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Anyone watching the new J&K+8 tonight?

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She said she was really upset that people make up stories and print them, "Whether they''re true or not," and that these allegations really made her mad. Then she had to change the subject because she said she was so mad about it. It was maybe one of two scenes that showed any actual emotion. She just seems dead right now.

I definitely don''t see how the marriage can survive with the cameras still on right now. I think he''d welcome it and see it as a sign that she was actually willing to put THEM first again...but I don''t think she will. She wants to be Kate, super mom and style icon, the mom all other moms envy, instead of being humble Kate, wife and mother, fading into the background of TV history.
 
What baffles me is how they are STILL doing the show. If I were in their shoes and had all sorts of horrible rumors flying around about me and my maybe cheating husband (he claims he didn''t cheat but it sounds like there might have been some emotional cheating going on) I would be putting a stop to the show. How can continuing being in the spotlight do any good?

I agree with everyone that it was just uncomfortable to watch. They didn''t appear to acknowledge each other AT ALL at the party but I do wonder if TLC just edited it out for the sake of ratings and wants us all to believe that they don''t even talk now.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 10:39:58 AM
Author: princesss
She said she was really upset that people make up stories and print them, ''Whether they''re true or not,'' and that these allegations really made her mad. Then she had to change the subject because she said she was so mad about it. It was maybe one of two scenes that showed any actual emotion. She just seems dead right now.


I definitely don''t see how the marriage can survive with the cameras still on right now. I think he''d welcome it and see it as a sign that she was actually willing to put THEM first again...but I don''t think she will. She wants to be Kate, super mom and style icon, the mom all other moms envy, instead of being humble Kate, wife and mother, fading into the background of TV history.

Interesting...that''s sad that she is not *really* putting her family first. I have never craved any fame but I do believe it can really change a person. The fact that she is ONLY famous b/c of her children is kinda sad. She is far from super mom IMHO.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 10:24:40 AM
Author: Tacori E-ring
I did not watch last night so maybe it is not fair for me to comment. Kate (according to articles) is gone over half of the year on speaking engagements. She does NOT seem like a nice woman. She is rude to her fans and seems DRIVEN by money. Do I feel badly that she has to go through marriage problems on national TV? NO WAY! It was THEIR choice to do their show. They have made a fortune. They have nannies, cooks, maids, gardeners, etc...all which NEVER would have happened w/o their show. Show business is all or nothing. You cannot just have the benefits w/o the drawbacks. I feel bad for the kids. They are the ONLY victims. Meanwhile I think the show is boring and they should retire it. It was cute when they were little but now...the charm is gone. She is NOT an everyday woman making it work which I believe is what made the show successful at first. Anyone who thinks that is greatly mislead.
Well put, Tacori.

I do watch the show frequently and I feel that J&K have gotten more and more distant as time goes by.

I totally agree that they are NOT anything like the average family trying to get by. All the work is done for them!

That said, it would be extremely difficult to raise 8 kids and it would put my marriage to the test. I can understand wating to do the show for $$ (8 college funds, anyone?), however, it was a CHOICE for them to do the show and they knew what they were getting into. They can''t back out now just because it''s not convenient anymore. You take the good with the bad.
I feel very bad for the kids. I feel like their world is about to crumble and they just don''t know it yet.
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I can''t fault this woman for milking the show for all its worth. When the show doesn''t get ratings anymore, I have no doubt that the producers will just cut them off. It''s business. They have EIGHT children to raise and if it were me, my mind would be in overddrive like hers is to try and get the most I can to secure their financial future. Sometimes I''m overwhelmed thinking about what I have to do to properly save for ONE child!

I haven''t seen much of the show but I do believe that if she could have all the help and financial stability without the fame, she would be happy to go back into obscurity. I have no doubt that both parents love those children. I don''t believe that she''s sucking those kids dry for her own happiness. She seems a savvy woman and probably knows the years for this gravy train are seriously numbered.

As far as her marriage goes, I think she''s choosing her kids over her husband. Yes, if her marriage mattered, she''d quit the show and focus on their family. But a huge part of stability in familial life comes from financial stability and opportunities like this don''t grow on trees.

People say that they should have known what fame would entail. Well, yeah, it seems like common sense, but people also have a strong sense of untouchable syndrome...that "it won''t happen to me" feeling. I don''t think any average person could possibly REALLY know how insane it could get until it was too late. The public always prefers the salicious over the sentimental.
 
Also, Kate is famous for saying, ''it''s always been about the kids'' - ''I do everything for my kids,'' - but any happily married couple with kids KNOWS, you have to put the MARRIAGE first, then the kids...that''s the healthy order for a strong marriage and well adjusted kids. Kate seems to have put Jon on the same level as the kids, a step below her authority. That does not a happy marriage make. No one gets a happy/strong marriage by accident...it takes hard work, which is not the same as constant criticism.

And I thought she would say exactly what she said, about being hard on Jon, but that this is all his fault, that he made bad choices...well, she has as well. Until she grows up enough and takes responsibility for her poor choices (how she treats others), she will never be a happy person.

And she also threw in the ''parents of multiples have a higher divorce rate'' fact - perhaps to deflect some of the ''blame'' off of them...I can imagine it is VERY hard to raise multiples, however, in that case, you should be MORE supportive and understanding of your spouse in order to keep it together...they really needed counseling...long overdue.


