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cat-related Q - what would you do?

Phoenix

Phoenix

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Oct 5, 2006
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9,975
So we visited these people's place (I shan't say whose) and saw and heard some things about their cat which really made my blood boil! :angryfire:

Their beautiful cat is kept out of the main area of the apartment and is kept at the back, ie. store-room, washing/ laundry area and guess this, next to the aircon compressors (which blow out hot air when the AC is on, which is most of the time in this hot country)! We were told that that was because the cat had been peeing on their bed. I was told by the woman of the house about 6 months ago about the peeing problem and asked her then to take the cat to the vet and obviously this hasn't happened. They don't even own a cat cage/ carrier which means that the cat has not had a check-up for the last two years since they moved to this country. I was very shocked and blurted out that they shouldn't keep the poor cat next to the aircon compressors and this woman just gave me a "black face" (meaning she was p*ssed at my comment) and said they had no choice because of the peeing problem. So I repeated that they should take the cat to the vet just in case there's a urinary tract infection or something, but whatever it was it needed to be attended to and not ignored and the cat banished to the back area!!

Furthermore, I stroked the cat and noticed she was emanciated. I could feel the bones on her back and her ribcage!! Our cat, for example, in comparison though not fat is certainly not bony, not like this poor cat is. When I was at the back stroking the cat, I noticed there was only dry food and no wet food. I checked with them and it was confirmed that the cat had only been given dry food her entire life (7 years!!).

I am beyond livid!! :angryfire: :angryfire: This woman was visibly upset but I don't care! I am concerned about the cat. I don't know what to do or say to them now though to help the cat. My DH wants to help too, but this couple, or rather the guy, is "very close" to us (and that's all I will say), though in truth I've been tolerating her more than anything else (but at the same time trying my hardest to be nice and civilised for harmony's sake). Just as an aside but to illustrate the point, she told us when we visited a few weeks ago that she "was planning to employ a full-time maid but decided not to, because [her] MIL was coming to stay [with them]!" - quote, unquote!!

WWYD? Any advice would be very much appreciated.
 
Call your local SPCA or Humane Society. At least you can ask them for advice, but you can also ask them to make a visit. They will not tell who called. I did that with neighbors whose horses were not well looked after -- when the neighbors asked if I'd reported them, I lied & said no "but others were also concerned about their horses." (True.) I'll bet the same is true of these friends; they won't know who did it & your relationship can continue -- if you want to be friends with people who treat animals so heartlessly. That cat's life is as important to her as yours is to you or mine to me. It's in pain & possibly will die, long and slowly. There comes a point where we all must decide where we stand on basic issues. How will you feel if you don't do anything & they eventually tell you the cat died?
 
To be honest, I'm not sure what you can do, other than possibly contacting the local humane society or similar organization for help if you think this cat is being neglected.

I do agree with you that if he/she is peeing everywhere, a vet should probably take a look in case the cat has a UTI. Maybe look for a vet that does house calls if the owners won't take the cat to the vet's office?

I don't see how feeding a cat only dry food is harmful to his/her health. Wet food has more calories I believe, so maybe you could suggest that the owners give the cat wet food to help with weight gain.
 
That sounds like horrid conditions to keep any animal in! Is the cat at least receiving water? My guess is a UTI or crystals in the urine. It's got to be in pain. Are you in the far east? Is there a humane society / SPCA organization there? Call - even city hall or bylaw or what ever department you can think f to start the ball rolling. Any chance you could just take the poor thing yourself in your cat carrier to your vet? Would your DH have any influence over his friend?

I feel bad for the cat but also for you- you are kind of between a rock and a hard place, with this one. Hope you one back with good news.
 
I would take the cat and get her the care and love she needs. These aren't people I would care to maintain a relationship with after seeing how they treat animals, so I wouldn't think twice about severing any ties to them.

I'm not joking.
 
I'd tell them I found a good home for the cat and I'd take it. Clearly they are not attached to it. I'd vet it and try to find it a home.
 
lulu|1346604407|3261308 said:
I'd tell them I found a good home for the cat and I'd take it. Clearly they are not attached to it. I'd vet it and try to find it a home.
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I second Lulu's and Haven's suggestions. That poor baby. And I think after I rescued her cat, that would be the last this woman would ever see of me. I firmly believe in the idea that you can judge a person's character best by the way he or she treats an animal. Reading this made me livid.
 
I agree with the others that you need to either take the cat yourself, or contact authorities like the Humane Society that we have here if they have something equivalent there.

I will say, as someone else already mentioned, that there is nothing wrong with only giving a cat dry food though. If the cat is emaciated, it's because it doesn't have enough food period, but many many cats, including my own, have only had dry food. I tried giving my cat wet food a few times but he won't touch the stuff. No harm no foul in that regard.
 
