Happy Mother''s Day, you''re gonna be a G-Ma

[Lilac]

Congratulations! That''s so exciting!

 

[purrfectpear]

Seriously this is the first time I''ve ever gotten my tummy in a knot over something. Not over him being deployed (some 6 times now), not over buying a condo, or letting the last one go...but this. Who knew. Nervous tummy.

As to getting married or not, I didn''t want to ask (''cause I didn''t want to seem like I was prying during "this" phone call). I''ll probably ask him their plans next time though.

He did say one thing that really made my day. I was the first one he told because as he said "he knew I wouldn''t freak out, wouldn''t get mad, and wouldn''t rain on his parade". I thought about that after I hung up and it hit me, I did OK as a mom. Because that''s exactly how I wanted him to feel. Like he could tell me about the important things in life without dreading the phone call

Hah, I beat his dad out on that one!!! Dad was always the Disney dad, you know the type...no rules, lot''s of money, quick to put me down. I was the mom with rules, that disciplined, that said no, etc. I can''t help feeling a little smug that I was the one he called.

I really don''t have any strong feelings about whether he should get married or not. I like the girl fine. My concern would be that I think maybe she loves him more than he loves her? That''s not a bad deal for him, but for longevity? I dunno. I do know that he''s really anti-divorce, so I suspect if they do get married he''ll stick it out for the long term. As to rights and all that, things are pretty cut and dried in California. You both share legal custody and the mom gets physical custody unless one you is an axe murderer, and in California they might even overlook that. If they stay together then they''ll share expenses. If they go separate ways, California uses Santa Clara guidelines based on the father''s income and you pay child support for the next 18 years. There''s not much to argue over, though sometimes the men think there is. Best to save on attorney fees and just go with the guidelines. It''s what you''ll end up with anyway.

Thanks for all the well wishes. I''m still getting used to the idea that my son is having a kid. The fact that I''ll be a grandma doesn''t seem weird at all. It''s the fact that HE''s having a kid. What a surprise

 

[Linda W]

PP, I am sure you raised him well, and he will do the right thing.

 

[TravelingGal]

Bahahaha!

Oh I laughed. LAUGHED. But a good good laugh.

Congrats PP...doesn''t surprise me that your tummy is in knots. You''re not made of steel ya know, no matter how you come across on Pricescope. I''m happy for you...I think the best thing about having kids is that you hopefully get to be a grandparent some day. You''ll find out if that is true soon enough!!!

 

[luckystar112]

Date: 5/10/2009 10:55:11 PM
Author: FrekeChild

Date: 5/10/2009 3:48:09 PM
Author: Steel

Nope not a requirement. But it does neatly solidify a father's rights - something not to be taken lightly. This of course can be done legally by other means but however it happens (IMHO) it needs to be done.

Yes, that's what every little girl dreams of. Getting pregnant and then the father wanting to marry you TO SOLIDIFY A FATHER'S RIGHTS. Not because he actually wants to marry her.

People should get married because they want to. IMHO.

Jumping in on the off-topic discussion for a second....

I don't think Steel was saying that at ALL, hence why she mentioned that establishing paternal rights could be done legally by other means as well. I agree with her that parental rights is something that should be established as soon as possible, while things are still "peachy", because you never know what could happen down the road. That said, I know PP didn't raise no dummy.

I'm happy for you, Grandma.

I can tell you're excited. I love the way he told you the news and I think it's so cute that he was reading a book on fatherhood!

 

[luckystar112]

Date: 5/10/2009 11:51:02 PM
Author: Linda W
PP, I am sure you raised him well, and he will do the right thing.

Ditto!

 

[Shoopy]

Congrats PP! Although I think you are way too young to be a grandma (my Mother’s Day gift to you haha).

Such an exciting time for you! Should we be expecting you to turn into a big puddle of goo?