I think fame magnifies a person''s best or worst personality traits....with Kate, it brought out the worst in her, to the detriment of her marriage and family.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 11:33:03 AM
Author: TravelingGal
I can''t fault this woman for milking the show for all its worth. When the show doesn''t get ratings anymore, I have no doubt that the producers will just cut them off. It''s business. They have EIGHT children to raise and if it were me, my mind would be in overddrive like hers is to try and get the most I can to secure their financial future. Sometimes I''m overwhelmed thinking about what I have to do to properly save for ONE child!

I haven''t seen much of the show but I do believe that if she could have all the help and financial stability without the fame, she would be happy to go back into obscurity. I have no doubt that both parents love those children. I don''t believe that she''s sucking those kids dry for her own happiness. She seems a savvy woman and probably knows the years for this gravy train are seriously numbered.

As far as her marriage goes, I think she''s choosing her kids over her husband. Yes, if her marriage mattered, she''d quit the show and focus on their family. But a huge part of stability in familial life comes from financial stability and opportunities like this don''t grow on trees.

People say that they should have known what fame would entail. Well, yeah, it seems like common sense, but people also have a strong sense of untouchable syndrome...that ''it won''t happen to me'' feeling. I don''t think any average person could possibly REALLY know how insane it could get until it was too late. The public always prefers the salicious over the sentimental.

Ditto this 100%! You took the words right out of my brain!
 
Date: 5/26/2009 11:33:03 AM
Author: TravelingGal
I can''t fault this woman for milking the show for all its worth. When the show doesn''t get ratings anymore, I have no doubt that the producers will just cut them off. It''s business. They have EIGHT children to raise and if it were me, my mind would be in overddrive like hers is to try and get the most I can to secure their financial future. Sometimes I''m overwhelmed thinking about what I have to do to properly save for ONE child!

I haven''t seen much of the show but I do believe that if she could have all the help and financial stability without the fame, she would be happy to go back into obscurity. I have no doubt that both parents love those children. I don''t believe that she''s sucking those kids dry for her own happiness. She seems a savvy woman and probably knows the years for this gravy train are seriously numbered.

As far as her marriage goes, I think she''s choosing her kids over her husband. Yes, if her marriage mattered, she''d quit the show and focus on their family. But a huge part of stability in familial life comes from financial stability and opportunities like this don''t grow on trees.

People say that they should have known what fame would entail. Well, yeah, it seems like common sense, but people also have a strong sense of untouchable syndrome...that ''it won''t happen to me'' feeling. I don''t think any average person could possibly REALLY know how insane it could get until it was too late. The public always prefers the salicious over the sentimental.
Very good point. I haven''t watched the episode yet, but I do think this last paragraph from TGal is so true. Unless you grow up in Hollywood, you don''t know all the behind-the-camera stuff that goes on. I mean, they''re a little family in Pennsylvania, not some movie star couple (at least when it started). I''m not defending one side or the other, but I do think it''s unfair to say they knew what they were getting into. When TLC came along, they were just grasping for every possible penny, and I think this was a tremendous opportunity to save for their children and improve the financial situation. Whatever it was, they said it was just a great way to make memories of all their kids for the future. They talk in some episodes about how much off-camera work there is, with interviews/PR/meetings/etc - I''m sure they had no idea all that was going to be necessary. And I tell you what, I''d probably go absolutely crazy too with a crew of cameramen crowding my personal space at home all the time. It''s crazy when they show shots of that - she''s got like 4 people in the kitchen around her - no room to even breathe.
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Ugh, I don''t think I could do it. But then again, I''m sure the security for my kids would be a definite motivator for it though. I''m sure it''s a very tough situation to be in.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 12:23:32 PM
Author: luvthemstrawberries

Date: 5/26/2009 11:33:03 AM
Author: TravelingGal
I can''t fault this woman for milking the show for all its worth. When the show doesn''t get ratings anymore, I have no doubt that the producers will just cut them off. It''s business. They have EIGHT children to raise and if it were me, my mind would be in overddrive like hers is to try and get the most I can to secure their financial future. Sometimes I''m overwhelmed thinking about what I have to do to properly save for ONE child!

I haven''t seen much of the show but I do believe that if she could have all the help and financial stability without the fame, she would be happy to go back into obscurity. I have no doubt that both parents love those children. I don''t believe that she''s sucking those kids dry for her own happiness. She seems a savvy woman and probably knows the years for this gravy train are seriously numbered.

As far as her marriage goes, I think she''s choosing her kids over her husband. Yes, if her marriage mattered, she''d quit the show and focus on their family. But a huge part of stability in familial life comes from financial stability and opportunities like this don''t grow on trees.

