Mood and disposition

[Porridge]

There was a really interesting psychologist on the radio today on the way home from work (Maureen Gaffney on The Last Word if anyone wants the podcast). I only caught bits of it but she was speaking about moods. She said that they tend to last for around two hours(!!) in adults. Two hours! I thought that sounded crazy long. She spoke about how emotions triggered moods, and how strongly we are affected by the moods of those around us. She said we were much more effective when in a good mood, and prone to self-doubt and less effectiveness when in a low mood. I definitely feel that, the smallest tasks take monumental effort when I'm not in a good mood!

She spoke briefly about how extroverted people tend to be happier, and that some people have to work harder to maintain good moods. She was saying more about dispositions to happiness but I didn't hear it (had to go to a meeting).

I know most of this is common sense, but it was still very interesting to hear it spelled out. I don't really have a point to this post, I'm kind of rambling, I just never gave it much thought before. Now that I do think about it, it is fascinating how affected we are by mood and the moods of those around us. I was struck by how little control we have over it - I had always thought of it as largely a matter of choice.

Any thoughts? How is your mood generally? Are you naturally happy or do you have to work at it? Do you find yourself noticeably affected by the moods of others?

 

[Maisie]

I'm naturally cheerful. If something annoys me I don't stay in a mood for long. My husband can hold a huff for ages. I just don't see the point in festering. Its only me that suffers, not the person who annoyed me

 

[Maisie]

Double post!

 

[Porridge]

Haha, true! Sounds like we have similar dispositions.

I should clarify, I realise illnesses affect mood. That's a whole other conversation, and obviously when I said I thought mood was largely down to choice I did NOT mean that one can just choose to overcome bad moods caused by illness.

 

[tyty333]

I'm a happy introvert . My kids can turn my mood quickly though .

 

[Porridge]

I'm a happy introvert

Yeah that one struck me. I only heard the start of that part, but I think her reasoning was that extroverts tend to feel better sharing problems and that that lifts their moods? Wasn't the soundest reasoning I'd heard if I'm honest... maybe she was generalising or it was part of a longer reasoning process that I didn't hear. I definitely know some unstable and unhappy extroverts, and plenty of happy introverts. I must go back and listen to the podcast.

 

[radiantquest]

I am usually in a good mood and giggly, but when I get angry it feels like it lasts longer than 2 hours.

I might have to look into that because I dont know about you guys but if something angers me I am suddenly reminded about all the other things that anger me too.

 

[kenny]

I think my "mood" is usually neutral.
Not happy or sad.

I certainly have times when I feel happy or sad based on what's going on, but my default "mood" could be best describes as nothing.
I just am.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

I'm all over the place, but does this mean anything or is this "normal" if moods tend to last around two hours?

One person I know who is bubbily and chipper told me I'm moody. She's also told me who else she thinks is moody. The thing though is she smiles all the time and "pumps" people up with her charm, but then when they're out of the room, cuts them down, so I see a chipper outside that is filled with a dark inside! Yikes. People are complex creatures!

 

[Porridge]

I might have to look into that because I dont know about you guys but if something angers me I am suddenly reminded about all the other things that anger me too.

She said that this was a characteristic of moods and that it works in reverse - when we are in a good mood we're opened up to all our positive emotional memories and that this spurs us on even more!

MC - she sounds like a nasty piece of work. I can't stand fakeness like that.

 

[mary poppins]

The thing though is she smiles all the time and "pumps" people up with her charm, but then when they're out of the room, cuts them down, so I see a chipper outside that is filled with a dark inside! Yikes. People are complex creatures!

A wolf in sheep's clothing. Yuck!

 

[monarch64]

I'm an extrovert. If I spend too much time alone I tend to go into a funk. I love my alone time, though!

 

[sonnyjane]

I'm an extrovert. If I spend too much time alone I tend to go into a funk. I love my alone time, though!

That's me too. I interact with people for a living, I live for my weekly happy hour dates with friends, and I'm always chatting up strangers in lines. That said, there are times when I turn down invites so that I can sit at home in pajamas or take a bubble bath.

 

[princesss]

I'm an extrovert. If I spend too much time alone I tend to go into a funk. I love my alone time, though!

I'm like that, too, Monnie. Sitting at home alone ends up depressing me and I need more time to unwind from doing that than just about anything else. I generally only need time to myself (really, truly need time ALONE) every few months.

 

[allycat0303]

Porridge,

Great topic. In a similar topic (although not quite the same). I once read that people have a pre-set baseline of happiness and tended to gravitate toward that no matter what.

I would say that I "Fake happy a lot." At work with the patients, I'm always portraying a happy, calm exterior. While I do love my job, I force myself to smile and be positive because I think it's depressing enough to be sick without having a resident that is angry, moody and short tempered. It takes a lot of my energy, and I'm sometimes pretty tired at the end of the day. On the inside, I'm a dark person. I don't necessarily brood, but my thoughts are often revolve around life and death, and I think almost incessantly about what my purpose in life is. When I'm alone, and free to be myself, I'd say I'm quite close to *melancholy*. I think people would freak out if they knew how often I thought about death and dying, so I keep it hidden.

 

[Haven]

I'm in a good mood most of the time. I think this is just my natural disposition. My mother tells stories of walking into my babyhood bedroom to find me singing nonsense songs to myself, just as happy as could be. Apparently, I went on to spend a lot of time entertaining myself as a child--collecting and then painting rocks for hours (the ROCK obsession started early!), making up songs and stories on my own, etc.

So, I'm a happy introvert, definitely.

After thinking about it, I've realized that when I get upset the length of time that I hold onto the anger really does depend on my surroundings. If I'm on my own, I'll usually retreat into a book or movie that I love, and my mood will change very quickly. If I'm with DH, it's impossible for me to stay upset for very long. Even if I'm mad AT HIM, we have this habit of cracking up with laughter pretty quickly after the anger surfaces. But if I'm stuck at work or in some public place, surrounded by a lot of people, I have a much more difficult time letting things go right away. Very interesting, I never realized that before.