAYS happens when my husband is not home. The man even knows my name. He has even asked me to meet him. I laugh at him and hang up. It's been going on for over two weeks, and a couple of days ago I called my local police department at my husband's request ...also, I was getting creeped out. Really. The guy knew who I was and knew when the husband wasn't home. Whenever I went out I was looking at the men I encountered with suspicious eyes--the mailman, the men at the local grocery, pharmacy, God forgive me, even the SO of a few female acquaintences...the man who was repairing my car, etc. The voice was very low but very distinctive with a slight accent....He is a mature man, not a teen looking for a laugh.

Anyway the police sent a patrolman out to the house. He took the info and even suggested that it might be a student from my job several years ago. I hadn't thought of that. Well, the next morning, the detective assigned to the case called me and told me the whole problem could be handled if I didn't pick up any calls that came thru as "private"!!!!

Case closed!?!
 
:eek: :eek:

Ahhh.... NO!

You should be able to answer any calls you want in your own home. EVEN if you wanted to ignore those calls.... the guy KNOWS when you are alone and who knows what else!!!

:nono: :nono:


I can't say I'm shocked to hear the response, but don't let them leave it at that.
 
Ugh, this is horrible, it's creepy as h@ll. :o

If he knows when you're home, then the obvious choice is one of your neighbors . . .

Most phone services have the option to block all call marked private, call your phone company ASAP. He may get tired of it if he can't contact you.

If he still gets through on your phone, buy an air horn and blow it in his ear every time he calls.

Don't fool around with this, this is not funny or light in any way. Most rapists (I'm sorry to say this, but it's true) have some form of contact with their victim before the crime. I also suggest purchasing a few cans of mace and placing them in strategic places in your home and car.

PLEASE take care of your self!
 
Have the police report handy when you call the phone company. "Private" isn't private for the phone company. They may be able to tell you or the police the actual owner of the phone number and issue a cease and desist order.

Hope this is resolved soon!
 
Call your detective back and REITERATE that the person KNOWS when your husband is not there. That's not just a private phone call. That's a stalker. Stalkers are dangerous.
 
iLander|1296074768|2833921 said:
Ugh, this is horrible, it's creepy as h@ll. :o

If he knows when you're home, then the obvious choice is one of your neighbors . . .

Most phone services have the option to block all call marked private, call your phone company ASAP. He may get tired of it if he can't contact you.

If he still gets through on your phone, buy an air horn and blow it in his ear every time he calls.

Don't fool around with this, this is not funny or light in any way. Most rapists (I'm sorry to say this, but it's true) have some form of contact with their victim before the crime. I also suggest purchasing a few cans of mace and placing them in strategic places in your home and car.

PLEASE take care of your self!
Click to expand...

Actual MACE mace is illegal. What you can get is pepper spray for bears. I have "pepper power." Keep sunglasses next to the cans b/c they'll block any spray from getting into your eyes. (ETA - keep a can in your house, in your purse, and also one in your car.)

Also, find some proper locks for your windows. Windows can be removed from the frames! Also, get an indoor lock or even switch out your lock incase the guy is a maintance worker or someone who has access to keys. (even if you own your home, change the locks just in case.)
 
For a bit of extra security at home, get dowels from the hardware store. (I think we use 1/2 or 3/4" diameter) They cost about $1 each and a half dozen can do all of your windows. Get a bigger one for any sliding doors too.

The dowels can block the windows from being forced open and also prevent the windows (this is also a problem in some sliding doors!!) from being lifted out of their tracks.


Pepper spray is a good idea. Also, keep your cell phone on you at ALL times just in case you need to call for help.
 
I'm surprised they didn't tell you to stick your fingers in your ears, close your eyes and go "na na na" to yourself. That'l solve the problem.
 
dragonfly411|1296075045|2833927 said:
Call your detective back and REITERATE that the person KNOWS when your husband is not there. That's not just a private phone call. That's a stalker. Stalkers are dangerous.
Click to expand...

Good point.


There's a HUGE difference between some college student (or former student) making calls as a joke and someone who knows your name, where you live, and is watching your house.
 
You can get tiny pepper spray that fits on a keychain as well. A friend of mine has one with her at all times. Be careful, and I hope the police get off their butts and do something about this ASAP!!
 
I would take this very seriously.
I'm not pro-gun but in this case I'd get one and take classes to learn how to use it well.

I'd also record this creep's voice (legal or not I wouldn't care)
I'd listen to that voice over and over and get to know it.
Tell your husband to do the same.

I'd also consider getting him to talk more while seeing if the call can be traced or if you can learn more about this guy.