People say that they should have known what fame would entail. Well, yeah, it seems like common sense, but people also have a strong sense of untouchable syndrome...that ''it won''t happen to me'' feeling. I don''t think any average person could possibly REALLY know how insane it could get until it was too late. The public always prefers the salicious over the sentimental.
Very good point. I haven''t watched the episode yet, but I do think this last paragraph from TGal is so true. Unless you grow up in Hollywood, you don''t know all the behind-the-camera stuff that goes on. I mean, they''re a little family in Pennsylvania, not some movie star couple (at least when it started). I''m not defending one side or the other, but I do think it''s unfair to say they knew what they were getting into. When TLC came along, they were just grasping for every possible penny, and I think this was a tremendous opportunity to save for their children and improve the financial situation. Whatever it was, they said it was just a great way to make memories of all their kids for the future. They talk in some episodes about how much off-camera work there is, with interviews/PR/meetings/etc - I''m sure they had no idea all that was going to be necessary. And I tell you what, I''d probably go absolutely crazy too with a crew of cameramen crowding my personal space at home all the time. It''s crazy when they show shots of that - she''s got like 4 people in the kitchen around her - no room to even breathe.
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Ugh, I don''t think I could do it. But then again, I''m sure the security for my kids would be a definite motivator for it though. I''m sure it''s a very tough situation to be in.
Correct me if I am wrong, but it wasn''t a series when it started, right? I can see a couple thinking it might be a fun thing to do a 1 hr (or however long it was) special on their family. They probably didn''t even think it would make them famous. After getting a nice paycheck and then being approached for another, it would be much easier to do it again. And then that snowball starts going downhill fast.

If it were me and I had 8 kids, I would have done that special, if only for the reason that they said they did it...it would be neat to have a professionally done video for prosperity. As the offers came in, we probably would have taken them thinking (naively) that our marriage was solid and severely underestimating what the cameras would do the children.

So, anyone ready for OCTO-MOM, the series???
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TGal, you are right that the thought of financially providing for ANY children let alone 8 is overwhelming. You are also correct that it started out as a series. However, I would have hoped over the years of raking in the money (with little expenses) they would invest and save the money so that when the gravy train stopped they would be okay. She also makes money off of speaking engagements and her book. According to articles I have read (but who knows what really is going on) is she is addicted to the fame. Insists on having her bodyguard with her at all times. Went tanning on her kid''s birthday. Is never home and John is actually the primary parent). I think they BOTH have made some poor choices. Hopefully whatever happens the kids will continue to be happy and well adjusted.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 10:40:09 AM
Author: Clairitek
What baffles me is how they are STILL doing the show. If I were in their shoes and had all sorts of horrible rumors flying around about me and my maybe cheating husband (he claims he didn't cheat but it sounds like there might have been some emotional cheating going on) I would be putting a stop to the show. How can continuing being in the spotlight do any good?

I agree with everyone that it was just uncomfortable to watch. They didn't appear to acknowledge each other AT ALL at the party but I do wonder if TLC just edited it out for the sake of ratings and wants us all to believe that they don't even talk now.
I think the show is their only real way of making money right now, since Kate quit her job as a nurse several years ago and Jon also is not working. With 8 young kids to raise means that she won't be able to go out into the workforce anytime soon, so I can't blame her for trying to make their family as financially stable as possible.

I watched last night's episode too and was left kind of wondering what was going to happen to them. It was really vague.....it kind of sounds like they might not be a future for them, but then again, TLC could just be editing that way (cutting out other important bits that hint to them staying together) so that people could keep watching and that the ratings would continue to be high. The show still is immensely popular and I think people do want to continue watching the family as they grow up. I don't agree that the Show's lost its appeal at all. I would love to see how the children develop as they get older and their personalities come out more.

I also was disappointed that she kind of blamed Jon for breaking down the marriage (his poor choices), but didn't even hint at her behaviour and the role it might have played in causing them to drift apart. I was watching a few episodes prior to the big Premiere and it really brought back how controlling and condescending she was to Jon. I'm sure every incident like that drove Jon further and further away from her, emotionally speaking.

I agree that raising multiples must put any marriage to the test, though. With 8 demanding children, your role has parents leaps to the frontburner, and sadly, your marriage/relationship takes second place. Then add in the stresses of child-rearing, and all the decisions on discpliine, responsibilities etc. I can totally see how the two of them would drift apart over the years. I wouldn't want that many kids for that reason. I really think that your marriage should be first priority- as the foundation on which your family life is built.
 
I totally agree with Tacori here, but also see what Tgal is saying. I didn't watch the episode, I've been boycotting the show for awhile now after all the falsehoods came to light (regarding the freebies and help that Kate claims not to have- personal chef yadda yadda that tacori mentioned), BUT, they currently make up to 70k per episode reportedly, in a 20 episode season, which is about 1.4 mil a year, not counting all the free stuff (Kate flies first class only, the free trips and the free food, sponsored gifts and things like that- including all home furnishings and house care) and they charge 20 bucks a pop per signed picture at all speaking gigs, not to mention the money they make per speaking gig and book signing and appearances. Now, if they had saved even ten percent of the money they had made over the past few years, that'd be a whole lot to keep if they move out of that Mc.Mansion the producers have moved them into. They wouldn't need to be in such need for making more episodes if they just went back to living as a normal family, albeit with 8 kids. If you don't have to pay out for ANYTHING in your home, including clothing your children, where does that money go? SAVE IT. Free your children! Put someone else first! Once they had that nest egg built up, they could quit the show and Jon could go back to work, since he stopped working (NOT because he was fired, which has been grossly reported) to do the show. Sure, one computer programmer's income isn't enough to support eight kids and a wife, but with the money they could have saved it would have helped.

Also, Kate has said that because of the way the six were created (medically assisted), society has a responsibility to help with the children, since modern medicine promotes the use of fertility drugs, which can lead to multiple births. That's just asinine. I think she's used to getting freebies and wants to continue to live her life that way, since she has said, she grew up with nothing and wants the most for the kids (and herself?). I don't know, it's unfair to the kids to have to spend their lives calling the babysitters Mommy.

