Wedding How many flower girls can you have?

[galleygal]

How many Flower girls can I have? My niece who is 7, will be 8 by the time I get married asked to be a flower girl. I was thinking I wanted her younger sister who just turned 2 to be the flower girl b/c my fiance has a nephew that is around the same age that could be the ring bearer. Would should I do? I would feel awful if I had to tell her no. Thanks for the help.

 

[saltymuffin]

You can definitely have two. I like older flowergirls, they know what is going on and get such a kick out of playing an important role. Really young ones can end up in tears or need to be carried down the isle. Two sisters would be adorable, and the older one could help the little one figure out what to do, and make her feel comfortable.

 

[galleygal]

Date: 7/14/2008 2:30:43 PM
Author: saltymuffin
You can definitely have two. I like older flowergirls, they know what is going on and get such a kick out of playing an important role. Really young ones can end up in tears or need to be carried down the isle. Two sisters would be adorable, and the older one could help the little one figure out what to do, and make her feel comfortable.

Thanks saltymuffin. Now would they walk down the aisle together and who would walk with the ring bearer then? Don''t the flower girl and ring bearer usually walk down together? Sorry, I''m just not very familiar with this. Thanks!

 

[aprilcait]

Two flowergirls and a ring bearer should be fine. I agree with SaltyMuffin; the older girl might be especially helpful with the 2-year old. The ringbeaer is a toddler too?

 

[saltymuffin]

I would suggest in this situation that the ring bearer go down the aisle himself before the girls.

 

[doodle]

the thing with little kids is they''re usually not going to follow any kind of protocol when they''re little. my cousin had 2 ring bearers and three flower girls, all between age 4 and age 7. they walked bunched up in a little herd, and it was fine. i actually think having more of them works better anyway if you have one really well-behaved child because they''ll follow the leader and they don''t get as intimidated by being in the spotlight. that seven year old could very well be what saves you from having two screaming toddlers throw a tantrum in the middle of the aisle, so the more the merrier, i say...besides, the cute kids are one of the best parts of a wedding!

 

[galleygal]

Thanks for your input guys! Well, the ring bearer will be 3 next year but I thought it would be fitting if he was around the same age as the flower girl...so that''s why I was going to have my little niece be the flower girl. Would it be an odd combination if I had my 7 yr old niece with a 4 yr old ring bearer and that way I could just have one of each? Or do you think the age difference would be too much?

 

[robbie3982]

Date: 7/14/2008 3:09:57 PM
Author: galleygal
Thanks for your input guys! Well, the ring bearer will be 3 next year but I thought it would be fitting if he was around the same age as the flower girl...so that''s why I was going to have my little niece be the flower girl. Would it be an odd combination if I had my 7 yr old niece with a 4 yr old ring bearer and that way I could just have one of each? Or do you think the age difference would be too much?

I was a flower girl in my cousin''s wedding at the age of 24 and the ring bearer was 4, if I remember correctly, so, nope, I don''t think the age diff is too much.

We had 3 flower girls and 3 ring bearers in our wedding last September. 2 of the flower girls were 4 and one was 3.5. The boys were a bit older, but we didn''t have any problems with any of them making it down the aisle. One of our flower girls was the flower girl in another wedding just a few weeks ago (she''s now 4.5) and she burst into tears and ran away as it was her turn to walk down the aisle. Her aunt, who was a BM in the wedding, had to walk back up the aisle to get her and hold her hand as she bawled the whole way down. I definitely think that if they''re younger, the more of them you have going down the aisle at once, the more likely they are to actually make it down the aisle.

 

[saltymuffin]

I really don''t think the age difference is a big deal at all. Some people dress a flower girl and ring bearer up like a little "couple", and having the two of them the same age helps to give that idea. But there is no reason to do that. I actually think it is a bit weird. They don''t have to walk down the isle together even, they can go one after the other. (But like others have said, it can be tough to dictate what they will do anyway!)

 

[julesbeth]

I have two flower girls and no ring bearer. I think your wedding will be just darling with 3 little ones!

My cousin Abby, flower girl #1, will be 6 and her sister Isabelle, #2, will be 3. Abby will def. take the lead and help out little Belle. They are going to be just darling!

 

[havernell]

Date: 7/14/2008 3:09:57 PM
Author: galleygal
Thanks for your input guys! Well, the ring bearer will be 3 next year but I thought it would be fitting if he was around the same age as the flower girl...so that's why I was going to have my little niece be the flower girl. Would it be an odd combination if I had my 7 yr old niece with a 4 yr old ring bearer and that way I could just have one of each? Or do you think the age difference would be too much?

