Wedding Destination Wedding Gift?

[philly317]

I am attending a destination wedding next month and I''m conflicted on the gift. Should I give the same amount as I would a non-destination wedding or is it acceptable to give less because you spend so much to just get there?

 

[Sabine]

I would spend whatever you feel comfortable with. It probably depends on how far away the wedding is/how much it is costing you, but if you are spending a significant amount on travel, I would say it''s fine to spend less. I think with most really far destination weddings, the bride and groom are so happy that people are coming that they don''t expect much in ways of gifts.

 

[neatfreak]

As with any gift, you should give what you can afford and feel comfortable with. You shouldn''t feel obligated to give ANYTHING more than you can afford.

 

[AlliMay]

I am having a destination wedding and definitely do not expect ANY gift from those joining us in Mexico. Just by attending you are giving the couple a very nice gift...that being said, if you are close to the couple I understand wanting to give them something. How much you spend is up to you based on your relationship with them and what you want to give.

 

[marchswallowbird]

I agree completely with AlliMay. I am having a destination wedding and am specifically asking for no gifts. I would rather people put their $$ into being able to pay for travel to attend. Really, you are never obligated to provide a gift, I don''t care what the etiquette books say. Give a nice card, unless you can afford a gift and the travel costs.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

We do but probably b/c those we choose to attend are good friends. I always give them cash/card before or after though. I am so afraid I will lose it or they will.

 

[musey]

My wedding is not technically a "destination" wedding, since it's where I live, but it's out-of-town by plane flight for 90% of our invitees.

I would like to think that none would give more than they are comfortable, which would logically adjust based upon how much they're spending to get there (unless they're rollin' in it). I've tried to make it very clear to our 20-something friends that are flying in that their efforts to get here are more than gift enough for us, and we wouldn't ask or expect more from them. They're spending a lot more on their travel expenses than most people ever spend on wedding gifts.

What this couple expects, no one can guess, but my personal opinion is that yes, it's perfectly okay to spend less (or nothing) if the travel PLUS gift would otherwise be a financial strain. If you're just giving less on principle, that's your own prerogative.

 

[pjean]

I''m also having a destination wedding, and I''m hoping people take us seriously when we say no gifts, just come. Particularly our friends - I don''t want to strain anyone''s budgets, and flights are expensive these days.

If you feel you want to do something more elaborate than getting a card, why not include a photo of you and the bride or groom (or bride and groom, if you''re friends with both)?