Wedding How much would you tip? or would you?

[MsSassy]

So i dont plan on tipping any of my vendors (22% gratuity is already added to the final bill of the country club), the DJ is charging 1300 and i dont think i should tip him for doing a job that im already paying 1300 for him to do.

My problem is that my MUA/Stylist is costing me $550 bucks for wedding day and $200 bucks for the trial. I''m also paying another MUS/Stylist to come and do my mom''s and my fiance''s moms hair and makeup ($340 total) and then 2 more stylist to come and do all my BM''s hair (another $420). that means total i''m paying $1510 for Hair and Makeup...if i tip my normal 20-25% that would be an additional $300-$400 bucks! whats the standard for tipping...i guess i feel like im already paying so much for these people but its not fair that im expected to give them more money on top of that...

what do you guys think?

 

[oobiecoo]

Wow!!! Honestly, if I were already spending so much on hair and makeup, I''d probably just give each stylist $50-$100 maybe??? Not sure if that is right though.

 

[meresal]

IMHO, you should give each stylist their 20%, and this is based on the fact that these people are going to be servicing you for a couple of hours, yes? There is a reason that their prices are the way they are, they''re good... and if you like what they do, then they deserve it, again just my opinion.

Tips-
1st stylist: $150
2nd stylist: $78
3rd stylist: $84

It''s what you would give them on any other day if you needed their services, no? Say one of them ususally does updo''s/cuts/whatever on Saturday''s and is charging you what she would normally make. Each of those people would be tipping her, so I think that when you take on her price, then you also need to take on the tips she would be loosing as well.

I tend to agree with the DJ thing, haven''t picked mine yet, but it will be up to my parents wether they feel the need to tip whoever it is. I will not be tipping any servers or bartenders at my reception either.

Best of Luck!

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

My approach on tipping:

If the person doing your makeup and hair is working for herself, then you do not need to tip her. However, if you hired her through a service or salon, then you should probably tip her because a lot of that money is going to the employer. Tipping is for employees such as stylists working at a salon or waiters at a restaurant, not for the owner of a business. Evaluate each stylist separately, and decide if they work for themselves and if they deserve a tip based on their work.

 

[meresal]

Date: 10/3/2008 10:14:27 AM
Author: Guilty Pleasure
My approach on tipping:

If the person doing your makeup and hair is working for herself, then you do not need to tip her. However, if you hired her through a service or salon, then you should probably tip her because a lot of that money is going to the employer. Tipping is for employees such as stylists working at a salon or waiters at a restaurant, not for the owner of a business. Evaluate each stylist separately, and decide if they work for themselves and if they deserve a tip based on their work.

GP: Can you explain this. I''m not sure I follow. What would be the difference? Is she not still providing you a service, and has overhead charges just as any other company (replacing make-up, brushes, blowdriers, flat irons, gas, mileage, etc)?

 

[Cleopatra]

Date: 10/3/2008 10:52:07 AM
Author: meresal

Date: 10/3/2008 10:14:27 AM
Author: Guilty Pleasure
My approach on tipping:

If the person doing your makeup and hair is working for herself, then you do not need to tip her. However, if you hired her through a service or salon, then you should probably tip her because a lot of that money is going to the employer. Tipping is for employees such as stylists working at a salon or waiters at a restaurant, not for the owner of a business. Evaluate each stylist separately, and decide if they work for themselves and if they deserve a tip based on their work.

GP: Can you explain this. I''m not sure I follow. What would be the difference? Is she not still providing you a service, and has overhead charges just as any other company (replacing make-up, brushes, blowdriers, flat irons, gas, mileage, etc)?

Meresal: I understand what GP is saying. My makeup artist was an independent artist - didn''t work for a salon or anything, just simply did makeup on the side as an extra job - she''s a great artist and I was thrilled with her work. She charged a flat fee to do our makeup (which was pretty high already) - 100% of that goes to her - nothing is split up between the business, owners and other employees. It''s almost like a photographer - she named her price and that''s what I paid - I felt no need to tip her as she didn''t lose any other business that day as she is on a client-by-client basis.

