Calling all cat owners...

[oranges]

I didn't realize how many cat owners there were on PS until I looked through the pet pictures thread this morning! All of the PS fur-babies are absolutely ADORABLE!

Anyway, since there are so many experienced pet owners here, I would love to get your opinions on something that I've been thinking about lately. I have a 4 month old female kitten, Jinx that I adopted when she was 8 weeks old. About a month ago, I decided to foster kittens for my local animal welfare group. However, Jinx did not take kindly to the new little intruders. Even after a few days, she would still attack their cage and it seemed that she especially disliked the female foster (it was a brother/sister pair, same size and age as Jinx). There were two reasons that I was fostering: 1.) good deed, 2.) to potentially adopt another kitten. Needless to say, the foster scenario did not work out. I returned the kitties because it was stressful for them and it was stressful for Jinx. The problem is, I would really love to adopt another kitten. I think that Jinx will need company during the day when I resume work in the fall. She is a very clingy, attention loving kitten who doesn't like being alone! However, after the foster disaster I'm not sure if it's a great idea. I was told by my vet that sometimes cats of opposite sex get along better, so if I wanted to adopt another kitten, try a male. Also she said to get a very young male so that Jinx can be the boss during the adjustment period.

Thoughts? Has anyone had a similar experience? Any tips on introducing another kitten? I'd love to save another life-- it makes me so sad to see so many homeless kitties.

 

[Ravenne]

I agree that cats of opposite sex get along better (the exception is littermates, although that's not a guarantee of course). The most issues I've had with cats getting along have been female/female introductions. Female/male can be a bit hair-raising for a while, but they chill out a lot faster and end up being good buddies (all of mine have anyway).

I've never introduced an older cat to an established kitten so I can't speak to that one, but having Jinx be the older of the two does ring true for me.

Good luck! Goodness knows I'd love to adopt another cat (can't right now because my apartment doesn't allow pets. I even had to leave my baby at home with my parents when I moved out).

 

[tyty333]

I think you are on the right track. However, some cats just don't like other cats. Hopefully yours will adjust if you continue to let her be
the dominate cat.

We had a young male and decided we wanted another. I brought home a younger male...the older male made sure that the younger
male knew he was boss. It calmed down after the initial couple of weeks. Now they are buds. They still get into every now and
then but thats just typical cat nature.

 

[justginger]

We foster for a local rescue group and are always doing introductions. Some just never go well. In those cases, the foster cats stay in their own room and our two female cats have the run of the house -- and at night, we'll put our's up and let the fosters have the run of the house. This happens rarely, mostly only with females with nursing litters, extra protective mommas. Most of the time if you persist, you can get them to get along over time.

Sometimes cats just don't like each other, just like people. I would try to introduce her to a male cat, younger than her, and from a rescue group that allows you an 'introduction period.' The last thing you want is to make a final adoption without having a clue if the cats will ever get along - our rescue group has a 2 week trial period, during which the pet can be returned to their foster family and the full adoption fee is refunded.

All you can really do is try again, definitely with a male. And preferably one younger than her. Introduce them slowly, have the new kitten in a room, bring his things out for her to smell, etc. Then pick him up, let her go in his room, smell around. You know, the good, old fashioned one-week-long introduction that no one seems to bother with anymore. Most people just chuck their new pets together and wonder why they don't get along.

Good luck, having a second cat is something I encourage, unless your established puss simply will not tolerate company (is she Oriental, by any chance?).

 

[zoebartlett]

I agree that getting a male might be best for Jinx. We have two cats. We got our female when she was 9 weeks old. A few months later, we got a male who was 7 weeks old, I think. I chose the male from a brother and sister pair because we already had a female and I had heard the same thing your vet mentioned. They don't always get along (our female is kind of a bully at times), but it's fine overall.

