Wedding How are you making your wedding personal?

[zoebartlett]

This might seem like a silly question, but I''m curious. Some people choose to have photos of the bride and groom and maybe their families displayed. Some people have a theme to their wedding. Others choose to write their own vows. What are you doing?

I can think of a few things we''re doing. We''re not displaying photos of us, although we could have adorned the venue''s mantle if we wanted to. We are having our florist put vases of flowers on the mantle instead, and in different places throughout the venue. I love flowers -- bright, vibrant colors, and soft, muted ones -- all are pretty. Flowers are meaningful to me, so that''s why we''re doing that.

We got engaged at a lighthouse on the coast near where my FI and I used to live -- it''s one of my favorite places to go, even though it can get pretty touristy at times. We had our engagement photos taken at this same lighthouse. Our wedding doesn''t have a theme, but our save the dates, invitations, and thank you cards all have an image of a lighthouse on them.

One of the readings we''re having my 15 year old cousin read was actually written by my students.

How about you?

 

[lucy love]

the most personalized thing we did was make our emblem after his japanese family crest. i used it in our invitations, programs, thank you cards and anything else i could design it in to! oh, and he has the emblem tattooed on his left shoulder.

another thing we did was during the ceremony, we had our parents come up and pray blessings over us and our marriage. it was really intimate and special. i cried!

i''ll probably think of more...

 

[mimzy]

we're not reinventing the wedding wheel with anything we're doing, but we're throwing in a couple personal touches

- lanterns instead of flowers for bridesmaids and alter decor: LOVE candlelight. not huge on flowers.

- processional song: i'm walking down to a jars of clay song that i've loved since 7th grade

- sermon: my uncle is a minister in sweden and while he can't perform the whole service he is going to do the little homily/sermon portion. i'm really looking forward to that

- candle lighting: when they walk in each guest will be given a small taper candle. our moms are going to light the unity candle in the middle of the ceremony and then stefan and i are going to take the candles from them and walk down the center of the aisle lighting the first person's candle as we go (and they'll light the person's next to them and so on). that way everyone will have a lit candle when we say our vows. it's our way of including everyone in the ceremony.

- favors: we're going to make these glazed walnuts that we make every christmas (since i was a little girl) and package them with the recipe for favors. we might also do baklava in addition!

- greek stuff: not individual to me, but we'll equip everyone with a shot of ouzo for a toast and then have the ouzo dance and the kalamatiano, etc.

- music: we're having 'our' type of music played during the cocktail hour. it will only be appreciated by a handful of our friends, everyone else will have to tough it out

- cake: i dont' care what my dad says. i'm having a chocolate costco cake even if i have to pick it up and sneak it in myself!

and obviously all the songs and readings and vows are being chosen for personal reasons, but nothing that the guests would likely pick up on.

 

[sunnyd]

mimzy I love your candle idea! That is so cute! And costco chocolate cake?! I would sneak into your wedding to grab a piece!

 

[mimzy]

Date: 6/23/2008 4:57:56 PM
Author: sunnyd
mimzy I love your candle idea! That is so cute! And costco chocolate cake?! I would sneak into your wedding to grab a piece!

thanks sunnyd! i''m hoping everyone will like it. the ceremony is going to start around 5:15ish at the end of december so it should be pretty dark outside and we''re going to dim the church as much as we can, so hopefully it will be pretty!

and YES! chocolate costco cake is mine and FI''s FAVORITE. i''ll save you a piece.......maybe.

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 6/23/2008 4:44:24 PM
Author: lucy love
the most personalized thing we did was make our emblem after his japanese family crest. i used it in our invitations, programs, thank you cards and anything else i could design it in to! oh, and he has the emblem tattooed on his left shoulder.

another thing we did was during the ceremony, we had our parents come up and pray blessings over us and our marriage. it was really intimate and special. i cried!

i''ll probably think of more...

Lucy, a friend of mine and her husband asked a friend to make an emblem for them as well, and they also had it printed on everything. They ordered way too many napkins though, and up until last year, they were still trying to use them up. They were even giving them to friends to take home with them. They got married 4 years ago. I think they overestimated just a tad.

 

[tenfour]

we are getting married on 10-4 because he was a trucker when we met.

