Can''t breathe

[Gypsy]

Thank you star!


Kaleigh... lol. I''m glad to have options too. Yahoo HotJobs is really easy to use by the way. I recommend it for the ease. I applied for 5 jobs. Will keep looking, and am considering submitting my resume to a recruiter/head hunter too. I think that would be a good idea... get my name and resume out there. A new boss would be great. Really great.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 4/21/2008 5:43:24 PM
Author: neatfreak
You can come take a vacation in Wisconsin.

Nothing but farmer''s markets and beer on the terrace (linky). Very low stress. Doesn''t that sound like FUN???

And you are welcome anytime. We have a spare bedroom!

It sounds wonderful honey. Thank you for the offer. How close are you to the Mayo clinic in Minnesotta, BTW? LOL. Mom is seriously considering going there for her next surgery.

 

[AmberGretchen]

Oh honey - I''m just now seeing this post. Fingers and toes and everything else crossed BIG TIME for your job search, either with that company or outside of it. I KNOW you are worth SO MUCH MORE than this - please please please try to remember what a SMART, SWEET, GIVING, GORGEOUS woman you are, and that you deserve (and will get!) something better. SOON.

Its just not fair that you''re dealing with this at all, but I''m really proud of you for taking action to get yourself out of the situation.

I''m here for you if you think it might help - you know how to reach me. Anytime. Seriously.

Lots and lots of good thoughts.

 

[miraclesrule]

Gypsy, I am so feeling your pain. And it''s especially hard in a company that doesn''t recognize the women''s deep insecurity. I think you will have the last laugh. Really I do.

I was so beside myself because of my new boss too, that I think I became paranoid and crazy. I finally had a reading from a friend (I know that sounds crazy, but she was cheaper than an executive coach.) I found it very enpowering and the guidance she gave me was spot on. She was also able to help provide insight into the reasons behind the machiavellian style of my boss. I won''t even call her a leader. A leader to me in someone who inspires and makes you want to do your very best. I know I work for "The Devil who wears I.N.C.", but it''s probably because her home life is whack.

I think she may self-destruct within a few months, but if you don''t think that is the case with your boss, perhaps the answer is a new job. Whatever happens, trust that the universe will guide you to exactly where you need to be. I am not going to stick my neck out or even try to get the situation to change, because it won''t. Not until someone sees her true colors and reins her in. But I know how hard it is to be subjected to that type of abuse of power on a regular basis and not have a toxic effect on you. We are all pulling for you. Be Just and Fear Not!! I have a lot of connections in the legal field, if you ever wish to share what type of law you have the most passion for pursuing. A Zen bowl works too. I just hit mine in the office and breath until it calms me...or I kick the blow up clown that bounces back to me so I can hit it again. It build muscle and tone and relieves stress all in one punch.

 

[phoenixgirl]

Gypsy,

Best of luck today and in every step along the way! You are doing the right thing; some people are just toxic nutsos who for whatever reason (usually eating alive anyone who gets in their way) have advanced up the corporate ladder. Her life is miserable so she wants to make everyone else''s too, but no job is worth being miserable over! Leave her and her misery to rot in her office as person after person leaves or transfers to another department. Good riddance to bad karma!

 

[lovelylulu]

gypsy,

i have my fingers crossed that a new job will work out. your situation sounds awful and it''s clearly taken too much of a toll already. there are great jobs with great bosses and if all else fails apparently there''ll still be wisconsin''s beer terraces

 

[LitigatorChick]

Gypsy - I am worried about you. No one deserves to be treated that way! Your boss''s conduct sounds absolutely unacceptable. Get out, girl!

 

[Catmom]

Oh Gypsy, I hope that today is a much better day for you and the department switch can pan out!! No one should be treated like you have been treated. Please be careful with the stress and your health and I''m sending my most positive thoughts that you are able to get out from under your current boss as quickly as possible [and yeah, I like the pins in the boss doll idea!!]!! Please remember that you have an entire group of wonderful people supporting you.

 

[miraclesrule]

Sending all the Goddess power your way today Gypsy!!

 

[bee*]

Delighted to hear that you''ve applied for jobs. You will get something and you need to get away from that woman! I can''t believe that her boss lets her treat you like that. Best of luck with your meeting. I''ll keep my fingers crossed that they allow you to transfer.

