Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond industry

[suchende]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

"Honey, would you ever wear diamonds?"
"Nope."
"Why?"
"I am a man."
"So you think men don't wear diamonds?"
"Mhmm."

i guess the issue is settled at my house. i think it's probably cultural/regional though.

 

[CharmyPoo]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I see no impact.

I would like to convince my fiance to wear a diamond or two but it is just not his thing. I do have male friends who love diamonds.

 

[monarch64]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Wow! I had no idea that diamonds were gender-specific or that anyone ever questioned them! Great topic!

My last boss wore a 3 carat RB set in a gold wedding band. His wife alternated several diamond solitaires, the smallest of which might have been one carat. The boss's wedding band looked ( to me) to have been about 2 carats or RB's. He really liked to wear diamonds. He also had a vault (about 12x12) of guns and knives. He had 3 sons. He was completely heterosexual.

He LOVED diamonds, and actually considered buying my old engagement ring (1.5 RB set in plat--I eventually sold it on ebay through my brother's account).

His wife was DRIPPING in diamonds from her hands to her ears to her wrists to her toes...

I've never thought that diamonds had a gender or a sexual orientation! I have no good answer for this thread!

 

[that_someone_special]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Um, I can't imagine all 15 male (regular) posters on here hurt the industry

I don't care for diamonds on guys--- like small ones that have a few 2-3 pointers ok, but 3 carat diamonds on guys- especially when worn on the pinky finger freaks me out. Don't know why.

But who freaking cares! Everyone should just wear the diamonds they like. Just like how people say "Oh I'd never wear anything over 1 carat how gaudy" and some say "Anything less than 2 carats- are you nuts? " So what!

 

[charbie]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I think it is generational, personal, and cultural preference.

To be perefectly honest, I think this question is begging for controversy and you want someone to say, "yup! Diamonds are for gay men, my husband thinks if he wore them, people would think he's gay!" But come on kenny, do you really think that's true? I understand as a gay man, you are subject to a lot more criticism than ill ever face as a straight female, but as we are both trying to crush barriors for gay people, bringing up a question like this really seems like its taking a step back.

Maybe it is just where im from, maybe its just that my generation seems to be moving in the right direction when it comes to gay rights and stereotypes to think that a few gay men posting anonymously on a forum will make men think, "gee, gay men where diamonds, so I wont." I know plently of gay men who could care less about diamonds as well.

 

[Haven]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I don't see how anyone who loves diamonds could hurt the diamond industry. (I know lots of straight men who wear diamonds.) As others have said, it depends on the individual. People who don't want to wear diamonds probably never will want to wear them. People who always wore diamonds will continue to wear them.

I agree with Madam Bijoux. I don't think it could hurt, but I don't think it will really change anyone's opinion about wearing diamonds, either.

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I think it's a legit question.
Thanks to those who responded in a respectful way.
Thanks for every opinion.
I'm not addicted to people agreeing with me.

If people don't like the thread, or me, they could pass on the thread.
I don't go in threads to take potshots at people I don't like.

Calling my question asinine is insulting.
It demonstrates intolerance for diversity.
Respecting diversity is not just about what's genetic, like race or gender.
I strive to respect what's in people's minds too.
If we all did that here we'd have a better community.

I speak up because the only thing I cannot tolerate is intolerance.
I will point it out when I see it.

asinine adjective
an asinine stunt stupid, foolish, brainless, mindless, senseless, idiotic, imbecilic, ridiculous, ludicrous, absurd, nonsensical, fatuous, silly, inane, witless, empty-headed; informal halfwitted, dimwitted, dumb, moronic. See note at stupid . antonym intelligent, sensible.

 

[Haven]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny--Would you have been insulted if Holly responded with:
"I think that is a silly question"?
or
"I think that is a foolish question"?

Was it her choice of words that offended you, or the assertion that this question is really not worth asking?

I'm really curious, I'm not just trying to stir the pot. I've seen many posts by you that preach intolerance of intolerance, but I must say that I sometimes find them confusing because they are (sometimes) in response to posts that seemed productive to me. SO, this particular example has me wondering what, in particular, you find offensive about Holly's post.