ETA: Took me too long, Tacori summed my post of perfectly. Tacori's right, she went tanning on the kid's real birthdays, which was also Mother's Day. Shows her priorities right there.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 12:38:15 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
TGal, you are right that the thought of financially providing for ANY children let alone 8 is overwhelming. You are also correct that it started out as a series. However, I would have hoped over the years of raking in the money (with little expenses) they would invest and save the money so that when the gravy train stopped they would be okay. She also makes money off of speaking engagements and her book. According to articles I have read (but who knows what really is going on) is she is addicted to the fame. Insists on having her bodyguard with her at all times. Went tanning on her kid's birthday. Is never home and John is actually the primary parent). I think they BOTH have made some poor choices. Hopefully whatever happens the kids will continue to be happy and well adjusted.

Agreed. I think they started out with the best intentions and got caught up and lost themselves in the fame and money. I really feel for them. I'm sure that even with all the money and fame, neither ever wanted this.

I don't see how they can make it work with the TV show, but I also don't see how they can leave the TV show without causing financial strain. I know it seems like they have piles of money, but the reality is with that many children they will always need help, they can never both have jobs at the same time and raising 8 kids is very expensive. Daily expenses aside, can you imagine paying for sports teams and equipment for 8, birthday parties for 8, Christmas for 8, university for 8, weddings for 8... It's not like a regular job with an $80 000 a year salary is going to be able to take care of that many people. And can you imagine what nannies and daycare for 8 kids costs? They'd be working just to pay for childcare- they still need housing, food, heat, clothing, health insurance, etc...

I think it's really easy for us all to say what they *should* be doing, but really- how would anyone else know what it's like to have the exhaustion and financial strain of a family of 10? She may not speak to him nicely, but from what I understand, she's always been that way and he chose to marry her and have children with her knowing that. I know if I had tv cameras following me around all day, I'd be caught barking at my kids and husband too.

I just really hope for the sake of those kids that they can find a way back to eachother and who they were before all this.
 
On this thread and others, I have been shocked at the negative opinions voiced by women about Kate. Yes, she can sometimes have a biting tone, but I have seen a lot of criticism that she is to blame for her marital problems because she travels a lot. People, she is traveling to make money to support her family since her husband was fired from his job and apparently was unable/unwilling to find another one. Anyone think she might be a little bitter that she has to carry the financial burden herself? I know I would be. As for the fact that she asked for her marital problems, for him to cheat on her because she travels for work, this is ludicrous and insulting. There are a lot of men who travel for their jobs - are they asking for their wives to have affairs?
 
Date: 5/26/2009 12:57:05 PM
Author: NovemberBride
On this thread and others, I have been shocked at the negative opinions voiced by women about Kate. Yes, she can sometimes have a biting tone, but I have seen a lot of criticism that she is to blame for her marital problems because she travels a lot. People, she is traveling to make money to support her family since her husband was fired from his job and apparently was unable/unwilling to find another one. Anyone think she might be a little bitter that she has to carry the financial burden herself? I know I would be. As for the fact that she asked for her marital problems, for him to cheat on her because she travels for work, this is ludicrous and insulting. There are a lot of men who travel for their jobs - are they asking for their wives to have affairs?
Ditto

One of the worst things you could do to your partner is cheat and noone, not even Kate deserves that. He could have been a big boy and broke it off with her before making a public display for the whole world (especially his children) to see

I think people gravitate towards Jon and his side of the story because he is more likable and Kate is a strong personality. But they are each to blame. It takes two.

I am also surprised by the people that say Kate is a bad mom for leaving for work. For the first few years of the show Jon worked and Kate stayed home with the kids, I don''t think anyone called him a bad father for doing that. He even said a few times that he loved when Monday came around to get away from it all and go to work. In the earlier days it didn''t seem like Kate had a lot of help like she does now. Also I do think it is common for stay at home moms to want to get out and have a career too. Some women miss that.

I also have to say that a lot of people think Kate is a bad parent because of the way she raised her children on the show. I am a nanny and can tell you that MOST if not ALL parents would be called bad parents if we could watch the way they handle things in their home. Parents rarely always get it right, and it''s a lot easier to sit back and point out her flaws. I have cringed at a few things she has said/done in the past with the kids, but I cringe at things I see my bosses/other parents do all the time. Everyone parents differently.
 
Critics Pan Season 5 Premiere of Jon and Kate Plus Eight

Thoughts?

From the article: "For all the nasty and stupid reality shows I have seen over the years, I have to say this one did leave me feeling like I was looking in on something that I shouldn''t be watching," he [Zurwik of the Baltimore Sun] writes.