Haven|1346602288|3261296 said:
I would take the cat and get her the care and love she needs. These aren't people I would care to maintain a relationship with after seeing how they treat animals, so I wouldn't think twice about severing any ties to them.

I'm not joking.
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This times 100. Seriously! Take your carrier over there and go get her.
 
ANy updates Phoenix? I hope you are able to intervene in some way - not to put pressure on you! - but that cat clearly has no one looking out for its safety, health or best interests. There was an add long, long, LONG ago on TV for the humane society, in the city I grew up in, and its tag line was "We speak for those who can not speak for themselves". That has always stuck with me (and that was 40+ years ago!)

What would be the worst case scenario if you did take the cat and get it some help? Would they never speak to you again (and, really, is that such a loss?? :roll: ) but there could be social/financial/business ramifications, so maybe you can't do that... we here on PS don't know the situation as well as you do, but what about reporting to an agency? That cat has nothing and no way of getting out of there. Could there be others who have been to the home and have seen the cat? That way, you won't be the obvious target of who made the call.

Only you know what you are comfortable and able to do, but I sure hope the best for that poor thing - what a horrible way to exist. It needs help and medical attention --- and a new loving home!
 
Thank you, everyone, for your advice. I've read every post and I have to say I agree with you all, wholeheartedly.

My first instinct was to call the SPCA, but I shall save that as a last resort. I've been asking myself, can we sever relationship with these people (the guy is family)? I am a bit reluctant but it is NOT out of the Q, because like Mrs Jam has said and this is my belief too, a person's real character is shown by how they behave towards animals; and this woman is certainly showing her true colours, and that's putting it mildy. But there will for sure be intervention. DH is supposed to play tennis with the guy tomorrow at their condo. He's going to go up to their place to check on the cat again. I've asked DH to tell the guy that we're gonna offer to take their cat to the vet for a check-up "if they're too busy too do it". We'll also offer to take their cat in "to give them a break". Once the cat is with us, no way are we going to give her back to them!!

I'd never forgive myself if this poor cat died, as a result of their mis-treatment. I am already blaming myself for not having followed up with the woman when she first brought up the weeing problem. I guess I just thought that she'd follow my advice and take the cat to the vet, cuz we have lots of cat lover friends and they all take excellent care of their cats.

RE the food, please correct me if I am wrong, but we've read that dry food is too de-hydrating for cats and they don't contain enough real animal protein and were advised by cat friends that a diet comprising of dry+ wet food is preferable. Moreover, the dry food that these people feed this poor cat looks like the cheap horrible stuff, which is a different subject altogether. What's also worrying is that either they're not feeding enough food to the cat and/ or she's is too sick to eat properly.

Thank you again. I shall be back with an update.
 
I also wanna add that even if the end result is that we do sever relationship with this people, I am not going to cry over it! Seriously!

The worst scenario I fear is that if we push these people too hard, then they stop talking to us and don't let us come to their place to take the cat away. Then for sure, other measures like calling the SPCA would have to be employed. I am worried that the SPCA here is not empowered like the SPCA in the UK. We're considering other measures too like asking my dad to help. He's like the patriarch of the family.

I will not rest until this is resolved. Big heart-felt thanks from DH and myself to everyone who's written in with strong powerful messages.
 
:halo: Wonderful news Phoenix! So glad that you are both such loving people that you are willing to go that extra mile for this poor helpless animal. This speaks VOLUMES as to the kind of people you are - bless you both for getting involved. Lots do not.... :halo:
 
Huge pat on the back for you & DH from me too, Phoenix! I understand your fear they will get annoyed & cut you off before you can save the cat -- but love the idea of getting your father involved if necessary & hope that will help if it's needed. I know you'll keep at it until it's solved & I do agree that how people treat animals reveals a lot about their characters -- at least all I ever need to know!

Always puzzling that the poor care some folks give their animals shows their disinterest in them, yet they declare they love them & refuse to give 'em to someone who wants them. Guess it's an ego thing, tragic. And dumb.

--- Laurie
 
You are awesome! I think your plan of approach sounds like a good one. I'm willing to bet they'll take you up on your offer. I think some people think they are doing a good deed when they simpy provide an animal with the bare minimum of food and shelter. They don't realize - or really care - that domesticated animals need love, attention, and lots and lots of nurturing and time with their human family. My husband and I take our responsibility toward our dog and cat children very seriously, and we have some friends (and a mother-in-law) who probably think we're nuts, but that's simply the way it is.