I know the best way to introduce pets is to do it slowly over a period of time, first with them on either side of a closed door. There's more to it but that's what I can remember. We didn't do it that way, but it's probably the best way. I was impatient. My approach was just to open the crate when we brought our male home and let him come out when he wanted to explore. Our female was very interested and within no time, they were interacting appropriately.

 

[tammy77]

We had an old girl, Chloe. We introduced her to my parent's adult male (all cats fixed). She H A T E D him and never got over it even after a month. They took the cat with them when they went home. A few years later, we got a kitten that was approximately 9 weeks old, another male. It took about two weeks of slowly integrating them but they became best friends. When our old girl got sick and passed, Einstein was about a year old. We got a new kitten, another male. The new kitten was maybe 10 weeks old and very mellow. That introduction didn't really take long at all. They were fast friends after a week and are literally inseparable (they're in my avatar).

That said, they still get into little tiffs. Nobody ever gets hurt, but they'll pin their ears back and chase each other. Within a few minutes everything is fine again though, just like siblings.

 

[stargurl78]

My husband bought me a female kitten almost 7 years ago for my birthday. I felt bad that we were never home so a few weeks later, I purchased another female kitten who was younger than the first furbaby. To this day they still don't like each other. So if you plan to get a second cat, I definitely wouldn't get another female.

 

[mogster]

I had two female cats when another female stray started coming into our apartment. One of the two did not take well to that at all and would go up to the stray, pretend to sniff her, but bop her on the head instead and dart away! This went on for months, but they slowly became buddies and would play-chase each other. I think it really depends on the individual cat. She may or may never get along with another cat. I do agree with the other posters that a male might be a better fit.

 

[Meezermom]

I've done it twice with all females. It's a slow process and takes some patience but it can be done. What I did was keep the new kitten in a separate room for about a week letting them sniff each other at the door to the room. I placed a litter box, toys, water and food in the room. I would take the new one out and let my adult cat walk around the room where I was keeping the new kitten, and I'd let the new kitten roam around the family room under my supervision. In the evenings, I would take the new kitten to the family room in a carrier and let the adult cat sniff her through the door to the carrier. Lots of hissing going on (from our adult cat), but every day it got less and less. I also would sometimes feed the new kitten in the carrier where our adult cat would eat. After about a week, when I felt comfortable enough about it, I opened the door and let our adult cat into the kitten's room there was a little bit of hissing (not from the kitten), but not much else after that.

As I said, we've done it twice, we have three female cats and two are best buds (our Siamese with our latest all black domestic medium hair) - our other one and our first, Willow, tolerates the other two but doesn't have much more to do with either one of them.

 

[yssie]

Gosh, how sad! It just really depends on the cat(s). Is Jinx more fearful or aggressive, do you think?


We adopted our first two together - a boy and a girl. The girl is the friendliest, most easy-going cat I've ever known; the boy is more laid-back than most but he's not part teddybear like his sister!

When we brought in our third - a ~7month female stray we named Mina - she'd just had a procedure done so we kept them separated for a long time. We didn't even start introducing them for a week or so and TBH I don't think keeping them apart for so long was helpful, they all just scratched at the door all day long. Gretta was grooming her just a few days after they "met" face-to-face, but Garett took a couple of weeks to really get used to having her around. She was older and had been on the streets so she was (still is) aggressive in confrontation whereas Gretta and Garett are the flee the scene sort, so we got lucky and avoided any fighting.

Mina also just doesn't like change. We brought in our fourth (male), Alex, as a very young kitten and we introduced them over a couple of weeks - they all "met" right away though. Months later Mina still wants nothing to do with him - she just doesn't *like* him! Garett and Gretta were wary at first but not outright scared like they were when we got Mina - probably because Alex was so young and small. He still hasn't figured out that Mina doesn't want to play, and she'll hiss and swipe if he bothers her too much, but she's otherwise content to ignore that he exists and he knows she's the boss even though he's quite a bit bigger than she is now. It's such a contrast to how she behaves with Garett and Gretta though - with them she's a purring, drooling puddle of love! We'll come home to find Garett/Gretta/Alex curled up or Garett/Gretta/Mina curled up but never all four, and at this point I'm not holding my breath


