Wedding asking sisters to be bridesmaids?

[Smurfysmiles]

I am planning to ask my 2 sisters to be in the wedding but one lives in iowa and the other in colorado...im in north dakota lol. ill be moving in a month to colorado so i thought i would just wait to ask my sister there then (it's so hard to hold it in!) and i won't see the other sister until christmas...what is the proper etiquette for asking my sister in iowa? i wouldn't want to wait until christmas because she might think i am just asking the one sister when word spreads in a month....could i ask them both over the phone?

sorry im asking so many questions haha, my wedding planning book i got doesn't quite cover everything...maybe i should get an etiquette book too! also i got into a whirlwind because it's been confirmed with everyone that the wedding will be in october or november (preferably october) of 2009 so i got excited and i want to try and get a good chunk of things done before i move in a month to colorado because the wedding will be here at "home" in north dakota and i dont want to do a terrible amount of things via the phone for vendors

 

[JerseyGrl81]

Why don''t you ask both of them at Christmas? That way you can do it together. I know it will be tough to wait that long! Otherwise, ask your one sister when you move close to her, then around the same time ask your other sister over the phone- explain to her your reason for doing it over the phone and not in person.

 

[kittybean]

I think asking your sisters in person is a wonderful, personal idea, but please consider that everyone will be curious as to who is in your wedding party now that you''re engaged. People will immediately start to wonder if they are in or out. When people ask you who will be in your wedding party, are you just going to say, "I don''t know yet," or will you say that your sisters will be your attendants before you ask them? It may just be better to ask your sisters over the phone instead of waiting a few months. I assume you''ll want to begin planning right away, and I just think it''s easier when you have the "official" wedding party in place.

I took a pretty pragmatic approach and asked three of my girls over the phone since they were out of town. I realize this isn''t the most sentimental or personal way to ask them, but they were still very excited and happy, and we were able to settle who was in the wedding party very quickly. I was in a sorority, so I am very close with a lot of girls, and it was good to make a choice right away so I wasn''t "stringing along" the girls that wouldn''t be my bridesmaids. I don''t have any biological sisters, by the way, so you likely won''t have the same issues, but if you are going to ask other people, it''s something to think about.

Have you considered sending them some thoughtful cards or letters to ask them to be in your wedding? I think a handmade card or heartfelt letter is something they would probably be thrilled to receive and would really treasure. Of course, you know your sisters best, so you can decide what might be appropriate; I just wanted to provide a little food for thought from my experience.

 

[Sabine]

A lot of girls try to do something really special to ask their bridesmaids, and I''m guessing if you search the threads you can find tons of stuff like hand-made cards and poems to ask them. Me, I was just so overcome with excitement that I blurted it out over the phone without putting much thought into it beforehand.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Well with my 4 other bridesmaids (yeah it''s a bit of a large party, oh well i''ve been best friends with them since 4th grade and see them all at least once every two weeks so it was all just assumed by them and me and has been talked about many a time over cocktails at the bars over the years(you can be my bridesmaid if i can be yours sort of thing lol) so we went out to dinner and just immediately started talking about bridesmaid dresses because we were all so excited haha my 2 sisters on the other hand are a bit older (youngest is 39 oldest is 40, im 24 and i don''t think they are expecting me to ask them to be honest, but i really want them in it. i really like that idea of sending a card, i will have to go see if i can find some good ones tomorrow. thanks for the suggestions

 

[marchswallowbird]

I asked my sister via email.

I don''t think it''s a problem doing it over the phone.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Smurfysmiles, looks like you have some good options already! I made a card for my BM that is out of state and she loved it. I bought stickers from target, a pack of blank cards and some more stickers from Michael''s! It cost me a bit more than buying a pre-made card in the end, but it was personalized so oh well. Plus now I have those blank cards to make something later!

Anyway, sounds like you''re on the right track.