As far as dry food goes, I can only speak from my experience with our two cats, both of whom are on a dry food diet. They both eat a food that is specialized for their gastrointestinal issues, and while the food is available in both wet and dry formulas, they will only eat the dry. I was so surprised when they would not eat the wet food; it actually smelled kind of good (in a gross way!) to me, but they would not go for it! Our vet said that the dry is actually good for their teeth and that we were lucky they'll eat the dry food.

I'm wishing you the best of luck with your soon-to-be-kitty! Hopefully it goes smoothly with minimal familial fallout!
 
I understand what you are going thru. The poor poor cat. Something does have to be done! Hopefully you and DH can talk some sense into these people. But sometimes, even tho it seems like they don't care about the animal, they refuse to give it up! I have a very sad story about DH's friend's dog. She had a huge lump on her backside and I kept asking his friend to take her to the vet because it's getting bigger. He never did and I even offered to pick her up and take her to the vet and even pay for allll of her medical bills if it means she will get the proper care. He refused. She died a few months later. And I really wish I would have just snatched her up as taken her... It still pains me to think about her. So something has to be done for this cat!!! I don't understand people. Why get an animal of you are not going to care for it! Its the same as a child, at least in my eyes. Would you stick your child in the laundry room because he or she keep peeing on the bed?
 
I have an update! DH has talked with the guy and he's agreed that we can take the cat to the vet on Saturday for a check-up. I don't expect the vet to give her a clean bill of health but at least it's a start. DH also asked the guy to buy better more nutritious food for her and to feed her more often as well as to watch to see if she doesn't eat properly.

Enerchi, sorry I didn't answer your Q earlier. There's a water bowl for her next to her food.

This is obviously on our mind and we desperately want to take her in and care for her ourselves, but we're going to take it one step at a time. We don't want to drive them away and lose any chance of being able to care for her.

Hopefully, we'll have more/ better news soon.

Thank you so much again, everyone.
 
Phoenix, great first step! Here's what I'd consider doing in that situation: when you give them the diagnosis, make it seem as costly as possible to cure -- and to maintain health. I'd even, ahem, exaggerate if necessary. These do not sound like people who will be willing to drop a lot of money in vet bills.

Keep at it -- as I'm sure you know, no matter what they promise, they will not change how they manage the cat's eating or diet. Folks who don't care initially don't suddenly get religion. She'll be back in the same shape if she goes home with them.

You're a great girl!

--- Laurie
 
Yay! Phoenix! We need more people like you in this world fighting for animals!
 
YayTacori|1346874092|3262755 said:
Yay! Phoenix! We need more people like you in this world fighting for animals!
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:appl: :appl: I agree!

I like JewelFreak's approach--exaggerate her needs, and get the kitty in your care so you can give her what she really needs.

I'm so happy you're taking action. We had a similar situation with my BIL, and we waited too long to do something about it, and the poor animal ended up dead. We couldn't have foreseen what happened, but from now on our approach is to get the animal out of there ASAP, no matter what. I still want to curl up in a ball and cry the night away just thinking about our inaction.
 
Great job Phoenix!!! :appl: :appl: :appl:
So happy they are letting you take her to the vet!

My dh and I rescued one of our cats that way. Tommy was a mouser in the basement of the building I work in and kept in dismal conditions with too little food and no light etc and after weeks of sweet talking the superintendent he finally agreed to let me take him to the vet to get him checked out and long story short we ended up keeping him.

Good luck- I hope that the kitty is OK and that it all turns out well!!!!
 
FANTASTIC!! that is wonderful progress - yippee!

But I wonder if by exaggerating the cats medical condition, instead of inspiring them to give the cat to you or someone else to care for, would they decide to .... um... euthanize instead?? That would scare me.
 
Enerchi|1346879598|3262821 said:
FANTASTIC!! that is wonderful progress - yippee!

But I wonder if by exaggerating the cats medical condition, instead of inspiring them to give the cat to you or someone else to care for, would they decide to .... um... euthanize instead?? That would scare me.
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It's costly to euthanize a cat, my guess is they would be happy to hand her off to Phoenix if they planned to euth her.

Many pets end up homeless and in the "care" of the local ACC because owners are too cheap to give them the end-of-life they deserve, so they surrender them and let some stranger give them a shot to the heart (or worse, a gas chamber death) instead. :nono: These are always the saddest cases to see, the "euth requests" that come in. Breaks my heart. ;(
 
^^^^

Oh, I hope that's the case then - they are too cheap to do that horrible unspeakable... "thing"...!! The image that I've created of this couple, is one that is probably unfair to them. I hope Phoenix (or someone as loving as her) can keep the cat and it never has to return to them again.

Fingers crossed they say their goodbyes when Phoenix or DH picks up that poor kitty!
 
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