Wedding errrmmm...

[redfaerythinker]

Ok, some advice is needed. I''m going wedding dress shopping on the Eighth and it''s my first time. Annnd, I''m terrified. I''m not delusional about my size, I wear anything from a sixteen to a twenty. But needless to say I fall squarely into the plus size catagory.

Long story short, I was wondering if anyone could tell me what to expect when I go shopping. I just have nightmares of a sales lady looking at me like "there is no way you will ever fit into our gowns, get out of my store!". Silly I know.

So what should I be prepared for, and are there any tips or words of wisdom? Btw i''m going to David''s Bridal because it looked the least scary. But future trips will be in the Atlanta, GA area. Anybody know of any salons that carry plus sizes in-store, in that general area? I am willing to travel a bit. Oh goodness. I will bury my head in a pillow as I hit submit. Eeeek.

 

[neatfreak]

My best friend is also in your size range and I will tell you that she did not call ahead to salons and it was a nightmare. Unfortunately, many places had nothing or just a few dresses in her size and she isn't super comfortable with her size to begin with, so she had some really bad days and more than one crying breakdown as a result. Some places just said when she walked in that they didn't have anything for her to try on, but that they could order her dress for her! (geez thanks, I don't know WHO wants to buy a dress without trying it on first...) and then some places said "oh, we have TONS of things in your size for you to try on!" and they ended up being from the 1980's or they had like 2 dresses.

More than once they tried to jam her into the sample by basically pinning the dress to her front. She wasn't even in it. Very helpful huh?

David's is great, as for other stores I would strongly suggest you call around first and find out what sizes they have most of their samples in. Some stores are certainly better than others at catering to ALL women...

Bridal salons just don't seem to get that all women who are getting married won't fit into a sample size 10 (which is really like what, a 6 IRL?).

 

[diamondfan]

I would make sure they stock the sizes you might need. I am not sure how it works, but many stores carry sample sizes which are small and it is tough to get a true fit idea without the proper size.

Do you have a style in mind, do you tend to like certain types of things? It can help to narrow things down!

 

[Neveah]

David''s is a great start!. They have some gorgeous plus size gowns!

Have you seen their David''s Bridal Woman? Here


Definitely call other salons.... and then inquire how many actual dresses they have in the sizes you''re looking for. So you don''t show up after they tell you "yes" and only have 2!

Just make sure you have an appointment at David''s and be honest about how you feel. Chances are the sales girl will know how you feel from all her experience and can even help you find something you love! It should be a great experience! Let it be!

 

[redfaerythinker]

thanks for the tips guys!

 

[decodelighted]

My 2nd dress was from David''s ... and its the one I actually WORE.

Just looked at the site again and OMG ... they are knocking off the Manolo brooch d''orsay pump. GORGE!!! Check *that* out while you''re at the store too!!! (Only avail in stores)

I''ll say that my designer plus size gown that I ordered to fit me -- didn''t. Just did not have the support required to flatter my figure. David''s however knows what they are doing in that department. The fabrics aren''t AS nice, but the silhouette & structure & cut & everything else was just TOP NOTCH. Well worth the fabric "feel" sacrifice to feel, um, secure.

Good Luck! I''m sure you''ll look beautiful!

 

[redfaerythinker]

Deco, Yes it IS important to feel secure. That''s really good to know. As long as I look and feel good in it that''s all that matters, barring burlap i''m ok with most all fabrics!

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Okay, this is what I did. I am a bit larger than you, but I tried David''s first to get an idea of what types of dresses looked good on me. I almost bought a dress there, but decided to look a bit more. I called one or two salon''s in my area to find out if they carried any plus size samples and they were horridly rude. I did get the "we don''t have those kind of sizes.." response. Which was rude. But then the rest of the salons said they had a size 10 or 12 or so at least one or two I could at least get on and try. You''d be surprised how many 10''s I got on!!! Haha. It was amazing. So, while it won''t be ideal, you can definitely at least get the more ball-gown style dresses on to see how they fit. And one salon, the one I ended up buying my dress at, I do believe it had a few 16s. So call around and find stores that have some sample dresses 10+. You could probably even get some 8s on depending on the style. Worst comes to worst..there''s always hanging the dress around your neck.

