Does your SO keep you from sleeping well?

[wolftress]

I''m so glad I''m not alone with this problem!

DH not only snores, but also groans in his sleep

It gets so bad that I can hear him from the lounge room when he''s asleep in the bedroom.

I''m a very light sleeper - I wake up when the cats are meowing at the other end of the house, so almost anything disrupts my sleep. Couple that with DH''s problem and some nights, I am so frustrated I stomp into the guest room to sleep.

DH thinks he is only noisy in his sleep when he''s overly tired or feeling unwell, so he''ll volunteer to sleep in the guest room, but I don''t have the heart to tell him he is this noisy almost every night. I can''t remember the last time I had a full night of uninterrupted sleep, which results in mild narcolepsy during the day.

Kenny, I agree about sleep apnoea. I think DH has this condition, but he is too stubborn to see a specialist about it. I will need to keep pushing for him to do this.

 

[iheartscience]

I probably wake him up, actually! I''m a light sleeper and tend to toss and turn getting to sleep. Plus I don''t sleep well when it''s totally dark so I like the hall light on. My husband claims that the light bothers him but he sleeps so soundly that I find that hard to believe.

He snores every now and then and I just push him over and he usually stops.

 

[Gailey]

Date: 9/16/2009 1:45:12 PM
Author: Vancity
I''m a woman, and I never leave the boudoir...

The milli-second that I hear the first snort (or fart when it''s been Mexican night

), his nibs feels the wrath of my elbows of death, and it''s off to the guestroom for him

Vancity I think you are amazing!

I''ve been in the "huffy" bed for 10 years or more. I start off in our bed, but as soon as Mr Gailey goes to sleep he sounds like a fog horn, so I decamp to another room. We do "visit" though!

DF is awful quiet on this thread don''t y''all think? I bet he''s a noisy old goat.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Every night I pick one of the following:

1) Sleeping with a pillow over my head
2) Sleeping on the couch
3) Taking a bit extra bit of Xanax

What works best is all three at once

 

[Amethyste]

Date: 9/16/2009 11:35:11 PM
Author: MC
Every night I pick one of the following:


1) Sleeping with a pillow over my head

2) Sleeping on the couch

3) Taking a bit extra bit of Xanax


What works best is all three at once

1) Sleeping with a pillow over HIS head

 

[vip0802]

YES! oh thank goodness i'm in similar company. for a while, i thought i was the only one!

i'm like junebug17 where if i fall asleep first, i good to go. however if BF falls asleep before i do, i can't. he snores on and off throughout the night so it's just annoying when i'm just about to drift off, and he'll start snoring as if on cue.

either that or he'll abruptly toss around which shakes the whole bed. i so wish we had the money for one of those Tempurpedic or Sleep Number beds, but i'm just grateful that we at least have a queen sized bed. believe it or not we used to share a full-sized bed and he's 6'4!

i sleep with these earplugs and even though they're super comfortable to wear, it doesn't really block out the noise completely. they more or less muffle the sound but it's way better than not using them at all. sometimes his snoring will be especially bad when he's suffering from nasal allergies, and even with earplugs, i'll have to go sleep on the couch. elbowing and trying to wake him up is futile...he's a VERY deep sleeper.

there have been several instances where i was forced to sleep on the couch though. our two cats had hogged my side of the bed (why they both chose my side and not his is beyond me) and i was squished on 1/4 of the bed while BF was sprawled out and snoring away in dream land. after the second time this happened, i moved our alarm right next to his pillow and set the volume to the highest setting.

 

[TooPatient]

Certainly not alone. Some nights I''m sure I''ll be thrown off the bed. Usually he just snores and rolls around. Some nights get interesting. He is somehow able to float up to the ceiling, turn over, and fall back down hard enough that the cats bounce off the bed. I don''t know how he sleeps through it.

I never thought I''d sleep again. It took time, but I''ve adjusted to his snoring. And his rolling. And his blanket pulling.

KING size bed helps. We bought a foam topper for the bed too. Bed Bath & Beyond had a nice one for just a few hundred dollars. (and we got it on sale + a 20% off coupon!!!)
And an extra blanket so when he takes them all I can stay warm too. (of course he denies pulling them and beleives that he never sleeps under blankets because he gets too warm)

 

[TooPatient]

Did I mention I can''t sleep with the room too cold & he can''t sleep if it is too warm?

I can''t sleep with any light & the cat can''t see in the dark.


Now that I think of it, the cat sleeping between us at night has helped. She is 18 years old so he doesn''t want to hurt her. And if he moves too much, she sticks her claws into his side.
And if his arm/leg goes anywhere near me she grabs it.