If I wasn't happy with the police response I'd go over their heads.
Everyone's got a boss.
Whom do police report to? The mayor?

Would your local paper be interested in a story on local police incompetence? - perhaps that will light a fire under the PD.
 
I would almost wonder if it was your husband himself, except I wouldn't think he'd let you call the police if it was just him being a goofball.

I second calling the phone company to see who that number belongs to.

Stay safe!
 
kenny|1296077089|2833960 said:
I would take this very seriously.
I'm not pro-gun but in this case I'd get one and take classes to learn how to use it well.

I'd also record this creep's voice (legal or not I wouldn't care)
I'd listen to that voice over and over and get to know it.
Tell your husband to do the same.

I'd also consider getting him to talk more while seeing if the call can be traced or if you can learn more about this guy.

If I wasn't happy with the police response I'd go over their heads.
Everyone's got a boss.
Whom do police report to? The mayor?

Would your local paper be interested in a story on local police incompetence? - perhaps that will light a fire under the PD.
Click to expand...


You make some good suggestions here.

Speaking as a very pro-gun person, I think this is a good idea ONLY if you are comfortable with it (there are good basic safety and intro classes that are usually pretty cheap and might help you decide if you are comfortable or not before purchasing) and can commit to taking the classes and practicing regularly.
If you decide this is right for you, feel free to ask for advice -- I'd be happy to let you know what I thought of different handguns I've tried/own and (if you decide to carry) what I've learned about holsters.
 
So that does not happen to me, I became proactive. When I moved to town 6 years ago, I immediately went to the police department and did volunteer work. My town only has 3k people in it and has 15 police officers. I bring them cookies or cupcakes at least every other week. They all know me and my family well. They probably come by my home way more than others simply because I always give them refreshments. So when I do have issues (mostly with people who let their pets roam) they take care of me immediately. I have primed the pump, so if I did ever had this kind of issue, I could call the chief of police and I absolutely garentee it would be taken care of.
 
Something similar happened to my sister and I. My dad called the phone company and they said they weren't allowed to give out information on calls from a private number. He calmly explained that a man was calling when his teenage daughters were home alone and saying sexual things, and the girl at the phone company gave him the info. They have it...they're just not supposed to give it...
 
CUSO|1296079800|2834003 said:
So that does not happen to me, I became proactive. When I moved to town 6 years ago, I immediately went to the police department and did volunteer work. My town only has 3k people in it and has 15 police officers. I bring them cookies or cupcakes at least every other week. They all know me and my family well. They probably come by my home way more than others simply because I always give them refreshments. So when I do have issues (mostly with people who let their pets roam) they take care of me immediately. I have primed the pump, so if I did ever had this kind of issue, I could call the chief of police and I absolutely garentee it would be taken care of.
Click to expand...
While I'm sure the police enjoy the benefits of your proactive maneuvers, I'm not sure how helpful this advice is in this situation.

The police should take care of issues for every citizen, not just the ones that "prime the pump". They are not taking care of Amber St. Clare, who is in a serious situation, and it should not matter whether or not she has volunteered or baked for them. It's their job.

I must ask CUSO because I'm curious; do you take this same approach with other agencies or offices? The local hospital or the mayor for example? I imagine one would be snowed under with volunteering and baking endeavours, and not to mention the overdose of cupcakes and eager volunteers the cops/nurses/firemen etc would receive were all citizens to behave this way! I'm sure they wouldn't complain ;))
 
The police should take care of issues for every citizen, not just the ones that "prime the pump". They are not taking care of Amber St. Clare, who is in a serious situation, and it should not matter whether or not she has volunteered or baked for them. It's their job.

I must ask CUSO because I'm curious; do you take this same approach with other agencies or offices? The local hospital or the mayor for example? I imagine one would be snowed under with volunteering and baking endeavours, and not to mention the overdose of cupcakes and eager volunteers the cops/nurses/firemen etc would receive were all citizens to behave this way! I'm sure they wouldn't complain ;))[/quote]

The safety of my family is parmount. My 1st thought was that I just wanted the local police to know me and my family. I then figured if I scratched their back they would do the same for me. The probably deal with tons of scum bags every day with little thanks, very few people show genuine appreciation regularly, so I stand out, therefore get better service. Only good things can come from being friends with all of the police in your city.
 
kenny|1296081716|2834030 said:
CUSO|1296081410|2834024 said:
There are services that unblock #'s for a price. Here is an example http://www.trapcall.com
Click to expand...