Hope this helps some!

 

[gwendolyn]

I''m a plus-size chick as well, Megs, and I''ve had the same concerns you have. Even though I''m not crazy about David''s (I went there for a bridesmaids dress fitting and was treated like I was sub-human by a sales associate because of my size), I *may* end up going there to try dresses on too, simply because it basically sounds like the only place that''s known to have some assortment of dresses in plus sizes. I also considering having a dress made for me--what I''m looking for is not terribly complicated, so I think it might end up being less money in the long run to just have someone make me a dress instead of dealing with the potential heartache of trying on dresses at salons (I''m also bigger than you, so I doubt you would have as hard a time, my dear). I remembered shopping for a prom dress when I was in high school (have always been big, alas and alack) and all the dresses in my size were basically designed for women in their 80''s, so I had a dress made, and it only cost a couple hundred bucks (the same price as many of the dresses we saw that were too small for me) and it was exactly what I wanted in a dress! And I LOVED picking out the fabric! So, that''s another option, possibly.

 

[swimmer]

Hi Red!
I had some awful experiences at shops with my sister who is a size 12. Sales associates made her weep and she is a pretty tough nut to crack. So in the interest of girl power, just a quick google found that there are several stores in Atlanta that specialize in more voluptuous sizes. One Here is a website of online retailers http://www.curvely.com/wedding.html and another store Davids is a great place to start, it does take a bit to get over the, "I'm wearing a white dress!" shock if you are, you know, a black pants kind of gal.

You shouldn't be made to feel anything less than fabulous about getting your dress. Atlanta has some great places out there for you, I hope you enjoy the search for the dress.

 

[Burke]

There is a wonderful bridal shop in downtown Atlanta (Buckhead if you are familiar with Atlanta) called Silver Lining. They only cary dresses size 14 and up in their samples. My sister who is about a size 16 got her gown here, and they were absolutely wonderful. They have beautiful gowns in all price ranges, and it was really nice for her to be able to try on so many different gowns in her size!! Definitely check them out.

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 6/26/2008 7:26:32 AM
Author: Burke
There is a wonderful bridal shop in downtown Atlanta (Buckhead if you are familiar with Atlanta) called Silver Lining. They only cary dresses size 14 and up in their samples. My sister who is about a size 16 got her gown here, and they were absolutely wonderful. They have beautiful gowns in all price ranges, and it was really nice for her to be able to try on so many different gowns in her size!! Definitely check them out.

What a smart store. That''s great Burke. Wish we had one of those in WI for my friend!

 

[redfaerythinker]

Thanks for all the responses ladies. I feel a lot more hopeful now.

 

[rockzilla]

Although I am not a plus size, I can really understand where you''re coming from. A few places I went to only had the RUNWAY samples (yes, whatever godforsaken size that is, its small) in some dresses and since I am small-busted, I was able to squeeze into them, but the whole time I was thinking "I can''t imagine the poor person who is bigger than a 32A fitting into this thing..."

I think a store like David''s or Alfred Angelo with a large selection may be your best bet, at least at first. I''ve seen several David''s dresses that are QUITE lovely posted on here...

 

[marchswallowbird]

I usually wear a size 8 or 6 dress, and the first time I went wedding dress shopping I was shocked that all the dresses that fit me were size 10 or 12. Don't let the numbers get to you. The dress size numbers mean nothing. I don't know how they decide what size a bride should be, but all the designers seem to assume you are 20 years old with a perfectly proportioned body. Bleah to that. It's not you, its the dresses. I am looking for a dress that fits well in the hips and have resigned myself to the fact that my alterations may be more extensive, since I have a small bust, small-to-average waist but larger hips.

