How often do you get lectured?

[jewelz617]

Whether it be from your parents, your spouse, your boss or even online. I feel like I''m constantly being lectured about something.

My husband gives me lectures about forgetting to put dryer sheets in his laundry. My mother lectures me about getting a bigger place, a better car, a master''s degree. When does it end???? DOES it ever end?

 

[Squirrly]

don''t know, i tuned it out long ago

 

[radiantquest]

Don''t take this the wrong way, but stand up for yourself. The next time your husband lectures you about a dryer sheet tell him that he can do it himself if he doesnt like the way you do it and as far as your parents are concerned, remind them that you are an adult and when you want another car you will get one.

You dont have to be rude about it just let them know that you are not a child that needs lectured. Unless you are doing something that is dangerous to you or someone else they have no reason to lecture you.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Agreed, if you don''t say something it will keep draggin your mood down
I learned this the hard way

 

[jewelz617]

I swear, it started when I was pregnant and just never stopped. Before I'd kind of brush it off, but now I notice it more. The worst is when people I don't even know lecture me or criticize me. I just want to say "You know NOTHING about me, back off!"

Ok, rant over.

 

[kama_s]

''I''m sorry, but when I need advice I''ll be sure to come to you. for now, I''m good, thanks''

You''ve got to put an end to it! I hate anyone lecturing me, even when I was a kid. It just seems so...condescending, ya know? I don''t think I''ve been lectured since I turned 18, but it''s probably because my parents long gave up on me to do anything ''their'' way. Ha.

 

[somethingshiny]

Never. DH and I don''t lecture each other and our parents have long since known that we are the bosses of ourselves. When I was working for Dr''s I''d get lectured once in a while and it was unacceptable so I told them to not speak to me that way. You don''t speak to an adult in a lecturing manner.

I don''t think I''ve ever been "lectured" online. Some one may disagree with me or even think I''m an awful person but I''ve never felt lectured.

I hope you''re able to put an end to the lecturing!

 

[April20]

Couldn''t tell you the last time. I don''t and won''t put up with lecturing from anyone unless it''s something that''s truly an issue.

 

[iheartscience]

Ha, never! I don''t take kindly to being lectured since I''m an adult and all. Now that I think about it, I didn''t take kindly to being lectured when I was a kid, either!

If your husband is worried about his laundry, he can do it himself. And your house, car, etc. isn''t your mother''s business-tell her that!

 

[Kaleigh]

OMG, If my husband ever tried to lecture me about Laundry??? He''d be on his own doing it in a nano second... And add to that cooking as well.

Your Mom?? You need to set some boundaries with her.. Tell her she''s being inappropriate. It''s your life, and you are doing just fine thank you very much.

You have control over how people treat you. If you lay down and let people run over you, I gotta say you have to take ownership of that.

Time for some serious changes... Be firm, be straight forward. Tell it like it is... It''s empowering to say the least. Try it!!

 

[princesss]

Haven''t been lectured in years. At this point, I''m an adult, and lectures are not welcomed. I''m open to conversations and learning new ways to do things, but presentation matters.

 

[Rachel9]

It ends now if you want it to end. Please don't take me wrong, act now before the kids come along.....this is not acceptable, imagine DH talking to you that way in front of your kids or your in public..... do something about it today ie have him do his own loundry!

 

[jewelz617]

Date: 2/6/2010 9:12:05 PM
Author: Rachel9


It ends now if you want it to end. Please don''t take me wrong, act now before the kids come along.....this is not acceptable, imagine DH talking to you that way in front of your kids or your in public..... do something about it today, have him do his own loundry!

We have a daughter... My husband isn''t some awful guy or anything, but once he gets going about the laundry, it''s a 30 minute lecture about static cling.

Generally he''s very relaxed, but something about those dryer sheets makes him crazy.

 

[princesss]

Date: 2/6/2010 9:16:05 PM
Author: PinkAsscher678

Date: 2/6/2010 9:12:05 PM

Author: Rachel9



It ends now if you want it to end. Please don''t take me wrong, act now before the kids come along.....this is not acceptable, imagine DH talking to you that way in front of your kids or your in public..... do something about it today, have him do his own loundry!

We have a daughter... My husband isn''t some awful guy or anything, but once he gets going about the laundry, it''s a 30 minute lecture about static cling.


