Getting Over Heartbreak and Disappointment

[oddoneout]

What are some ways people get over heartbreak and disappointment? Some examples could be getting over not getting into the school you wanted, missing out on a good deal, issues with relationships or work. I''m curious to see how people cope.

 

[susimoo]

Honestly,

Time normally is the cure. However, in the meantime I fill my time with my nearest and dearest and do the things I love best. I shop, I eat out, I go for a drink, I see a show or a movie and I chew the proverbial ear off a good friend! If it is a broken heart I always found kissing a LOT of Mr Wrongs really helped!

 

[Matata]

The first thing I do is allow myself to grieve the situation and absorb disappointment -- and I mean jumping in with both feet -- weeping and wailing like a banshee until the tears run dry, indulging in all my comfort foods simultaneously (chocolate & mashed potatoes anyone?), and generally allowing myself to reach a state of emotional exhaustion over the issue. Depending on the nature of the heartbreak/disappointment this high drama runs anywhere from 1 day to a few weeks. Then I''m done and I move on.

 

[kama_s]

I think about all the others areas in my life where I''ve been so blessed and lucky. Gets me out of a funk in a jiffy.

 

[HVVS]

kissing a LOT of Mr Wrongs really helped!

Unless you live where I live, and all of the Mr. Wrongs are so-o-o-o-o-o-o much losers that there's no way in Hades that you'd kiss any of them, lol.

Move on. Sometimes literally. That's what I am doing next. I have given this town enough chance to prove that it has something to offer than drunks, old folks, stupid small town family life, and poverty and decay. So, I'm calling it quits and moving in a few months. Am I disappointed? Yes. I'd planned to relocate here, start a new career, find a mate, buy a house. And nothing worked out. It's been noting but TRASHY lifestyles, and sleeze, and sh** all the way. I never dreamed a locale could have such a low caliber pool of single people, but it does. So, sometimes what you are looking for is not where you are, and you really do need to move to find it.

If one school turns you down, apply to several until you get one that likes what you have to offer. The local diploma nursing school wait-listed me, when I have more than adequate qualifications and ability to succeed in their program. But a much more prestigious and academically strong school in a really good geographic location quickly picked me up, and that will all work out better for me. Call a loser a loser, and leave 'em in your dust. Don't cry over it. Walk.

 

[jewelz617]

Time, and lots of evenings out with friends. Great families always help the healing process too.

 

[4ever]

First I let myself be misserable- curl up in bed and cry untill it dosn''t hurt anymore.
Then maybe I''ll do somthing that makes me feel good, a trashy movie, some comfort food, dressing up nice, doing somthing productive or nice fo someone else.
Then I will count my blessings, tell myself it wasn''t ment to be and somthing better will come out of it.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

Regarding heartbreak: There are some things that you just never get over . When the grief comes, you need to let yourself greieve.
Regarding disappointment: Time is the only answer.

 

[MissGotRocks]

Date: 3/28/2010 7:55:37 PM
Author: Madam Bijoux
Regarding heartbreak: There are some things that you just never get over . When the grief comes, you need to let yourself greieve.
Regarding disappointment: Time is the only answer.

I like the way you think - reminds me of me!

Very well said and very true. . .

 

[Iowa Lizzy]

I start with Ben & Jerry''s. I talk to my family and friends. I reread "It''s Called a Breakup Because it''s Broken" and "He''s Just Not That Into You" by Greg Behrendt. I try to make sure I don''t drink too much and wallow on Friday and Saturday nights.

I avoid romantic movies like the plague. The movie Old School got me through my toughest heartbreak in college. Will Farrell + Vince Vaughn + Luke Wilson + no romantic backstory = a movie that can make me laugh, not cry. I definitely take time to grieve the loss of the relationship, but seeing movies or other shows on TV where people are happy, and love conquers all in the end don''t help me in the least.

I remind myself that there are a million fish in the sea. I remind myself that an hour becomes a day, a day becomes a week, a week becomes a month and know that I''ll get stronger and stronger and it will get easier and easier. I remind myself that I don''t miss any off my other exes anymore. If anything, I''m always thankful I''m not still with all those Mr. Wrongs anymore.

 

[honey22]

Hmmm, check out my post in the ''how much do you drink'' thread, you should find the answer there

 

[movie zombie]

all the above....

i believe in wallowing in self-pity for a bit and then realizing others have it much worse.....seems that while i''m wallowing in that self-pity pool, some strange will start a conversation with me and i''l soon find i''m glad i have my problems and not theirs.

mz

 

[Haven]

I follow a pretty standard pattern when I''m truly heartbroken over something:

Sob. Sob. Sob. Usually alone, sometimes over the phone with one of my sisters, and occasionally on DH''s shoulder.

Then I spend a few days being very quiet, and thinking over everything that happened.

Then I rent my favorite movies, reread my favorite books, and listen to my favorite songs on my iPod repeatedly.

Eventually, I realize that everything is okay, and I move on. I suppose that would be time''s role in my personal process of getting over things.

If it''s really bad, I get a dramatic new haircut, or I adopt some new obsession that completely monopolizes my time until I am able to face whatever happened.

 

[bee*]

I agree that time is usually the main way that I truly get over disappointment. I normally cry and curl up in bed with Amber and then indulge in some comfort food. Over time I usually get over it.

 

[junebug17]

I allow myself to have a pity party for a bit...I give into the feelings and allow myself to feel sad and upset...it also helps me a lot to talk to someone about it -relative, friend, dh, anyone who will listen lol. Time is a great healer, after a period of time I''m feeling better and have the ability to look on the bright side of things. Takes a little while to reach that point though.

 

[OUpearlgirl]

I exercise a lot when I am upset or stressed out. I also probably drink a bit more wine than I do when all is well...