That pretty much sums up how I felt about last night''s episode. There''s nothing fun about watching a marriage fall apart, and I can''t see this season being about much else (unless they''re able to pull it together). The pain is there, on camera, for everyone to see, and you can''t dress it up with vacations or birthday parties. Not that TLC''s even trying, really.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 12:46:41 PM
Author: AmberWaves
I totally agree with Tacori here, but also see what Tgal is saying. I didn''t watch the episode, I''ve been boycotting the show for awhile now after all the falsehoods came to light (regarding the freebies and help that Kate claims not to have- personal chef yadda yadda that tacori mentioned), BUT, they currently make up to 70k per episode reportedly, in a 20 episode season, which is about 1.4 mil a year, not counting all the free stuff (Kate flies first class only, the free trips and the free food, sponsored gifts and things like that- including all home furnishings and house care) and they charge 20 bucks a pop per signed picture at all speaking gigs, not to mention the money they make per speaking gig and book signing and appearances. Now, if they had saved even ten percent of the money they had made over the past few years, that''d be a whole lot to keep if they move out of that Mc.Mansion the producers have moved them into. They wouldn''t need to be in such need for making more episodes if they just went back to living as a normal family, albeit with 8 kids. If you don''t have to pay out for ANYTHING in your home, including clothing your children, where does that money go? SAVE IT. Free your children! Put someone else first! Once they had that nest egg built up, they could quit the show and Jon could go back to work, since he stopped working (NOT because he was fired, which has been grossly reported) to do the show. Sure, one computer programmer''s income isn''t enough to support eight kids and a wife, but with the money they could have saved it would have helped.

Also, Kate has said that because of the way the six were created (medically assisted), society has a responsibility to help with the children, since modern medicine promotes the use of fertility drugs, which can lead to multiple births. That''s just asinine. I think she''s used to getting freebies and wants to continue to live her life that way, since she has said, she grew up with nothing and wants the most for the kids (and herself?). I don''t know, it''s unfair to the kids to have to spend their lives calling the babysitters Mommy.

ETA: Took me too long, Tacori summed my post of perfectly. Tacori''s right, she went tanning on the kid''s real birthdays, which was also Mother''s Day. Shows her priorities right there.
Oh come ON! It''s MOTHER''S DAY!!

If I had to deal with 8 children, you''d better believe I''d take an AFTERNOON on mother''s day to treat myself to something I wanted to do, even IF it was their birthdays. It''s mother''s day too! I have to make myself a priority for my sanity on MANY days because a happy mother is important to help make happy children.

Why do parents keep their kids up late, hauling their kids around so they can go out and have dinner at restaurants? Why do people get nannies or ask their parents to help raise their children? Why do moms go to the gym, leaving their tots in the gym''s chlidcare screaming their heads off (my friend kept attempting this for WEEKS before she finally gave up)?

Because mothers MUST be indulgent once in awhile. Doesn''t mean that in GENERAL our children are not our priority, but for a moment, we are putting ourselves first. IMHO, there is nothing wrong with that!

All the moms who currently have one kid know how tough it can be sometimes, even though we are fully competent. All the moms with one kid look at the moms with two kids (especially twins!) in awe. I can''t imagine what it does to you to have eight kids. Honestly, even with one child, some days I struggle to find my sense of self.

I''ve told TGuy that mother''s day is more important to me than my birthday. He thought I was kidding and said, "Yeah right, bullsh*t." I looked him square in the eye and said, "Buddy, I''ve EARNED this one."
 
Date: 5/26/2009 12:57:05 PM
Author: NovemberBride
On this thread and others, I have been shocked at the negative opinions voiced by women about Kate. Yes, she can sometimes have a biting tone, but I have seen a lot of criticism that she is to blame for her marital problems because she travels a lot. People, she is traveling to make money to support her family since her husband was fired from his job and apparently was unable/unwilling to find another one. Anyone think she might be a little bitter that she has to carry the financial burden herself? I know I would be. As for the fact that she asked for her marital problems, for him to cheat on her because she travels for work, this is ludicrous and insulting. There are a lot of men who travel for their jobs - are they asking for their wives to have affairs?

Well there has been rumors that Kate is cheating AS WELL. I don''t think it is such a black and white situation. Sounds like there are separated but put on an act for their TV show. Yes, Kate is taking an active role of the primary breadwinner *but* I think they would live VERY comfortably on what they make from the show w/o the proceeds from her book tour. Who knows if John was unwilling to get another job. I had the impression they BOTH were caretakers when the children were young b/c I don''t know ANYONE who could handle 8 babies at once. Also there is NOTHING wrong with being a SAHD. How is that selfish? Also Kate has always been a very negative, difficult person (even in the early days). The fact that she no longer speaks to any of her family or seems to have any close friends is kind of interesting. But really it is all gossip since John and Kate are not on here to tell their side of the story.
 
I have followed J&K on and off for the last few years. The show has changed a lot, and so have they through the years. I agree with some of the other posters who have noted that in the beginning it was much more about how a "normal" family was living with the tremendous responsibility of raising 8 kids. But - over the years so much support (nannies, cooks, etc.) has been given to them through the show, not to mention the money they make off of the show itself. What is interesting is that in the show - they don''t put any of this out there - in fact they often deny it. It is not just John and Kate, they have full time support in many areas of their life. So, it is not about a "normal" family anymore - what normal family has cooks, nannies, drivers, assistants, maids, etc.
Also, not sure if anyone has ever read "Aunt Jodi''s" blog. She may have her own agenda, or it may truly be out of concern for the children that she does this - but it is interesting in any case.


http://truthbreedshatred.blogspot.com/ -- Aunt Jodi''s blog

http://www.radaronline.com/videos#/23708269001 -- Interview with Aunt Jodi and husband regarding an alleged "contract" Kate asked Jon to sign that essentially allow him to "do his thing" as long as he keeps up appearances and tapes as needed for the show.
 