I am not challenging the fact that you are offended by it, that seems obvious and perfectly understandable. I'm trying to understand your particular definition of *the wrong kind of intolerance.* I think that will help me understand the lessons you like to include in response to posts that offend your sensibilities, and I'm truly curious.

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny--Would you have been insulted if Holly responded with:
"I think that is a silly question"?
or
"I think that is a foolish question"?

Was it her choice of words that offended you, or the assertion that this question is really not worth asking?

I'm really curious, I'm not just trying to stir the pot. I've seen many posts by you that preach intolerance of intolerance, but I must say that I sometimes find them confusing because they are (sometimes) in response to posts that seemed productive to me. SO, this particular example has me wondering what, in particular, you find offensive about Holly's post.

I am not challenging the fact that you are offended by it, that seems obvious and perfectly understandable. I'm trying to understand your particular definition of *the wrong kind of intolerance.* I think that will help me understand the lessons you like to include in response to posts that offend your sensibilities, and I'm truly curious.

Thanks Haven for responding in a polite way.
Yes, silly is not as insulting as asinine.
Silly is listed as one of the synonyms but look at all of them.
Dictionary.com states asinine means stupid, foolish, brainless, mindless, senseless, idiotic, imbecilic, ridiculous, ludicrous, absurd, nonsensical, fatuous, silly, inane, witless, empty-headed; informal halfwitted, dimwitted, dumb, moronic

Also as you put it, "the assertion that this question is really not worth asking" is intolerance.

All the time I get skewered for asking questions that are gender related.
Why?
I think women get it and know first hand what it's like to suffer at the hands of society's and men's unfair treatment of women.
Conversations with you all have opened my eyes on this.

There is a tendency to think if we don't personally see the prejudice then it's not there and women are just whining about gender discrimination, or Kenny's just winning about gay discrimination.

If a woman started a gender discrimination thread here and I posted that the question was asinine I'd get lynched FAST!
Why the difference?
Intolerance of diversity.

 

[ksinger]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny--Would you have been insulted if Holly responded with:
"I think that is a silly question"?
or
"I think that is a foolish question"?

Was it her choice of words that offended you, or the assertion that this question is really not worth asking?

I'm really curious, I'm not just trying to stir the pot. I've seen many posts by you that preach intolerance of intolerance, but I must say that I sometimes find them confusing because they are (sometimes) in response to posts that seemed productive to me. SO, this particular example has me wondering what, in particular, you find offensive about Holly's post.

I am not challenging the fact that you are offended by it, that seems obvious and perfectly understandable. I'm trying to understand your particular definition of *the wrong kind of intolerance.* I think that will help me understand the lessons you like to include in response to posts that offend your sensibilities, and I'm truly curious.

You beat me to it. I want an explanation of how one gets from comment (choice of words aside) about a question, to being intolerant of diversity.

Kenny, you do come across as a one-note Johnny at times. And it seems that anyone who says anything that upsets you is immediately and reflexively labeled "intolerant of diversity" in your world. You say you aren't addicted to agreement with your positions, but you are quick to lob blanket accusations when someone dares.

My understanding of the word tolerance is just that - I TOLERATE something. I might, but do not necessarily HAVE to, agree or sympathize with it, think it's OK, or that it is good for the individual or society. I TOLERATE it.

Everything comes with a price, too much conformity AND too much diversity both have a cost.

 

[waterlilly]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

"Honey, would you ever wear diamonds?"
"Nope."
"Why?"
"I am a man."
"So you think men don't wear diamonds?"
"Mhmm."

i guess the issue is settled at my house. i think it's probably cultural/regional though.

Pretty much the same conversation I had in my house...

"men don't wear diamonds" ... me- why? "they just don't. we don't wear high-heels, we don't wear pearl necklaces, and we don't wear diamond rings.....unless you are like a rock star or something..."

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny--Would you have been insulted if Holly responded with:
"I think that is a silly question"?
or
"I think that is a foolish question"?

Was it her choice of words that offended you, or the assertion that this question is really not worth asking?

I'm really curious, I'm not just trying to stir the pot. I've seen many posts by you that preach intolerance of intolerance, but I must say that I sometimes find them confusing because they are (sometimes) in response to posts that seemed productive to me. SO, this particular example has me wondering what, in particular, you find offensive about Holly's post.