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Meresal, at a salon, the business determines the price and pays their employees a certain percentage for each appointment. So if your hair salon charges 60 dollars for a haircut, your stylist does not receive 60 dollars. She also has no say in the price or how much she makes or what percentage of the 60 dollars goes toward overhead versus paying employees or keeping in the pockets of the business owner. It is expected that her tip will raise her income, just like a waiter lives off his tips much moreso than his wage. A person who owns their own salon "does the books." They know the overhead, they set the price, and they pay themselves as both the employee and the employer. They have complete control over the price and have already taken into account the cost of their supplies, etc. They don''t need the extra tip... just like you might tip the guy takes your groceries out, but you''re not going to send Kroger an extra dollar because you like the produce and you want to help them pay for the water sprayer machine. (silly analogy, I know!)


That''s just my personal rule, and even I don''t always follow it. I used to have my hair done by a firend''s mom who owned her own place. I always tipped her because she was the best haircut I had ever had! I had to move away though and find someone new

Their are differing opinions o nthe subject, and "not tipping the owner" is an old rule I''m sure, probably evolving into something else. I just know that personally in the situation above, I would not tip the mua 20% on top of what I already paid if she owned her own business.

 

[doodle]

Personally, I tip based solely on how good (or bad) the person did at providing the service for which I hired them. I figured that their prices were set before I came along, and I chose to use them, so I shouldn''t hold their standard rate against them when I opted to go along with it in the first place. I generally consider the tip as part of the overall price, and if I can''t afford to both pay for the service and the tip, then I can''t afford that vendor. I think my feelings on this are likely very strong because I''m friends with so many people in various service-based jobs, and I know how hard it is when a good bit of your income is tip-based, but a lot of people consider tips optional even if they were given exceptional service. However, I also think people tend to over-tip when they''re unsure of what the standard tipping for a service would be--case in point, your DJ. Sliding him a $20 is a nice gesture if he did a really good job, and believe me, your DJ is possibly the LAST person you want to offend on your wedding day--unless hearing "Kung Fu Fighting" your whole reception sounds like a good time.

As far as people from the country club go, you''re not expected to tip them anyway if a gratuity is included (and at that, your gratuity''s pretty high!). I''d tip the stylists, and if you really can''t afford to do so, I''d look for a cheaper stylist or let your BMs do their own hair or something. Good luck with figuring everything out!

...okay, I can''t resist anymore--I have to ask! Do you live in either CA or NY? I can''t imagine anywhere else that''d charge that much for hair and makeup!!!! ***I''m in GA--I only paid $30 for my hair trial, so I have a hard time comprehending having to spend that much!

 

[meresal]

Date: 10/3/2008 2:38:54 PM
Author: doodle
Personally, I tip based solely on how good (or bad) the person did at providing the service for which I hired them. I figured that their prices were set before I came along, and I chose to use them, so I shouldn't hold their standard rate against them when I opted to go along with it in the first place. I generally consider the tip as part of the overall price, and if I can't afford to both pay for the service and the tip, then I can't afford that vendor. I think my feelings on this are likely very strong because I'm friends with so many people in various service-based jobs, and I know how hard it is when a good bit of your income is tip-based, but a lot of people consider tips optional even if they were given exceptional service. However, I also think people tend to over-tip when they're unsure of what the standard tipping for a service would be--case in point, your DJ. Sliding him a $20 is a nice gesture if he did a really good job, and believe me, your DJ is possibly the LAST person you want to offend on your wedding day--unless hearing 'Kung Fu Fighting' your whole reception sounds like a good time.

As far as people from the country club go, you're not expected to tip them anyway if a gratuity is included (and at that, your gratuity's pretty high!). I'd tip the stylists, and if you really can't afford to do so, I'd look for a cheaper stylist or let your BMs do their own hair or something. Good luck with figuring everything out!

