Fight or Flight?

[Tacori E-ring]

Thanks for all the replies. Looks like we have "fighters" amongst us! The whole situation happened SO fast! I think I pulled over because I thought there may be something wrong with my car. A similar thing happened when I was young and one of my tires was dangerously loose. I thought the car would pull up NEXT to me not park behind me. In my state we do not have front plates so I would have had to follow her a bit to write down her plate number (oh and it was pitch black outside). I felt "trapped" as well b/c my neighborhood is all dead ends but next time I am making a "u" turn and driving to a safe place. Lesson learned! Even though it ended up not being a dangerous situation, circumstances could have been different. Maybe this is my "trial run."

Jewelerman, I don't know why I stopped! The person was SOOO persistent I think I was almost more scared not to. Plus I thought maybe there was something wrong with my car or something. My logic was impaired!

Part gypsy, wow! What a scary situation. I am glad you weren't hurt! That was some quick thinking. I, appear, to be a deer in headlights and freeze in shock unfortunately.

packrat, my adrenaline was pumping for sure. I was shaking and just felt horrible for DD b/c she was also SO scared. DH felt bad he wasn't with us and seems to know exactly what he would have done. Now, if he was in the situation for reality, who knows what his reaction would have been.

MC, I am usually more paranoid. I think some fear keeps you safe. Clearly, I wasn't scared enough! I really panicked b/c I was already in our neighborhood and could not easily drive to a populated area.

Yssie, The women backed up after she opened the door (though was still screaming at me about her daughter). I wonder if she had reached into the car what my reaction would have been. Maybe that would have triggered my "fight" mode. I probably would have slammed on the gas and booked it.

diamondseeker, I think I did have a false sense of safety b/c I was in my neighborhood but you are exactly right. Funny thing is today I realized I don't KNOW where our police station is! I do know where the fire station is so I guess I should have driven there.

TooPatient, Thanks. I don't think I handled it well but I did what I did naturally. Haha. Like I said, live and learn. We can carry hear and I have never wanted or thought about it until last night. People are crazy.

diamondrng, OMG. That is scary!!! Irrationally the thought crossed my mind I hit her daughter even though I saw nothing, heard nothing, felt nothing. I assume I would KNOW if I hit a body. Just goes to show you how I respond to crazy people...I think crazy too!

Zoe, thanks girl. We are thankfully okay though I may have some slight PTSD

Maisie, She wasn't "in" my car thankfully. I have been replaying it and really wonder if she thought I was someone else (who drives the same kind of car). She kind of jumped back after she opened my door.

Laila, I cannot believe they didn't warn you they were there! I would have freaked too! Then I would have been pissed!

Haven, that is awesome. I was NOT planning on getting out of the car b/c I felt that was the only protection I had!

Danny, doors will be locked from now on! Ironically our other car, an SUV, automatically locks the doors after a min. driving. I was driving the wrong car!

Ame, I can see that! Haha. I don't know if I am comfortable carrying but maybe I should get some mace. Something to consider!

Circe, that is scary! Wow. Thanks. Poor think was SILENT (and she is a talker) during the incident.

luv2, I think I need to be more of a fighter too! I am lame.

thing2, love your takeaways. Haha. You are a tough chick!

Travel, I hate conflict too.

Amber, wow! Good for you.

aviastar, sometimes walking away is better. It is knowing what do to in the situation that is tough!!!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Stacy, how scary! I wonder why he did that and I love YOU apologized to them! I bet drive-thru people have seen LOTS of confrontations though!

 

[NOYFB]

Oh wow, what a scary situation to be in, Tacori! I'm glad you and your DD are ok, and I hope that lady found what she was looking for (dog, daughter?).

To answer your question, I am both. It depends on the situation, I think. When I was 19 I went to a Kmart on my lunch break and noticed a man watching/following me. I didn't think anything of it at the time. When I got out to the parking lot, the man was still following me and asked me for the time. I wasn't wearing a watch and being naive (I was 19, after all), instead of telling him "I don't know", I got into my car, which I was in the process of getting into when he approached me, and turned my key so that I could see the time on my radio display. In doing this, my legs were still outside the car. I had sat down but hadn't pulled my legs into the car yet. When I turned back around to tell the man what time it was, he was kneeling at my car door and his hands were on my leg and he had a creepy smile on his face. My first instinct was to kick/push him away, close the door and get the hell out of there. I remember seeing him grinning smugly as I peeled out of the parking lot. It freaked me out! So, in that instance, I fought (by shoving him) AND fled (by driving away ASAP).