 

[tyty333]

Date: 9/16/2009 11:41:23 PM
Author: Amethyste

Date: 9/16/2009 11:35:11 PM
Author: MC
Every night I pick one of the following:


1) Sleeping with a pillow over my head

2) Sleeping on the couch

3) Taking a bit extra bit of Xanax


What works best is all three at once

1) Sleeping with a pillow over HIS head

With or without added pressure?

 

[gemgirl]

Date: 9/16/2009 9:25:44 AM
Author: Amethyste
The only time that my husband wakes me up is when he turns around in his sleep and his arm ends up in my face or if his legs are in my space.
So I retaliate with stealing all the covers so he''s naked and i know eventually he will wake up shivering...

My husband does snore like a lumber jack but it doesn''t wake me up. It will keep me up if I happen to get up to go to the bathroom. He makes it hard for me to fall back to sleep.

What I''ve had to deal with for the last sixteen years is my 6''3" husband throwing his arms and legs around when he turns. I usually end up getting smacked on the forehead with the back of his hand, and once I got punched in the nose. He also likes to sleep half on me and my pillows and I always wonder how he doesn''t feel the lump (me) he''s sleeping on.

 

[April20]

I have no first hand advice, but I have a friend that has this issue and I think you should take a note from her play book!

Her husband is a HORRIBLE snorer. I mean horrible. It wakes her up and then she cannot go back to sleep. It got so bad recently that she got up, made the couch up and then woke HIM up and told him she''d make up the couch. Looked at him rather hopefully and then he got up to go sleep out there. It worked for her, maybe it will work for you! I think part of her frustration is that she knows his snoring is directly attributed to his weight. 5 lbs less and he doesn''t snore. Every time he starts snoring again, she knows he''s gained it back and to the couch he goes.

 

[Tuckins1]

Last night DH slept on the couch because his stomach was bothering him and he didn''t want to keep me up again... It was so nice! (I feel bad for saying that

) I got to sleep really early and I slept all night long.

PS- we do have a king size bed. If we go anywhere and it''s a queen (or god forbid a full)we absolutely cannot sleep at all!!!!

 

[Little Monster]

I guess I should be really grateful that I actually sleep BETTER when my BF is home. We both work rotating night/day schedules so we both get nights to sleep alone, but I end up sleeping through the night with no bad dreams when he''s there. Without him, it takes me a really long time to fall asleep & toss & turn. Somehow he makes me feel much safer & relaxed. Just another thing I love him for!

 

[Amethyste]

Date: 9/17/2009 3:01:08 PM
Author: gemgirl

Date: 9/16/2009 9:25:44 AM

Author: Amethyste

The only time that my husband wakes me up is when he turns around in his sleep and his arm ends up in my face or if his legs are in my space.

So I retaliate with stealing all the covers so he''s naked and i know eventually he will wake up shivering...

My husband does snore like a lumber jack but it doesn''t wake me up. It will keep me up if I happen to get up to go to the bathroom. He makes it hard for me to fall back to sleep.


What I''ve had to deal with for the last sixteen years is my 6''3'' husband throwing his arms and legs around when he turns. I usually end up getting smacked on the forehead with the back of his hand, and once I got punched in the nose. He also likes to sleep half on me and my pillows and I always wonder how he doesn''t feel the lump (me) he''s sleeping on.

omg!! you got me laughing pretty hard here *snort*

 

[blingergrrrl]

Ugh! My SO and I are both shift workers so we are BOTH bad sleepers and he snores and I move a lot - so we keep each other up at times. Usually the one who has trouble sleeping is the one who gets up and sleeps on the couch, or the one who has to wake up the earliest gets the bed (and the alarm clock). We are both thinking of investing in eye masks for sleeping in the daytime, and he likes to have a fan going for white noise - which bugged me at first but now I'm used to it. He works 10hr shifts and I work 12s, which rotate from days to nights so we are never going to bed or waking up at the exact same time. It's just a fact of life that we are constantly waking each other up, or not sleeping together at all due to working opposite shifts. We also only have a double mattress so we are wanting to buy a nice Latex Queen mattress in the near future since he calls me a bed hog.

We are also rennovating the other bedroom upstairs so once that is done we might just sleep in seperate rooms at times. I do know of a couple of couples (lol) that sleep separately and they swear it saved their marriages!

ETA: AND we have 2 kitties that love to cuddle throughout the night - some times to our annoyance.

 

[blingergrrrl]

Date: 9/17/2009 2:19:13 PM
Author: TooPatient
Certainly not alone. Some nights I''m sure I''ll be thrown off the bed. Usually he just snores and rolls around. Some nights get interesting. He is somehow able to float up to the ceiling, turn over, and fall back down hard enough that the cats bounce off the bed. I don''t know how he sleeps through it.

LMAO!