4months is really young, and you got her before she learned aggression elsewhere like our Mina. I'd definitely give it at least one more shot - with a younger male who is physically quite a bit smaller than her, perhaps? Definitely take your time introducing them, too - we put Garett/Gretta/Mina in a large cage and gave Alex the run of the room, instead of the other way round like they usually suggest, and it seemed less volatile all around. That way the bigger cats couldn't prowl around the cage stalking him and he had lots of space to run and hide if it got to be too much.

Our introduction routine (after the one wa cleared as healthy) - we bathed them all first, so they all at least smelled of the same shampoo, and we kept them in separate rooms for a day or two, washing hands between rooms, and then separate rooms for another day or two without washing hands. Then we transferred bedding, and after they stopped hissing every time they walked past it (at this point Gretta was sleeping in it) we let them in the same room at feeding time and put bowls out at opposite corners... we did have to keep a separate litterbox for the new cat for several weeks both times, for some reason though they were okay sharing food and bedding and toys they didn't like sharing litterboxes and we sure as heck preferred dealing w/ another litterbox to the alternative!


Good luck Orange!! We need some pics of Jinx

 

[oranges]

Ravenne, thank you for your feedback. it's good to hear that through your experiences that male/female pairs end up being buddies-- I really hope that happens for me! I'm so sorry about your apartment not allowing pets-- that must be so, so sad to leave yours at your parent's house!

tyty, I also wasn't sure if the tension was just because they were females or because some cats just hate others for no reason! It's so weird how that can happen-- almost as if they're people!

justginger, I have no idea what breed Jinx is-- she's a rescue mutt! Thank you for the info on how to introduce them. The fosters were just in a cage in the kitchen. The volunteer didn't think that it would be a problem. We have a small apartment and I would have put the fosters in our guest bedroom, but it is way, way too hot up there (no AC). I was thinking that I could keep the kitten in my bedroom during the day (Jinx is never in there during the day) and I could crate the kitten at night while Jinx is in there sleeping with us? How does that sound? I actually contacted the rescue group that I adopted Jinx from and asked them about a trial period. We'll see. That would make me SO much more comfortable! This is the little guy that I inquired about : http://www.petfinder.com/petdetail/23435839

SO CUTE!

Zoe, how does your female bully the male? Is there any tension normally? I'm just worried that Jinx's personality will change if she's unhappy long term about having another kitty in the house.

Tammy, that's interesting to hear that your girl didn't get along with an adult male but got along with male kittens. That makes me feel like maybe Jinx will take to a little boy kitty!

Stargurl, I'm sorry that your cats don't get along. That is exactly what I'm trying to avoid-- I've heard a lot about females not liking each other!

Mogster, I also think that a lot has to do with the individual cat. Hopefully I can do a trial period with a shelter and see what happens


Also, this might sound ridiculous, but I also would like two cats because I want to teach Jinx to be accepting of newcomers and to learn how to share being our baby. Since my boyfriend and I are planning to get married and start a family (in a few years), I think that maybe it would be a good idea for Jinx to get used to not being an only child. Thoughts?

 

[oranges]

Meezermom, thank you for the tips on introduction and kudos to you for having 3 females that all get along!

Yssie, whew! 4 cats! That is intense! Hopefully with time (lots of it!) all of your kitties will get along. Cats are weird though! I definitely feel inspired to try again. I feel that with the right technique and trying to find the most laid back, docile male kitten it might just work. Before the foster experience, I never thought of Jinx as aggressive, now I know that she is definitely not a run-and-hide kind of gal! Also, I'm looking into orange males. I've heard that orange males are typically the most calm of cats. Not sure if it's a myth.

As requested, here's another pic of Jinx (the first pic is in the pet pictures thread)

 

[Haven]

Jinx is adorable! One of my childhood kitties was a black cat named Mazi. She slept on my chest every single night for 18 years. She was my constant companion. I LOVE black cats!

