Wedding Bummin'' hard about my dress.

[musey]

There's not really anything that can be done about it, so this is pretty much a worthless vent.

When I ordered my gown, I was in-between an 8 and a 10 (bridal sizes). I had recently had to gain weight and was already in the process of losing it, and I knew I'd be an 8 or below by the wedding. They tried to talk my into ordering up because "this dress is a cinch to take in," but I insisted on the 8.

Good thing I did!

The dress came in in late April, and I had my first fitting. It was huge on me!! Like, 2 sizes too big! Which is very strange, because my measurements lined up just barely below an 8 on the Pronovias chart. Granted, my waist measurement was the deviator at about 1 inch below the chart... but still. I said I was worried about taking it in because of all the beading and pleated mesh, etc., and they said no no, it will be totally fine. Okay, they know their stuff, I guess.

They recommended a second fitting with the tailor in early August, so I got the first appointment that month. When I went in for the "final fitting," while it had been taken in, it still was not fitting right. It was perfect in the hips, too big in the stomach, and the hook-and-eye is WAY too tight--gives me double-boob on the sides!

(Now I feel like I should change my hair to a down-do to cover said double-boob.) Even though the hook-and-eye is very tight, the gown still feels like it's sinking when I put it on. I asked if it would be possible to make changes, and they said it wouldn't be back in time.


I don't know whether I'm over-reacting here, but I'm used to wearing formalwear that's very tight in the waist so that it just 'sits' over the bodice, so there are no inappropriate bulges.

Anyway, the wedding is in 5 days... so there's really nothing that can be done. But I'm so bummed out. I feel like I'm just going to feel/look uncomfortable and not like myself.


Here is the gown in question:
http://www.pricescope.com/forum/op-requested/musey-s-wedding-gown-t73518.html
http://www.pricescope.com/forum/bride-world-wide-grooms-grooves/first-fitting-yes-pics-included-t84336.html

 

[iheartscience]

Okay, first of all, I''m sure you''re going to look fantastic in your gorgeous dress.

Now-not to send you into mass hysteria, but there MUST be something they can do about it! You live in LA, right? I''m sure there are tons and tons of good tailors. I would call around, cry and beg if necessary, and take the gown to someone who can finish it in time.

And it is just unacceptable to me that the bridal place is telling you too bad! Unacceptable. They need to make it happen for you. I think it''s time to throw a fit.

 

[HollyS]

Musey, even when it wasn''t fitted yet, you looked beautiful in that dress. Truly. Everything will be fine; and if it''s not quite ''right'', only you will notice. No one noticed that my dress was not as fitted in the bust as it should have been; but they did give me tons of compliments. So I know that your issues will go unnoticed. Focus on being happy, and your glow will be what everyone does notice.

You''re going to be lovely in your dress. Really.

 

[musey]

Thanks, ladies. I know that I''m the only one who will notice... but I guess I just feel proud of my waist that I''ve worked so hard on, it seems a shame that it isn''t accentuated the way I thought it would be. Maybe I need to wear those clamps they have at the bridal salon.

Thing, I guess I should clarify that they didn''t say it couldn''t be done, just that it would be risky and I would have to pay the tailor rush fees... and our budget is already tight tight tight. PLUS, my parents are flying in early tomorrow morning, then FIs parents in the afternoon, then my brothers, etc. etc... and I just feel so overwhelmed that I don''t even want to think about it. Maybe that''s a sign that it''s not truly bad enough to be upset over. I don''t know.

I think it''s mostly about how I feel in it... I thought it would be perfectly fit post-alterations, and I just feel like I had to tug on it to keep it up... and I hate that. I feel like if I''m getting double-boob from the tight hook-and-eye, I should at LEAST get a stay-put dress out of it.

 

[LaraOnline]

What Holly said. The fact is that it is a jaw-dropping dress, just gorgeous. The swathes of fabric mean that most people - and especially your fiance - is just not going to have a CLUE that the fit is not perfect for you. If the dress is falling slightly, that is something to consider... perhaps you will have to go for foundational undergarments to help that dress stay up? You should discuss that with the dress makers, but also investigate yourself.

The most important thing is to have fun and not stress about the little details. The fact is, little things can and do go wrong during wedding planning, most people have a couple of little ''issues''.