 

[elrohwen]

I can be a horrible sleeper in strange places, but in my own bed I''m pretty good no matter what FI does. I am, however, a light sleeper in the morning from about 4am on. Unfortunately, this is the time that FI tends to make noise (grunting/groaning), go to the bathroom, roll over onto my pillow, etc. And if I wake up with less than 30 min til my alarm, I can''t sleep again. On the weekends I can wake up and fall back asleep, but knowing I need to get up soon makes me anxious and unable to fall back asleep. So if FI wakes up before me on a work day, I''m screwed and can''t go back to sleep.

Unfortunately for him I''m a horrible teeth grinder and hate to wear my mouth guard

Very occasionally he''ll wake me up and make me put it in, but otherwise he sleeps through it well. I know it''s loud enough that my mom, who sleeps with a horrible snorer, can''t stand the grinding. I should wear the darn thing anyway though just because it''s good for my teeth, but it''s uncomfortable.

 

[Tuckins1]

Date: 9/18/2009 5:40:01 PM
Author: elrohwen
I can be a horrible sleeper in strange places, but in my own bed I''m pretty good no matter what FI does. I am, however, a light sleeper in the morning from about 4am on. Unfortunately, this is the time that FI tends to make noise (grunting/groaning), go to the bathroom, roll over onto my pillow, etc. And if I wake up with less than 30 min til my alarm, I can''t sleep again. On the weekends I can wake up and fall back asleep, but knowing I need to get up soon makes me anxious and unable to fall back asleep. So if FI wakes up before me on a work day, I''m screwed and can''t go back to sleep.


Unfortunately for him I''m a horrible teeth grinder and hate to wear my mouth guard

Very occasionally he''ll wake me up and make me put it in, but otherwise he sleeps through it well. I know it''s loud enough that my mom, who sleeps with a horrible snorer, can''t stand the grinding. I should wear the darn thing anyway though just because it''s good for my teeth, but it''s uncomfortable.

I have the same problem- I''m an anxious sleeper. On the weekend, or over the summer, I can sleep no matter what. I don''t have anything important to do in the morning, and I don''t have to be up at the butt crack of dawn... If DH wakes me up after 2:30 or 3, I can''t really get back to sleep.

 

[Luckyeshe]

Date: 9/17/2009 2:22:47 PM
Author: TooPatient
Did I mention I can''t sleep with the room too cold & he can''t sleep if it is too warm?

I can''t sleep with any light & the cat can''t see in the dark.


Now that I think of it, the cat sleeping between us at night has helped. She is 18 years old so he doesn''t want to hurt her. And if he moves too much, she sticks her claws into his side.
And if his arm/leg goes anywhere near me she grabs it.

LMAO! Can I borrow your cat?! That just might work for me!!

 

[Londongirl1]

Date: 9/16/2009 2:56:54 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
I just heard about this on the radio. They claim that couples who sleep alone have better sleep than those who sleep in the same bedroom. I totally believe this. I am a light sleeper so I wake up if he snores, talks in his sleep, grinds is teeth (luckily rarely), gets up to go to the bathroom, comes to bed later or wakes up earlier than me...it is exhausting sometimes. If I really need my sleep he will sleep in the guest room.

I saw a feature about this on Breakfast TV here in the UK 2 weeks ago. The doctor/pyschologist (or whoever he was) said that men and woman were never designed to sleep together all night - just enough to ''you know what''. At first I thought this was ridiculous but then I thought...maybe he''s right?. My SO snores occasionally and it drives me nuts because if he wakes me up I CANNOT get back to sleep while he lays there dead to the world

 

[mochi]

Yes...my DH keeps wakes me up often during the night.

Not only does he snore (he has sleep apnea), he walks in his sleep. I have caught him going out the back door in the middle of the night in his underware. When I asked him what he''s doing, he said he had to tinkle. I waited until he got outside and turned the yard light on so he can see what he''s doing

.

 

[Tuckins1]

Date: 9/19/2009 1:09:04 PM
Author: Londongirl1

Date: 9/16/2009 2:56:54 PM

Author: Tacori E-ring

I just heard about this on the radio. They claim that couples who sleep alone have better sleep than those who sleep in the same bedroom. I totally believe this. I am a light sleeper so I wake up if he snores, talks in his sleep, grinds is teeth (luckily rarely), gets up to go to the bathroom, comes to bed later or wakes up earlier than me...it is exhausting sometimes. If I really need my sleep he will sleep in the guest room.

I saw a feature about this on Breakfast TV here in the UK 2 weeks ago. The doctor/pyschologist (or whoever he was) said that men and woman were never designed to sleep together all night - just enough to ''you know what''. At first I thought this was ridiculous but then I thought...maybe he''s right?. My SO snores occasionally and it drives me nuts because if he wakes me up I CANNOT get back to sleep while he lays there dead to the world

DH absolutely will not have us sleeping in separate bed rooms. He feels that at that point, we should just get a divorce because that''s a big part of being married... I sort of agree, but I NEED MY SLEEP!!!