Generally he''s very relaxed, but something about those dryer sheets makes him crazy.

Grab one of those bounce things that you stick in the dryer so you don''t have to worry about it. I always laugh at the commercial, but it could help eliminate some of the problem.

I''d still tell him (in no uncertain terms) that he can have a preference, but he needs to find a better way to express it.

 

[jewelz617]

Good call on the Bounce Bar. Hopefully I won''t get lectured if I forget to change it hahaha!

 

[Rachel9]

Hmmm, DD prob heard it already, stop the training, you don't want DD to think it's OK to be lectured by a man over static

DH is quite educated, talented and loving but short wired. About 12 years ago he raised his voice at me for not ironing a shirt the 'right' way...I knew he was stressed and late & accepted his apology, THAT was the end of shirt ironing for me.

 

[packrat]

Pink, next time, snap your heels together, puff your chest out, hand up in salute and yell "SIR YES SIR!" I used to do that to my dad when he''d lecture me about how I wasn''t doing "whatever" properly..like cutting asparagus the right way or whatever Jim felt was not to his specifications.

Another one we used was "You''re not the boss of me" And say it like you''re 5. I love it..scrunch your eyes all up and look irritated and pretend you''re a little kid telling that to another little kid. hahaha works nicely. Or, it did on my dad anyway. "Hey, yeah, yer not the boss of me JIM!"

At first, dad was TICKED OFF when I''d do it and finally he yelled "I''m your Father, don''t speak to me like that!" And I said, well, I''m your daughter and I''m an adult and if you''re going to talk to me like I''m 5, I''m going to sass you back like I''m 5.

 

[Imdanny]

A lot on line and it's boring. After twelve years on the internet or however long it's been, I try my best to ignore it. I'm pretty much to the stage that- you want to run your mouth at me- go for it.

Responding in kind to people like that just makes them worse and reporting posts isn't my idea of fun.

IRL, not so much. Honestly, someone who is going to do that to me IRL had better have a very good reason.

It's a good question. Thanks for asking it.

 

[yssie]

Haha my parents, for sure

The worst is when I know they have a point!

 

[Burberrygirl]

Almost never, my parents are the only people in my life who would ever lecture me, but I can''t really remember the last time they were overly critical or lectured me... I don''t think I''d deal with it well if they did!

 

[Dreamer_D]

I like to be the one doing the lecturing

But I try to keep it limited to my work.

 

[honey22]

Certainly wouldn''t take DH lecturing me about the laundry. He copped an earfull today for rearranging my laundry shelves. He know''s it''s my room, he should keep out

But in all seriousness, stand up for yourself and don''t allow others to walk over you. When you do, they will quickly realise you are not one to be lectured.

 

[that_someone_special]

How often? Probably when I deserve it.

 

[Mrs Mitchell]

3- 5 x per day - from the lecturers at law school. It would not be well tolerated from anyone else.
Your husband maybe needs to do his own laundry, no? Some parents lecture adult children all their lives. You can either tell them it needs to stop or tune it out, depending on how much it bothers you.

 

[vc10um]

Date: 2/7/2010 4:27:25 AM
Author: swedish bean
How often? Probably when I deserve it.

Ditto, SB. Ditto.

 

[elrohwen]

I used to be lectured by my boss constantly and typically for things I didn''t do (often for things *he* did). I''m so glad to be away from that job because it was horrible.

Nobody else ever lectures me. DH and my mom try occasionally, but I don''t let them get away with it

 

[y2kitty]

My car mechanic lectures me. Told me I needed to learn how to change my windshield wipers myself, since it is cheaper to do it yourself. Also told me he wanted me to enroll in a car care class so I could change my own oil. I guess he doesn''t like my money?

 

[somethingshiny]

Lol at the "You''re not the boss of me!" The other one we say is "Don''t tell me how to live my life!" in an equally 5 yr old manner. I guess lectures still try to start occasionally, but we diffuse them quickly.

 

[Porridge]

College. But it was their job

If somebody tried to lecture me now it would not end well for them. I'm an adult, a competent one. That means discussions, not lectures.
Stand up for yourself PA! Everybody *thinks* they know best, and are only delighted to get the opportunity to spout on about it. You know best for you. Make sure that the next time someone tries to lecture you, they get that message.

 

[Haven]

Never.