I am not challenging the fact that you are offended by it, that seems obvious and perfectly understandable. I'm trying to understand your particular definition of *the wrong kind of intolerance.* I think that will help me understand the lessons you like to include in response to posts that offend your sensibilities, and I'm truly curious.

You beat me to it. I want an explanation of how one gets from comment (choice of words aside) about a question, to being intolerant of diversity.

Kenny, you do come across as a one-note Johnny at times. And it seems that anyone who says anything that upsets you is immediately and reflexively labeled "intolerant of diversity" in your world. You say you aren't addicted to agreement with your positions, but you are quick to lob blanket accusations when someone dares.

My understanding of the word tolerance is just that - I TOLERATE something. I might, but do not necessarily HAVE to, agree or sympathize with it, think it's OK, or that it is good for the individual or society. I TOLERATE it.

Everything comes with a price, too much conformity AND too much diversity both have a cost.

All you had to do was say, No Kenny, gay men posting about their diamonds does affect the industry's sales to straight men.

Calling the question asinine is intolerant.

 

[charbie]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

See, this what i was talking about. Its like you were sitting there, waiting for someone to say something so you could make this about the PS comminuty being "intolerant" yet again.

This question was loaded and you know it. If you want to pretend it was innocent, be my guest, but this is not the first time you've made a post like this.

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

See, this what i was talking about. Its like you were sitting there, waiting for someone to say something so you could make this about the PS comminuty being "intolerant" yet again.

This question was loaded and you know it. If you want to pretend it was innocent, be my guest, but this is not the first time you've made a post like this.

...and it won't be the last.
But NO this thread was not baiting on my part.
If you see it and me in that light I can't help that.

Tolerating diversity is something I struggle with too.
It is fascinating how often we are intolerant once you find out what to look for.

I'm no better than anyone.
It's not the PS community.
It's every human on the planet.

 

[charbie]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

See, this what i was talking about. Its like you were sitting there, waiting for someone to say something so you could make this about the PS comminuty being "intolerant" yet again.

This question was loaded and you know it. If you want to pretend it was innocent, be my guest, but this is not the first time you've made a post like this.

...and it won't be the last.
But NO this thread was not baiting on my part.
If you see it and me in that light I can't help that.

Tolerating diversity is something I struggle with too.
It is fascinating how often we are intolerant once you find out what to look for.

I'm no better than anyone.
It's not the PS community.
It's every human on the planet.

I really hope you are not insinuating that I don't tolerate diversity.
THAT would be insulting, and in no way could I see how any of my posts mean I am intolerant of diversity. Im not going to let myself get drawn into a kenny vs. Everyone drama fight. And then you make it ok by saying, "oh, its ok that you don't appreciate people different from you. I'm the same way," and I call that a bunch of crap. You can self deprecate all you want. But don't draw others into it.

And don't start a thread like this if you don't want to have an intelligent conversation on the matter without insulting other people.

 

[sillyberry]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

"Honey, would you ever wear diamonds?"
"Nope."
"Why?"
"I am a man."
"So you think men don't wear diamonds?"
"Mhmm."

i guess the issue is settled at my house. i think it's probably cultural/regional though.

Pretty much the same conversation I had in my house...

"men don't wear diamonds" ... me- why? "they just don't. we don't wear high-heels, we don't wear pearl necklaces, and we don't wear diamond rings.....unless you are like a rock star or something..."

Yep. Which suits me just fine in my little bubble.

And I still have zero idea why saying it is an asinine question is intolerant. Rude, perhaps, but I don't see intolerance.

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I'm not saying anything about you personally ,Charbie.

I'm addressing a larger issue that is just the human condition.

I'm not insulting anyone any more than I would be if I pointed out that breathing air is a selfish thing or everyone's poop stinks.
It just is.

 

[Haven]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny--Thank you for answering my question and not taking offense to it. I was worried you may do the latter.