 

[newbie124]

mimzy I also love your candle idea! The lanterns, too. What a neat touch. (Oh, and Costco cake rocks! I don''t know how they do it, but they make the only type of cake icing I would actually ever lick off a plate

)

Since we decided to go the destination wedding route, that also allows us to keep our guest list to only close personal friends and family whom we both know and have met (no random strangers whom we''d be meeting and greeting for the first time), so I also want to be able to incorporate as many personal touches as we can to make the wedding really uniquely ours.

Here''s what I have so far:

- Our destination (Napa) is very "us" as everyone knows how much we''re into food and wine. Also, since I have relatives out there, my family used to go out to Northern CA a lot growing up, so that also has some meaning.

- We''ve asked friends/family to contribute their personal touches...My cousin is going to officiate, FI''s brother will play the guitar part of my processional, my sister''s designing the stationery (and a friend of mine has kindly offered to help letterpress them for me).

- This might be a little too ambitious of a plan, but we''re going to have the caterers serve cookies that we''ll make ourselves. My plan is to make them a few days ahead of them, freeze the dough, and hope that they''d be willing to bake them for us, preferably on-site so they''ll be warm and we get the smell of fresh-baked cookies. Mmm...

- Our first dance song is probably one few people of heard of and is very us...It''s by a French pop band that FI introduced me to when we first met. He first saw them in Paris, then we got a chance to see them in Chicago a couple years ago. I had REALLY wanted to try to get them to play at our wedding (even got a signed note from the lead singer), but unfortunately they won''t be touring and it''d be waaay too expensive to fly them over from France!

- Music is how we met (actually, how I''ve met all of my significant others funny enough...), so we''ll definitely be incorporating some unconventional songs into the playlist, but will still have a lot of recognizable songs people would dance to (I hope

- My cousin did this during our wedding ceremony, and I''m thinking of stealing it: We''ll probably incorporate a truncated traditional Chinese tea ceremony where the bride and groom offer tea to their elders and parents as a sign of respect. Usually aunts and uncles are also included, but for the ceremony we''ll probably just do my grandmother and the parents.

 

[anchor31]

Around here, the norm is usually formal afternoon weddings with a dinner reception, so we''re breaking the mold by having a semi-formal morning wedding. We''re also trying to incoporate as many of our "favorite things" as possible.

- Blue is FI''s favorite colour;
- Daisies are my favorite flowers;
- Brass instruments are my favorite and we''re having a brass quintet for our ceremony music;
- We are using our favorite musical pieces and songs throughout the ceremony and reception;
- We are using a singing duo instead of a DJ for the reception;
- I''m wearing a coloured dress;
- I let the girls pick their dresses and they are not the same, neither will they be wearing the same shoes, hairdo, etc.;
- The blue on my dress doesn''t match the BM''s colour;
- We''re trying to keep everything as low-key and simple as possible (less is more!);
- Lots of DIY, so it''s very personalized;
- FI and I will meet half-way and walk down the rest of the aisle together;
- We tried to personalize the ceremony as much as possible by using different readings and different formulations for the vows and stuff, we''re also kissing before being pronounced husband and wife;
- No money dance, cash bar or anything of the sort, which isn''t the norm around here;
- No cake topper, programs or menu;
- Donation favours to honour my mom''s courage instead of trinkets.

That''s all I can think of right now. But we''re trying to stay away from what people say "people usually do"!

 

[mimzy]

anchor- i love brass instruments too! i would have loved to have a brass quintet for our ceremony - i am so jealous! that is going to be fabulous

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

Let''s see
I have a green dress and no veil
My bouquet is roses and ivy, which Irish brides often carry
my ring bearer is my very pierced 22 year old brother
my maid of honor is a man
I have no wedding band and my ering is one of a kind
one of my BMs will probably die her hair to match the dress
my FI''s wedding band has a pattern from and ancient Irish chalice on it
We have hand picked the music; its classical, but not things you usually hear at a wedding. I will be walking the isle to "greensleeves" since I will, in fact, have green sleeves. We both agreed the Wagner wedding march is a bad idea. It was in an opera and it was the march for a VERY unhappy wedding, so besides being cliche, it also doesn''t seem terribly pleasant.

That''s all I can think of right now

 

[SarahLovesJS]

What a great thread! Everyone is doing such wonderful things and having people add such nice touches. Zoe I <3 lighthouses. Lucy, that is so cool about your DH''s family crest! Mimzy, yummmm cake! Oh and 10-4..my Grandpa was a trucker, so to me I have to say that is totally cute.

