if wife and i are getting a divorce...

[Dancing Fire]

should i expect her to return the jewerly to me. what are the basic American rules?...

 

[Enerchi]

WHAT??? DF is this happening?? I hope not...

But if you have been married and gifted jewels to her, they are hers. I'd hope if they were family heirlooms there would be an agreement to pass to children not keep herself


But please tell us all is ok...

 

[madelise]

WHAT??? DF is this happening?? I hope not...

But if you have been married and gifted jewels to her, they are hers. I'd hope if they were family heirlooms there would be an agreement to pass to children not keep herself


But please tell us all is ok...

I think DF and the MrsDF are fine ; this conversation got sparked due to the now sale of PS'ers diamond.

----
DF, I agree with Enerchi. A gift is a gift. If a man proposes, and presents his fiancé with a diamond ring and HE breaks off the engagement, she keeps the ring. If SHE breaks off the engagement, it's customary she returns the ring. If they divorce, she keeps her gifts, unless they are family heirlooms that should stay within the family.

I remember watching crappy daytime trash television and those court cases whenever I was sick from attending HS. I remember the judge always saying an engagement ring is a gift, thus regardless of situation, it belongs to the gal. However, etiquette says that if she breaks it off, he gets to have it back. And if he cheats, she goes and takes his whole bank account with her.

 

[Missy]

Definitely not. In fact you must give all you own to your DW. All you watches for sure.

 

[soocool]

I always wondered if jewelry constituted community property? Some of my friends who divorced got rid of the jewelry and hence the memories. Only one friend took her diamond ER and put a sapphire halo around it and wore it on her right hand.

 

[soocool]

Definitely not. In fact you must give all you own to your DW. All you watches for sure.

I like this!

 

[chrono]

DF must be feeling bored again. Typically, whatever you gift to her is hers. As for the watches.....

 

[AprilBaby]

She keeps the goods so better stay married!

 

[ame]

AFAIK, as long as it isn't spelled out in the prenup, whatever you gift to her prior and during the marriage is hers.

 

[AGBF]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

Deb/AGBF

 

[Enerchi]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

Deb/AGBF

You rock, Deb!!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

 

[Alexiszoe]

Yes, she gets to keep it if it's a gift from you to her.

However, if it is a family heirloom, it either gets passed on to the children, or if there are no kids, then it should be returned.

 

[kenny]

Would not all property in a marriage fall under community property laws of that state to be divvied up in a divorce?

If so then sure, she may keep the $20,000 diamond, but that means he gets the $20,000 piano.

Perhaps you are not asking what's legal, but rather what's nice, fair, customary, proper or what Ms. Manners decrees.
If so all bets are off since people vary.

 

[madelise]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

Deb/AGBF

You rock, Deb!!

ai laik.

 

[Maisie]

Would you expect every gift you ever gave her to be returned to you? Would you return everything she ever bought you?

 

[minousbijoux]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

Deb/AGBF

Wow, so much insight, wisdom and rules to live by all rolled into one - well done, Deb!

 

[AGBF]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

Wow, so much insight, wisdom and rules to live by all rolled into one - well done, Deb!

Well...not only did I watch, "Life with Father", but I lived it during my 35 year marriage. Husbands often have to have the last word...even if it makes all the maids cry and quit. Not that we had maids.

Deb

 

[Dancing Fire]

WHAT??? DF is this happening?? I hope not...

But if you have been married and gifted jewels to her, they are hers. I'd hope if they were family heirlooms there would be an agreement to pass to children not keep herself


But please tell us all is ok...

nahhh...she ain't stupid...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Would you expect every gift you ever gave her to be returned to you? Would you return everything she ever bought you?

the answer is NOTHING

 

[Dancing Fire]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

Deb/AGBF

very funny Mother Teresa...

 

[Rhea]

The person that was given the gift would typical keep it. It was a gift.

I had a boyfriend once who expected his gifts back because he'd given me jewellery. I asked for the items I'd given him back in return. That was different according to him. The jewellery goes back to it's giver while the stereo, watch, and laptop of the same value stay with the received. Interesting logic there.

 

[AGBF]

what are the basic American rules?...

That you are allowed to come here and blab as much as you want as long as know who that she is really in charge. Be as much of a blowhard in public as you want as long as you toe the line for Mrs DF quietly at home.

very funny Mother Teresa...

I've been polishing my halo, DF.

Deb

 

[Lew Lew]

WHAT??? DF is this happening?? I hope not...

But if you have been married and gifted jewels to her, they are hers. I'd hope if they were family heirlooms there would be an agreement to pass to children not keep herself


But please tell us all is ok...

I think DF and the MrsDF are fine ; this conversation got sparked due to the now sale of PS'ers diamond.

----
DF, I agree with Enerchi. A gift is a gift. If a man proposes, and presents his fiancé with a diamond ring and HE breaks off the engagement, she keeps the ring. If SHE breaks off the engagement, it's customary she returns the ring. If they divorce, she keeps her gifts, unless they are family heirlooms that should stay within the family.

I remember watching crappy daytime trash television and those court cases whenever I was sick from attending HS. I remember the judge always saying an engagement ring is a gift, thus regardless of situation, it belongs to the gal. However, etiquette says that if she breaks it off, he gets to have it back. And if he cheats, she goes and takes his whole bank account with her.

The general rule is that a completed gift (a gift that has been delivered to the recipient) does not have to be returned to the gift-giver. However, with respect to engagement rings and other gifts made in contemplation of marriage, the rules are different. I don't know about other states, but in NY the man may require his fiancee to give back the engagement ring if the marriage does not take place, regardless of fault (i.e., it doesn't matter who broke off the engagement). The same law applies not only to engagement rings, but any property given "in contemplation of marriage," and not only to the engaged couple giving gifts to each other, but to third parties who gave a gift to the couple in contemplation of marriage. So for example, if a woman gave a watch to her fiancee as an engagement gift, and then they never got married, or if the bride's parents gave the couple a house as a wedding gift, and then the couple never got married, the gift-giver could get the property back, regardless of who broke off the engagement.

 

[JuneRose]

The person that was given the gift would typical keep it. It was a gift.

I had a boyfriend once who expected his gifts back because he'd given me jewellery. I asked for the items I'd given him back in return. That was different according to him. The jewellery goes back to it's giver while the stereo, watch, and laptop of the same value stay with the received. Interesting logic there.

Quite...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Yes, she gets to keep it if it's a gift from you to her.

However, if it is a family heirloom, it either gets passed on to the children, or if there are no kids, then it should be returned.

then the next jewelry piece i'll be sure to say..." i let you BORROW it for now"...

 

[MyDiamondSparkles]

If you make more money than she does, she keeps the jewels.

If she makes more money than you do, she still keeps the jewels.

If you ever want to see the jewels again, stay married. HA! And just think, with the money you save from not going thru a divorce you can buy more jewels.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

If you make more money than she does, she keeps the jewels.

If she makes more money than you do, she still keeps the jewels.

If you ever want to see the jewels again, stay married. HA! And just think, with the money you save from not going thru a divorce you can buy more jewels.

Perfect!

 

[Clairitek]

In DF's state gifts are not considered within the realm of common property so she would not be required to return the jewelry.