You really don't have to stress about this, trust me! You are not putting on a theater production, you are having a wedding. Therefore, the people who have roles in the wedding should be there because you love them and want them a part of your day, not because they "look the part".

I think it's really cute that your 7/8 year old niece wants to be in the wedding enough to come right out and ask you. I really wouldn't break her little heart and tell her no just because of some arbitrary age cut of.

Finally, if the age/height difference between the flower girl and ring bearer processing down the aisle together is really going to bug you, you could just have the ring bearer enter the church with the groomsman from the side (groomsmen don't usually process down the aisle) and then just have the flower girl come down the aisle by herself.

 

[princesss]

What if you had all three of them walk at the same time? Give the older girl a *slightly* different dress (make her feel older and important) and have her walk between the two. That way you''ve got a "leader" for the little kids to follow.

 

[galleygal]

Very good ideas ladies! Thanks...makes me feel better about this. I think I might just have my 7 yr old niece be the flower girl and my fiance''s 4 yr old nephew be the ring bearer.

 

[Pandora II]

I''ve got 5!

Well, one is 12 so she''s my maid of honour!

 

[winston26]

ooh, fun topic! What I did might work....
We had a 7 yr old ring bearer walk his 3 yr old sister down the aisle. She carried a pomander ball, did not throw flowers.
I then had my 2 nieces (8 and 5), who are sisters, walk behind them and throw the flowers out.
It seemed to work. The 3 yr old is flighty and scared of her own shadow so I knew (A) throwing flowers would be too difficult and (B) it would be best for her big brother to be holding her hand!

My 8 year old niece BEGGGGGGGED me to be the flower girl....before we were engaged! I think they all start being in weddings by that age and apparently her friend was just in one so SHE had to be in one. I''d laugh if that is why your niece flat out asked you too. She usually doesn''t get along with her 5 yr sister but told my mom that "she HAS to have my sister in it too!" Are you sure one won''t be hurt if you don''t ask both????

So my suggestion: have the 2 little ones walk side by side. I doubt they''ll hold hands if they aren''t related, but you never know. Give one a pillow and one a pomander or little basket of flowers to just carry. Then have the older girl toss petals behind them. It actually took a little more skill than I thought but my sweet nieces practiced 6 times because they wanted to get it right! The older girl would be behind them to push them along if need be also.

In the end, the 3 yr old who I was convinced wouldn''t even make it down, did a perfect job. She has the CUTEST smile on her face the whole way down. But the 5 yr old spent the whole 1.5 hrs before the ceremony sobbing yet she is the bravest of the 4 in any other circumstance. She sucked it up and did her job 10 seconds before her cue. You just never know what those lil tikes will end up doing!!!

 

[galleygal]

Date: 7/14/2008 11:56:56 PM
Author: winston26
ooh, fun topic! What I did might work....
We had a 7 yr old ring bearer walk his 3 yr old sister down the aisle. She carried a pomander ball, did not throw flowers.
I then had my 2 nieces (8 and 5), who are sisters, walk behind them and throw the flowers out.
It seemed to work. The 3 yr old is flighty and scared of her own shadow so I knew (A) throwing flowers would be too difficult and (B) it would be best for her big brother to be holding her hand!

My 8 year old niece BEGGGGGGGED me to be the flower girl....before we were engaged! I think they all start being in weddings by that age and apparently her friend was just in one so SHE had to be in one. I''d laugh if that is why your niece flat out asked you too. She usually doesn''t get along with her 5 yr sister but told my mom that ''she HAS to have my sister in it too!'' Are you sure one won''t be hurt if you don''t ask both????

So my suggestion: have the 2 little ones walk side by side. I doubt they''ll hold hands if they aren''t related, but you never know. Give one a pillow and one a pomander or little basket of flowers to just carry. Then have the older girl toss petals behind them. It actually took a little more skill than I thought but my sweet nieces practiced 6 times because they wanted to get it right! The older girl would be behind them to push them along if need be also.

In the end, the 3 yr old who I was convinced wouldn''t even make it down, did a perfect job. She has the CUTEST smile on her face the whole way down. But the 5 yr old spent the whole 1.5 hrs before the ceremony sobbing yet she is the bravest of the 4 in any other circumstance. She sucked it up and did her job 10 seconds before her cue. You just never know what those lil tikes will end up doing!!!

Good idea Winston26. I don''t know if the 2 yr old will be disappointed since she is so young. My niece just asked "Auntie...can I be a flower girl?" She''s adorable. I must admit though that she is quite tall for her age so walking with a little 4 yr old boy might look funny. hehehe I might have her walk behind the younger two...that is a good idea. But I don''t know if the little ones will run the other way!