If you watch the show, Kate's treatment of Jon is more problematic than just a biting tone. She dismisses him, and belittles him, and he doesn't stand up for himself.

The show may have a significant staged/scripted component, but certain aspects of their personalities are come across accurately just the same... It is by no means OK that Jon cheat on Kate as a method of expressing his disapproval with the situation, but if you watch the show you can imagine that this is the kind of path he would take to make his point... a passive, nonconfrontational path. Even if he didn't cheat, he is looking elsewhere for companionship and making poor choices for a married, paparazzi-stalked father who stars in a family-friendly reality show. But he is making these choices as a method of getting what he needs. And it sounds like he finally got Kate's attention and made her notice that there was a problem with their marriage and he was unhappy, even if he unwittingly had to harness the pap's to get it across.

This show is definitely approaching train-wreck territory. It was always kind of a spectacle, gawking show where viewers voyeuristically watched them deal with the minutia of raising 8 kids, it has just now taken on a tabloid-turn with the marriage troubles.

Besides even watching the marriage troubles unfold, I am interested to see how TLC handles it going forward... Will the address it head on? Indirectly? or will they gloss over it now that they have acknowledged the troubles and put on a nice pretend show for the cameras/family-friendly audience? (OK, people could argue it was always a pretend show, but there are degrees.)
 
Tgal, I totally agree with you about Mother's Day (ask my mom! We took her out for Mother's day ON MY DAD'S BIRTHDAY).

I should add:

I've nannied for years, preemies and infants through age thirteen. I've been with parents who are never home, don't throw the birthday parties (not saying J&K do this), I've been the one who wakes up every half hour to soothe a colicky baby- I know it's difficult. I was the only one, I had NO help- no Jon, no Nannies, no other little siblings to play with the babies/children but I did it because I loved the kids so much (actually I work for the parents now so I can be around the kids). I never got a Mother's Day, most of the time I wasn't even paid minimum wage, but if someone didn't care for those kids, I WOULD. So yeah, even though I'm not a mother yet (give me 26 more weeks), I know it's hard.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 1:13:37 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Oh come ON! It''s MOTHER''S DAY!!

If I had to deal with 8 children, you''d better believe I''d take an AFTERNOON on mother''s day to treat myself to something I wanted to do, even IF it was their birthdays. It''s mother''s day too! I have to make myself a priority for my sanity on MANY days because a happy mother is important to help make happy children.

Why do parents keep their kids up late, hauling their kids around so they can go out and have dinner at restaurants? Why do people get nannies or ask their parents to help raise their children? Why do moms go to the gym, leaving their tots in the gym''s chlidcare screaming their heads off (my friend kept attempting this for WEEKS before she finally gave up)?

Because mothers MUST be indulgent once in awhile. Doesn''t mean that in GENERAL our children are not our priority, but for a moment, we are putting ourselves first. IMHO, there is nothing wrong with that!

All the moms who currently have one kid know how tough it can be sometimes, even though we are fully competent. All the moms with one kid look at the moms with two kids (especially twins!) in awe. I can''t imagine what it does to you to have eight kids. Honestly, even with one child, some days I struggle to find my sense of self.

I''ve told TGuy that mother''s day is more important to me than my birthday. He thought I was kidding and said, ''Yeah right, bullsh*t.'' I looked him square in the eye and said, ''Buddy, I''ve EARNED this one.''
Well said TGal. It''s a HARD job being a mom and I was wondering if maybe going tanning is her 15 minutes to lay in a warm tanning bed, shut off her brain and know that no one is going to bother her, call her, touch her, whine to her for 15 whole minutes!

I know people keep saying that they need to make their marriage a priority, and I agree that in theory, it''s a great idea. But how do you do that with 8 kids? I have 2 kids and a very good relationship with my dh and there are times when it''s hard and I don''t have time to give him the attention he wants and vice versa. I know when I have two 5 year olds in my house for an afternoon, I''m dying for the playdate to end because I''m exhausted! I can''t imagine 6 of them at a time...
 
Date: 5/26/2009 1:27:13 PM
Author: upgrade

Date: 5/26/2009 1:13:37 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Oh come ON! It''s MOTHER''S DAY!!

If I had to deal with 8 children, you''d better believe I''d take an AFTERNOON on mother''s day to treat myself to something I wanted to do, even IF it was their birthdays. It''s mother''s day too! I have to make myself a priority for my sanity on MANY days because a happy mother is important to help make happy children.

Why do parents keep their kids up late, hauling their kids around so they can go out and have dinner at restaurants? Why do people get nannies or ask their parents to help raise their children? Why do moms go to the gym, leaving their tots in the gym''s chlidcare screaming their heads off (my friend kept attempting this for WEEKS before she finally gave up)?

Because mothers MUST be indulgent once in awhile. Doesn''t mean that in GENERAL our children are not our priority, but for a moment, we are putting ourselves first. IMHO, there is nothing wrong with that!

All the moms who currently have one kid know how tough it can be sometimes, even though we are fully competent. All the moms with one kid look at the moms with two kids (especially twins!) in awe. I can''t imagine what it does to you to have eight kids. Honestly, even with one child, some days I struggle to find my sense of self.