Newbie, that''s awesome about your cousin! Anchor, I still love the idea of donations as favors. That is so sweet of you and will mean so much.

S<3Js personalization:

-Our e-pics will be at my university. We met at a different school, but I transferred here and this is where he proposed, so it makes sense I think.
-To copy anchor we''re do our favorite colors (hopefully) pink and green. Mine is pink and his is green.
-We''re going to have very personalized invitations and save the dates. Our save the dates will tell our story essentially which will be neat I think!
-We were going to do a Japanese theme since we both

Japan so much and met by way of Japan, but..nope. It''s been scrapped. So now we''re doing a floral theme. Jya Ne Japan!
-We''re going to have ladies playing the harp and flute and they''re going to play songs that mean a lot to us. I think the bridal party will walk to the Somewhere in Time theme song which is one of my favorite movies and it is my Mom''s favorite movie.
-Speaking of the bridal party, my Mom is my matron of honor, and FI''s sisters are bridesmaids.
-DJ is going to play a crazy variety of music (once I have a DJ that is), but I am going to pick songs we like and have a must play and do not play list. No bad songs ahh!
-I think we picked a special venue because while there are tons of weddings there, since it is a public place, we can take our kids there one day and show them where we got married!

-I am thinking of letting the BMs wear different colors as well as different dresses and doing a range of colors. My Mom in a pink, one of his sisters in green, and one in a blue, and if I have my friend as BM she could wear a peach or yellow. I know someone on PS is doing this, but I can''t remember who. Is it you Zoe?
-We''re thinking about personalizing some of our vows, I think it would be sweet.
-While I bought a lovely ring pillow, I am thinking about only having an honorary ring bearer and/or flower girl. The only little boy I know is a bit too young to actually walk down the aisle. He''ll only be about 2 and a half at the time of the wedding.
-I am thinking about doing fan programs for the ceremony or designing programs.
-We want to either do personalized candy as favors or candy apples! Buttercup I think is doing candy apples, someone is. I thought about this recently and found a place that does them for about $3.99 each. So I am going to consider it! Man I love apples.
-Oh and the wedding cake! I am thinking about doing a strawberry shortcake wedding cake. With a vanilla/yellow cake, strawberry filling, white buttercream filling, white buttercream icing on the outside, and then strawberries on top!

Perfect for a summer wedding. I also thing our reception will be a summer picnic/bbq theme. And we''re thinking about doing a signature cocktail of pink lemonade and vodka or something like that.

That''s enough for now, if I think of more I will add later, but I don''t want to overwhelm everyone!

 

[Neveah]

We got married last month....

We had our videographer do something called a "same day edit"..
A couple weeks before the wedding he interviewed hubby and I seperately... how we met, fell in love, got engaged..sports obsessions...

Then put together a 10 minute video with sound bytes and left "blank spaces" where he put in footage from our actual ceremony only 2 hours before.... which had our "voice overs" talking about seeing each other while I was walking down the aisle, saying our vows, etc. Then showed in towards the end of dinner on a giant screen.

Kind of magic! People were stunned that footage was already in there. And thanks to our amazing videographer (he did some fantastic editing and made us appear very funny!) it was a smash hit! No one had ever seen that at a wedding before and just loved it!

 

[rockzilla]

Wow! I''m afraid our wedding is not going to be ''personal'' at all...let me think...

-All amazing vegetarian food (we''ve vegetarian)
-Ice tea/lemonade bar (I love arnold palmers)
-Engagement photos in Claremont where we met


Do I need to have more ideas to make it more personal? Areas I was thinking that might work:

-Unique table names (don''t know what yet)
-Something to do with New England (where I''m from)
-Lavender soaps as favors (lavender is my favorite)

Does it count that we''re having it in a chapel, rather than outdoors/on the beach (which is what most people do in Malibu)?

 

[anchor31]

Date: 6/23/2008 6:54:31 PM
Author: mimzy
anchor- i love brass instruments too! i would have loved to have a brass quintet for our ceremony - i am so jealous! that is going to be fabulous

Yeah, I''m really excited about that. I never really envisionned my wedding day growing up, but this was something I''ve wanted for years. I''ve been playing the trumpet for (wow) 12 years now and I had to integrate that in my wedding! Since I''ve been playing for so long, I know quite a few profesional musicians, and a friend offered to put this together for me, for free! All I have to pay for is their gas. Apart from the getting married part, that''s actually what I''m most excited about.