Don’t worry about the whole marriage thing. Better they stay bf/gf and get married when/if they feel the time is right than force a marriage neither really wants for the sake of the baby. They’ll figure it out. And from what I hear, babies will still cry at all hours of the night and drive everyone crazy regardless of whether mom and dad are husband and wife

 

[Deelight]

That is fantastic news PP I wish you and the new parents and baby all the best - how utterly exciting

 

[babysteps]

That is such sweet news to get on Mother''s Day - congratulations PP!

 

[CNOS128]

Congratulations, PP! What a beautiful surprise. Everyone I know who is a grandmother has reaped such great joy from the experience! And it''s a wonderful thing that your son felt like he could talk to you without being judged. That says so much about you and your relationship with him.

 

[Dandi]

Yippee PP, that is so exciting!! How awesome that you were the one your son felt he needed to go to first, you done real good, mamma!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

So, what'll ya be?

Grandma? Nanna? Grammy? My mum often wonders what she'll be called one of these days if she becomes a grandmother! She's gramma to my dogs at the moment, so will probably need to come up with something else for potential grandkids

 

[allycat0303]

Congrats to your son! And to you of course!

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

YAY!!! PP this is great news, I''m so happy for you and your family.

 

[geckodani]

Congrats PP! And double congrats on raising a son that called YOU first!

 

[Lauren8211]

Fantastic news, PP!

Congratulations!

 

[Dancing Fire]

Congrats PP !!

 

[sba771]

Mazel Tov!

 

[InLuv101]

Awww, how sweet PP! My mom says being a Grandma is the most wonderful thing! Congrats to you!

 

[Lorelei]

Congrats PP!

 

[princesss]

Congratulations to you, your son, and his GF. (And a *pffffffffffffft* to his dad that you were the first one to know.

)

It sounds like you raised a great guy, and I''m sure he''ll be a great dad.

Best wishes to them for a happy, healthy 9 months and delivery.

 

[tlh]

That is wonderful news!!!! Congratulations!!!

 

[Irishgrrrl]

YAY!!! Congratulations, PP! I''m sure you''ll be a "purrfect" gramma!

 

[Skippy123]

Congrats woman!

 

[curlygirl]

PP, congratulations on your wonderful news!!! Just from what I know about you from your posts, you''ve done a great job with your son and I know that you will be a fantastic grandmother! Enjoy!!!

 

[iheartscience]

Congratulations! And what an awesome way to tell you!

(Wow, PP as a grandma-not something I imagined!

)

 

[Bia]

CONGRATULATIONS G-MA! (I like the sound of that!)

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 5/10/2009 11:45:55 PM
Author: purrfectpear


I really don't have any strong feelings about whether he should get married or not. I like the girl fine. My concern would be that I think maybe she loves him more than he loves her? That's not a bad deal for him, but for longevity? I dunno. I do know that he's really anti-divorce, so I suspect if they do get married he'll stick it out for the long term. As to rights and all that, things are pretty cut and dried in California. You both share legal custody and the mom gets physical custody unless one you is an axe murderer, and in California they might even overlook that. If they stay together then they'll share expenses. If they go separate ways, California uses Santa Clara guidelines based on the father's income and you pay child support for the next 18 years. There's not much to argue over, though sometimes the men think there is. Best to save on attorney fees and just go with the guidelines. It's what you'll end up with anyway.

There are no religious or philosophical reasons I see for them getting married. My reasoning is for insurance purposes. I assume the mother-to-be had good insurance?

My husband and I were together 8 years before getting married and the primary reason for marrying was because he was covered by employment and I had two PT jobs and was not.

Either way, whatever is planned out, to you, your son, & his GF, congrats again! Seems like being a grandparent would be SO much more fun than being a mom. Possibly kick back and be the "fun," non-discipling type? You can feed the child ice cream for dinner and do so guilt free!

 

[lliang_chi]

Wow PP! That''s fantastic news!!! Big congratulations!!!

 

[lucyandroger]

Congrats PP! What great news...that''s wonderful that your son and his GF are both excited.

 

[purrfectpear]

Mommy-to-be is an LA County sheriff. Daddy is in the Air Force. Between them I imagine they have some pretty terrific health care coverage.

Good thing Great-Grammy's are still alive on both sides, I can't knit or crochet