I don''t know whether it''s worth me telling you about my little disasters - I was sold on tiny strings of diamontes on what was basically a strapless dress. At the last minute, they told me my dress would have to have proper straps!!! I would have preferred a strapless, if they had informed me correctly in the first place. So that really upset me. Also, I completely forgot to wear my petticoat, and found it impossible to walk/or dance for the entire day. But...best day of my life! I hope it is the same for you.

It''s important to look at the big picture, and enjoy the day for what it is.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 9/29/2008 8:17:08 PM
Author: musey
Thanks, ladies. I know that I''m the only one who will notice... but I guess I just feel proud of my waist that I''ve worked so hard on, it seems a shame that it isn''t accentuated the way I thought it would be. Maybe I need to wear those clamps they have at the bridal salon.


Thing, I guess I should clarify that they didn''t say it couldn''t be done, just that it would be risky and I would have to pay the tailor rush fees... and our budget is already tight tight tight. PLUS, my parents are flying in early tomorrow morning, then FIs parents in the afternoon, then my brothers, etc. etc... and I just feel so overwhelmed that I don''t even want to think about it. Maybe that''s a sign that it''s not truly bad enough to be upset over. I don''t know.


I think it''s mostly about how I feel in it... I thought it would be perfectly fit post-alterations, and I just feel like I had to tug on it to keep it up... and I hate that. I feel like if I''m getting double-boob from the tight hook-and-eye, I should at LEAST get a stay-put dress out of it.

I think the bridal shop should pay the rush fees or the tailor should waive them if the work they did is not perfect. Any way you can sic your mom or dad on them if you''re not the super firm/slightly angry mean voice type? But if you don''t feel like dealing with it, I''m sure no one but you will notice. (And I''m not just saying that!)

I''m sorry you''re bummed-I should have said that before I went on the offensive! I like to try to make things happen even when it''s not me!

 

[musey]

Thanks Lara

The tailor put in boning because the falling-down issue was happening pre-alterations as well, and that''s helped a bit. I don''t know what else would help keep it up. I have a corset that doesn''t do much to my waist other than stiffen everything, and I tried it with that... seemed to make it even worse (like the dress was slipping against the satin of the corset).

I''m not used to having this falling-down issue--my hips & butt are really big compared to my other proportions, so they''ve always done a good job of keeping things up

Urgh.

I just tried it on commando, and it was better--especially the tight hook-and-eye and double-boob issue. I think the answer to my problem may be one of those sticky bras (nu bra?), because the underwire and wrap of my strapless bra seem to be adding needless bulk.

 

[musey]

Date: 9/29/2008 8:31:00 PM
Author: thing2of2
I think the bridal shop should pay the rush fees or the tailor should waive them if the work they did is not perfect. Any way you can sic your mom or dad on them if you're not the super firm/slightly angry mean voice type? But if you don't feel like dealing with it, I'm sure no one but you will notice. (And I'm not just saying that!)

I'm sorry you're bummed-I should have said that before I went on the offensive! I like to try to make things happen even when it's not me!

I know the feeling

I think that it's standard, because they even said that some brides need more than one tailor session, but that my dress wouldn't "need it"--which is why I did my appointment when I did. Otherwise I would/could have gone in earlier.

I dunno. I honestly feel as though it may just not be possible... all the pleating and lace layers make it really difficult to just cinch the waist in, sew it up and call it a day. So he may have just done all he could.

Makes me want to eat donuts all week... may as well, if I've got the extra room in my dress

Thank you for the support and suggestions. I'm trying to take a step back and look at it objectively, whether another tailoring is possible or would help.

 

[oobiecoo]

Is there a way to just change the hook and eye before the wedding? or would that make it fall down?

I''m sure you will look beautiful and no one will notice it isn''t perfect! Enjoy your last 5 days before the wedding and try not to stress!

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 9/29/2008 8:35:30 PM
Author: musey

Date: 9/29/2008 8:31:00 PM

Author: thing2of2

I think the bridal shop should pay the rush fees or the tailor should waive them if the work they did is not perfect. Any way you can sic your mom or dad on them if you''re not the super firm/slightly angry mean voice type? But if you don''t feel like dealing with it, I''m sure no one but you will notice. (And I''m not just saying that!)


I''m sorry you''re bummed-I should have said that before I went on the offensive! I like to try to make things happen even when it''s not me!

I know the feeling

I think that it''s standard, because they even said that some brides need more than one tailor session, but that my dress wouldn''t ''need it.''