...okay, I can't resist anymore--I have to ask! Do you live in either CA or NY? I can't imagine anywhere else that'd charge that much for hair and makeup!!!! ***I'm in GA--I only paid $30 for my hair trial, so I have a hard time comprehending having to spend that much!

I was wondering the same thing?! Is the $200 a down payment towards you wedding day charge? Or is the stylist going to be there for the entirety of your wedding day for make-up? If it's really $200 for a trail, which I assume is probably close to what they charge for a regular up-do, I imagine you are using a very well known stylist, no?

I put everyone that is serving me in the same category. If we didn't already have a 20% grat on all food and beverage, then we would tip everyone the 15-20% they are due. Even if you own a business, I think they are still owed a nice gesture of my gratitude. Like I said earlier(and agree with doodle), there is a reason that their price is high, and it's probably beacuse they are very good at what they do. I wouldn't think twice about tipping, no matter the circumstance... that is unless they did something I had stated I didn't want and chose to ignore me. Just my opinion though.

 

[MsSassy]

all the MUA/Stylists work on their own. They all keep 100% of what they make. I live in the Bay area and i really think that they stylists/MUA charge an arm and a leg because thats the going rate. I just dont think its very fair that just because its a wedding they charge a markup, especially when they''re technically suppose to be doing about the same amount of work. And it''s not like i cant afford to tip them, its whether i really think i should considering i know they''re already marking up the price...i can understand tipping for service with the person who is receiving the tip counts on it as their primary income, but i think it becomes a little sticky when its the payment of the service that is the primary income. how is a stylist that costs 750 bucks different than a DJ that charges 750? they both provide a service based upon an agreed price and you expect both of them to do a good job thats why you''re willing to pay the exorbant price. Why do you tip a person when they are doing what you''re paying them for?

maybe its different because my FI and I are paying for everything ourselves...im sure if our parents were helping us tipping out an additional $500 wouldnt be a problem.

 

[doodle]

Date: 10/3/2008 2:55:48 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 10/3/2008 2:38:54 PM

...okay, I can''t resist anymore--I have to ask! Do you live in either CA or NY? I can''t imagine anywhere else that''d charge that much for hair and makeup!!!! ***I''m in GA--I only paid $30 for my hair trial, so I have a hard time comprehending having to spend that much!

I was wondering the same thing?! Is the $200 a down payment towards you wedding day charge? Or is the stylist going to be there for the entirety of your wedding day for make-up? If it''s really $200 for a trail, I imagine you are using a very well known stylist, no?

geez, i hope she is, meresal! i personally wouldn''t pay FREDERIC FEKKAI $200 just for a trial run, but i''m out of touch with standard rates in the huge cities!

 

[meresal]

Sassy: Why don''t you ask each of the BM''s to contribute to the tip based on what they feel is right. One of my friends did this and we were more than happy to oblige.

 

[MsSassy]

Date: 10/3/2008 3:10:15 PM
Author: meresal
Sassy: Why don''t you ask each of the BM''s to contribute to the tip based on what they feel is right. One of my friends did this and we were more than happy to oblige.

cause that just isnt me. I''m not asking my bridesmaids pay for anything that i''m asking for. if they want something additional than they can pay for it, but hair and all the other stuff I will pay for, they''re my guests and i dont feel like they should feel obligated to pay for anything, hence asking them to pay is not even an option

 

[meresal]

What if you did $100 to your stylist, a $50 to the stylist in charge of Mom and FMIL, and $20 or $30 to each of the girls doing the BM's.

It comes in at just around $200, which is about $100 less than doing a full 20% for each.