We adopted our three boys when they were each around 10 mos/1 year. Vince came home first, and he needed so much attention and interaction, so about a month later we brought Manny home. We kept them in separate rooms for several days, they spent a lot of time sniffing each other under the door. When we let them interact they were fine. I think Vince hissed once, then pounced on Manny and got him to play. THEN, I kind of coerced DH to bring home *just one more* kitty, so Geddy joined the family a month later. We did the same thing--kept the new kitty locked in the bedroom, and kept the other two in the rest of the condo. They were all fine once we opened up the door and let them interact.

I do think boys are better about these things, to be honest. I grew up with lots of cats, and the females were always less social and more territorial. The males were always super laid back and friendly. BUT, that doesn't mean Jinx will never love another cat. I'd try again, but this time I would put the new kitty in a separate room and not a cage out in the open.

I also wonder if the fact that our cats were just a teensy bit older helped, too. I'm not sure about that, but maybe Jinx will be more open to a companion in a couple months.

Good luck!

 

[yssie]

Ohhh she's lovely oranges!!! Definitely needs a playmate


Can you keep both in the bedroom with you - crate the kitten, cover part of the cage w/ a blanket and give him a box to hide in?

I would worry that they wouldn't get much time to get used to each other, and the new guy wouldn't get time to bond with you, if you're out all day and they're separated all day and he's out of the bedroom at night... but I definitely think you're right not to kick Jinx out and disrupt her routine! There'll be some hissing and you might not sleep well for a couple of days but I do think it'd help them acclimate faster.


I haven't been to the pet thread in forever - I'll have to go back for a fix tonight when I get home

 

[yssie]

I do think boys are better about these things, to be honest. I grew up with lots of cats, and the females were always less social and more territorial. The males were always super laid back and friendly.

Blarney! Our Gretta could subsist entirely on cuddles She's a tortie too.

 

[zoebartlett]

It's nothing serious. She usually just swats at the male as he walks by. Also, if he's lying on the bed or the couch, she'll sometimes decide that she wants to be in the same exact spot, so she'll simply worm her way in until he moves. They occasionally fight and hiss but it's pretty rare. Our male is usually just a doormat and he lets her walk all over him.

 

[Haven]

I do think boys are better about these things, to be honest. I grew up with lots of cats, and the females were always less social and more territorial. The males were always super laid back and friendly.

Blarney! Our Gretta could subsist entirely on cuddles She's a tortie too.

My lady kitties were always super cuddly with us, but not so much with strangers. All of the boys I've had have always been equal opportunity cuddlers, and the three we have now are particularly loving with newcomers to our home. Granted, in my entire lifetime I've only had three female cats and five males, so it's not exactly a large sample size.

 

[Ravenne]

Also, this might sound ridiculous, but I also would like two cats because I want to teach Jinx to be accepting of newcomers and to learn how to share being our baby. Since my boyfriend and I are planning to get married and start a family (in a few years), I think that maybe it would be a good idea for Jinx to get used to not being an only child. Thoughts?

Not ridiculous at all. Again, this is just my experience, so take it for what it's worth. I've had 9 cats and the ones that were raised with another cat in the mix, ended up being much more sociable and less skittish (around other cats and humans) than those that were raised as "only children." For instance.. Kilo was an only child as a kitten. And that cat was cray cray. I'm about the only person she liked. She was 2.5 by the time we started bringing in newcomers and she didn't care for that too much (although she did like Pixel, but he lasted the longest [lord that sounds awful. I lived in farm country and we have coyotes and such, and cats disappear and reappear frequently] and she did take a long time to warm up to him). Now Pixel on the other hand... he was raised with Kilo until we had to have her put down when he was about a year old. Then we almost immediately found Cleo and Pharoah, on the same day, separately, and by accident, no less (I was going through an Egypt phase, okay?). Pharoah was killed by a pack of dogs before his first birthday, but they all got along great and Pix and Cleo were huge buddies until she died of unknown causes when they were 6. Pixel is now 10 and has been the only cat since Cleo died, but he's a huge ladies man now and craves attention, but he's not obnoxious about getting it. Lol. He's a good old boy. Shanga was an "only child" as well until Kilo came along when she was about 2 and she ran off because she couldn't stand Kilo one bit. She was a huge sass (gorgeous cat though. Grey and white longhair with perfect face mask and stockings). Ying and Yang were littermates and best friends until Ying disappeared, then Yang ran off as well. Sad day. But they were both absolute sweethearts.

