Wedding Frustrated with wedding details after the fact.

[Sabine]

Anyone else have trouble letting go of little things that went wrong even if they had a fabulous wedding?

Overall, I was ecstatic with our wedding. But I am currently trying to order our wedding photos, and the little things that went wrong continue to plague me. The main one is my hair. Not only did my stylist arrive a bit late and take so long that I missed my makeup appt. so that I had to take my MOH's appt. (which left her scrambling to find someone else), she made a change from the trial that I didn't notice until it was too late. At my trial, she had pulled my hair back and braided a couple small strands so that the hair would be pulled back tightly and to sort of deal with all of my thick hair so it didn't all have to be curled. I knew there were braids, but they weren't visible AT ALL at my trial. On the day of, I had one big braid on the side of my hair!

I really want to let this go, but we're ordering our pictures, and in all of the pictures that I would want to have for our large portrait, you can clearly see this braid and it drives me crazy! My photographer sent me the proof of the one I chose, and I had to ask her to change it because I can't stand my hair! (BTW, I did decide to purchase the rights to reprint, so as soon as I get the cd of images, I will post some pro pics, I know they are overdue around here

)

ETA: Photo courtesy of Dana Scheller photography!

I know it's stupid to be so hung up on this little detail, but it really makes me dislike a lot of pictures that I would otherwise love! Anyone else want to vent about details they can't get over so I don't feel so petty?

 

[oobiecoo]

My wedding cake was lumpy and crooked.

We initially brought her some very simple designs because she was the owner of the reception facility and I didn''t know how elaborate her cakes were and I wasn''t too picky. She then showed us some pictures of her cakes from weddings and they were AMAZING and sooo fancy! So we chose a slightly more elaborate design but nothing crazy... a little trim, a few dots, our last name initial.

Well, we walked into the reception and the cakes were the first thing I noticed. She put flowers on top instead of the dipped strawberries we had discussed. The icing was droopy and the trim was crooked. The groom''s cake was even worse. I''ve talked about it a couple of times on here and I tell everyone I know about it... partially because I don''t want them to think I actually CHOSE a cake that looked that way or LIKED the way it looked.

 

[LostSapphire]

Date: 9/12/2008 7:48:05 PM
Author:Sabine
Anyone else have trouble letting go of little things that went wrong even if they had a fabulous wedding?

Overall, I was ecstatic with our wedding. But I am currently trying to order our wedding photos, and the little things that went wrong continue to plague me. The main one is my hair. Not only did my stylist arrive a bit late and take so long that I missed my makeup appt. so that I had to take my MOH''s appt. (which left her scrambling to find someone else), she made a change from the trial that I didn''t notice until it was too late. At my trial, she had pulled my hair back and braided a couple small strands so that the hair would be pulled back tightly and to sort of deal with all of my thick hair so it didn''t all have to be curled. I knew there were braids, but they weren''t visible AT ALL at my trial. On the day of, I had one big braid on the side of my hair!

I really want to let this go, but we''re ordering our pictures, and in all of the pictures that I would want to have for our large portrait, you can clearly see this braid and it drives me crazy! My photographer sent me the proof of the one I chose, and I had to ask her to change it because I can''t stand my hair! (BTW, I did decide to purchase the rights to reprint, so as soon as I get the cd of images, I will post some pro pics, I know they are overdue around here

)

ETA: Photo courtesy of Dana Scheller photography!

I know it''s stupid to be so hung up on this little detail, but it really makes me dislike a lot of pictures that I would otherwise love! Anyone else want to vent about details they can''t get over so I don''t feel so petty?

And that, my friend, is why God created PhotoShop! There are quite a few talented people here on PS, and many more out there in the world. For SURE someone could make it right for you!

LS

 

[oobiecoo]

I know its not what you wanted... but I actually think the braid is kind of pretty

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 9/12/2008 8:24:23 PM
Author: oobiecoo
I know its not what you wanted... but I actually think the braid is kind of pretty

Hahaha-me too! But I second the photoshop idea. It should be easy enough!