 

[dragonfly411]

Gypsy, I was in a similar situation a few years ago. My boss was breathing down our necks. We got in trouble if we smiled or laughed with one another. It takes a toll on your health and well being. Good luck finding a job, I think that is the best option. Please keep us updated.

 

[Gypsy]

Thank you all for the continued support. I just found out that the E-VP sought out my boss last night at this function they attended (I left early, you can imagine why). So I''m really really nervous now. My meeting with him is at 2:30. Keeping my fingers crossed, and trying to figh back another panic attack.

I applied for jobs. There are jobs out there. I can find another. I can do it. I know I can. It''s going to be okay. Please please God... let this all be okay.

Okay... I''ve got a little bit of a grip.

 

[Stephanie]

There are jobs out there for you! A wonderful, less-stress job is just waiting for you. Is there a way to report her behavior to an HR person anonymously? Or would it just make matters worse. I know that this isn''t the first time you''ve had such problems. But one day this will all end.

 

[luckystar112]

Hey gypsy, I don''t know what time it is where you are, but I hope your meeting went well!

 

[Gypsy]

Meeting went. Not sure if it went well or badly. I don''t think he''s inclined to take on more direct reports than he already has.
Said a couple of encouraging things, and a couple of discouraging. We''ll see. Overall, I don''t think he''s that inclined to help me out. Despite the fact that he thinks I''m doing a "great job"... because he mentioned that I could use him as a reference if I decided to look around. Not encouraging at all.

 

[brooklyngirl]

Gypsy,

I'm so, so sorry you're going through this. Every time you post about his woman I get sick to my stomach. I know she is your boss, but why don't you call her on her b.s? She keeps threatening to fire you over what? A headache, sickness, family emergency? Stand up to her, and if she fires you, well, LUCKY YOU! I bet you could sue the pants off that company for harassment and wrongful termination (and probably a whole slew of other things). I am not the lawyer here, but is there really no recourse at all?

If there is any way at all that you can live off your savings for a few months while you recouperate and find another job, please, please, please get out of there. It is not worth it. You're wasting your health for this psycho b*tch.

The abuse you're taking from this woman on a daily basis is just beyond me. What would you (or anyone else on this forum) advise their sister or best friend if they saw she as with a man who treats her like your boss treats you?

Sending prayers and good wishes your way. I hope that psycho b* gets what's coming to her.

 

[marcy]

Gypsy, I am so sorry to hear your are working for such a difficult boss. Good luck finding something new and you certainly need to as soon as possible. Take care and don''t let that evil boss get to you. She''s NOT worth it. Hugs to you.

 

[Gypsy]

I think I''m going to report her to HR. At least, its something I''m considering. I''ll have to see.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 4/23/2008 12:01:25 AM
Author: Gypsy
I think I''m going to report her to HR. At least, its something I''m considering. I''ll have to see.

If you do, make it as detailed as possible. I''m sure all the crap she has pulled is fresh in your mind. Before you go to bed, make bullet points. A through z...

One door closes, another one opens....

And IF you leave I hope that door smacks her hard in her A**.

 

[monarch64]

Sorry dear, I haven''t made it all the way through this thread, but NO ONE should have to be subjected to such a stressful environment and CLEARLY it''s being caused not by you, but by her. I would definitely consider reporting her. I hope you are able to find a new job soon, or that things improve with your current one. Big hugs to you, I feel so bad that you''re dealing with this.

 

[akw94]

Gypsy, congrats on getting out some applications. Sometimes it''s hard to take action even when in a difficult situation so I think it''s great you''re taking steps. Sorry the meeting today didn''t go as well as you hoped. I don''t know much about your situation there but it sounds like reporting her to HR is a step and getting out of that job is the best thing you can do asap.
Good luck and I hope your situation improves soon!

 

[Gypsy]

Okay so I spoke to a co-worker who used to work at HR here, and she advised me against going to them said that unlike other companies our HR department is very focused on protecting the management.