 

[Gypsy]

I'm in the Bay Area and I paid a heart stopping amount of $$ for my makeup artist too (including a 200 trial), which I have to say I do not regret one bit (but that's another conversation). Maria at PMA (my MUA) went above and beyond, so while I originially do NOT intend to tip at all, and she did not expect me to either I did tip her in the end. She ended up doing my mom's makeup for free, and doing my aunt's false lashes for her, as well as a whole host of other things. But i was already (including the trail) paying 1000 for her services... so I tipped 100 in cash. It's not 20%, it was a gesture of my appreciation for her and an acknowledgment of everything she did for us. When I get my pro-pics I'm going to send her one, with a nice handwritten thank you card, and a small bottle of perfume (she collects). Again, an acknowledgement. She works for herself, and was already being paid her full fee, and it was a good amount. I would not have tipped her if she hadn't gone above and beyond. Now, if she had assistants doing my mom, or my BM, I would have tipped the assistants as they would not be working for themselves, but for her. I would have tipped 20% for the assitants.

My caterer BTW told me specifically that they do not allow an additional gratiuty. 18% was in the bill, that's all they would accept. I appreciated that. I did not tip my florist, my photographers, or my DJ, and my DOC refused a tip as well. They will all be getting thank you cards and little personalized tokens of appreciation as well.

 

[gtn]

Date: 10/3/2008 6:34:39 PM
Author: Gypsy
I''m in the Bay Area and I paid a heart stopping amount of $$ for my makeup artist too (including a 200 trial), which I have to say I do not regret one bit (but that''s another conversation). Maria at PMA (my MUA) went above and beyond, so while I originially do NOT intend to tip at all, and she did not expect me to either I did tip her in the end. She ended up doing my mom''s makeup for free, and doing my aunt''s false lashes for her, as well as a whole host of other things. But i was already (including the trail) paying 1000 for her services... so I tipped 100 in cash. It''s not 20%, it was a gesture of my appreciation for her and an acknowledgment of everything she did for us. When I get my pro-pics I''m going to send her one, with a nice handwritten thank you card, and a small bottle of perfume (she collects). Again, an acknowledgement. She works for herself, and was already being paid her full fee, and it was a good amount. I would not have tipped her if she hadn''t gone above and beyond. Now, if she had assistants doing my mom, or my BM, I would have tipped the assistants as they would not be working for themselves, but for her. I would have tipped 20% for the assitants.


My caterer BTW told me specifically that they do not allow an additional gratiuty. 18% was in the bill, that''s all they would accept. I appreciated that. I did not tip my florist, my photographers, or my DJ, and my DOC refused a tip as well. They will all be getting thank you cards and little personalized tokens of appreciation as well.

Slight threadjack, my friend used Maria at PMA, and if you could afford her, she is awesome. She really does more than is asked of her. If I could afford her, I would have hired her. She really is worth every penny

OK, end of threadjack.

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Date: 10/3/2008 6:34:39 PM
Author: Gypsy
I''m in the Bay Area and I paid a heart stopping amount of $$ for my makeup artist too (including a 200 trial), which I have to say I do not regret one bit (but that''s another conversation). Maria at PMA (my MUA) went above and beyond, so while I originially do NOT intend to tip at all, and she did not expect me to either I did tip her in the end. She ended up doing my mom''s makeup for free, and doing my aunt''s false lashes for her, as well as a whole host of other things. But i was already (including the trail) paying 1000 for her services... so I tipped 100 in cash. It''s not 20%, it was a gesture of my appreciation for her and an acknowledgment of everything she did for us. When I get my pro-pics I''m going to send her one, with a nice handwritten thank you card, and a small bottle of perfume (she collects). Again, an acknowledgement. She works for herself, and was already being paid her full fee, and it was a good amount. I would not have tipped her if she hadn''t gone above and beyond. Now, if she had assistants doing my mom, or my BM, I would have tipped the assistants as they would not be working for themselves, but for her. I would have tipped 20% for the assitants.


My caterer BTW told me specifically that they do not allow an additional gratiuty. 18% was in the bill, that''s all they would accept. I appreciated that. I did not tip my florist, my photographers, or my DJ, and my DOC refused a tip as well. They will all be getting thank you cards and little personalized tokens of appreciation as well.

This would be my exact approach. I give the standard tip for employees, and I tip really great service (above and beyond) if the person owns their own business... whether it''s the person cutting my hair or the guy mowing the lawn. If an owner does more than I paid them for or does a fantastic job, then I show my appreciation.