 

[neatfreak]

Sabine, I think it's unfortunately one of those things that you just have to let go so that you can enjoy your pictures otherwise the braid will be all you see when you look at your pictures (and it shouldn't be because it is a BEAUTIFUL shot!). I agree with the others, I don't mind the braid at all!

But if I may say one thing, the reason the braid is sticking out so much IMO is your highlights, not the braid itself. So if you toned down the highlights in photoshop to more of your other haircolor it would blend a LOT more.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

I felt the same way as well after my wedding. It was such an amazing day, but the little things that went wrong nagged at me.

And you looked really lovely...and the picture is beautiful. I can see your happiness and excitement, in that picture--you capture the essence of how a wedding day should feel. And as a stylist, I noticed the braid...but in a totally good way. It added character and texture to your hair. However, if it is something that will haunt you, maybe you could picture another picture where you don''t see it?

 

[Sha]

Ahhh.... I can identify with that. My hair sucked too - for a lot of silly reasons. I didn't make a hair appointment till the NIGHT BEFORE the wedding (because I figured I'd just do my hair on my own as usual) - but we got stuck in traffic in Barbados and I was an hour and a half for the appointment, so I called to cancel. When we got off the bus at the hotel, I realized the hairdressers were still at the salon, but I was too chicken to go and ask them to do my hair at that late hour. So basically, my friends ended up doing my hair (twisting it) at 1:00 am (for an 9:00 am wedding, mind you!). I thought it would be good experience for us to bond and everything, but they kind of argued with me about my hair products and ended up NOT using the product I always use on my hair. I should have trusted my own judgement and not let them pressure me into not using it...

So basically, my hair was a big pouffy disaster.

It looked about 5 times worse than my hair on a regular day!!

My make-up was another story...

A bad one.

So I can relate to your feeling bad when you look back at your pictures. I do too....but then, most times things tend to go wrong when you want them to go perfectly. It's just one of those things that happens. Just life I guess. My mother's wedding had a lot of

moments too. You can't change it now... so just try to remember all of the positive things about your wedding. I'm sure there were many of them, by the looks of it!

 

[marchswallowbird]

Sabine, as Italia mentioned, the first thing I notice about that photo is how incredibly happy and in love you both look. I also saw the braid, but assumed it was the way you wanted your hair, because it looked so nice! I thought it was a really beautiful and unique hairstyle! Do you think your feelings about your hair will fade over time? That really is a great photo, I would hate for you to give up on it and not have it around to look back on to remember your joy 20 years from now.

 

[D2B]

Ok, well I lreally like the braid, so from an impartial perspective, it looks great and adds unique texture. However you can always get someone to work some magic with photoshop at a later date, but keep the orginals, you might find years later you really like it.

congratualations on your wedding
d2b

 

[Maisie]

I also think the braid looks very pretty.

 

[Rhea]

This is going to come across as condescending I fear, but chances are you will stop thinking about the details. I was really pleased for the few weeks. Then it wore off and I started picking at details. After about a year I just got over it and finally hung our wedding photos on the wall. There are still a couple of photos that annoy me, but no one sees those except DH and I. It seems weird, but a couple of my close friends went through this as well, disapointed with certain details afterward. It was nice to talk to each other about it since our husbands and not recently married friends didn''t quite understand the obsession.

Your photo is beautiful. You and your DH are clearly having a good time. I hope that in a bit of time you are able to appreciate the smaller details of your photos and wedding.

 

[tberube]

I know what you''re going through, Sabine. Same thing is happening to me.

My hair didn''t come out as good on the wedding day as it did on the trial, and I hate that I didn''t persist in having the stylist change it. I had a big, crusty zit on my cheek that was just at its worst on my wedding day and I couldn''t cover it up. I''m still a little upset at the wedding coordinator for not being around to lead people to the ceremony room, so instead everyone was calling me and trying to get ME to take them to the ballroom where the ceremony was. Then the florist forgot my Grampa''s boutonniere and we had to take apart someone else''s corsage to give him one.