Wow that got a lot longer than I thought it would. I think I just showed myself for the crazy cat lady I truly am.

 

[Haven]

Wow that got a lot longer than I thought it would. I think I just showed myself for the crazy cat lady I truly am.

You're in very good company here, Ravenne.
There seems to be some unspoken connection between "crazy diamond lady" and "crazy cat lady."

 

[Ravenne]

Good to know, Haven! LOL! I do lurve my kitties.

 

[yssie]

I do think boys are better about these things, to be honest. I grew up with lots of cats, and the females were always less social and more territorial. The males were always super laid back and friendly.

Blarney! Our Gretta could subsist entirely on cuddles She's a tortie too.

My lady kitties were always super cuddly with us, but not so much with strangers. All of the boys I've had have always been equal opportunity cuddlers, and the three we have now are particularly loving with newcomers to our home. Granted, in my entire lifetime I've only had three female cats and five males, so it's not exactly a large sample size.

Well I'm four and four so I've got just about as much room to talk

The other girl cuddles on her own terms and hates strangers - kinda like yours, sounds like. The boys are sorta middle of the road. My parents' male... if looks could kill, sometimes... we had three others before but I don't remember them being remarkable either way.

I've just been really wanting to say blarney for a couple of days

 

[radiantquest]

Jinx is super cute. Ever since I got my black cat, they are my favorite.

My first cat was a male. I wanted him to stay the Alpha in the house. The rest are all female.

First female is just a basket case. She is still afraid of the dishwasher 6 years later! She never did assert herself as Ms. Alpha with any of the other cats so sometimes she gets chased.

I always introduced as kittens. They are not best buds, but they are always polite to each other. I wish they snuggled more, but they just dont. They each have very distinct personalities and treat each other as well as they treat their humans. Complete Indifference unless they are hungry.

 

[oranges]

Haven + radiantquest, I am a huge black cat lover too!!! The woman who was volunteering at the adoption event where I met Jinx actually was SHOCKED that I wanted the black kitten. She actually gave me a 50% discount. She was worried that Jinxy would never get adopted just because of her color. Apparently black cats and dogs are the least likely to get adopted and most likely to be put down in kill shelters ... I had no idea! And that absolutely horrifies me-- black cats rule!

Yssie, due to the fact that my guest bedroom has no AC, I'll have to keep the kitten in my bedroom all day + night -- so Jinx will only be exposed to the kitten at night. I think you're right-- this will probably be good. They will have plenty of separation, but they will also learn how to share space. Kitten will just be in a crate at night to keep him safe from the evil Jinxy girl. I'm actually off for the summer since I teach so this is a really great time to bond with Jinx and hopefully another kitten! I still haven't heard back from the shelter about trial periods. I really hope that they have one!

 

[justginger]

Speaking in the broadest terms, and the experience of fostering around 50 cats and kittens in the last couple of years, the boys are consistently the friendliest, cuddliest, and most laid back. Obviously there are exceptions, as my only "foster failure" (who I kept) is female. I have also found the ginger kittens to be quite high energy but mostly passive when it comes to spats.

Do you have a bathroom to start the new kitten in? It really is best to have new cats completely separate for the first few days, if at all possible. It also makes clean up easier on tiles - they're forever kicking litter everywhere and falling into their own water dish!