I appreciate your response, and it really explained something about a key difference in the way you and I view responses to questions. (Which, of course, is OKAY. It's just a very interesting difference to me and it really helps me understand where your intolerant of intolerance posts are coming from.)
--> I do not think that it is intolerant if someone asserts that a question is not worth asking. Especially if it is MY question, I find that kind of feedback to be really interesting. I'm likely to disagree with it, of course, since I ASKED the question in the first place, but if others find a question of mine to be ridiculous or silly or asinine, I would want to know why. I value the critical thinking that is involved when one questions the validity of an assertion or question, and if that assertion or question is MINE, I think the whole thing would lead me to new understandings about the question itself, as well as the way others see it.
--> I now understand that you find it to be intolerance for someone to assert that a question of yours is not worth asking. This is something I didn't understand before, because I just don't plain see it that way. And I thank you for enlightening me.

I would like to challenge you to try to look at such responses from a different perspective for at least a bit before you label them intolerant. Maybe take a moment to consider why someone might find your question asinine, and engage in a discussion with her about her underlying assumptions/understanding of the issue that led to that assertion. This is where I think you may find that the response doesn't really come from a place of intolerance, rather it comes from a place where the accepted "facts" are just very different from your own. (I make this challenge in the spirit of community, and not in the spirit of fighting, by the way. I like your posts and I like reading everyone's responses to them. I think they are all very telling.)

In the spirit of full disclosure, I think it is always best to question the question, and I challenge my students to do this on a regular basis. This is probably why a response such as Holly's wouldn't bother me in the least, and it just highlights a key difference in the way we approach discourse.

 

[Matata]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Calling the question asinine is intolerant.

You're correct. BUT, there's a difference between the uses of "intolerance" and the phrase "intolerance of diversity" when applied to actions that do not impact civil rights and their use when they confer damage that impacts civil rights. The difference being that one use is freedom of expression and the other permits, if other proofs of discrimination are met, that legal action be taken.

IMHO (as a former affirmative action officer who dealt with the legal ramifications of these words at the state attorney general level), when we use these words for mundane discussion, they lose their emotional power. I believe the overuse of these words in mundane discussions makes those who are normally tolerant and advocates of diversity less emotionally responsive to the legal ramifications of the words.

An example is the difference in emotional reaction a crowd of people would have if I walked up to a black person and yelled "Hey you N-word" versus if I yelled, "Hey you nigger."

The intolerance (or diversity of ideas) about who impacts the diamond industry is not the same the intolerance (or diversity of ideas) that denies civil rights.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny, frankly, I find that to be a perfectly asinine question.

I don't think this is an asinine question as much as a problematic thread which will negatively impact this website. Once you bring stuff like this up, the idea of intollerance will come to the minds of men who just wanted to come here and buy a diamond. Now suddenly all this baggage is brought up and some may second guess their decision.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Actually when I think of men wearing diamonds I think of rappers. I am sure they are very helpful for the economy and the diamond industry.

I read that 67.5% of men wearing diamonds are affiliated with the maffia, 17.9% are in the music industry, 2.5% are gay, and the rest are straight men.

 

[Haven]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Actually when I think of men wearing diamonds I think of rappers. I am sure they are very helpful for the economy and the diamond industry.

I read that 67.5% of men wearing diamonds are affiliated with the maffia, 17.9% are in the music industry, 2.5% are gay, and the rest are straight men.

Now you're starting to sound like Dancing Fire, MC!

 

[soberguy]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I am certain that my being a gay gemstone nut does NOT hurt, but HELPS the gemstone industry. I am friends with 99.9% straight guys here in NM, and they really like seeing my new gems They also come to me when they are looking for something for their wives, and MANY times for themselves. The guys here especially like my turquoise matched with yellow gold. So, in short, I think my buying, sharing and wearing gemstones brings more interest... And my knowledge brings smarter people to jewelry stores where they can raise questions to local jewelers that have never been raised before... treatments, certification, etc.

And forgive me... but I lean toward agreement with Holly

If you search for insults, disagreements, and intolerance... you will find it EVERYWHERE... This question is BEGGING for a negative response... I live in a world where being gay is supposed to be completely unacceptable... and yet I have NEVER had a problem... Joking about my sexuality is how the guys deal with it... If I took offense to everything they said I'd be one lonely person.

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I appreciate all the replies on the main topic and the subtopic of tolerance.