After the ceremony, my aunt invited 3X more people than I paid for to join us in the picture room for the open bar, and now I''ll have to pay that bill. I didn''t get to eat any of my wedding food or cake because I was too busy with guests. I forgot to dance with my grampa. It rained throughout the entire reception and almost everyone left early because of it. I spent too much time on the dance floor and not enough time chatting with my guests. At our last dance, during the song that was so meaningful for me, some of DH''s family members cut in and we didn''t get to dance with each other.

Then the next day, I left behind the top tier of our wedding cake because my MOH left it in our hotel room fridge, and the hotel threw it away. Then they refused to pay for the $40 replacement.

The wedding was wonderful, but I am literally up late at night going over these little flubs in my brain. Does this happen to everyone?

 

[Haven]

I can''t get over our horrible pictures. I know I have to, and I know I can''t do anything about it now, but they have marred my memory of the day.

I can''t even talk about them. It makes me cry whenever I think about it. I told hubby that I do not want a wedding album, and we don''t have any pictures from the wedding anywhere in the house. Even seeing the candids that our friends and family took makes me upset because it reminds me of our awful photographer photos.

My colleagues are all pestering me to see pictures because they''re so sweet and they always say that they heard how beautiful everything was, and I just keep telling them that we haven''t gotten the proofs yet because I just don''t want to talk about it.

So, yes, I totally know how you feel Sabine. I''m hoping I can get over it because I''m not one to harbor negative feelings about anything, but at the moment it makes me feel absolutely ill whenever I think about our photos. In fact, I''m crying about it right now because I''m such a baby.

For what it''s worth Sabine, I think you and your hair looked absolutely beautiful on your wedding day.

 

[SeattleSweetheart]

I know what you''re going through. After my first wedding I did the exact same thing. The wedding was wonderful, but there were some small details that didn''t meet my expectations and I couldn''t let them go.

I''m hoping that after my second wedding I will not do the same thing because it was very uncomfortable to be so happy about finally getting married, but also be disappointed about such a special day, especially since it really was wonderful.

For what it''s worth, I think the braid is pretty in your hair. But if you don''t like it, definitely pick a picture that doesn''t highlight it or photoshop it out.

It certainly is clear from the look on your face in your pictures, that you are very, very happy to be marrying your husband!

 

[Sabine]

Thanks for all your responses and support!

We decided to order a different picture as our large portrait and just order a 5x7 of that picture.

Just a couple of responses: Thanks to all who like the shot and who think the braid doesn''t look bad! It''s nice to have the reassurance.

To those who suggested photoshopping the braid...I have to admit, I''m a bit hesitant to ask my photographer to do this. She was so great at the wedding and leading up to it, but ever since, I think she has gotten crazy busy, and every question I ask seems to take a bit for her to get back to me. I''ve wanted to buy the rights to reprint since I first saw the proofs, and I told her that, but it took a while for her to send me an invoice so I could pay for it, and now she isn''t sending the cd of images until the print order is ready to be shipped too (I don''t live where I got married, and she was local). So if I asked her to photoshop it, I could see it turning into this long process of going back and forth and holding up me getting the pictures I want so badly. It was easier just to pick a different pose.

Neatfreak, as for the highlights...they are exaggerated due to the stylizing effect that the photog. did on the photo (something called btwo?) that makes the colors more enhanced. I LOVE the effect on the picture overall, but it does make the braid stand out even more than usual.

Sha and tberube, I am so sorry you had so many problems at your weddings. Thanks for sharing your stories, it really helped me put my complaint in perspective.

Addy, you weren''t condescending at all, and that is really how I want to feel. I want to just let it go, so I hope in time it just won''t bother me anymore.

Haven, I''m so sorry you are still struggling with your photos. I was really hoping your photog. would be able to work a miracle and come up with shots that you were at least moderately happy with in the end.

 

[violet3]

I am late coming in here, but i have to say i am glad that you got THAT picture, at least in a 5x7 becuase it is beautiful! And like many others said i think the braid is very pretty on you - i like it!

i do have to say though, i didn''t really notice it at all because you just looked so darn happy and so does your husband - that''s what stands out in that picture, not the hair. i promise

 

[tenfour]

for what it''s worth, i looked at the picture before reading your post and my first thought was ''that braid is pretty''.