violet02
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2007
- Messages
- 2,201
So he's been working 60+ hours a week and weekends at times. He's burnt out, trying to get over a long running cold... and stressed out beyond belief. He started with a new group at work recently with a demanding schedule. It's been rough on both of us since we dont get a lot of us time and he's not able to help out as much with the wedding stuff, which I don't ask him to since I know its hard for him...
At first before the job change I was getting annoyed that he wasn't helping out more but I know he's a busy guy so I had friends help... I don't want to overstress my friends either though... things are starting to even out a bit more so he's promised that in a week he'll be able to help me finish up/assemble things etc. I think it can be so easy to forget about the guy in the wedding process sometimes. I'm so busy with dress fittings, flowers, cake, decorating... planning... girl drama (heh)... just EVERYTHING. I know he's not into the planning thing and all the little details so I try to give him a break on all that but it doesn't mean he's not part of the day too.
He's been so supportive about all the drama lately too, he's not one to placate me (as my friend said heh), instead he tells it like it is and he's been my rock through all this!
Anyways I made a comment about wedding gifts tonight.. and I said well I made you a nice gift with my own two hands (the topic came up somehow I wasn't dropping hints)... (he got the stacking ring for me as a gift btw... the one made from my mom's diamonds and hot pink sapphires from Single Stone)... I already knew what my gfit was, he didn't. I figured I'd suprise him the day of, so the I made it myself comment was to throw him off. I think I posted asking for advice about this awhile back.. (sorry I didn't go with the advice not to do it, I bought it anyways, (sheepish grin)). This was something we'd disccused months ago and then dropped the topic and haven't talked about it since.. Anyways, he was like oh okay cool... then made a joke, 'what no rolex? just kidding! I have to get a new watch soon though' (yes it was a joke!)... now I know he REALLLLLY wanted that watch. So I said well I can give you your gift now if you like and he said yes he wanted it now. So I gave it to him.
Boy was he suprised! And touched! I said that I knew he really wanted to get this for himself but with the wedding coming up and everything else going on he couldn't justify spending that kind of money for something he wanted. Considering the ring he got me, and his monetary contribution to the wedding and my lovely stacking ring and wedding band, I told him it was the least I could do (I bought his wedding band myself). I wanted him to know I was thinking about him and I told him how grateful I was to have him in my life that I did recognize his hard work and that he was a really important part of the day and that I didn't want him to think it was all about me and what I wanted, that maybe it was time for him to get something HE really wanted too.
Suffice to say he was touched, even got a bit teary eyed. He said he was glad I gave it to him now and said that. He'd been having a hard time lately and it really lifted his spirits to know I did recognize his contributions and that I did make sure he felt like it was special day too. Anwyays I'm really happy it worked out... he seems like a new man now! And now HE's all excited again about the wedding! haha... So i'm not saying expensive gifts are the way to go but I think taking the time to let your FI know you are thankful for them and that you are thinking of them through all the craziness of wedding planning and you are grateful for their love support and help goes a LONG way... its so easy to get wrapped up in yourself and the details... that's for sure. It's also nice to get him something very nice like how he got me my ring (something I love and wanted as well), and I like that knowing it's something I got for him with my own funds. (we're not doing primary joint accounts even after marriage, not to get off on a tangent).
So introducing my FI's new Rolex Explorer II watch! (he won't be presented with it officially until the wedding day) - special thanks to Ari at SS for hooking me up! Love that guy!:
At first before the job change I was getting annoyed that he wasn't helping out more but I know he's a busy guy so I had friends help... I don't want to overstress my friends either though... things are starting to even out a bit more so he's promised that in a week he'll be able to help me finish up/assemble things etc. I think it can be so easy to forget about the guy in the wedding process sometimes. I'm so busy with dress fittings, flowers, cake, decorating... planning... girl drama (heh)... just EVERYTHING. I know he's not into the planning thing and all the little details so I try to give him a break on all that but it doesn't mean he's not part of the day too.
He's been so supportive about all the drama lately too, he's not one to placate me (as my friend said heh), instead he tells it like it is and he's been my rock through all this!
Anyways I made a comment about wedding gifts tonight.. and I said well I made you a nice gift with my own two hands (the topic came up somehow I wasn't dropping hints)... (he got the stacking ring for me as a gift btw... the one made from my mom's diamonds and hot pink sapphires from Single Stone)... I already knew what my gfit was, he didn't. I figured I'd suprise him the day of, so the I made it myself comment was to throw him off. I think I posted asking for advice about this awhile back.. (sorry I didn't go with the advice not to do it, I bought it anyways, (sheepish grin)). This was something we'd disccused months ago and then dropped the topic and haven't talked about it since.. Anyways, he was like oh okay cool... then made a joke, 'what no rolex? just kidding! I have to get a new watch soon though' (yes it was a joke!)... now I know he REALLLLLY wanted that watch. So I said well I can give you your gift now if you like and he said yes he wanted it now. So I gave it to him.
Boy was he suprised! And touched! I said that I knew he really wanted to get this for himself but with the wedding coming up and everything else going on he couldn't justify spending that kind of money for something he wanted. Considering the ring he got me, and his monetary contribution to the wedding and my lovely stacking ring and wedding band, I told him it was the least I could do (I bought his wedding band myself). I wanted him to know I was thinking about him and I told him how grateful I was to have him in my life that I did recognize his hard work and that he was a really important part of the day and that I didn't want him to think it was all about me and what I wanted, that maybe it was time for him to get something HE really wanted too.
Suffice to say he was touched, even got a bit teary eyed. He said he was glad I gave it to him now and said that. He'd been having a hard time lately and it really lifted his spirits to know I did recognize his contributions and that I did make sure he felt like it was special day too. Anwyays I'm really happy it worked out... he seems like a new man now! And now HE's all excited again about the wedding! haha... So i'm not saying expensive gifts are the way to go but I think taking the time to let your FI know you are thankful for them and that you are thinking of them through all the craziness of wedding planning and you are grateful for their love support and help goes a LONG way... its so easy to get wrapped up in yourself and the details... that's for sure. It's also nice to get him something very nice like how he got me my ring (something I love and wanted as well), and I like that knowing it's something I got for him with my own funds. (we're not doing primary joint accounts even after marriage, not to get off on a tangent).
So introducing my FI's new Rolex Explorer II watch! (he won't be presented with it officially until the wedding day) - special thanks to Ari at SS for hooking me up! Love that guy!:
300x240.png)