I'm listening, and grateful for the feedback.
I think difficulty is a side effect of progress.

 

[VRBeauty]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

All you had to do was say, No Kenny, gay men posting about their diamonds does affect the industry's sales to straight men.

Calling the question asinine is intolerant.

Kenny - since I seconded Holly's post, I'd like to explain why I did that.

First, since asinine seems to carry some baggage... can I substitute ludicrous for the purposes of this discussion?

To me the ludicrous part of the question you posted is that a handful of people posting on pricescope could influence something as large as the diamond industry in any way. Yes, pricescope is a popular forum, but the number of people who even think to stop by here is a very, very small portion of the people who might consider buying a diamond. Add to that the fact that 1) there aren't that many openly gay men posting here, and 2) most people who read your posts in Rocky Talk, or show me the bling, which is where people tend to go when they're weighing diamond purchases have no idea that you're gay - that discussion tends to take place here, in hangout.

That's all... I also tried to answer, honestly, the larger question of whether gay men generally sporting diamonds influences the industry. But that's not the question you actually posted - do gay men here help or hurt the diamond industry.

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Thanks VR.

 

[ksinger]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny--Would you have been insulted if Holly responded with:
"I think that is a silly question"?
or
"I think that is a foolish question"?

Was it her choice of words that offended you, or the assertion that this question is really not worth asking?

I'm really curious, I'm not just trying to stir the pot. I've seen many posts by you that preach intolerance of intolerance, but I must say that I sometimes find them confusing because they are (sometimes) in response to posts that seemed productive to me. SO, this particular example has me wondering what, in particular, you find offensive about Holly's post.

I am not challenging the fact that you are offended by it, that seems obvious and perfectly understandable. I'm trying to understand your particular definition of *the wrong kind of intolerance.* I think that will help me understand the lessons you like to include in response to posts that offend your sensibilities, and I'm truly curious.

You beat me to it. I want an explanation of how one gets from comment (choice of words aside) about a question, to being intolerant of diversity.

Kenny, you do come across as a one-note Johnny at times. And it seems that anyone who says anything that upsets you is immediately and reflexively labeled "intolerant of diversity" in your world. You say you aren't addicted to agreement with your positions, but you are quick to lob blanket accusations when someone dares.

My understanding of the word tolerance is just that - I TOLERATE something. I might, but do not necessarily HAVE to, agree or sympathize with it, think it's OK, or that it is good for the individual or society. I TOLERATE it.

Everything comes with a price, too much conformity AND too much diversity both have a cost.

All you had to do was say, No Kenny, gay men posting about their diamonds does affect the industry's sales to straight men.

Calling the question asinine is intolerant.

See "one-note Johhny" comment above.

 

[AGBF]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

I appreciate all the replies on the main topic and the subtopic of tolerance.

I'm listening, and grateful for the feedback.

Well...as I said in another thread, I don't really know you, Kenny, but you may be the kind of man who can understand how women feel. As I said then, in order to do that a man has to listen to women, not just argue with them. Kudos to you for listening!!!

PS-And you don't have to remind you that you don't care what I think of you because you don't care what anyone else's opinion is. I felt like volunteering it anyway.

Deb


Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend

 

[kenny]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Thanks Deb.

I like you.
You have four notes, A, G, B, and F.
I, apparently, have only one.

 

[zhuzhu]

Re: Do you think gay men here help or hurt the diamond indus

Kenny,
Why are you so intolerant of Holly's opinion of your question?
You said "I don't go in threads to take potshots at people I don't like.", that is good for you, but why are you so intolerant of people who do? Unless this is your private blog space, doesn't everyone have a right to respond to a open question, regardless of how the response sounds?
I don't get it. Regardless of how "nice" her choice of words comes across, does she not have the right to express her opinions on something that is posted on a PUBLIC forum because what she said insulted your?
If you TRULY thinks her statement represents "intolerance of diversity", then I fear you perhaps never really know what real world discrimination and intolerance are about.
Instead of calling those who find your question distasteful "intolerant people", wouldn't it be easier to just say that you don't appreciate them hurting your feelings? Leave things FACTUAL without inflammatory accusation is the way to go. Unless you are in the autopilot mode to continue seeking this kind of conversations.