 

[Stephanie]

Date: 6/23/2008 7:24:02 PM
Author: SarahLovesJS
-We want to either do personalized candy as favors or candy apples! Buttercup I think is doing candy apples, someone is. I thought about this recently and found a place that does them for about $3.99 each. So I am going to consider it! Man I love apples.

www.daffyapples.com does the apples for about a dollar a piece. That''s who we are using for our caramel apples. I think that you can get them without the crunchy stuff on there.

 

[Courtneylub]

tenfour - that is so cute!

We are personalizing our in a lot of ways. No bridal party or dad(s) walking me down the aisle. We just want it to be the 2 of us...really intimate.

We are writing our own vows and all the ceremony music is very personal to us.

 

[mimzy]

Date: 6/23/2008 11:14:17 PM
Author: rockzilla
Wow! I'm afraid our wedding is not going to be 'personal' at all...let me think...


-All amazing vegetarian food (we've vegetarian)

-Ice tea/lemonade bar (I love arnold palmers)

-Engagement photos in Claremont where we met



Do I need to have more ideas to make it more personal? Areas I was thinking that might work:


-Unique table names (don't know what yet)

-Something to do with New England (where I'm from)

-Lavender soaps as favors (lavender is my favorite)


Does it count that we're having it in a chapel, rather than outdoors/on the beach (which is what most people do in Malibu)?

rockzilla i don't think that you have anything to be worried about at all! i think that there is so much pressure on brides these days to be "different" and "unique" and the like that people don't focus on what they like, but what they can do to set their wedding apart....which is so wrong. if it makes you happy, do it. there's no reason to try to rack your brain trying to find something to 'individualize' your wedding. the fact that it's your groom and yourself saying your vows make it about as individual as you can make it anyways

people put way too much emphasis and worth into the whole 'wow, look at how DIFFERENT we are' trap. the only thing you should be worried about is if you and your FI are happy with your choices, which i'm assuming you are! people are going to enjoy your wedding no matter what, and no matter how mind blowingly creative we may think an idea is, it's probably not going to get nearly as much attention as we presume it will in our heads!

that said, i think an all veggie dinner and an iced tea/lemonade bar are AWESOME personal touches (says the arnold palmer fanatic) and i know i've never seen that before

 

[bee*]

There''s nothing really too special about what we''ve planned other than that we love it all.
We''re getting married in a large Irish castle.
We''re having the dublin gospel choir play at our ceremony.
We''re having lots of Rose champagne as it''s my favourite tipple!
We''re having a big swing band play at the reception.
We''re having personalised cake toppers of D, Amber and I made.

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 6/23/2008 7:24:02 PM
Author: SarahLovesJS



-I am thinking of letting the BMs wear different colors as well as different dresses and doing a range of colors. My Mom in a pink, one of his sisters in green, and one in a blue, and if I have my friend as BM she could wear a peach or yellow. I know someone on PS is doing this, but I can''t remember who. Is it you Zoe?

Nope. I''m pretty sure it''s Haven. I''m just having my sister up there with us (well, and the best man) and she''s wearing an indigo colored dress.

I love all your ideas (and everyone else''s)!

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Date: 6/24/2008 8:44:31 PM
Author: ZoeBartlett

Date: 6/23/2008 7:24:02 PM

Author: SarahLovesJS




-I am thinking of letting the BMs wear different colors as well as different dresses and doing a range of colors. My Mom in a pink, one of his sisters in green, and one in a blue, and if I have my friend as BM she could wear a peach or yellow. I know someone on PS is doing this, but I can't remember who. Is it you Zoe?

Nope. I'm pretty sure it's Haven. I'm just having my sister up there with us (well, and the best man) and she's wearing an indigo colored dress.


I love all your ideas (and everyone else's)!

Ohhh yes it is Haven I believe!! And Stephanie thank you for the apple link, I am going to check it out!


ETA: Some things I forgot somehow: we're thinking of using my parent's cake server, we're going to put photos around from our parents' weddings and of our grandparents, and I'd like to try to display our parents' cake toppers.