Wedding Giving a gift when you''re not invited?

[Clairitek]

I did a search through some of the gift giving threads and didn''t find anything too specific about the question I have.

I have some friends in grad school and an ex boyfriend that I am friendly with that got married/are getting married this year. I want to get them each a small gift to celebrate their wedding. If you were getting married and received a gift from someone you didn''t invite would you feel strange about it? I don''t want to make anyone feel bad about not inviting me or anything, I just want to send something that says "I''m happy for you and I hope you had/have a wonderful time! Congrats on getting married."

Is this weird/creepy? Would you feel bad at all that you didn''t invite the gift giver to your wedding if you received something in this manner?

 

[Cleopatra]

We received several gifts from family friends who were not invited to the wedding - most of those sent the gift after the wedding.

My DH''s grandmother sends a gift to many of her friend''s grandchildren even though she and her husband are usually not invited since they are not close family. She always makes it a point to send the gift after the wedding so to not make the bride and groom feel as though they should send them an invite - the gift isn''t meant to "pressure" anyone - simply given to celebrate the union of two people!

If I were you, I would send the gift after the wedding congratulating them on their recent marriage.

 

[Clairitek]

Date: 10/7/2008 3:34:37 PM
Author: Cleopatra
We received several gifts from family friends who were not invited to the wedding - most of those sent the gift after the wedding.


My DH''s grandmother sends a gift to many of her friend''s grandchildren even though she and her husband are usually not invited since they are not close family. She always makes it a point to send the gift after the wedding so to not make the bride and groom feel as though they should send them an invite - the gift isn''t meant to ''pressure'' anyone - simply given to celebrate the union of two people!


If I were you, I would send the gift after the wedding congratulating them on their recent marriage.

Thanks for the response. I intend on doing just that- after the wedding. Glad to hear that this isn''t some strange thing that I want to do that is a major etiquette no-no.

 

[neatfreak]

I think it''s very sweet and second the idea of doing it after the wedding so there is no misunderstanding about the intent.

 

[Haven]

We received several gifts from people who were not invited to our wedding. I thought it was incredibly thoughtful and sweet of them to send gifts. Many were from my own and my mother''s colleagues, and several of DH''s clients sent gifts as well.

I have probably sent about three gifts to couples when I wasn''t invited to the wedding. I think it''s a kind gesture when you feel compelled to do so.

 

[ladypirate]

I''ve done this as well--it''s totally fine.

 

[Blair138]

Don''t feel weird, I gave a gift to a girl whom I recently became close with but was not invited to her wedding...no weirdness

 

[Gypsy]

We recieved some lovely gifts from people we couldn't invite. They all understood the limitation, and wanted to send us something to congratulate our union. Honestly, their gifts in a lot of ways mean the most. I don't know if that makes sens. Just really highlights the friendship and kinship. I agree with sending them after the wedding however.