I dunno. I honestly feel as though it may just not be possible... all the pleating and lace layers make it really difficult to just cinch the waist in, sew it up and call it a day. So he may have just done all he could.


Makes me want to eat donuts all week... may as well, if I''ve got the extra room in my dress

Thank you for the support and suggestions. I''m trying to take a step back and look at it objectively, whether another tailoring is possible or would help.

I gotcha...well it sounds like it''s better without the bra, corset, etc., so that''s good news! I bet stepping back and just sleeping on it will help you figure it out.

But either way, I love your dress (LOVE IT!) and you look fantastic in it so I''m sure everything will turn out perfectly! Now go have a donut or two!

 

[geckodani]

Date: 9/29/2008 8:31:45 PM
Author: musey
Thanks Lara

The tailor put in boning because the falling-down issue was happening pre-alterations as well, and that's helped a bit. I don't know what else would help keep it up. I have a corset that doesn't do much to my waist other than stiffen everything, and I tried it with that... seemed to make it even worse (like the dress was slipping against the satin of the corset).

I'm not used to having this falling-down issue--my hips & butt are really big compared to my other proportions, so they've always done a good job of keeping things up

Urgh.

I just tried it on commando, and it was better--especially the tight hook-and-eye and double-boob issue. I think the answer to my problem may be one of those sticky bras (nu bra?), because the underwire and wrap of my strapless bra seem to be adding needless bulk.

Definitely go for the nu bra, or just wear petals so you don't have poky nips.

I had the world's worst dress tailoring experience. And there were issues... and I had arm boob - until I had them tack bra cups in so I didn't have to wear a bra - voila, problem solved. Try the options that don't require a "real" bra and I bet it'll sort itself out.

Is it hard-core slipping, or just a little? If it's slipping because of the weight of the dress, you might be out of luck. If not, you can try boob tape to keep the neckline in place. but it's not that strong...

Can they literally sew you into the dress to make it more snug without it destroying the lines of the dress? I was sewn and taped into mine... looked great... DH had a ball getting me out...

Bottom line though - my dress had issues, even on the day of. There's this huge line going right down the front that we forgot to steam out and didn't notice until it was on my bod. And you know what - no one noticed, and it's barely noticeable in pics, and only if I'm looking for it.

At the end of the day it's about the day- not the dress.

That said, I'd totally go apeshit trying on all undergarment options available.

ETA: Also, what makes you beautiful is YOU, and how happy you are to be getting married!

 

[musey]

Thanks oobiecoo! You''re right, I need to caaaalm myself! The "eye" of the hook-and-eye could maybe be longer, but the placement can''t be changed (they''re already on the edge). I could just not fasten it and see how that is. It was an add-on in the first place, the dress didn''t come with it.

And thank you thing2. I think it''s easy once the dress is "mine" to be annoyed with it and lose that lovin'' feelin'' that I had the first couple of times I tried it on. I need to remember that it didn''t stop being beautiful just because it''s been hanging in the hallway for a few weeks

 

[musey]

Date: 9/29/2008 8:43:01 PM
Author: geckodani
Is it hard-core slipping, or just a little? If it''s slipping because of the weight of the dress, you might be out of luck. If not, you can try boob tape to keep the neckline in place. but it''s not that strong...

It''s definitely because of the weight of the dress-that thing is hea-VY!

Can they literally sew you into the dress to make it more snug without it destroying the lines of the dress? I was sewn and taped into mine... looked great... DH had a ball getting me out...

I mean, I guess, in theory? I don''t know how it would work with my dress... I think maybe, actually, we could sew it to my corset thingy, which rests on my hips very securely. Hmmm...

Bottom line though - my dress had issues, even on the day of. There''s this huge line going right down the front that we forgot to steam out and didn''t notice until it was on my bod. And you know what - no one noticed, and it''s barely noticeable in pics, and only if I''m looking for it.

At the end of the day it''s about the day- not the dress.

That said, I''d totally go apeshit trying on all undergarment options available.

ETA: Also, what makes you beautiful is YOU, and how happy you are to be getting married!

You''re so right. CALM down, musey!!

 

[geckodani]

((HUGS)) It''s all going to work out!

 

[pjean]

Holy crap, that''s a gorgeous dress. I seriously doubt anyone is going to see anything other than floaty, romantic, curvy, graceful amazingness.