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 6/26/2008 9:17:14 AM
Author: neatfreak

Date: 6/26/2008 7:26:32 AM
Author: Burke
There is a wonderful bridal shop in downtown Atlanta (Buckhead if you are familiar with Atlanta) called Silver Lining. They only cary dresses size 14 and up in their samples. My sister who is about a size 16 got her gown here, and they were absolutely wonderful. They have beautiful gowns in all price ranges, and it was really nice for her to be able to try on so many different gowns in her size!! Definitely check them out.

What a smart store. That''s great Burke. Wish we had one of those in WI for my friend!

That sounds like an awesome store! I wish there was one here in my part of New England.

I''m a plus size bride (and also petite), so finding a dress wasn''t fun at first. I went to David''s and while I''m glad to hear that people have had good experiences there, I wasn''t one of them. The woman who was "helping" me looked almost apoligetically at me when I tried on dresses that weren''t right for me. I think she was uncomfortable helping someone who wasn''t the typical size 8 (or whatever) bride.

I went into another store (not a chain) and mentioned my self-consciousness to the girl I met when I walked in. She immediately put my fears to rest, and reassured me that we WOULD find the perfect dress for me. I was thrilled, and jsut hearing her say that made me feel a lot better. I then believed that I COULD look for a pretty wedding dress -- not just settle for something because it happened to be a larger size.

I''m sorry that I don''t know the Atlanta area and I can''t help you more. I wanted to let you know that if you find the right sales associate who HELPS, it really makes the world of difference. Best wishes!

 

[sumbride]

Silver Lining popped into my head too because I remember finding it while researching the same situation. I was actually contemplating flying there to shop. Instead I went home and drove 3 hours to get to Low''s Bridal in Arkansas. It''s not easy to get there, but it''s worth the trip if you are up for it. They have a whole room for each size, up to size 30!!! You won''t try on one or two dresses, but dozens if you want to! And the prices are great!

Here''s the website: Low''s Bridal

 

[brandy_z28]

I''m a street size 14 so I know what you mean! I had really good luck at David''s though their dresses didn''t quite feel right on me, and Alfred Angelo it seems that they stock quite a few of their dresses within certain size ranges. Almost every dress that I wanted to try on from seeing them online was within a size 14-18 range so I could get a good idea of the feel and look.

 

[redfaerythinker]

SarahLovesJS: Yes I too have been able to squeeze into much smaller dresses in my time than I should. My main problem has always been my bootie, so if the dress is bigger down there I can get in it. Teehee.

Gwendolyn: I had thought about going the custom route. The only issue is, how do I go about finding a really good seamstress that I can trust to make me a beautiful dress? And can they do the complicated embroidery that I may want?

Swimmer: Yes I am truly a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal so I''m sure the whole big dress and veil thing will be quite a shock. But hey, i''ve always loved playing dress-up!

Burke: Thanks for the Silver Lining tip. I will definitely go check them out. I love Buckhead, just not the traffic!

 

[redfaerythinker]

I really like Alfred Angelo''s designs and i''m definitely going to go to the one near me. His dresses are so pretty and so my style, and they come in my size! What could be better?

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 6/26/2008 3:55:53 PM
Author: redfaerythinker
Gwendolyn: I had thought about going the custom route. The only issue is, how do I go about finding a really good seamstress that I can trust to make me a beautiful dress? And can they do the complicated embroidery that I may want?

