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strmrdr

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A newlywed couple were struggling to establish themselves financially. The husband frequently complained about the costs of running the household and his wife’s inability to stick to a budget. Soon, they had a set of twins. This doubled all their expenses, and the husband complained even more. One day, he complained that his wife was using too much baby powder on the twins. But she was quick to point out that talc is cheap.
 

AGBF

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But one cannot use talc anymore. And I bet the price of cornstarch has gone up now that corn is a source of fuel for our cars. The poor American babies will have a baby powder shortage! [I am trying to remember how often I actually used any powder on my baby! I didn''t treat her like a donut or a tea cake to be powdered regularly as I recall ;-).]

Deb
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risingsun

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Kaleigh

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LOL!!!
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Skippy123

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heeeheeeee
 

isaku5

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A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they''re stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, little Jake stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you''re stupid, Jake?" " No Ma''am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
 

dianne

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When a cow gets tickled does milk come out of it''s nose?
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dianne

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My bf said that I should get one of those mood rings so he would always have a color-coded clue as to my "frame of mind". He has found out that when I am happy it turns green...and when I'm very unhappy it leaves a red mark on his forehead...
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hikerchick

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Q: Why did the guy get fired from the Orange Juice factory?
A: He couldn''t concentrate

Hardy HAR HAR . . .
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justjulia

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Date: 3/24/2007 8:26:55 PM
Author:strmrdr
A newlywed couple were struggling to establish themselves financially. The husband frequently complained about the costs of running the household and his wife’s inability to stick to a budget. Soon, they had a set of twins. This doubled all their expenses, and the husband complained even more. One day, he complained that his wife was using too much baby powder on the twins. But she was quick to point out that talc is cheap.
Ok, I''m the biggest idiot here. I didn''t get it. I read it to my husband and he immediately got it. I''m a little sloooowwww.
 

poptart

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Date: 3/28/2007 6:59:05 PM
Author: justjulia
Date: 3/24/2007 8:26:55 PM

Author:strmrdr

A newlywed couple were struggling to establish themselves financially. The husband frequently complained about the costs of running the household and his wife’s inability to stick to a budget. Soon, they had a set of twins. This doubled all their expenses, and the husband complained even more. One day, he complained that his wife was using too much baby powder on the twins. But she was quick to point out that talc is cheap.
Ok, I''m the biggest idiot here. I didn''t get it. I read it to my husband and he immediately got it. I''m a little sloooowwww.

Don''t feel bad. I didn''t get it either. I still don''t...

*M*
 

dianne

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Three women die together in an accident
And go to heaven.

When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: don''t step on the ducks!"


So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one.


Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw.


St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!"


The next day, the second woman accidentally steps on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn''t miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together to spend eternity as he did for the first woman.


The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she steps.


She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on ... very tall, long eyelashes, muscular, and thin.


St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.


The happy woman says, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?"


The guy says, "I don''t know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"

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strmrdr

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Date: 3/28/2007 7:29:51 PM
Author: poptart

Date: 3/28/2007 6:59:05 PM
Author: justjulia

Date: 3/24/2007 8:26:55 PM

Author:strmrdr

A newlywed couple were struggling to establish themselves financially. The husband frequently complained about the costs of running the household and his wife’s inability to stick to a budget. Soon, they had a set of twins. This doubled all their expenses, and the husband complained even more. One day, he complained that his wife was using too much baby powder on the twins. But she was quick to point out that talc is cheap.
Ok, I''m the biggest idiot here. I didn''t get it. I read it to my husband and he immediately got it. I''m a little sloooowwww.

Don''t feel bad. I didn''t get it either. I still don''t...

*M*
talc is cheap == talk is cheap
 

strmrdr

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Beware New Virus - W.O.R.K.


There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand.


This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK).


If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT.


This virus will wipe out your private life completely.


If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest grocery store. Purchase the antidote known as;


Work-Isolating-Neutralizer-Extract (WINE) Or; Bothersome-Employer-Elimination-Rebooter (BEER).


Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.


You should forward this warning to 5 friends. If you do not have 5 friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.
 

strmrdr

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A Young Marine on his first day at his new duty station calls his wife... "Honey, I''m going to be really late tonight! The Commander held an inspection and discovered a large assortment of "Dirty" magazines in the Squad area so we''re all going to be punished!"


The wife erupts in a tirade..."Since when is that a problem?, at your other base they did not make a big stink and there were dirty pictures and centerfolds all over the place yada...yada..yada......"


So when she finishes there is a confused few moments of silence and then......"Honey, Rifle Magazines...Dirty rifle Magazines!!!"

 

justjulia

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I got those!
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poptart

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Date: 3/29/2007 8:43:10 PM
Author: strmrdr
Date: 3/28/2007 7:29:51 PM

Author: poptart


Date: 3/28/2007 6:59:05 PM

Author: justjulia


Date: 3/24/2007 8:26:55 PM


Author:strmrdr


A newlywed couple were struggling to establish themselves financially. The husband frequently complained about the costs of running the household and his wife’s inability to stick to a budget. Soon, they had a set of twins. This doubled all their expenses, and the husband complained even more. One day, he complained that his wife was using too much baby powder on the twins. But she was quick to point out that talc is cheap.
Ok, I''m the biggest idiot here. I didn''t get it. I read it to my husband and he immediately got it. I''m a little sloooowwww.


Don''t feel bad. I didn''t get it either. I still don''t...


*M*
talc is cheap == talk is cheap
Oh! Hahaha. Thank you. I''m so dumb. I just could NOT figure it out!

*M*
 
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