Going through a rescue organization with foster care in place is always the best way to ensure you get the right personality of pet. As a foster mom, I know how the animal behaves in a home setting and can tell you more than "she likes pats and fish treats," you know? You can approach the organization, explain that you're looking for a submissive, friendly, young male and see who they suggest. It makes for a happier household when new members are chosen for their personalities and not just looks. You'd be sutprised how shallow people are with cats though - I'll have a litter of kittens, the smoochiest, sweetest will be plain black and the scattiest, least friendly will look Siamese...and the black kitten will be passed over so quickly her poor little head will spin!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

I'm also a black cat lover!!! They have the best personalities. That said, as was mentioned above by another poster, some cats don't like other cats. Does Jinx ever see other cats when he's on a windowsill and how has he reacted? One of my cats (a female) NEVER got along with any of the cats we had and she use to hiss when she'd see cats walk by, however, we did always have at least one other cat while we had her and she would bicker with them. My current cat (a male) totally wants a play mate and makes beeping noises and little meers when he sees other cats. I think cats are rather vocal when it comes to how much socialization they want with other kitties.

 

[Haven]

It's so sad but true that black cats and dogs are the hardest to adopt. (At least, that's what our local shelter says, too.)

Can I share a picture of my Mazi? She was so special. I miss her so much.

 

[justginger]

Yes, black kitties are difficult to place. Even with an effusive ad (all true!) for my current black foster, she only had 2 enquiries in 6 weeks! In all likelihood those were because she is med-long haired, which we don't have many of right now.

Haven, your kitty is gorgeous. The first cat we had that was MINE was black too, Ozzie. Such a sweet boy. He had a long-standing thyroid based illness and passed away at my parents' house last year. I was so upset because it was only 2 weeks before I visited, so I missed seeing him for the last time.

 

[Haven]

Oh, how terrible JustGinger. I'm so sorry.
I adopted Mazi and her sister Bootsie when I was 10-years-old. (Used all my savings for the adoption fee!) They both passed away when I was 28. Mazi had a mast cell tumor, and Bootsie had hyperthyroidism. We ran a little geriatric kitty unit in our house for a while there--IV fluids for Mazi twice a day, meds for Bootsie twice a day. The things we do for our furbabies!

I wish more people knew how wonderful black kitties and doggies are!

 

[yssie]

That's such a sweet pic, she was a beauty

 

[oranges]

Speaking in the broadest terms, and the experience of fostering around 50 cats and kittens in the last couple of years, the boys are consistently the friendliest, cuddliest, and most laid back. Obviously there are exceptions, as my only "foster failure" (who I kept) is female. I have also found the ginger kittens to be quite high energy but mostly passive when it comes to spats.

Do you have a bathroom to start the new kitten in? It really is best to have new cats completely separate for the first few days, if at all possible. It also makes clean up easier on tiles - they're forever kicking litter everywhere and falling into their own water dish!

Going through a rescue organization with foster care in place is always the best way to ensure you get the right personality of pet. As a foster mom, I know how the animal behaves in a home setting and can tell you more than "she likes pats and fish treats," you know? You can approach the organization, explain that you're looking for a submissive, friendly, young male and see who they suggest. It makes for a happier household when new members are chosen for their personalities and not just looks. You'd be sutprised how shallow people are with cats though - I'll have a litter of kittens, the smoochiest, sweetest will be plain black and the scattiest, least friendly will look Siamese...and the black kitten will be passed over so quickly her poor little head will spin!

Unfortunately I only have one bathroom in my apartment, and that is where I have Jinx's litter box. The apartment situation is certainly not ideal for introducing new kitties. What do you think of the plan that I came up with to keep him in my bedroom and only allow Jinx in at night to keep her routine normal? I couldn't leave him in a sweltering hot spare bedroom in the middle of July! I find it amazing that people care more about looks that personality with cats. Weird. I think that black cats are absolutely gorgeous-- based on looks alone they are my favorite!