Wedding mini vent

[janinegirly]

so for those of you who''ve been following my "planning" story, you know that FI''s family has been minimally involved. FI says they''re giving us our space, I personally think they''re not too interested.
i''ve done the bulk (ie 99%) of the planning, and it''s nearly driven me insane, but now i''m 3 days away and just want to cruise, relax and enjoy. FI has not had much involvement either, but I''ve come to terms with that. Still, I ran everything by him, confirmed he was ok, asked if his parents would be ok with decisions I made---Ii always was given the green light--whether it was a true green light, or just done out of laziness who knows, but I can''t be asked to read people''s minds.

SO. today, 3 days from the wedding when everythings done, FI tells me his mom wants to move around her tables and is there time. Uh....NO. Placecards are done, table assignements given to the reception. I''m not moving boulders in order to make things happen OR doing something chessy like pull placecards out and have people move around. So I said, NOPE, sorry, too late. (As it stands FI''s brother already had me running around to get him a last minute room at our group rate despite me remnding him and asking FI to remind him literally for the past 6 mo''s).

Anyway, it felt good to say "no" for once!
I know this is kind of a pointless post, but had to get it out!

 

[sumbride]

Believe me, I understand!!!

Good for you for holding your ground! Stay there and keep saying "NO" to any other requests that may come your way. It''s not your problem that they are only interested now! Hang in there girl, you''re almost done!!!

 

[Harleigh]

I totally feel your pain, Janine, and good for you for saying NO!!!

Nobody is doing anything for our wedding, either...there has been NO interest shown, whatsoever, so if anyone in our families doesn''t like my choices, oh well...no one but us is paying for it, so tough!

Hang in there and try to enjoy the next 3 days the best you can!

 

[anchor31]

Good for you for saying no!

And ditto on nobody helping (except FI) so if they''re not happy they can either suck it up or not show...

 

[zoebartlett]

Good for you!! If it makes you feel any better, know you''re in good company -- my FI''s family isn''t helping to plan the wedding at all (although they are contributing some $). They (his parents) aren''t coming to the rehearsal dinner simply because....I don''t get why, actually. So you''re not alone.

 

[Independent Gal]

And another ditto! In FI''s parents'' culture, the groom''s parents do zilch-o. In fact, when I asked him to ask his mom if there was anything important to her we should include, or if she wanted to be help plan or contribute in any way, she was kind of puzzled. To her it looked sort of like this: say your friend is throwing a dinner party and invites you, and then calls you and asks you to make a seating plan. For her, the bride''s parents are the hosts, and the groom''s are just guests. No rehearsal dinner. No bride''s bouquet. Zilch. And of course no financial contribution either.

You did the right thing sticking to your guns. It''s just rude to suddenly pipe up three days before and ask for changes.

 

[iheartscience]

Good work on saying NO! I bet that felt really good. If it was me I would be smiling so big they would be able to hear it over the phone when I said NOPE!

 

[sap483]

Add me to the list- FI''s parents can''t even be bothered to provide me with their guest list, even though I''ve been asking since March let alone contributing financially! Good for you for saying no. I''m sure it felt really good!

 

[akw94]

Janine,
Just popping in to wish you a wonderful wedding day! I''m sure everything will turn out beautifully. I''m happy for you!!

Congrats in advance!