So if you can find a way to make it more comfortable, then yay. Tacking it to a corset seems like a good thing to try, but if that doesn''t work there''s always duct tape.

If not, just be sure you don''t hitch it up during your vows, and you''re good to go.

DAMN, that''s a gorgeous dress.

 

[musey]

Oh thank you pjean, that helps

 

[purrfectpear]

My dear, that dress is drop dead fantabulousity with bridal clamps. You know it will be a stunner now

You is stressin''

I can''t wait for your wedding and to see you radiant in your pics

 

[Krissie]

Musey, you are a total stunner and that dress looks amazing on you. I think this is really the anxiety talking - it distorts everything and we are our own worst critics. Everyone will be blown away, I promise!

 

[kama_s]

Ohh musey!! You look so gorgeous, you really shouldn't worry AT ALL. We are always our worst critics....I cant see any of the things you're worried about! Your waist looks itsy bitsy, and I'd die to have your figure!

You'll be one beautiful bride, dont worry about anything and enjoy your day!

P.S.: Have you ever tried a nu bra? I once wore one under an open back dress and I was super uncomfortable all night....and mind you, I have a miniscule rack. I'd suggest you try it out prior to the w-day. Have you tried one of those seamless bras? Bare necessities have some wonderful ones, here are a few:

http://www.barenecessities.com/Le-Mystere-Strapless-Bra_product_LeMystre755_,search,.htm
http://www.barenecessities.com/Le-Mystere-Dream-Shameless-Contour-Strapless-Bra_product_LeMystereLN9755_,search,.htm

And this bandeau one that I cant wait to get:

http://www.barenecessities.com/Calvin-Klein-Solutions-Bandeau-Soft-Cup-Bra_product_CalvinKleinD3125_,search,.htm

 

[VRBeauty]

Musey: First and foremost, I love love love your dress! I''m sure it will be beautiful no matter what!

You mentioned that the tailor added boning. Did she also add a waistband to the boning? If not, that might help.

 

[October2008bride]

Oh Musey that is so frustrating!!!

Of course you would look gorgeous n a paper bag, but you paid for a stunning Pronvios and I don''t think you should have to settle! That is ridiculsous that the store said that you''d have to pay rush fees for further alterations. They clearly haven''t done them right and should take care of it.

I personally wouldn''t give up on the alterations. My beaded Reem Acra had all the alterations done over a span of 2 days, so you should be able to get it done in 1.

And don''t let my financial planner FI know I said this, but even if there was a further expense, I''d say it was worth it to make sure you feel FAB in your dress!!! Id rather see you spend another hundred or two than waste the couple thousand the dress cost...you know?

Anyways - I hope it works out for you!

 

[Hera]

I had a problem the day before I got maried and my seamstress worked on it overnight to make sure it was perfect. Maybe see if you can find someone else?

 

[doodle]

sweetie, de-stress immediately. you look so ridiculously GORGEOUS in that dress that it makes me mad...okay, not mad, but definitely jealous! i WISH i looked as good in my dress! rock it with pride and don''t panic over it!

 

[Sabine]

This probably won''t help with the waist issue, but since you said you tried it on with a corset, could you just sew the corset bra into the dress? If the corset is tight enough, it will keep the dress up and at least make you feel like you don''t need to keep tugging on it to keep it up.

I had my bra sewn in because my dress was slipping slightly in the back, and I didn''t want the bra to show at all. It was a bit of a pain to get into because my MOH had to fasten the bra while someone else held the dress up in place, but it really made me feel more secure all night. At the end of the night, it was easy to just snip the bra out of the dress.

 

[bee*]

Aww sorry to hear that musey! Your dress is to die for and you''ll look amazing in it no matter what!

 

[julesbeth]

Yo Musey - Don''t stress, you are gorgeous and tiny and I am sure you look absolutely stunning.

If you don''t do anything to the dress, I would assume it would ''stretch'' a bit. I have heard from some of my bride friends that the dress should start out a little tight, and as you wear it around it gives a little. I could be lying - as we are Oct 4 buddies together, but I will keep my fingers crossed for you.

How are things otherwise? All ready to go?!!

 

[kittybean]

Musey, just wanted to say I''m sorry about your pretty, pretty dress. Honestly, in the pictures I''ve seen, it really looks fantastic on you. You look thin as can be . Hope everything else is going smoothly!