And you found out about this, because, for, why? :Up_to_something:
Click to expand...

Because the OP asked and I researched. I want her to get the scum bag that is disrupting her life. I would be insane if it were happening to my wife.
 
I called the phone company and they wouldn't handle it until I called the police. Hence my call to them. He DID call one time when the husband was home--napping on the couch.

I have tried to place his voice. He is definitely NOT a teen looking for a thrill. But it is a distinctive, lower register voice that I have been TRYING to place.

Husband was LIVID when he heard the detective's simplistic answer. He's home due to inclement weather and we are going to the police station tomorow to talk to the detectives boss. He is not one to let things like this to blow in the wind. We have an alarm system and we calls me during the day to make sure I have it on. Honestly, I'm paranoid enough as it is-- I take no chances. I've read "the Gift of Fear" by Gavin de Becker--I take absolutely NO chances when it comes to my or my family's safety. I gave that book to all my female friends/relatives this past Christmas. I will not be a victim.
 
I tell every single woman: Lock your doors and windows, have a dog that barks, nosey neighbors, and a .38 that you have practiced with...
 
soberguy|1296083981|2834068 said:
I tell every single woman: Lock your doors and windows, have a dog that barks, nosey neighbors, and a .38 that you have practiced with...
Click to expand...

The best advice I ever heard. Just 1 thing, if someone tries entering your home that does not have the right, please please do not hesitate to shoot them dead. I live in TX and we can legally kill anyone trying to break into our home or our neighbors, or attacking us in our vehicle (as TX has said that our cars are an extension of our homes) I LOVE TX.
 
Amber St. Clare|1296083915|2834065 said:
I called the phone company and they wouldn't handle it until I called the police. Hence my call to them. He DID call one time when the husband was home--napping on the couch.

I have tried to place his voice. He is definitely NOT a teen looking for a thrill. But it is a distinctive, lower register voice that I have been TRYING to place.

Husband was LIVID when he heard the detective's simplistic answer. He's home due to inclement weather and we are going to the police station tomorow to talk to the detectives boss. He is not one to let things like this to blow in the wind. We have an alarm system and we calls me during the day to make sure I have it on. Honestly, I'm paranoid enough as it is-- I take no chances. I've read "the Gift of Fear" by Gavin de Becker--I take absolutely NO chances when it comes to my or my family's safety. I gave that book to all my female friends/relatives this past Christmas. I will not be a victim.
Click to expand...



Also keep this in mind. If this person is using a pre paid cell phone, you wont be able to trace it.
 
The advice to record these calls & listen to them again is excellent. The more you listen to them, the more familiar you'll be with the voice, even if you can't place whose it is. Then if you should hear it when someone talks to you -- a neighbor, repairman, whatever, you'll recognize it. That's invaluable.

I didn't realize phone co.'s could give out numbers without a subpoena. Maybe that's only unlisted ones, which we don't know whether this one is.

--- Laurie
 
Amber,
I'm sorry this is happening. I know exactly how you feel as this happened to me years ago...
Your phone company should have a code that you can dial after you receive the call that registers it as a harassment call. If you have filed a compliant with the police they should then be able to release the callers information to them. This is Verizon/NY's info on Unlawful Calls - http://www22.verizon.com/ResidentialHelp/Phone/General+Support/Support+Tools/General/95622.htm.... I would definitly call them back now that you have spoken to the police. You can also setup your phone to only accept calls from numbers that are unblocked/not private. I hope they find out who is doing this soon!
 
Can't the police go to the phone company and trace who is making these calls to you? It seems like that is the very least they
could do. I would record the calls for your record too. He is invaded your privacy and coming into your home uninvited and I would
think the updated stalking laws would apply.

I am sorry this is happening to you. We had this happen to us and we did the blocking of private calls to our phone. It was quite
a pain because a lot of people we knew complained and couldn't figure out how to unblock their number when calling us. Mostly,
our elderly relatives. However, in your case, it would be imperative to me to do it. I would also tell the jerk that everytime he
calls you, you are recording him and the police are going to trace his calls.
 
you notified the phone company. you reported to the police. get a REPORT NUMBER. call the phone company back. insist on a supervisor if need be....and give the REPORT NUMBER. they can and will be able to help you. it might take some time but it can be done.......and insist that they do it even if you have to go up their entire chain of management. i don't think you'll have to once you get a supervisor.

MoZo
 
I would have replied that the solution that occurred to me was the case getting reassigned to someone with a clue. And a sense of the liability the police department would incur if something, god forbid, did happen.

I would have reported his ass to his supervisor at the very least.
 
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