BUT... I GOT A CALL FOR A TELEPHONE INTERVIEW TODAY AT LUNCH! If the telephone interview goes well, then an in person interview! It''s at a good company, and I''m excited. Crossing my fingers HARD.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 4/23/2008 4:16:43 PM
Author: Gypsy
Okay so I spoke to a co-worker who used to work at HR here, and she advised me against going to them said that unlike other companies our HR department is very focused on protecting the management.

BUT... I GOT A CALL FOR A TELEPHONE INTERVIEW TODAY AT LUNCH! If the telephone interview goes well, then an in person interview! It''s at a good company, and I''m excited. Crossing my fingers HARD.

I am glad your coworker told you that because I had that exact thought in my mind (usually company''s are that way for some reason which is sad). Sending you good vibes on the ineterview!!!! Hope you find something soon!

 

[Gypsy]

I''m glad she told me too. I''m keeping it underwraps for now. Thank you Skippy!

The company is much smaller than the one I work for with only 500 employees, and it''s in a competitive consumer market environment (tech), it''s revenue is only about 300 million a year, but that''s not necessarily a bad thing. So we''ll see.

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 4/23/2008 12:12:33 AM
Author: Kaleigh

Date: 4/23/2008 12:01:25 AM
Author: Gypsy
I think I''m going to report her to HR. At least, its something I''m considering. I''ll have to see.

If you do, make it as detailed as possible. I''m sure all the crap she has pulled is fresh in your mind. Before you go to bed, make bullet points. A through z...

One door closes, another one opens....

And IF you leave I hope that door smacks her hard in her A**.

Ditto EVERY word, Gypsy I just wanted to give you my support

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 4/23/2008 4:50:12 PM
Author: Lorelei

Date: 4/23/2008 12:12:33 AM
Author: Kaleigh

Date: 4/23/2008 12:01:25 AM
Author: Gypsy
I think I''m going to report her to HR. At least, its something I''m considering. I''ll have to see.

If you do, make it as detailed as possible. I''m sure all the crap she has pulled is fresh in your mind. Before you go to bed, make bullet points. A through z...

One door closes, another one opens....

And IF you leave I hope that door smacks her hard in her A**.

Ditto EVERY word, Gypsy I just wanted to give you my support

Thank you ALL for your support. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

 

[icekid]

Date: 4/23/2008 4:16:43 PM
Author: Gypsy
Okay so I spoke to a co-worker who used to work at HR here, and she advised me against going to them said that unlike other companies our HR department is very focused on protecting the management.

BUT... I GOT A CALL FOR A TELEPHONE INTERVIEW TODAY AT LUNCH! If the telephone interview goes well, then an in person interview! It''s at a good company, and I''m excited. Crossing my fingers HARD.

YAY!! Focus on getting out of there, and not on that mean mean woman. You''ll be gone before you know it.

 

[Pandora II]

I think it''s time to leave.

You are already being affected physically by this situation and that will get worse unless you get away from the situation.

I had a similar situation last year, I didn''t listen to my GP who warned me I was getting burnt out and would snap eventually. In the end, I ended up a month later sitting in his office bawling my eyes out for 45 minutes (appointments here are only 10 minutes, so I felt even worse that I was taking up so much of his time).

At the end of the appointment he handed me a piece of paper and told me I had two options - I could take 3 weeks off work or he would section me for my own safety. As far as he was concerned I was having a complete breakdown and needed time off to do nothing. I took the weeks off (and felt guilty about missing work every day) and when I went back to see him before going back to work he had fixed me an appointment with my new psychiatrist.

I still work in the same job, but it gave me the energy and motivation to have a HUGE bust-up. My main boss was so worried I might leave he went in and read the riot act. It''s not perfect, but a hell of a lot better.

It strikes me that you are not getting this kind of support from the top and I think you are going to make yourself dangerously ill and unhappy staying there.

All the best for the interview.

 

[Gypsy]

THank you Pandora. It is having an negative impact on me. Since the call at lunch I''ve felt less trapped. And all I think when I look at her is ... I HAVE OPTIONS! This one company may not be the company for me (have some important concerns, though it is a good company), but it proves that I am a viable candidate and makes me feel so much better.

I''m sorry for what you went through, it sounds just wrenchingly awful ((HUGS)) and I''m so glad things are better for you now.

I''m very happy with my new therapist, I know what a help that is. And I will find a new psych soon.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Good luck on the interviews!!!!