prettylnpink419
Shiny_Rock
- Joined
- Oct 17, 2008
- Messages
- 165
Okay, so I''m mostly a lurker but I''m about to pull my hair out and need some help. I was the post yesterday about bringing a new cat into the house and how your other cat will react.
Well....let''s see...about 3 years (yes-3 years!) ago I took in a stray right before it snowed to make sure she''d be okay. She''s been with me ever since. Her name is Sadie. She was 2nd to my first cat, Sullivan (male). Both are fixed. Sullie is about 5.5 years old now and Sadie is about 2-3 (not sure exactly of age).
Sadie is FIV+ (Feline AIDS) so at first I kept them separated until I could decide what to do. I''ve grown very attached to her and she has to me as well. She was staying in a spare bedroom but I eventually moved her into my bedroom full-time. It took her awhile to get used to my dog (who sleeps with me at night) but she has eventually accepted her and now we all snuggle.
Obviously, Sadie and Sullie have had plenty of time to sniff each other through the door, etc. After lots of research and discussing with my vet, I''ve decided to socialize Sullie and Sadie. She is so bored in my bedroom and for my own sanity because she is pretty agressive for attention when I am in my room and wants to be involved in everything. I''ve moved twice in the last 2 years...this last time taking Sadie a week early so she could have the run of condo without Sullie stressing her out. She started peeing in my kitchen sink and a couple of times actually pooped on my kitchen counter....very disturbing. Once Sullie came over, that was it...back in the bedroom because she howls and screams at him. I have seen him chase her and I guess he is trying to attack her? I''m not sure what he really wants with her...maybe even just to sniff her? But she freaks out and gets very aggressive and vocal. I''m not too worried about them scratching one another because it will be difficult for her to spread FIV without actual intercourse but I''m worried about them hurting one another. I want to take the cowards way out and just open the doors and leave for awhile but what happens if one of them really gets hurt? They won''t kill each other will they? Usually Sullie will chase Sadie under the bed and they will have a stand-off...a very loud one. Sullie is silent but Sadie is screaming.
Last night I brought Sadie out to the living room and everytime they''d react to each other (Sadie would start getting vocal and Sullie would creep up on her) I would alternate turns and put one of them in my carry crate so they were both safe but could still see each other.
I''ve socialized Sullie with 3 other cats previously (former roommates). Two males and a female (not all at 1 time). With the first male they were best friends, with the 2nd male they just kind of went their separate ways, and with the female he chased her around a bit and drove her kind of batty but eventually they got over it. It was livable because she wasn''t very vocal. With Sadie, it is impossible to even really hear over her growling and howling.
Are there anti-anxiety meds or anything like that that might help this transition? I don''t need them to be best friends but I really just want to be able to leave my bedroom door open and have them quietly co-habitate. If not, I may need to try to rehome Sadie, even though I love her and named her after my deceased Grandmother. Plus rehoming an FIV+ cat will be extremely difficult.
Any suggestions/tips/advice would be greatly appreciated! I know I need patience and that it''ll take time but there has to be something else I can try to help ease the struggle, I don''t want 2 extremely stressed out cats!
Thanks in advance and if you''ve read this whole thing....thank you thank you thank you! I know I''ve been rambling.
Well....let''s see...about 3 years (yes-3 years!) ago I took in a stray right before it snowed to make sure she''d be okay. She''s been with me ever since. Her name is Sadie. She was 2nd to my first cat, Sullivan (male). Both are fixed. Sullie is about 5.5 years old now and Sadie is about 2-3 (not sure exactly of age).
Sadie is FIV+ (Feline AIDS) so at first I kept them separated until I could decide what to do. I''ve grown very attached to her and she has to me as well. She was staying in a spare bedroom but I eventually moved her into my bedroom full-time. It took her awhile to get used to my dog (who sleeps with me at night) but she has eventually accepted her and now we all snuggle.
Obviously, Sadie and Sullie have had plenty of time to sniff each other through the door, etc. After lots of research and discussing with my vet, I''ve decided to socialize Sullie and Sadie. She is so bored in my bedroom and for my own sanity because she is pretty agressive for attention when I am in my room and wants to be involved in everything. I''ve moved twice in the last 2 years...this last time taking Sadie a week early so she could have the run of condo without Sullie stressing her out. She started peeing in my kitchen sink and a couple of times actually pooped on my kitchen counter....very disturbing. Once Sullie came over, that was it...back in the bedroom because she howls and screams at him. I have seen him chase her and I guess he is trying to attack her? I''m not sure what he really wants with her...maybe even just to sniff her? But she freaks out and gets very aggressive and vocal. I''m not too worried about them scratching one another because it will be difficult for her to spread FIV without actual intercourse but I''m worried about them hurting one another. I want to take the cowards way out and just open the doors and leave for awhile but what happens if one of them really gets hurt? They won''t kill each other will they? Usually Sullie will chase Sadie under the bed and they will have a stand-off...a very loud one. Sullie is silent but Sadie is screaming.
Last night I brought Sadie out to the living room and everytime they''d react to each other (Sadie would start getting vocal and Sullie would creep up on her) I would alternate turns and put one of them in my carry crate so they were both safe but could still see each other.
I''ve socialized Sullie with 3 other cats previously (former roommates). Two males and a female (not all at 1 time). With the first male they were best friends, with the 2nd male they just kind of went their separate ways, and with the female he chased her around a bit and drove her kind of batty but eventually they got over it. It was livable because she wasn''t very vocal. With Sadie, it is impossible to even really hear over her growling and howling.
Are there anti-anxiety meds or anything like that that might help this transition? I don''t need them to be best friends but I really just want to be able to leave my bedroom door open and have them quietly co-habitate. If not, I may need to try to rehome Sadie, even though I love her and named her after my deceased Grandmother. Plus rehoming an FIV+ cat will be extremely difficult.
Any suggestions/tips/advice would be greatly appreciated! I know I need patience and that it''ll take time but there has to be something else I can try to help ease the struggle, I don''t want 2 extremely stressed out cats!
Thanks in advance and if you''ve read this whole thing....thank you thank you thank you! I know I''ve been rambling.
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