 

[phoenixgirl]

My DH used to snore too. Then he quit smoking and got in shape. I always figured it was the quitting smoking that cured him, but all the stories about weight loss make me wonder if it could have been a combination of the two.

I would just move his head to a different position if he were snoring. That usually stopped it, at least temporarily. If it didn't work, I'd nudge/elbow until he changed positions more drastically. He never woke up from this.

We also sleep with white noise. I tried to wean myself from it since our baby is due in a month, but the darn neighbors with their stupid dog, and the train, and the trickle of the toilet . . . these all keep me awake. I'm just a light sleeper. So we're using the white noise now while we still can. I'll be sleep deprived either way once the baby comes!

Oh, and my husband can wake me up because he's too lovey-dovey. Not in an adult way, just in that he always wants to whisper sweet nothings and wake me up to snuggle in the morning and say goodbye to me a million times if he's getting up first. At least in my crazed, sleep-deprived pregnant state, he has been breaking himself of this habit and consoling himself by talking about how angelic I looked while asleep and how he just wanted me to sleep as long as I could. He's really such a sweet man, and the poor guy probably deserves a wife who isn't secretly annoyed that she has to pause every time she walks past him for a hug. I'm like, let me just get to the bathroom already . . .

I know, I know, I don't deserve him. And whatever issues we have with keeping each other up at night (flipping around with my Snoogle pregnancy pillow and peeing every two hours doesn't help), I'd still be really sad and lonely to sleep by myself. We talked about sleeping separatley for the end of my pregnancy but we just couldn't do it.

 

[phoenixgirl]

Darn karma. DH went to bed early and is snoring away like a champ. That's what I get for going on and on about my husband's miraculous recovery from snoring! Time to go move his head . . .

 

[marcy]

We are a horrible combination. DH is very tall and we have a queen sized bed so I get crowded out a lot. He tosses and turns, get phone calls from work in the middle of the night, etc. I am a very light sleeper so every time he moves I wake up. Sometimes one of us just gets up and moves to another bedroom.

 

[violet3]

Oh, i believe that the opposite of the question is true in my house. My SO snores REALLY loudly, but i am the one who is difficult to sleep with i am pretty sure. In fact, we used to have a queen sized bed, and i''ve never been so happy as when we got a King size. Actually SO was never so happy. I am a terrible sleeper, and have always been. I am VERY restless - i snore sometimes, I toss and turn all the time, and as a result i steal the covers from anyone else nearby.

My sister never liked to sleep next to me when we were little - i don''t blame her, although she''s no peach to sleep with either. She once kicked me like a soccer ball in the middle of the night while we were sleeping over at our grandparents

. I think it''s a family trait.

SO and I have resorted to using separate blankets - he sleeps with our lightweight King sized comforter/bedspread and i use an old queen sized quilt that i can roll around in and wrap myself up in as much as i want. I am sure I disrupt SO''s sleep sometimes still, but the larger bed has really helped us because we now have our own space.

 

[pixley]

Hubby got bumped from the bedroom shortly after the DD was born and has since adapted to sleeping in the lower suite. He is a total night owl and cannot go to sleep without reading in bed. I am sensitive to light and had a miserable time falling back to sleep after he jammed on his reading light, so separate beds it is. We kept it a dirty little secret, but now that we're out about it, I know there are friends of ours who secretly wish they could do the same.

The only problem is when guests come over, he has to bunk back with me and it's very disruptive.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Actually we are both at fault. When I was wiritng my thesis, I would get up frequently in the night to jot down ideas, and I felt bad waking up the DH in the meantime. So I jsut slept in the other room. We both suffer from insomnia and he is a total bed hog, so I have just kept my own room and we both sleep a lot better. Double the laundry, tho!!

cheers--Sharon

 

[charbie]

FI has a deviated septum, so he can''t breathe very well when he''s sleeping. he uses breathe right strips (talk about SEXY) but even that doesn''t help. i sleep like a rock, but i feel awful for him because he really does wake up every few hours either to pee or move around. he even takes detrol to control the pee problem...which we laugh about now bc he''s a 28 yr old male taking a pill that advertises to middle-aged women (yes, i know this forum has a lot of middle-aged women...but its funny that FI has to take a pill directed towards them)...

 

[luv2sparkle]

Hubby doesnt snore all that much but does get up a lot. After 5 kids I will forever be a light sleeper, so he does wake me up. Funny thing, I dont usually snore,
but one night I snorted and woke myself up! I sat up in bed and looked at him to see if he heard me. He didn''t move a muscle so I thought Whew! and went back
to sleep. I realized if I sleep with my hand under my face, I snore. How weird is that!