I''ve told TGuy that mother''s day is more important to me than my birthday. He thought I was kidding and said, ''Yeah right, bullsh*t.'' I looked him square in the eye and said, ''Buddy, I''ve EARNED this one.''
Well said TGal. It''s a HARD job being a mom and I was wondering if maybe going tanning is her 15 minutes to lay in a warm tanning bed, shut off her brain and know that no one is going to bother her, call her, touch her, whine to her for 15 whole minutes!

I know people keep saying that they need to make their marriage a priority, and I agree that in theory, it''s a great idea. But how do you do that with 8 kids? I have 2 kids and a very good relationship with my dh and there are times when it''s hard and I don''t have time to give him the attention he wants and vice versa. I know when I have two 5 year olds in my house for an afternoon, I''m dying for the playdate to end because I''m exhausted! I can''t imagine 6 of them at a time...
I agree. I don''t know one mom who doesn''t get snippy with her husband regarding the kids because, let''s face it, moms are more competent than dads.
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I don''t think there would be one of us here who if faced with eight children wouldn''t turn on the control factor into overdrive. I''m very diplomatic with TGuy now when I want him to consider a suggestion because I do believe it''s important for him to do things without feeling like he''s scrutinized. With 8 kids, I think my diplomacy would be out the window. It would be all about survival.

I was reading one comment on a newsite regarding an episode where Kate appears so anal because she''s freaked out that the kids are a mess after eating icecream in Florida. Jon told her, who cares? Let them bathe in it!

I agree, in theory. Kids should be kids. Ice cream won''t kill anybody if it''s all over your face and your clothes and you have sticky fingers. But he''s thinking, "geez, they''ll be fine." SHE''S thinking, "great, now *I* have to change 8 shirts and 8 pairs of pants and wash 16 hands and 8 wry wriggly faces." I know how exasperated I feel when Amelia throws her food all over and gets it in her hair, etc. I just think, great...more WORK. I don''t need MORE WORK.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 1:24:50 PM
Author: cara
If you watch the show, Kate''s treatment of Jon is more problematic than just a biting tone. She dismisses him, and belittles him, and he doesn''t stand up for himself.

The show may have a significant staged/scripted component, but certain aspects of their personalities are come across accurately just the same... It is by no means OK that Jon cheat on Kate as a method of expressing his disapproval with the situation, but if you watch the show you can imagine that this is the kind of path he would take to make his point... a passive, nonconfrontational path. Even if he didn''t cheat, he is looking elsewhere for companionship and making poor choices for a married, paparazzi-stalked father who stars in a family-friendly reality show. But he is making these choices as a method of getting what he needs. And it sounds like he finally got Kate''s attention and made her notice that there was a problem with their marriage and he was unhappy, even if he unwittingly had to harness the pap''s to get it across.

This show is definitely approaching train-wreck territory. It was always kind of a spectacle, gawking show where viewers voyeuristically watched them deal with the minutia of raising 8 kids, it has just now taken on a tabloid-turn with the marriage troubles.

Besides even watching the marriage troubles unfold, I am interested to see how TLC handles it going forward... Will the address it head on? Indirectly? or will they gloss over it now that they have acknowledged the troubles and put on a nice pretend show for the cameras/family-friendly audience? (OK, people could argue it was always a pretend show, but there are degrees.)
This is all I am saying. People only treat you the way you allow them to treat you. I don''t think there can really be a victim when either party can leave at any time.

I also agree that MOST people who cheat do it because they feel trapped and they want to satisfy what they need in the least confrontational way possible. One of my friends cheated on her husband because he was emotionally abusive to her. He would go weeks without talking to her and got drunk and stoned and passed out and they only had sex 3 times in 3 years. She felt trapped and also wanted to act out so she cheated. I say the same to her, shame on him for treating her that way, but shame on her for creating more problems instead of solving the real problem by ending the relationship.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 1:15:15 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring

Date: 5/26/2009 12:57:05 PM
Author: NovemberBride
On this thread and others, I have been shocked at the negative opinions voiced by women about Kate. Yes, she can sometimes have a biting tone, but I have seen a lot of criticism that she is to blame for her marital problems because she travels a lot. People, she is traveling to make money to support her family since her husband was fired from his job and apparently was unable/unwilling to find another one. Anyone think she might be a little bitter that she has to carry the financial burden herself? I know I would be. As for the fact that she asked for her marital problems, for him to cheat on her because she travels for work, this is ludicrous and insulting. There are a lot of men who travel for their jobs - are they asking for their wives to have affairs?

Well there has been rumors that Kate is cheating AS WELL. I don''t think it is such a black and white situation. Sounds like there are separated but put on an act for their TV show. Yes, Kate is taking an active role of the primary breadwinner *but* I think they would live VERY comfortably on what they make from the show w/o the proceeds from her book tour. Who knows if John was unwilling to get another job. I had the impression they BOTH were caretakers when the children were young b/c I don''t know ANYONE who could handle 8 babies at once. Also there is NOTHING wrong with being a SAHD. How is that selfish? Also Kate has always been a very negative, difficult person (even in the early days). The fact that she no longer speaks to any of her family or seems to have any close friends is kind of interesting. But really it is all gossip since John and Kate are not on here to tell their side of the story.
Ditto Tacori. Would you have had sympathy for Jon being the sole breadwinner when Kate decided to stay home? Honestly, I think with 8 kids, one parent would have to stay home until the kids were in school unless there was a multitude of free, competent babysitters. And Kate makes more money, so it seems obvious that she should be the one working. No, her working doesn''t excuse him cheating. IMO, nothing excuses him cheating.

