Wedding Does anybody know about the presents for parents thing?

[MaggieB]

Hi all, I was reading through a wedding planning checklist and one of the items was "purchase gifts for parents." Why am I purchasing a gift for my parents? I mean, I''m happy to buy them gifts but what is the protocol here? Is this a thank-you for paying for the wedding? We are paying for the entire wedding ourselves, so is it weird if we give a gift anyway? When do we do it?

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

I don''t think it''s a formal thing like you''re expected to, but a lot of people do gift their parents with something small like a photo frame (for a picture of their choosing). Usually the gifts are handed out at the rehersal dinner when the bridal party gifts are handed out.

 

[MaggieB]

Thanks! I don''t have a bridal party or a rehearsal dinner either, so maybe I''ll just skip it. We have a welcome party but it is for everyone and there are no gifts being given out during.

 

[jewelerman]

A small gift of appreciation for paying for the wedding is a tradition but not expected.It would be nice to give each set of parents a token of appreciation for their support at the wedding.A frame for a wedding photo is very nice...also something made of sterling for longterm personal use is a nice gesture if there is extra funds to do so.

 

[julesbeth]

We are getting my parents a cute Kate Spade frame Well, that is the plan at least - I guess it depends on our funds.

 

[Haven]

I imagine it''s nice to give your parents a token of affection for raising you to be the happy people that you are, which allowed you to find love and embark on a successful marriage. I don''t think it''s to "repay" your parents for paying for your wedding.

My parents did pay for our wedding, so we gave them a week-long vacation of their choice.

 

[marchswallowbird]

Maggie, I''m not doing gifts for my parents. FI and I are paying for the wedding ourselves. I''ll have one of our wedding photos framed for each parent afterwards (they''re divorced) but I really don''t see the point to giving them a gift at the wedding. Really, I don''t feel there''s anything to "thank" them for. I''ve supported myself all thru college and beyond; my dad even said no when I asked for help a few years ago to purchase a townhome.

 

[MaggieB]

Hmmm . . . the more responses I get to this, the more I think that this particular tradition doesn''t really apply in a wedding like ours, which is virtually just family and a few very close friends. We are paying for this trip for our parents, treating them to multiple events during the week, a wine cruise, spa day, fishing charter, etc. I (clearly) have no problem getting stuff for the parents, I was just trying to figure out if there was some point during the wedding festivities that I was supposed to give them a "present."

I think that since I don''t have a rehearsal dinner or a bridal party that I am gifting, I''m not going to actually have that moment. The week is really going to be our present to them. Thanks everybody!