I am not normally a confrontational person, but there have been a few times when I have disregarded my personal safety and have stood up and fought (which, in hind sight, is probably not the best answer, but when I am pi$$ed, I can move mountains! LOL)

Um, I'm not sure if I really answered your question. Sorry.

 

[ame]

Well, being that I carry AND I have mace...she would have been shot OR sprayed in the instant she flung my door open.

I am a fighter, I don't typically run. I've chased armed muggers down before. Didn't say it was the brightest move, but I've done it. I am generally not afraid of most confrontation.

If you don't mind sharing, what holster do you like? I'm still trying to find one that is concealable and comfortable...
.

Would not call this "comfortable" per se, but a Blackhawk is the only one I kept. It's going to depend on what you actually carry and what material you prefer (leather or other)

 

[chemgirl]

Flight for sure!

Years ago I was taking the last bus home after a late night of studying in the library and a creepy drunk man wouldn't stop staring at me. I noticed that he asked the driver to let him know when we got to a pizza place because he was meeting somebody. Well we passed the pizza place and he stayed on the bus. Then we get to my stop and I go out the back door. Next thing I know the creeper sneaks out the front door and loops around so he's between me and my house! He tried to grab my arm and I ran! I ran as fast as I could to a friend's house because I could see them in their front window. Fun night.

I did have my keys between my fingers and planned on getting in a few good punches if he caught up to me.

Mace and firearms are illegal here so unless you have ninja skills I would suggest running.

ETA: The guy did a drunk stagger after me and my friend couldn't stop laughing when he saw who I was running from. Maybe he was drunk and old, but still scary!

 

[Imdanny]

Yes, I think (it's been ten years I've lived in Hawaii on islands other than the City and County of Honolulu) I'd keep my doors locked all the time if I lived on the mainland. I still lock my doors when I see or hear people I think might be on crystalmeth. (it's a huge problem here) because people on it can be violent. In general I'm fortunate because we don't have crime here like where I'm from (Florida).

I'm very much a 'fighter' when it comes to verbal confrontation, debating, people IRL who piss me off. No, there's no question about that. So I guess I'd have to answer your question by saying 'both'.

However I'd like to add I feel strongly the posters in this thread who said you did the right thing for your DD and yourself by not following this person are right. You did do thte right thing by not doing that.

In that situation it's kind of a matter of criminology.

For example when you work in banks, restaurants, or retail they (companies, managers) tell you not to resist if you're being robbed. There's a reason for that. That woman did represent a threat. If you had followed her you would have taken a situation where the danger had passed and would have simply put your DD and yourself in further danger.

I used to live in New Orleans. Let me tell you (this was before Katrina- I don't know what it's like now) the crime was unreal. In fact it had the highest per capita homicide rate in the country when I lived there. And a lot of the crime was never reported on the national news. I could write a whole post about the various crimes that used to happen (and crime was the major reason I left).

One of the things that happened is visitors used to go to the above ground cemetaries. They'd be robbed. I can't tell you how many times a visitor would be robbed, would then chase the robbers, and then would be shot dead.

Someone who acts outside the bounds of regular behavior as to want you to pull over could end up being someone who is capable of trying to kidnap, harm, or kill you. The best thing as what happened with this woman is for them to leave.

 

[TooPatient]

Well, being that I carry AND I have mace...she would have been shot OR sprayed in the instant she flung my door open.

I am a fighter, I don't typically run. I've chased armed muggers down before. Didn't say it was the brightest move, but I've done it. I am generally not afraid of most confrontation.

If you don't mind sharing, what holster do you like? I'm still trying to find one that is concealable and comfortable...
.

Would not call this "comfortable" per se, but a Blackhawk is the only one I kept. It's going to depend on what you actually carry and what material you prefer (leather or other)

Thanks.

I need to look at their options again and maybe order some to try out. I've got one for my Glock, but for my CZ I made the mistake of listening to a few online reviews and bought a different one(bellyband).... I've got the choice of being unable to sit down with it or having a 3rd boob

 

[ame]

HAHA! i don't look like I have a third boob, thankfully.

 

[macycloudy]

that must have been so scary

 

[TristanC]

Definitely fight. But I don't go seeking it. So if it comes to me, and the best option would be to stand ground, it would be fight.

Sometimes things can go really wrong, so the choice to fight would be to buy you time to exit or end a bad situation, not to be a hero. But yes, definitely face the adversity head on first.

Although I would give the mugger my wallet of course, the fight only comes if bodily harm is threatened to people around me