And Tgal, I agree, she''s definitely putting her kids first. However, I feel like there''s a trade off when you strain your marriage to a breaking point to get your kids bigger and better stuff. At what point does a person draw the line? Is it better for the kids to have two happy parents in their household or better for the kids to have college funds and not have to wear second hand clothes? People can put themselves through college, and kids will survive wearing clothes from Goodwill. I think it''s harder for kids to get over a (very publicized) divorce and the breaking of a family unit.

As with most relationships, the strain and the distance is from both of them, and it will take both of them to fix it. They''ve got my sympathy, for being in this situation and doubly for feeling like they have to do it in front of the whole country. But where I get fed up is when Kate tries to lay all of the blame on Jon. This is a mess BOTH of them made.
 
I actually watched the show last night, which was the first one in quite some time. I stopped watching a long time ago because Kate's treatment of her husband made me uncomfortable and I would literally cringe when watching it. Anyways in regards to last nite's episode, it was like a train wreck - I couldn't look away. It seems to me that they are separated and will most likely divorce. I didn't see a lot of hope for them working things out. To be honest, they are just two people who have gone in two different directions. Jon is sedate, go with the flow type of guy. Kate is controlling and harsh. She seems to enjoy fame and he doesn't. I didn't see how they were able to get along for as long as they did.
It's obvious Jon has lost all sense of happiness. His wife belittles him on national tv, he has no way of earning a living because he must stay home with the kids (not saying that's bad - some dads love it - just that for some men, earning a living equates with a sense of pride for taking care of their family), he is constantly being criticized by Kate, and is tired of the cameras. It seems that what Kate wants, Kate gets. Kate wanted more kids so Jon gave in. Kate wants the cameras around so Jon puts up with it. Enough is enough. I feel for the kids. There is no way they don't know what is going on.
To me, Kate is not the same person she was in the beginning episodes. Sure, she was bossy and demanding, but she just seems like a completely different person. I mean, she even looks completely different. Gone are the casual days of sweatpants and a tshirt. Now it's designer duds, high heels, highlighted coiffed hair, and bleached teeth. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with that at all, in fact it is good to take pride in one's appearance. I just can't shake this feeling every time I look at her that she is extremely arrogant. It's just the aura that she gives off. Let's just say she's not someone I would hang out with.
 
Date: 5/26/2009 1:26:36 PM
Author: AmberWaves
Tgal, I totally agree with you about Mother''s Day (ask my mom! We took her out for Mother''s day ON MY DAD''S BIRTHDAY).

I should add:

I''ve nannied for years, preemies and infants through age thirteen. I''ve been with parents who are never home, don''t throw the birthday parties (not saying J&K do this), I''ve been the one who wakes up every half hour to soothe a colicky baby- I know it''s difficult. I was the only one, I had NO help- no Jon, no Nannies, no other little siblings to play with the babies/children but I did it because I loved the kids so much (actually I work for the parents now so I can be around the kids). I never got a Mother''s Day, most of the time I wasn''t even paid minimum wage, but if someone didn''t care for those kids, I WOULD. So yeah, even though I''m not a mother yet (give me 26 more weeks), I know it''s hard.
This year my younger charge''s teacher gave me a flower along with my charge''s mother for Mother''s Day! I thought it was so sweet to be recognized. Made my day! But I''m sure there would be mothers who would be offended that I was also honored.

I do want to add that I have been a nanny for 8 years now, "professional nanny" for 3, and I have never worked for a family who wasn''t involved with the children as much as I was. While there are lots of parents who let nannies raise their children, it is possible to be great parents and still work and employ a nanny to help when you aren''t there.
 
Yeah, Mia, I think the parents I worked for weren''t very happy they had children- I was alone all the time. We''d go to Vegas and I''d never see them until the flight home. The kids used to call me Mommy by accident, which was utterly sad! Now that I''m pregnant, the idea of someone else being there for the first steps, first word, first solid food just kills me. I wish I had gotten flowers!
 
Date: 5/26/2009 1:51:19 PM
Author: AmberWaves
Yeah, Mia, I think the parents I worked for weren't very happy they had children- I was alone all the time. We'd go to Vegas and I'd never see them until the flight home. The kids used to call me Mommy by accident, which was utterly sad! Now that I'm pregnant, the idea of someone else being there for the first steps, first word, first solid food just kills me. I wish I had gotten flowers!
Aw that is so sad.... I used to think I would like a position like that because I would have more freedom and control and sometimes it gets annoying when the parents come home and the children are wild because the parents aren't as strict as I was or whatever, but really children need THEIR parents more than anyone else. I feel the same about my own children too, I don't want to miss one minute.

ETA- oh that should read "future children"
 
I didn''t even put it together that their birthdays fell on mother''s day. Still...I don''t know. I AM a fan of mother''s day (though mine totally blew this year) but she is NOT a normal mom. She can leave and go tanning (which I also feel is kinda selfish for other reasons) whenever she wants. It wasn''t a treat for her. I have to beg, borrow and steal just to run to target for 15 mins. w/o my kid.
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Amber & Mia, those stories are heartbreaking. The kids were lucky to have both of you in their lives.
 
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