For my prom dress, I just went to my local JoAnn Fabrics and a woman there made it for me. It was a couple of layers of light greyish-blue chiffon on top of a layer of stormy blue silk, so it was relatively simple (no embroidery or beading or anything), so maybe there wasn''t much to mess up, but I was ecstatic with the result. I think for a wedding dress I wouldn''t risk just going to someone random like I did for my prom dress

, but maybe do some research online and ask around for recommendations for seamstresses in your area. If you know of any friends who''ve been pleased with their seamstresses, maybe that''s somewhere to start? Then you could contact them and give them an idea of what you''re looking for (including asking about the embroidery you''d like) and be able to get an approximate price and time frame, I should think. I know I enjoyed the process myself and was really just so pleased with the dress I had made, but if you have something fairly elaborate or particular in mind that you''ve seen in certain dress styles before, then maybe it would make more sense for you to find it in a shop? I definitely think you will be able to get some great ideas about what you like when you go shopping (I''ve heard of Silver Linings before and actually thought about taking a roadtrip down there because it sounded so great!). Definitely let us know how it goes, dahlink! I can''t wait to hear about (and see?) the dress that makes you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.

 

[Elmorton]

I was so scared about this, too, but honestly, it wasn''t so bad!

I tried on my wedding dress as a sample was a size 12 I think...we ordered it in a 26. That was the only part that was really hard for me - when we figured out the size to order and then found out how much more expensive it was (because of extra material), I couldn''t believe it(I''m usually an 18, and my dress was from a Canadian company, plus they run small anyway). I found that part a bit humiliating, but I had a great SA helping me who handled everything SO well - very kind, bubbly, natural - never made me feel like I was a freak for ordering a large size or something. For me, that was the biggest part - finding someone to help us who I liked and trusted. I told her about the wedding and my style, and then she pulled the dresses. She''d been in the industry forever, so she knew what would look good on my body and didn''t try to shove me in anything that truly would be impossible.

When trying on samples, honestly, you''d be surprised how a plus-size body CAN actually fit! Bridal stores have these elastic clamp things so even if a dress won''t zip at all, you can get a great idea of how it looks on you, and it won''t go anywhere. I LOVED trying on dresses with lace-up/corset backs for the same reason - even if most of my back was peeking out, I could see how the dress fit on me from the front and get a really good idea of what the dress would look like in my size. Really, don''t rule out places with samples - I found that I had plenty of stuff to try on.

For strapless/backless bras, most places literally carry every size AND have extenders if one doesn''t fit (I''m very wide around my ribs, but I''m a C cup so the plus-size backless bras were often too big - we had to go with a 38 w/an extender or two). Again though, having an associate I like and trusted at the store helped with this a lot. It could have been uncomfortable, but it was great having someone there who acted like it was completely natural (because it IS!) to need a weird size.

I also recommend only taking friends with you who have shopped with you before and understand how clothes fit you. I was a LOT more comfortable with one friend than I was taking a whole crowd.

It''s true that David''s has plus sized dresses, but I found it really frustrating because when I went (2 years ago), they only carried SOME of their styles in plus sizes in the store. I kept on asking for dresses and would be told that the styles I liked were only available online, and the SAs didn''t want to let me try on a 14 "just to see the dress" - which is really a lot more helpful than you think. I think they''re a lot better now in terms of having an extended line, though. I also found that the service there isn''t really as great as a smaller store because as a chain, I think they tend to have more turnover. It probably varies with every store though.

Anyway, when calling and making appointments, don''t be afraid to ask for someone who has worked there for a long time and who has a lot of experience. Ask other brides for recommendations, too (the SA that helped me also helped my one of my girlfriends who is my exact opposite - incredibly tiny). When your SA is used to working with plus sized brides, you can really avoid a lot of awkwardness.

 

[redfaerythinker]

Thanks Elmorton! I think you''re actually close to my size so that makes me feel pretty good. And I didn''t know about the elastic clamps. I am definitely going to be looking out for the corset back dresses because I LURVE them! So romantic.

 

[pichuchy21]

I went to David''s and was pretty annoyed because they didn''t have a huge selection of plus sizes and all the dresses the sales lady kept showing me made me look like I was 6 months preggo! Which i''m not. I typically wear a 14/16 so what I did was order my dress from David''s online. I love it and it fit well. Good luck with your dress search.

 

[tberube]

Alfred Angelo has a very wide range of sizes, as well...in fact that''s their biggest ad point. Beautiful dresses, too. Good luck!